The real truth was I wanted to leave to see Tommy. He was all I thought about the entire time I was being poked and prodded. I decided while my menagerie of friends were fighting amongst themselves, I’d get the ball rolling and sign the papers to leave.
As I turned, to my surprise, he was here. Tommy came to rescue me a second time that day, but disappointment very quickly set in when I saw the hurt on his face, as he stared at me and everyone around me. He turned to speak with some guy I’d never seen before, a doctor I think. Both men nodded and exited the other side of the waiting room through doors that led into the main area of the hospital. I was far too weak to go after him on my own, so I enlisted the help of my brother’s friend, who was an innocent bystander watching this shit show along with me.
He directed me toward the doors to leave. On our way out, I finally caught the attention of Blaze and blew her a kiss. She winked and gestured she’d call me tomorrow. With a brief nod, I concurred.
My brother’s old friend quickly whisked me off to my home and made sure I was settled before leaving.
Although, I knew Tommy was back at the hospital, not seeing his car in the driveway when we pulled up had my stomach falling, as an eerie numbness enveloped my body and my mind.
Who was that guy Tommy was with? Was he a friend? Tommy looked heartbroken. Why didn’t he come over? Why did he leave with that guy without a word? Maybe he wasn’t going to rent the house after all.
Getting ahold of my emotions and the questions my mind was forging, felt like an impossible task. I needed answers from Tommy, but he wasn’t there. He had to come home eventually, and if I was still awake, I’d face him then, but until that time came I came to the conclusion that stewing over my thoughts under a hot shower would be far better than sitting and brooding.
My shower went from practical…I was clean, to futile…I was soaked…drowning in thoughts…thoughts of him. That was it, I needed to dry off, throw on some sweats and tell him how I felt, there and then—before I chickened out.
Wait! What if he wasn’t home, yet? This was silly. He had to back by now.
Then again, it was early evening and like me, I’m sure he hadn't eaten. I took a deep breath in, got up my nerve, swiped my keys from the counter, and headed next door. Once down the stairs in the alley, I saw Tommy’s car was back in its normal parking spot. Relief washed over me, as I scaled his stairs quickly and knocked at his door.
I knocked several times, but no answer. His car was there. He had to be home. I then did what any irrational girl on a rational mission would do…I let myself in.
Slowly, I slid the screen shut behind me, careful not to allow it to jam. I called out to Tommy again, but still, there was nothing. Walking in further, I noticed the pictures and sketches Tommy had of his proposed renovations splattered across the massive island Jimmy had made to order years ago. Like second nature, I smoothed my hand over the aged and brittle surface of the driftwood, trying to reconnect with my past.
Remembering a moment Jimmy and I shared, what seemed like a lifetime ago…
“Babygirl, just don’t stand there doing nothing. Help me get the boxes in from the deck before the storm hits.” Jimmy struggled, lifting three boxes at once as he slammed into the screen door, taking it off its tracks and him off his balance.
All I could do was giggle.
“Nice, Jade… Are you going to help me or not?”
I rolled my eyes as I sat down on the floor, picking up his surfing magazines that were released from their cardboard confines as the boxes dropped open during his little mishap.
“I’m helping; I’m helping. You wouldn’t need my help if you just took one box at a time, Jimmy.”
“Unlike you, Jade, I don't have time to chase away the sun while I follow the moon.”
“Huh?”
Frustrated with my confusion, he plopped down to where I was kneeling, dumped the one box he remained holding to the side of him and ran his fingers through his long curly locks.
Grabbing my wrist and pulling me over, next to where he was seated, he wrapped his arms around me, kissed my forehead, and explained his definition of me chasing away the sun while following the moon.
“Jade, I love you more than…surfing.” His broad smile appeared as he tried to keep from laughing.
Shaking my head, I couldn’t keep from laughing either.
Smiling, my thoughts returned to the present…the laughter and voices faded like ghosts into the background. Jimmy was right… that statement—the definition of me never really hit home until this moment.
My eyes welled up and a familiar edginess came over me. I decided after the walk down memory lane, now was probably not a good time for me to talk with Tommy. I was about to leave when I heard a thud in the room above my head. Looking at the ceiling I waited for more.
Nothing.
I turned to go, then hesitated before turning back and heading up the stairs to the room where the noise came from. As I reached the second-floor landing, the hiss of steam became clearer. The sound I heard was more than likely him closing the old hollow door to the bathroom. Another item on the endless list of things neglected since the house was left to be sold.
Jade, stop stalling. Do what you came here to do.
The closer I inched my way to the door, the more apparent my apprehension became; I was at war with my attraction for this man, but I couldn’t turn away. I kept seeing Tommy’s face at the hospital. His hurt, his avoidance of me, probably due to the people around me. None of them were here now. I could do this. I could make this about him and me with no interruptions.
I took a deep breath, entered the bathroom, and softly padded across the cool tile until the shower door with Tommy behind it was close enough to touch. His blurred image barely moved. His arms outstretched against the inner walls as the water fell over his head and down his neck and back…confined in thoughts he hoped would wash away.
The thumping in my ears grew increasingly loud, reminding me, pushing me toward something I never expected to happen…to feel for someone so deeply who I barely knew, yet seemed like I’d known forever. With trembling breaths, I weakly knock on the door’s tin frame, startling the body behind it out of his trance. Multiple jiggling and jumbling occurred inside. A menacing crack echoed as it stiffly opened part way for him to peer out with my fist in mid-knock.
Retreating slightly, Tommy couldn't believe what he was seeing. It was written all over his face.
“Jade, wha-what are you doing here?”
I tried to think of something profound, something that would make sense.
Jade, the truth would be nice. Tell him the truth.
If only I knew the truth—I knew why I was standing here, but with everything I told myself now going out the window, I wasn’t sure how to explain my change of heart. Maybe I just needed to stop this, walk out and lock myself in my home…not answer the door should he follow me. I didn't want this to exist, but I couldn't stop how I felt every time I was near him. He was a magnet and I was the used scrap metal being pulled in—automatically attaching myself to him.
“Jade, is something wrong? Are you sick? Do you need me to call someone?” True to form, he was kind and always willing to help.
He continued speaking, but for some reason, I couldn’t understand what he was saying. The water pounded the walls; my thoughts were racing with questions. Maybe I didn't think this through? Again, did I turn and run and explain later the concussion caused my confusion, or did I do something for me and only for me for once in my damn fucked up life? It wasn’t something to make Viv proud of me, or to keep my parents satisfied, it wasn’t for Blaze or Reece or Kim or even Damien, but for me.
My throat tightened, dried up, and swelled. It was almost impossible to speak. Swallowing was a chore, words to give him seemed unattainable, but then, out of nowhere what gutted me spilled out along with my tears.
“I don't know,” I barely squeaked through a whisper, not looking his way.
“
Jade?”
His voice called to me. Swiftly, my eyes looked up as my tears rolled down with my simple world crashing around me. The world where I didn't need nor want a man in my life. Now, three years after Damien, three years after Jimmy’s death, Tommy barely walked into a small part of that world…the beach house my brother called home. Where old memories and new emotions were unleashed. Ones I wanted to deny, ones I didn't want to feel. I could be on my own, an already successful businesswoman enjoying the sandy universe around me without the complication of a relationship. Yet, this man by his presence, his gestures…his unexplainable ability to do nothing, and still draw me to him was making me rethink everything I wanted or thought I wanted.
“I don't know, Tommy. I don't know why. Does there always have to be a fucking reason? A typical answer? Does there? I had to see you…that’s all!” I paused to steady myself, which was virtually impossible. “Shit… that’s not all. I know I’m not making sense… and no, it’s not this damn concussion.” I stopped.
“Hand me that towel next to you.” He directed from behind the blurred door.
Looking around to the left and right of me, I found the large beach towel he was referring to and gave it to him. After a second or two, the water stopped and a bit of fumbling with the door and the towel occurred before he appeared in front of me. His dark locks randomly falling on his face. His chest still covered in droplets of water that trailed down to where the towel settled low on his hips covering the intimate parts of him he modestly kept hidden.
Our bodies close, yet not touching until he touched me. His hands cradled my face, his thumbs skimmed my cheeks, his eyes studying me, pondering and examining me as he tried to read what was inside without asking, without pushing. Holding his questions back, his powerful jawline visibly tightened, making my heart race. Together, our breaths were a measurable force between us, a force present from the beginning whether we recognized it or not, engulfing the room with an energy, a passion that neither one of us could deny.
After what seemed like a long calculated breath, Tommy spoke softly and held out his hand.
“Come with me.”
Tommy
THE LAST THING I expected to find was Jade at my door, let alone—my shower door. Barely dressed, wondering what was going on, and concerned with her demeanor tonight, I did the only thing I could do…
I took her to bed.
Not where I normally slept as I remembered Viv explaining the upstairs bedrooms were once occupied by Jade and her brother as children and eventually Jimmy as an adult. I didn't think to spend the night with her in a room where her brother slept before his accident was a good idea, so with a firm grip of her hand, I guided her back downstairs to the master turned guest room on the first floor.
We reached the kitchen island when Jade pulled back, dug in her heels, and demanded an explanation.
“Wait. Where are you taking me?”
With a coy grin, I simply told her, “To bed.” Without giving her a chance to speak, I turned away and pulled her along once more until we reached the main floor bedroom. Still holding onto her, I lifted the comforter with my free hand and tipped my head to motion her in. More than a bit of annoyance and confusion played on her face. Her hand slipped out of mine, as she did what she was told.
“Now…how’s your headache?” Asking with arms crossed trying to look as controlled as one could when wearing only a towel.
“What?” She leaned forward, her lips parted, not believing any of this.
“I said, how’s your headache?”
“It hurts, but it’s not something I can't handle.”
“If it worsens…”
“I know; I know. Don't worry, I’ll follow doctor’s orders,” She whined, cutting me off and avoiding the question she really wanted to ask, but I answered without her prompting.
“You’re probably wondering what we’re doing here in this room and what you just said is exactly why. You have a concussion and you're supposed to be resting through the weekend, but instead…” She finished my sentence.
“…I’m here with you.” Her sweetness softened me.
“Yeah.”
“Okay, now I have a question.”
“Which is?”
“How did you know I had a concussion? I mean I just got home. Who told you?”
“I have my ways,” I stated proudly.
“Which are?”
“I told the charge nurse at the desk I was your fiancé,” I reluctantly confessed.
A giggle with a gasp escaped Jade’s lips as she sat back studying me.
“What? Why is that so funny?”
“You told the nurse we were engaged? Don't you think that’s a bit over the top? I mean all you had to do was ask me once I got back from the hospital.”
“No more over the top than announcing to your friends at dinner that we were dating, especially since we had only met the night before,” I stated, as to justify my behavior.
“Fair enough, but neither of us knew who the other one was on that dance floor.”
“That’s true, but the next morning you knew who I was and you still proceeded to tell everyone we were a couple that night at the dinner table,” I teased, and she became miffed.
“I didn't see you complaining.” She plopped back on the pillow, arms crossed, justifying her actions, yet a bit sullen…defeated.
“Jade, listen, I want you to stay here for the night. I’m not talking about sleeping with me. I’m talking about me making sure your concussion stays a minor one. It wasn't my intention to upset you. I hope you understand that?” Jade’s face fell slightly.
Did I miss something? Did she want us to sleep together?
Compelled to figure her out, know her and get closer to her, I subtly sat next to her and placed my hand over hers. Jade stayed, no flinching or jumping or pulling away. It told me she was at least willing to listen and hopefully willing to stay the night after what I was about to say.
Staring at our connection and squeezing firmly, I began.
“I want you to know I’ve heard everything you've said from the very beginning. I know you're not looking to get seriously involved at the moment and that you're not sure if you ever will, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn't attracted to you. I think you’ve figured that out by now. I enjoy being around you and if that means friends, then so be it, but as a friend, I’m not going to stand by and not make certain you're okay after the incident you had on the water today. I can’t, so don’t ask me to.”
I wondered if she’d thought I was overly intrusive. After all, we didn't know each other very long. I couldn’t explain it, but I felt connected to her from the beginning, and with her being hurt I wanted her here, where I could watch her…care for her, even if that meant no strings attached…I could be okay with that. At least I thought I could.
I stared at our hands. Hell, I looked everywhere but at Jade herself. She must have thought I was a fool. First, my plan to move here and now tonight out of nowhere basically dragging her into the bedroom and ordering her into bed like a child.
What was I thinking?
I was about to apologize for my behavior when Jade did the unimaginable. She let go of my hand, climbed forward, placed a kiss on my cheek, and sat by my side on the edge of the bed.
“You’re sweet, Tommy.” She smiled, but it was slightly forced.
“What do you say? Will you stay tonight? You shouldn't be alone with a concussion.”
She continued to smile and nodded.
“Can I get you anything? I’m sure you haven't eaten.”
“I’m not really hungry, but I’d love a cup of tea. If it’s not too much trouble.”
“It’s no trouble at all. I’ll be right back.”
“Tommy, wait… I’d rather stay out on the couch, if that’s okay with you?”
I was perplexed, but whatever she wanted was fine. I put the water on and excused myself to trade my beach towel for a decent pair of sweats and a T-shirt.
When I returned, Jade had made herself at home by curling into one corner of the sectional and taking the large throw from the back of the sofa and placing it over her. She settled in and perused the lack of progress I made on the living room/dining room area.
“I know…go on say it.”
“Say what?”
“How unfinished this room is.”
“Why would I say that?”
“Because it’s true?”
“You can’t be serious? You haven't lived here long enough to complete a tenth of what needs to be done. Remember, I know what shape or lack thereof this place was in.”
“I appreciate that. It means a lot coming from you. Thanks.” Her words and my relief brought a smile to my face.
“You don’t have to thank me. I understand.”
I wanted to kiss her, but instead, I made small talk.
“Would you like to see some of the plans and changes I’m thinking of making? I’d love your opinion.”
Jade nodded, as I handed her the tea and went to retrieve some of the photographs I took and magazine clippings I saved to give her an idea of where I was going with the renovations. After gathering the items I needed, I returned to find Jade asleep where I left her. It was a long day for both of us. I kissed Jade’s forehead, making sure not to wake her. For me, I settled in the guest room downstairs; in case any issues arose in the middle of the night.
It wasn't long before I heard what I thought was a small whimper. I listened further, my head cloudy and in sleep mode; I dismissed it. What came next I couldn't dismiss.
“No, no, no, Jimmy…why…no…no!” Jade’s anguish echoed through the house and engulfed me. Frantically running to her, she was up, awake, sweating, and holding her head.
“Jade, Jade…what’s wrong?” Fear’s ugliness crept through my body, questions swirled in my head as I sat down to take her close.
Had I caused this? I should have let her be.
Jade’s breathing rattled, her body trembling…physically and emotionally she was weakening before my eyes. I had to do something. I did cause this by insisting she stay.
Within Six Months (A Wild Roses Novel Book 1) Page 20