If my pacing continued, I was guaranteed my new floors would be aged before their time. I had to do something.
Calling Daniel seemed like the logical choice, but me not being logical or rational at the moment, I called Rain instead.
“Tommy!” She picked up and her voice took the edge off but didn't calm me as I thought it would.
“Hey, baby…how’s everything?”
“I’m good, but maybe I should be asking you that question?” With Rain’s inquisitive emphasis on the word you…pertaining to me, couldn't possibly mean she knew I lied. Could it?
“What do you mean?” I tried being as nonchalant as possible…more like playing stupid.
“What I mean is, you must be having a great time. I haven't heard from you in almost three weeks. So, tell me…who is she?” I could hear Rain’s inquisitive, playful grin forming on this side of the phone.
I should have known calling Rain and trying to put anything passed her was a mistake. She always knew what was going on with me, even if I never said a word. This time, I had to try my best to avoid this line of questioning. I wasn't ready to discuss Jade and what I was feeling for her with my best friend just yet, so I lied.
"Rain, if there was a she, believe me, you’d be the first to know. So tell me, how are the twins and Kane?"
“Nice try, but you're up to something, and you know I’ll find out eventually, and if you've been keeping things from me…” That was the Rain I knew and loved all these years. The fiery, take no prisoners attitude.
I laughed as she knew her idle threats didn't work on me.
“You’ll what? You know you can’t pull that shit with me. Listen, baby, you knew I had to get away, and I’m doing that. It’s not all it’s cracked up to be…finding myself, that is. But, Rain, I have to do this for me. Please understand.”
“Damn it, Tommy, I know. I know you had to do this. I get it. Probably more than anyone, but I don't like to think of you as hurting. That wasn't what this trip of self-realization should be about. Now, promise me something.”
“Okay, I promise.” I didn't even have to think about my answer when it came to Rain. That’s how it always had been with us.
“Promise me that whatever is going on with you, if it becomes too much, or if you just need a break from the reality you're searching for, you’ll come home.”
“You don't need me to promise that, Rain. You know I will. Just like I would if you said you needed me. That’s how fast I’d get there.”
“I love you, Tommy.” She comforted and cut me at the same time. I shouldn't have called in the state of mind I was in, yet it brought me clarity.
“I love you. I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“Yeah, please call me tomorrow. I have to talk to you about a call I received from a client the other day. I need your input.”
As Rain and I ended our call, I dismissed any business we needed to take on for another time, and decided to head over to the hospital, even though I said I would wait for Jade’s call at home…a promise I couldn’t keep.
I arrived at the medical center and searched for parking near the emergency room, but it was packed. That worried me further. What if Jade didn't get seen quickly enough and the injury she sustained was worse than we originally thought? I needed to see her. A renewed surge of energy hit me. I slammed the car into reverse to find a place to park—I needed to get to her. I finally found a spot on the other side of the building and furiously ran around to where I had just come from, barely skimming through the opening of the electric doors which presented a flood of people, confirming it was a busy night.
Peering over and around the crowd in the waiting room proved fruitless. Jade and her friends didn’t appear to be in sight. Hoping this meant she was already taken in to be examined, I inquired at the nurse’s station.
“Excuse me, nurse?”
“Yes, sir. How can I help you?”
“I’m looking for a friend that came in tonight.”
“I’m sorry, sir. We aren't allowed to give out information of that nature…HIPPA regulations.”
“I’m not asking you to give out information on her condition. I just want to know she's here and that I can be with her,” I persisted.
“And how are you related to the patient?”
I had to think fast. “I’m her fiancé.” Desperate measures, I know, but I said it anyway. I wasn't leaving here without seeing her.
“Let me check to see if she’s here, and if she is I can get someone to clear it with her or another family member, then I’ll bring you in.”
“Thank you. I appreciate it”
“Don’t thank me yet. We’re overwhelmed and understaffed tonight— this could take some time.”
“I understand.”
“What’s your girlfriend’s name?”
“Jade Stanton.”
“What was she brought in for?”
“She was hit in the head while surfing.”
“I see. Was she brought in by a family member or by ambulance?”
“She was brought here by some close friends.”
“Okay, let me put this request in the system and as soon as I know anything, either way, I’ll page you overhead.”
“Thank you, again.”
“Don’t mention it. Have a seat over there until you hear from me.”
I did as she instructed and took a seat at the back of the waiting room where there were fewer people milling around. She wasn’t kidding when she said it would be awhile. More like three hours. During which I checked the phone numerous times with no response from Jade, Blaze, or Kim… and no page overhead with my name attached it.
I saw familiar faces emerge from the swinging doors connected to the ER triage section. They were smiling and even laughing when I realized that the last one out and in a wheelchair, was Jade. The minute the wheels hit the public waiting room she shot out of the chair like a bullet.
I was about to walk over when a dark shadow bypassed me and approached the crowd.
It was Montgomery and Damien. I should've known that bastard would take every opportunity to bring his son closer to Jade. The problem was I had no say in the matter. I wasn't really Jade’s fiancé or boyfriend. I wasn’t even family. I was a guy that knew her a mere week…that was it. I was nothing. All I could do was watch as Damien approached her…skimming his thumb across her cheek, getting close enough to kiss her, as his snake of a father looked on with sheer satisfaction and pride.
My fingers cut across my scalp as a reminder of what little sanity I had left after watching someone else touch her. I wanted her. I knew this. Who was I kidding? I wanted her from the beginning. I wasn’t playing along with her masquerade. I wasn't acting. I was hoping somewhere deep inside that she’d notice… she’d want it too.
Now, I was done playing games. I was done with the charade. It was time to tell her the truth. Stop the bullshit and be real. She had hints of it from earlier today, but I was skirting around it. That was never me and it never would be. It was time to tell her that I wanted to get to know her better and be more than friends and neighbors. Fuck the plan. To hell with it. I didn't care if it took six months, six years, or six lifetimes. I wanted Jade to be mine. Fuck trying to change. I said I didn't want to pick up the pieces of anyone else’s life, yet I would do it forever if she’d just notice me…I would do it forever for her. I needed to do it now, with this anger toward Montgomery inside me. I needed to get Jade and bring her home.
I made my move, weaving my way through a confusion of nurses, doctors, hospital staff, and loved ones until a hand gripped my shoulder from behind.
“Tommy, I thought that was you. Are you all right? What are you doing here?” A familiar face in a white lab coat greeted me.
“Hey, Dr. Roth, how are you?”
“I’m good, Tommy, but you didn't answer my question. Is everything okay?”
“Yes, yes, I’m fine, just here visiting a friend who was brought in tonight,” I explained, as I torque
d my neck to see if Jade and her group were still there.
They were. Blaze was explaining everything to Reece and Damien. Kim and Jade’s lifeguard friend were talking, and Jade was seated at the desk observing them. Come to think of it, she appeared almost lost. As if she had walked into a party, but was the only one in the room. I saw Jade tonight as if I was seeing her for the first time—seeing inside of her for the first time. Putting on a good front, while sadness peeked through giving little inklings of isolation. The funny thing was that no one around her seemed to realize what was going on. They were either in their own worlds or too busy trying to insinuate themselves into hers with their own agendas. Telling her it was time to move on, but never listening to what she wanted. Blaze, for the most part, wanted her to move forward, but she was too busy trying to reign Montgomery in than to see what Jade was going through. All she saw was that Jade was being released and tomorrow, normalcy would begin again. Yet, Jade’s life was anything but normal. Viv was the only one around her who understood what she had gone through and the only one to notice, but she was away for the weekend.
Tonight, I noticed.
“Tommy? Have you heard a word I said?”
Unfortunately, all I could do was watch Jade. Everything else was muted.
“Doc, I’m sorry. I’ve got a lot on my mind. You were saying?”
“I said, is there anything I can do for your friend while I’m here?”
I was about to explain when my name was being called over the speaker. I excused myself, telling Dr. Roth that it was great seeing him once again. Then I quickly went to the front desk, but instinct must have served him well, as Dr. Roth went with me.
The nurse explained she located my fiancé and her file, but I wasn't on the list of close relatives, so if I wanted to know about her condition I needed to contact them.
“Tommy, I just spoke with Rain and Dominick the other day, and neither one of them mentioned you were engaged. Congratulations!”
He held out his hand, but pulled it back stiffly, when he noticed I didn’t extend mine, or it could have been when he saw the tight-lipped grimace of frustration combined with embarrassment on my face.
“Now, for someone to look like you do, tells me there’s more to this story than meets the eye. Let’s go to my office.”
I nodded and reluctantly followed him, not wanting to leave Jade, but I knew with the Montgomery men there, I didn’t stand a chance of getting close to her without causing undue stress.
“Tell me what’s going on, Tommy.”
Frustration growled through an elongated release of air I wasn't aware I was holding.
Sitting back in the chair, another wave of forced air emanated out from my tense body.
“Doc, it’s a long story.”
He smirked, as he looked at his watch. “You’re in luck. I’m off the clock as of now and my patients tell me I’m a great listener.”
Able to give him a crooked smile, I stood and paced and explained everything. He listened, just as he had said.
“For some time, I haven’t been myself. Since Rain and Dominick married…no, no, since they had gotten together, I started to question myself, my life, and everything around me. I decided to stop the internal whining and do something about it. That’s when I had the idea of moving down here, buying a house, and starting a family. So, for the next six months, I was going to do exactly that. My family and friends, except for Daniel, think I’m traveling—finding myself. I bought the house and the pieces started to fall into place.”
“Until?”
“Until I met Jade.”
“But.”
“But, she’s not looking for a relationship.” I couldn’t bring myself to elaborate. The thought of not being with her or explaining why gutted me.
“Well, Tommy that was some story but it seems to me you know what you want, and you know what you're dealing with. I remember Jade’s brother from the local papers some years back. Surfing hero, all-star athlete, great head for business, good-looking guy who had it all, but I also remember when he died the local paper didn't portray his death a suicide.”
“But Doc…”
He stopped me and continued.
“I know exactly what you're going to say. They twisted it just enough to call it a surfing accident. You have to understand the family lived here full-time for a very long time. This is their home, but this island is small. People talk. To keep the chatter down, I’m sure Jade’s father, Jim and Viv, as well as Reece Montgomery, had enough pull to prevent Jimmy Stanton’s death from becoming a scandal. Don’t get me wrong, people knew the truth back then and many still talked, but it was easier than if it had become front page news, and with time it faded away.”
“Life goes on.”
“Yes, Tommy, it does.”
“Thanks, Doc.”
“But I didn't do anything.”
“You did more than you think. Can I ask you for a favor?”
“Sure.”
“Can you direct me out of here without passing through the ER? I need to get home before Jade does.”
He smiled and nodded. “Right this way.”
I returned home to see that Jade had beat me there. I looked at the phone. The one she had given to me earlier…nothing. Climbing the stairs, muffled voices from Jade’s home became louder but still unrecognizable. At this point, I knew she was with her friends, and she was safe, so I let her be. Tomorrow, I would drop by to check in on her and give her back the phone.
Tonight, I decided a hot shower would help to wash off the remnants of the anger, frustration, and confusion of the day that remained trapped between my muscles. Morning would be here soon enough.
Jade
SUMMER ON LBI was supposed to manifest feelings of paradise…long walks along the shoreline, parties with friends, lying under a seasonally planted King Palm, or basking, not burning, in orange, lemon and tangerine hues. Then real life sets in and snaps you out of your fantasy when you’re slammed in the head with a longboard because some drunk novice thought he owned the surf.
Maybe I needed to get knocked in the head to finally wake up? To make myself realize playing it safe in life wasn’t worth everything I was missing out on…Yet, I was having trouble focusing on me at the moment, because the worst part of my day wasn’t walking away with a minor concussion and the traditional headache that followed. The pain from the blow to my head would be annoying, but I’d live.
Unfortunately, the blow to my privacy every time Blaze decided to inform that man she was sleeping with of her whereabouts, was far more painful. I couldn’t believe her. This woman, who has been my best friend forever, who I thought I knew as well as I knew myself, was now bending over backward for that Neanderthal of a man, Reece Montgomery.
Not only did he make an annoying appearance back at the house earlier today when he undoubtedly knew he wasn’t invited, but he’s here with Damien, causing my head to throb from his constant verbal assaults on my personal life. He doesn’t have to do or say anything. His breathing alone annoyed the shit out of me.
His presence caused me to go into a tailspin, but couple that with the fact that his son was fawning all over me as if I’d had a near-death experience, was completely laughable, especially when he couldn’t care less where I was or what I was doing, when he fucked another girl in our bed.
“Jade, Blaze called and said you were hurt?” His hand framed my face, as his thumb slithered across my skin.
I tilted away from his attention, and silently chastised Blaze for the call.
“Sorry,” Blaze cringed.
“Well, as long as you're okay, that’s all that matters,” Damien said.
“Of course, she’s okay. You must be, especially since that inconsiderate man you're sleeping with isn’t here to support you. You must be perfectly fine, with him missing at a time like this, where he should be here, caring for you.” Reece raised his voice and surveyed the walls, the ceiling, and the room like the stage actor he was.
/> “Jade has been through enough for one day. Could you please let it lie?” Blaze tried as she might to thwart the encounter and the fight that was about to ensue between Reece and me.
To her dismay, she failed, but I wouldn’t.
“Listen to me, you piece of shit. I asked Tommy to stay behind and make sure if Viv called or came home from her trip early, he could inform her of the mishap out on the water, and let her know I was fine and not to worry. Now, I suggest you back off with your snide and unwanted observations.”
“Dad, let’s go. Blaze is right; Jade’s been through enough today. Your personal remarks aren’t helping.”
“You see, Damien, that’s where you're wrong. You can't read Jade the way I can. You couldn't when you dated her, and that’s precisely why you lost her. I, on the other hand, can read her. She needs our help. She’s involved with a man who’s not in her league. An insignificant matter of infatuation, but one that is standing in the way of your happiness with Jade and vice versa. One I intend to rectify before Jade is hurt any further.”
“Listen, old man, I came here with you to make sure Jade wasn't hurt. Now that we know it’s a concussion and the girls are with her, we need to go,” Damien snarled as he walked away from his father; his impatience and anger grew with each passing minute.
Of course, it didn’t stop Reece from continuing his banter.
“Damien, please tell me where you think you're going? Back to my house? To that waste of time you're bedding down?”
I was sore, and although there was very little left emotionally between Damien and me, it was time to shut Reece up, not in the hopes of protecting his son, but to protect my wavering mental health. I was about to confront him when fate stepped in.
Arguments unleashed themselves, insults were strewn across the ER waiting area in every direction from all parties involved—all except me. No one could hear me; no one would listen. I needed to escape the madness and leave them to their own devices.
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