by Burke, Dez
He grins at me and I can’t help giggling like the teenager I once was.
“There’s no way I can drink a gallon of beer,” I say. “Or even half a gallon.”
“I’m sorry, Annie,” he says, his tone turning serious. “I didn’t realize this place hadn’t changed or updated at all. I’m sure I could’ve chosen a fancier place to take you. Or is this the only bar in town? Seriously, who comes into a bar and orders a gallon of beer?”
I tilt my head discreetly toward the table beside us. A group of men who have just gotten off work are sitting there with not one, but two gallons of draft beer on the table and a huge bowl of peanuts in the shell.
“How about we start with a single glass of beer?” I suggest. I dig around in my purse and pull out my driver’s license. “See, I brought a real ID this time in case they card me. In fact, I might demand that they check my photo to prove we’re legal now. Especially after all the trouble they put us through when we were kids.”
“Sounds good to me,” he says.
I put down the menu and catch Levi’s eye. “I’m glad you asked me to meet you tonight. It’s been forever.”
“Too long,” he agrees. “I can’t count the number of people I’ve lost touch with since I went off to Nashville. I regret losing touch with them, but I’ve thought about you the most.”
He’s gazing at me intently. Those green eyes are fixed on mine and I find it impossible to drag my eyes away. It leaves me momentarily breathless and my mouth grows dry.
I run my tongue over my lips and am relieved when a waiter comes to take our order. He’s a young man in his early twenties. He glances at Levi and clearly doesn’t recognize him. Probably not a country music fan and thinks Levi is just another local in for a beer.
“We’ll have a couple of glasses of draft beer,” Levi says, throwing me a wink. “Do you need to see our IDs? Let me get mine out of my wallet.”
“No sir,” the waiter says, giving him a bored glance. “You’re fine.”
“Well, that’s a huge disappointment,” Levi says with a grin. “You might as well put your driver’s license away then, Annie.”
“I’ll be right back with your drink order,” the waiter says before gathering up our menus and leaving us alone.
“Did that feel a little anti-climactic to you, or is it just me?” Levi jokes. “All that time we spent trying to sneak in here, and all we needed to do was grow older. Damn…that was a pathetic and sad waste of time.”
“I’m sure we spent a lot of time on things that weren’t important way back then,” I say.
“Funny, I don’t remember it that way,” he says, growing serious. “Every minute seemed important at the time. Those were good days.”
“They sure were. The best. How does it feel being back in Monroe after being gone for so long?”
“Weird. It’s so small and old-fashioned. Everyone knows each other here. It’s taking me a little bit of getting used to it again. Monroe is completely different from Nashville.”
“Tell me about it,” I say. “Would you believe I’ve never been to Nashville? I kept thinking it would be fun to spend a weekend there, but I never had the chance. What is Nashville like?”
Levi’s eyes light up and he leans forward on the table with his elbows. A smile plays on his face as he talks about Music City.
“Nashville is something else. Broad Street is my favorite place to be. There are lights everywhere. When it gets dark, the streets are lit up with blinking neon. It makes you feel as if you’re living in a music video. When it rains, all those pretty lights reflect against the water. It’s easy to get dazzled by them and by the dream of making it big.”
“It sounds nice,” I say.
“When you walk down the street, all you can hear is music coming out of the open doorways. Every bar has an artist, every night there’s a concert. There are tons of tourists. Never the same crowd twice. Things happen there. Don’t get me started on the food scene.”
He shuts his eyes and takes in a deep breath like he can taste the flavors.
“Every type of food under the sun: Southern, barbeque, street food. You can try something different on every block. Each day you wake up feeling like you’re in a new city. It’s always evolving.”
Not like Monroe.
“You must love it there,” I say.
“I do,” Levi says, “but I’m not there all that often. Since I’ve started touring, I live most of my life on a bus and in hotel rooms. Don’t get me wrong, it’s fun, but I never feel at home with a place to call my own. I’m nothing more than a wandering nomad.”
“I thought Cole said you’d just bought a mansion?”
Levi chuckles and leans back in his chair.
“A crazy attempt of mine to feel as if I had a house I could call home. It’s too much, though. It’s under construction right now and I haven’t spent much time there. It needs something more for me to call it a real home. I don’t even have a dog, which pisses me off. I miss having someone or something to come home to.”
Our beers arrive and Levi takes a deep swig of his.
“At least it’s a good investment,” he continues. “Harry’s always telling me to invest in real estate.”
“Harry?”
“My manager. He’s the one who discovered me. I was playing at a dive bar on Broad Street. Barely big enough to fit twenty people inside. More of a backroom closet than a real bar. He heard me at the open microphone night and gave me his card. I didn’t think much of it but followed it up anyway. Turns out Harry’s one of the best in country music. He was able to get me signed with a label within a month; the album recorded within a year.”
“That doesn’t surprise me. I remember when I first heard you sing on the radio.”
“Did you recognize my voice?” he asks.
“Of course I did,” I reply. “For some reason, it shocked me. When the song came on, I had to pull my car off the road to listen to it.”
“Why?”
“There were so many happy tears for you rolling down my cheeks that I couldn’t see to drive,” I tell him. “You’d made it to the big time. I was so happy for you.”
“Enough talk about me,” Levi says, changing the subject. “How was college?”
“Not that exciting,” I reply. “Each year seemed to get progressively harder. You might remember how much time I spent studying the first semester.”
“I do,” he says. “You always kept a textbook in your hands. Every spare minute you were studying or writing essays.”
We both grow quiet for a moment, remembering the last few months we tried to hang onto our relationship when I went off to college and Levi to Nashville.
“I always knew you were super smart,” he says. “How do you like being a pharmacist? Is it everything you thought it would be?”
“Call me lame, but I love it. I love all of it, from doing the math to running inventory. But, most of all, I love working with people. I see the same customers week in, week out.” I lean forward with a conspiring grin. “I’m the eyes and ears of this town. People tell me things. Secret things.”
Levi lets out a laugh. “Whoa, I’d better watch out then.”
“You can tell me your secrets,” I tease. “They’re safe with me. I’m the town confidant.”
He leans forward. Throughout the conversation, our bodies have grown closer and closer across the table. I can blame it on the fact that the band is playing loudly, and we can’t hear each other speak, but I think we both simply want to be more intimate.
“I told you a few of my secrets back in the day, as I recall. My crazy dream of wanting to be a country music star for one.”
“Yes, you did. Many, many times. That’s all you talked about the last few months we were together.”
The candlelight flickers across his features and I can’t keep my eyes from wandering over his closely-shaven beard, strong jaw, and then back up to his gorgeous eyes. My hands itch to reach over and rub my knuckles against h
is soft beard. To see how it feels underneath my fingertips.
The background music is soft, and that half glass of cheap draft beer has gone to my head. The bubbles are warm and dancing inside me. I’m lighter than air staring into Levi’s eyes.
“That last summer we had together was amazing,” he begins. “Do you remember when—”
“Excuse me. Aren’t you Levi Hamby?”
We’re rudely interrupted by a pair of young women who can’t be more than twenty-two years old. They’re holding onto each other’s arms with giddy excitement, obviously having dared each other to approach Levi.
My heart drops in disappointment.
He offers me an apologetic smile, then flashes a warm grin towards the two women. “I am,” he says.
“Oh my god, we love you! Can we please get your autograph?”
“Sure.”
Levi pulls out a pen from his shirt pocket to sign the girls’ napkins. I wait patiently for him to exchange a few words with them and take a couple of photos before they leave.
“Sorry about that, Annie.”
I hold up my hands and wave it off. “It’s okay. Part of the job.”
“Anyway, what I was saying…”
“Sorry to bother you, sir. I mean, Mr. Hamby. Could we get a quick photo? My Mama absolutely adores you. She’d kill me if I didn’t get a photo. This will make her day.”
Another female has spotted us.
“Of course,” he replies.
An excited buzz is rapidly spreading through the bar. As soon as the customers realized there was someone signing autographs, they figured out immediately who it was.
Their very own small-town hero, Levi Hamby.
All around me, I hear the scrape of wooden chair legs being pulled back against the hardwood floor as people stand to join the crowd swarming Levi.
He tries to urge them to move along, but he’s too polite to firmly ask them to leave. I wait for ten minutes, then fifteen.
People start moving in closer and jostling around me. Elbows and purses whack me in the back of the head as people press closer to the table trying to reach Levi.
A girl leans over my shoulder and her purse hits my mug, almost knocking it over and spilling my beer. I grab it just in time.
I’ve never been one to enjoy crowds, and this is a little too much for me. I lean closer and touch Levi’s arm to get his attention.
“I’m going outside for a minute to get some air. I’ll be back in a little bit. Take your time.”
He nods and starts to say something when another fan sticks a napkin in front of him to sign.
I walk away and exit the bar without a backwards glance. Tears well up in my eyes. I tell myself that I’m stupid for getting upset. I’m not mad at Levi, only disappointed that our evening was interrupted.
I know I shouldn’t be irritated because Levi is a celebrity now. Signing autographs comes with the territory.
And after all, this isn’t a real date. We were only catching up on Monroe gossip.
The truth is I felt invisible once the fans spotted Levi.
When he walks into a room now, the whole world comes to a standstill. When I leave the room, nobody notices I’m gone.
No matter what we were to each other at one time, it’s obvious we’re worlds apart now.
15
Levi
“Thank you everyone for your continued support,” I say to the crowd gathered around my table. “I’m sorry, but I need to leave. Please don’t forget to support your local artists too.” I gesture to the band who is trying to play up on the raised stage through the chaos.
I give the lead singer an apologetic nod for stealing the focus from their performance. I’ve been enough of a jerk already.
There are murmurs of disappointment as I stand and push my chair back under the table.
“Can’t you do one more autograph?” a woman pleads.
I hold up my hands. “Sorry,” I say. “I’ve got to run.”
I’ve been down that road before. One becomes a hundred and then they call their friends. The next thing I know it’ll be three o’clock in the morning and a crowd will be lined out the door. I’ve learned to set limits if I can.
Right now, all I want to do is find Annie.
After throwing a couple of large bills down on the table, I slowly make my way past the crowd to the exit.
It’s a balmy night outside, humid without much of a breeze. I rush out the front door, then glance up and down the dark street. I’m worried that Annie has gone home, and I wouldn’t blame her if she did.
A wave of relief washes over me when I spot her. She’s leaning against the corner of the building with her arms crossed, her back to me.
I walk up behind her and lightly rest my hand on her shoulder. She quickly turns around. She’s a vision of loveliness in her white dress and long blonde hair. I fight back an urge to pull her close to see if her body still fits perfectly within the circle of my arms the way she used to.
She forces a tight smile when she sees me.
“I’m sorry about all that,” I say. “Fans can get a little pushy sometimes. It’s hard to go anywhere without being interrupted these days.”
She rests a forgiving hand on my forearm. “It’s not your fault. You need to make time for your fans. They’re the ones who keep you in business. Without them, you wouldn’t be a star.”
“That’s all true, but tonight, I’m here for you.”
A small smile appears at the edge of her lips. She lets out a long breath in resignation. “I was thinking that maybe I should go on home and let you do your thing,” she says. “Everyone’s excited to see you, and I get that. You’re a big deal in this town whether you realize it or not. What you did back there made their night.”
I slide my fingers down her arm to her hand and close my fingers around hers.
“Well, the only one I’m excited to see is you. The fans will still be there tomorrow.”
“I was excited to see you, too,” she says, her fingers tightening around mine.
“I feel guilty that I let my fans put a damper on our night. Are you okay? I noticed that one of the women almost knocked over your beer.”
She lets out a long breath. “I swear, I don’t know how you do it. Don’t you find it all a bit overwhelming?”
“I used to, but it’s something that becomes the norm pretty quickly. Sign an autograph, pose for a photo, and repeat. Over and over.”
“How do you get anything done without a constant mob of fans bothering you?” she asks. “How do you grocery shop or go out to a movie?”
“I barely leave my hotel or tour bus between shows,” I tell her with a hollow laugh. “To be honest, it’s been a relief to be back in Monroe where I can grab a second to breathe. Until fifteen minutes ago, I felt almost the same as a normal person again. It felt damn good too. I liked it.”
“I bet that’s tough,” she says. “People want to be famous but never think about what being in the public eye is all about. Are the fans the same wherever you go?”
I lean back against the wall of the building and fold my arms across my chest, mirroring her pose.
“Worse,” I tell her. “The fans in the bar here are local people and polite. Some fans aren’t and many have no idea of social boundaries. They’ll interrupt me if I’m in the middle of a meal at a restaurant or on the phone. They don’t care. Airports and airplanes are the worst because I’m trapped with nowhere to run. When I’m by myself, it’s not a problem. Tonight, with you, it was. At least the paparazzi isn’t on my tail here. For the time being anyway. That’s something to be thankful for at least.”
“Does the press bother you a lot?”
“It’s been constant since the tour. It’s good for raising my profile, but a nightmare for my personal life. They’re always slinking around trying to take a photograph to sell to the gossip magazines. Or even worse, to shoot a video to sell to a celebrity gossip television show. I’m always glancing back over my s
houlder for a camera lens and rushing to my car.”
“I don’t think I could ever get used to the life of a celebrity,” she says, shaking her head slowly. “I can’t imagine living a life where everyone knows your name.”
I burst out laughing and spread my arms wide toward Main Street.
“What do you mean? You just described the daily life here in Monroe. You can’t get away with anything in this town without everyone knowing about it. Everyone in this town knows your name now that you’re the local pharmacist.”
Annie grins back. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’ve never thought about it that way.” She turns her head to stare at me. “It’s hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that we used to be a couple. We’re so different now. Living in two completely opposite worlds.”
“No, I don’t agree. How are we different?”
She raises her eyebrows. “You need to ask? You’re a massive superstar with the world at your feet, and I’m a small-town pharmacist. You travel the world surrounded by crowds of fans; I stay in one place making sure all the old folks get their cholesterol medicine.”
“You should stop selling yourself short,” I say. “The way I see it is that I wanted to be a musician, you wanted to be a pharmacist, and we’ve both achieved our dreams. In my way of thinking, that makes us pretty much the same.”
I reach out and brush back Annie’s hair from her face. It’s in a thick wave, hiding her face from view when she returns her gaze to the ground.
“Besides,” I continue, “you’re giving me too much credit. I’m not as famous as it seems. As you say, Monroe is a small town, and it’s easy to be a big fish here in a small pond. In the music industry, I’m still small fry. Nothing but a tiny minnow in the grand scale of the music business.”
“We both know that’s not true,” she says. “You’re a sensation selling out huge arenas, and you’ve only just begun. You’re on fire, Levi. I read that exact quote in a newspaper.”
“As I said before, don’t believe everything you read about me. Fame is fleeting and can be gone in a flash. I’ve seen it happen to many other musicians in Nashville. I’m not letting it go to my head. This is my fifteen seconds of fame, that’s all. Here today, gone tomorrow. I’ll only get into big trouble if I let myself think it will last forever.”