Mutiny of the Heart

by McDonough, Vickie;

  Amelia’s warm smile chased away some of Heather’s anxiety. “The Scriptures say to believe on the Lord Jesus Christ and you shall be saved. We are also instructed to repent of our sins.”

  Heather glanced at Caroline, who smiled and nodded her agreement. “It’s that simple.”

  She stared out the window, longing for peace. Most of her life had been spent in turmoil. Her mother had lost several babies then finally died giving birth to another child who failed to survive. Her father had disappeared for months at a time, leaving her in the care of a coldhearted governess. When he was home, he drank until he could no longer function. Then just when she came of age and hoped she might find a decent man to marry and give her some stability, her father had lost their home by gambling and had hauled her off to the Nova Scotia wilderness. Deborah had been her only close companion until she died, and then a year ago, Heather’s father passed away, leaving only Jamie and a few neighbors, none of whom she was close to.

  She heaved a heavy sigh. If God could fill the emptiness in her heart, then she welcomed Him. She looked at Amelia and nodded. “How do I ask Him?”

  Amelia took hold of her hands. “Just what I said before. Talk to God, either out loud or in your head. Tell Him that you believe that Jesus Christ is His Son and that He died to save you from sin.”

  Bowing her head, Heather focused her attention on her sins. She hadn’t been a naughty child, but surely she’d done many things that were wrong in God’s eyes. She couldn’t bear to say the words out loud, so she prayed in her mind. Dear God, I do believe in Jesus, Your Son, and I thank You that He died for me. I’m truly sorry for the bad things I’ve done, whether intentionally or not. Forgive me for losing Jamie.

  The weight of that thought caught in her throat, making it hard to breathe. But she pressed on, determined to make peace with God. Thank You for saving me. And please, Lord, show Lucas where Jamie is.

  She sat with her head bowed for a while longer. She wasn’t sure, but it felt as if the strain of the day lessened. Finally, she peered up, catching both women eyeing her with open curiosity. “I did it.”

  A breath whooshed out of Amelia, warming Heather’s face. She cupped Heather’s cheek. “Wonderful.”

  Caroline reached out and bridged the gap between them, touching Heather’s arm. “I’m so happy for you. The angels in heaven are rejoicing this day.”

  “I hope the angels are helping look for Jamie.” Heather ducked her head and picked a seedpod off her skirt.

  Both Amelia and Caroline chuckled. “I’m sure they are,” Amelia said. “Now, would you like to join Caroline and me in prayer for Jamie?”

  “Aye. I would.” Heather closed her eyes, feeling a unity with God she’d never before encountered. Her chest warmed as Amelia pleaded out loud for Jamie’s safe return. Heather felt as if God granted her the assurance that the lad would be home soon. One thing was for certain—she was not the same woman she’d been this morning. God had washed her clean—white as snow.

  That evening as the sun began to set, Heather lit several lanterns and hung them on the front porch to help Lucas find his way back home. Amelia did the same upstairs and placed them in the windows, while Caroline helped Mable in the kitchen. With the light fading, the men would soon cease their search. Jamie would be frightened and alone all night. “Please, Father. Bring them home. All of them.”

  Heather opened the door to go inside when she heard a dog bark. She spun around and hurried to the railing, searching the twilight. Large, dark shapes emerged from the trees and plodded toward her. Lucas!

  She snatched up a lantern and scurried down the stairs. One horse broke into a gallop and closed the distance. Lucas stared down at her, looking tired and revealing nothing in his expression. But where was Jamie?

  Her heart near shattering, she gazed at the silhouettes of the other horses but couldn’t make out if he was on one of them. Then she looked up at Lucas again and noticed the little hands on his waist. “Jamie!”

  “Aunt Heather!”

  Lucas slid Jamie around and lowered him to the ground. Heather nearly dropped the lantern in her effort to grab hold of the lad. “Oh Jamie. You scared half my life off of me.”

  He hugged her neck so hard she could barely breathe. She squeezed him back, relishing the scent that was only his.

  “Ow. That hurts.”

  Reluctantly, she released him. “Where were you? Why did you run off?”

  “I didn’t. I was chasing that bird. Then I saw a squirrel and chased it. It went up a tree. So I decided to go in the barn and see the horses.”

  “You know you’re not supposed to go there alone.”

  He shrugged and glanced up at his father. Lucas dismounted but didn’t add anything.

  “I didn’t. I saw a lad sneak out of the barn carrying the blanket Samuel puts on Papa’s horse. He didn’t see me because I hid behind a bush.”

  Heather clutched her chest. Jamie had encountered the thief?

  “I followed to see where he took the blanket. I thought he must be the thief Papa was looking for.”

  “Oh Jamie, don’t you know how dangerous that was? What if that lad had hurt you?”

  The dogs scurried over then flopped down in the grass near Jamie, their pink tongues hanging limp from the side of their mouths. They looked well satisfied. The other two horses stopped just past Lucas’s, and the men dismounted. Richard walked into the circle of light, carrying a sleeping young lass with matted brown hair and a filthy dress. The poor thing was barefoot. Ben joined them, leading a dirty lad who looked about ten years old. His tattered clothing was a grimy gray. His shoulder-length blond hair was ratted and held pieces of hay, and listless green eyes peered at her. She glanced at Lucas.

  “We need to get these children cleaned up so they can eat,” he said. “We’re all starving.”

  Quick footsteps sounded in the darkness, and Samuel appeared. “Praise be to God. You’s found him.”

  Lucas nodded. “Yes, thanks to the good Lord’s guidance and Ben’s dogs.” He handed his horse’s reins to Samuel. “Could you also see to the other horses?”

  “Yassah. Don’t you worry. I’s a gonna take good care of ‘em.” He gathered up the reins and led the three horses away.

  Jamie tugged her arm. “I haven’t eaten since breakfast.”

  “And whose fault is that?” She was so relieved to have him back that her worry turned to irritation.

  “Jamie knows it was wrong to run off after Kit.” Lucas rubbed the lad’s hair.

  “I was just trying to protect our stuff, Papa.”

  “I know, and I appreciate that, but next time come and find me or one of the other men. Run on along now. Your grandmother will be anxious to see you.”

  Jamie trotted off toward the big house, but when he reached the stairs, he turned back toward them and waved. Richard and Ben followed along with the two orphans in tow. Heather, not ready to be separated from Jamie again, started to follow, but Lucas grabbed her arm.

  “Wait.”

  She turned to face him. Was he going to discharge her now? Did he despise her for falling asleep and allowing Jamie to wander off? And where did he find those children? “Who is Kit?”

  Lucas sighed, his warm breath touching her face. “He’s the boy. The girl is Janey, his sister.”

  Her heart ached for the ragamuffins. “Where did you find them?”

  “They’d set up camp about a half mile from here in a group of trees near the creek. I’m surprised the fieldworkers never saw them since they walk past those trees every day on their way to the rice fields and back.”

  “But where did they come from?” Heather relaxed now that Lucas wasn’t snipping at her as he’d done earlier in the day.

  “Charleston. Their father was a sailor who died at sea. Their mother—” Lucas stared up at the sky. “She became a dock strumpet after her husband’s death. She couldn’t feed her children, so she started taking in men. One of them killed her, and Kit took his sister a
nd ran away, fearing for their lives. Somehow they stowed away on a vessel bound inland. Kit’s been stealing things just so they can survive.”

  “Those poor children.” In spite of the lad endangering Jamie, she couldn’t help feeling sympathy for him and his sister.

  A horse whinnied off in the distance, and a warm gust of wind caused the lantern to flicker and go out. Heather held her skirts down. One might even call their environment romantic, if there weren’t so many unknowns. “So how did you find the children?”

  “The dogs led us to Jamie—and he was with them, trying to talk them into returning here with him.”

  Heather smiled. That was her lad—kind and generous, just like his father. She swallowed hard. Did Lucas still care for her? Losing a man’s only son could cause some men to become fighting mad. Lucas seemed overly quiet and hadn’t said anything except to answer her questions. “Well … I suppose I should get inside and help get the children cleaned up. Whatever will you do with them?”

  “They have no family. Richard seems to think Caroline will be agreeable to taking them in. They’ve wanted children for a long while but haven’t had any.”

  “That would be nice. She would make a wonderful mother.” She started to turn away but couldn’t. “I’m so sorry, Lucas. I didn’t sleep well last night—I know it’s not a decent excuse. I fell asleep when I should have been watching Jamie.” Her lower lip trembled. “I don’t know how I would have survived if something had happened to him.”

  “I know. I felt the same.” He exhaled another sigh. “I’m sorry I was so short with you. When you said Jamie was missing, I didn’t … know how to bear it. I’ll admit I was upset with you, but I was wrong.” He stepped closer and found her hands in the dark. “I was a young boy once, and I know how often I tried to sneak away from my governess. Will you forgive me?”

  Heather closed her eyes, not believing what she was hearing. He wasn’t going to turn her out. He wanted her to forgive him. “I’m the one who needs your forgiveness.”

  “Then shall we agree to forgive one another?” His voice took on a husky tone.

  “Aye,” she whispered. “I … um … asked God to save me today and prayed with your mother and Caroline for you to find Jamie.”

  He ran his hand down the side of her head. “I can’t tell you how happy that makes me. My relationship with God is the only thing I place above family.”

  She longed to be a part of that family but was afraid to hope. Too many things in her life hadn’t gone as planned. “You’re a good man, Lucas.”

  “Would you run screaming to the house if I were to kiss you?”

  Heather giggled at the silly picture that popped into her mind. “Nay, I would not.”

  He drew his hand to her face. Her breath quickened.

  “I don’t know how I survived all these years without Jamie and you in my life. Do you understand, Heather? I fear I am falling in love with you.”

  Tears stung her eyes for the hundredth time that day. “I feared you’d release me.”

  “Never.” He cleared his throat. “I mean, only if you wish to be released.”

  She shook her head. He lowered his face, and his lips met hers. She clutched his arms tightly; then he drew her to him, deepening the kiss. It was everything she’d dreamed of and more, but it was over far too soon.

  He pressed his forehead against hers. “Is our relationship advancing too quickly for you? I’ll be thirty in a few weeks, and I’m ready to move on with my life. Deborah will always hold a place in my heart, but that’s in the past. I want you to be my future.”

  Heather leaned her head against his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. He smelled manly—of the outdoors. “I care for you, too, Lucas. I’ve never been close to a man before.”

  He leaned back as if to look in her face. The lights from the house faintly illuminated his surprised expression. Then he grinned. “You mean I’m the only man you’ve ever kissed?”

  “You don’t have to say it as if you’re so proud. I had Jamie to care for and never found a man that interested me.”

  His grin widened. “Until now.”

  “Aye.”

  He cupped his hands around her face. “Good. I like that.” He kissed her again, their lips and their breath melding together. After he placed another quick peck on her lips, he stepped back. “I suppose we should go in. Mother will call out the militia if we don’t return soon.”

  “I imagine she would.” Heather took his arm.

  Lucas bent and retrieved the lantern then escorted her to the house. Excitement pulsed through her.

  Jamie was safe.

  God had redeemed her, and she was falling in love. This miserable day had turned out surprisingly well.

  thirteen

  After depositing Jamie into Samuel’s care, Heather hurried back to the house. While he was occupied with his riding lesson, she was determined to share her idea with Lucas. She’d hoped to have a surprise party, but with Lucas’s birthday just two weeks away, she’d need his help and his mother’s to pull off such a large event.

  Hurrying up the steep stairs to the back door, she considered how much had changed since she’d first come to Charleston. Jamie and his father were getting along as if Lucas had raised him from birth. Such a feat could only be the hand of God.

  Her heart warmed at thoughts of her heavenly Father and how He’d come into her heart so recently. Her whole outlook on life had changed. She now had hope, where before she had only an abysmal future. Her relationship with Lucas had continued to grow, and she might soon find herself married. A smile tugged at her lips at the thought of being Lucas Reed’s wife. And too, she’d never have to leave Jamie. He’d be her son, just as she’d dreamed. Afraid to allow her hopes to soar too high, she pulled them back. From now on, she would leave her future to God.

  She searched the downstairs rooms then headed upstairs when she didn’t find Lucas. He was probably in his office, as he was most early afternoons. Her footsteps echoed through the open upstairs parlor where guests were generally entertained. She could hold the party here, but Amelia thought it best to have it at the Charleston home so the majority of the guests would have less of a distance to travel.

  Lucas wasn’t in his office, but rather leaning against a pillar on the veranda reading a book. She smiled at the picture he made. Tall, handsome, engaged in a mental activity instead of the physical ones in which he so often participated—the ones that had shaped his well-formed muscles and broad shoulders. She wondered at how she had ever despised this man. But she hadn’t truly known him then.

  The warm breeze ruffled her skirts, drawing Lucas’s gaze from his book. The smile he sent her stirred her senses and made her want to rush into his arms. Instead, she forced her feet to take small, feminine steps. Lucas straightened and tucked the book under his arm.

  “To what do I owe the pleasure of this unexpected meeting?”

  Heather giggled. “You just saw me at luncheon, less than an hour ago.”

  He placed a hand over his heart. “But it seems as if years have passed.” “You goose.”

  He faked a wince. “Oh, the lady maligns me when, in fact, my heart doth take wing whene’er I see her. If that makes me a goose, then yes, I am one.” He bowed and pretended to tip a hat, which he wasn’t wearing. “Goose Reed at your service, miss.”

  Laughing, Heather shook her head and stared out at the beautiful river scene. Spanish moss hung from the trees, dancing in the breeze like fine lace on a lady’s gown. Moss covered the top of the water, making it a bright green. Though just midspring, countless flowers bloomed in the cultured garden.

  Lucas moved beside her, his shoulder touching hers. “It’s a lovely sight, is it not?”

  “Aye.” She nodded.

  He turned to face her and lifted his hand to her cheek.

  His eyes glowed with love—for her. She still had a hard time grasping that thought, with her coming from a Loyalist family and his being American patriots.<
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  “All of this pales in comparison to you.”

  Her breath caught in her throat.

  He smiled, making her stomach feel as if butterflies were doing a winged battle in it. “I thought my chance for love had passed me by, but then you and Jamie came into my life. How did I ever live without you?”

  Heather hated the doubt that crept in and spoiled the moment, but she still couldn’t help wondering if his love for her was tied to Jamie. He’d have never met her if not for the boy, yet she wanted him to love her for who she was, not because she brought his son to him. Until she knew for sure, she couldn’t allow him to kiss her again. She wouldn’t share her affections with any man but the one meant to be her husband. She forced herself to face the garden again. “I can see why you prefer to stay here instead of in Charleston.” He scowled. “You don’t like our Charleston home?”

  “What?” Her gaze darted to his. Had she offended him? “Aye, I do, but I so love the serenity here, and you don’t see your closest neighbors when you’re on your porch.”

  He chuckled. “There is that, though I do miss the ocean when I’m here.”

  “Your mother said you used to sail frequently but that you no longer do. Can I ask why not?”

  His jaw tightened, and all merriment fled. He remained silent so long that she thought he might not answer. “It’s not something I often talk about, but you’ll find out sooner or later if you remain here for long. I’d just as soon you heard the truth from me.”

  Heather turned to face him, concerned with the serious tone in his voice. Perhaps she shouldn’t have asked, but she longed to know everything about the man she was quickly growing to love.

  He pursed his lips and drew in a deep breath. “I do fear, though, that the fondness you’ve developed for me will flee when you learn the truth.”