The Bull Rider Wears Pink

by Jeanine McAdam

  Cassidy stopped jumping.

  “At least you didn't break your coccyx,” Kevin offered dryly.

  Okay, one terrific ride wasn't going to improve their relationship drastically. But maybe it was a start and Cassidy was going to keep trying. She planned to watch a few more episodes of Firefly tonight and maybe some Battlestar. But until then, she put her arms out. “Give your mother a hug,” she insisted, “for not breaking her butt.”

  Kevin hesitated.

  “Yeah,” John encouraged. “Hug your mother, boy.”

  “You need to get your left arm in the air higher,” Kevin told her as Cassidy stepped forward and wrapped her arms around him. Her son didn't hug her back but at least he was letting her hug him. “You're going to lose points because you almost touched the bull.” Then he looked up at the score board. “Seventy-two is pretty bad,” he scolded. “Crosshairs got more points than you did.” He laughed.

  “I'll work on my arm tomorrow,” Cassidy replied. She smiled again. Honestly, she didn't care her bull was better than her. “It was still a damn good ride,” she told her son. “Wasn't it?” Why oh why, did she need the validation?

  “I suppose so,” Kevin reluctantly agreed, then he shrugged.

  Well, at least he didn't mention anything about mortification.

  One of the bull fighters, also known as a rodeo clown passed her bull rope over the fence. “Hey, little lady,” Mike Shannon purred which was completely inappropriate for eight-thirty in the morning. “You forgot something. If you're going to ride you've got to pick your rope up.” He winked at her.

  This was distressing because the man was dressed as a clown. John seemed to feel the same way. Cassidy could feel the hairs on his arm, which were rubbing against her, stand on end.

  “Thanks,” Cassidy replied as she took a step away from John. She was embarrassed and it had nothing to do with Kevin. The sleazy bull fighter was right, no self-respecting bull rider left their rope in the dirt in the middle of the ring. “I won't forget it next time.”

  “Remember,” Mike Shannon warned. “This is a really tough sport. If any of you girls want to compete in the men's division you've got to carry your own rope and grow yourself some balls.” He grabbed his polka dotted covered crotch and tugged.

  “Dear Lord,” John moaned. “Could you not do that around the lady?”

  Shannon suggested as he backed away from the fence, “You should grow yourself a pair too preacher man.”

  John did nothing. Back in L.A., if his manhood had been insulted he would have been over that fence and had the clown on the ground before Mike Shannon figured out his red nose was facing the ceiling. Cassidy glanced at John again. He still did nothing.

  Even though his lack of a reaction was immensely attractive, because she'd spent many years dealing with the fallout from his anger, she wasn't going to let that get her all flustered around the man. She turned away and started walking toward the locker room. Within two steps John was at her side.

  “Don't listen to your son, it was a good ride,” he told Cassidy, his cowboy boots keeping in step with hers. This man who never said anything supportive or encouraging had actually complimented her. Cassidy was surprised but regrettably not delighted. It was too late. It wasn't John’s approval she was looking for anymore. She watched Kevin disappear behind the chutes. She wanted her son's blessing.

  Then John did something totally idiotic and completely stupid in the empty hallway. He kissed Cassidy. A quick, wet, and extremely clumsy smack on the lips. It was more like she imagined Pastor John to kiss than L.A. John. Just as quickly as he swooped down on her mouth he pulled back.

  Cassidy wiped her lips on her sleeve. “Why did you do that?” she demanded to know ignoring the fluttering in her stomach. Damn this man, she didn't want to feel like that after such a crappy kiss.

  “Why not?” John replied innocently. “You won the competition.” He pointed at the scoreboard. The last competitor had fallen off her bull and the riding was over. “We need to celebrate.” He took his hands off her hips and leaned back against the wall across from her. She already missed the feel of his touch. It may sound weird, but John Risk was a man with very strong fingers and Cassidy liked them.

  “You're a minister,” she said accusingly. She looked around to see if anyone could hear them. “And,” she whispered, “you're working.” She knew he would pick up on her double meaning.

  Except he didn't react. Not even a movement of his Adam's apple.

  Slightly unnerved Cassidy folded her arms over her chest and shifted her hips toward him. She knew she was being coy but it was so damn difficult to not be attracted to him. Sort of like Mal having the hots for that prostitute with the heart of gold on Firefly. Cassidy shook herself a little. She had wanted togetherness with Kevin but she wasn't sure if she wanted to start thinking like him.

  “I'm not a Catholic priest,” John replied with a snort. “I can kiss the girls.” He pulled himself off the wall and took a step toward her. Since the alley between the arena and locker room was narrow he was practically on top of her. She could feel his breath on her eyelashes. Cassidy's heart pounded faster.

  “How many buckle bunnies have you kissed around here?” she challenged. “I don't want to be another notch in your rosary beads.” Before she met John, he was known as a player at the station house. It seemed she was the only woman who could get him to commit. Sort of like Rachel with Logan—except John didn’t commit for long.

  Then she brushed against his chest as she lifted her hand to push him back. He shuddered and her entire body reacted to his. It would be a very bad decision to get involved with John again even though it was great for her ego to know he was still attracted to her.

  He chuckled. A deep sound that made her toes tingle. “They don't want me,” he said slowly. “They want the bull riders.” He actually looked sad.

  Oh boy, her body always responded to every grunt, moan, and wail the man made. Add in rejected and depressed and Cassidy wanted him even more. Again, she couldn't. He was still doing the job she was done with.

  “I, I don't believe you,” she sputtered. “Everyone wants you.”

  “Most of the time dead,” he said dryly. He continued to look sad. He used to laugh when there was a bounty on his head. It seemed he had changed.

  “I don't want you dead,” she told him. She was trying to make him feel better without kissing him. They needed to create a new pattern in their relationship. Maybe they could be friends.

  He grinned.

  It melted her heart, like it always had. Cassidy turned away. She had to be strong, she didn't want the life John Risk offered. She wanted a cold shower, some hot food, and to find her son. She took a step toward the locker room.

  “I found a hobby,” John whispered.

  Cassidy stopped. She turned her head. Before she left L.A. she told John he needed to find something to do with himself besides police work. Between assignments, every undercover cop had to take four weeks off before starting another job. It was a way to unwind and regroup. Cassidy spent her time practicing on her mechanical bull and lifting weights. John spent his researching drug dealers.

  Cassidy snorted and turned away. She didn't believe him. Next he'd be telling her he took up crocheting or scrapbooking. A hobby wasn't something this man did. “See ya later, Pastor John,” she replied. She reached for the handle on the door.

  “Don't you want to know what my hobby is?” he begged. One of the cowgirls who'd fallen off her bull passed. Cassidy held the door open for her. Once she was gone John glanced around to ensure nobody else was near.

  “No,” Cassidy said bluntly. It was just too little too late. At the time she suggested the hobby, he laughed at her which hurt her feelings. Then he said, “A hobby wasn't going to keep the streets safe.”

  “Why not?” He leaned against the wall and stuck his hands in his pockets. Then he shrugged. “After you left I took your suggestion and got a life.” She pulled at the door again. “
I don't research drug dealers anymore on my days off,” he added quickly.

  Cassidy sighed. The plan had been to not take any interest in John as a human being. Then she wouldn’t want to get involved with him. Honestly, she tried not to but she asked anyways. “What is your hobby?” she moaned. She rolled her eyes, sort of like Kevin had done earlier.

  “I've taken up religion.” He smiled eagerly at her. He wanted her approval.

  But Cassidy didn’t understand. She let the door go. They were still alone in the hall. “Religion?” she asked.

  “Bible study, theology, and just plain old personal growth,” he told her. “Maybe a better way to describe it is I'm studying spirituality in my free time.” He smiled shyly. “That was how I got this job because I knew something about the Old Testament.”

  “So, Pastor John,” Cassidy asked dryly, the cold shower completely forgotten. He had definitely gotten her attention and it wasn't for sexual reasons anymore. “That sermon you're giving on Sunday is the real deal?”

  “It is.” He actually looked proud of himself.

  “Isn't that illegal?” she asked. She thought for a moment. “Or immoral?” Then again the law and morality never stopped John.

  “No,” he protested. “I have a certificate,” he said while digging in his pocket. “I'm covered on both counts.” He pulled out the folded piece of paper. There was a big crease down the middle so it was hard to read.

  “Did you get this online?” Cassidy finally asked after she studied it for a moment. She had no idea if the thing was real. Yes, she probably sounded judgmental. When she recommended a hobby she thought it would be running, sailing or maybe even baking cookies.

  His face flushed red.

  “Don't you think that's...” Cassidy had a hard time coming up with the right word. “Sacrilegious?” she finally decided upon.

  “It's a certificate,” he replied. “Perfectly acceptable in some circles.” His eyes shifted to the right. “Not any different than a partner not telling another partner she has a kid.” He sighed. “Which could be considered sacrilegious to some cops.”

  Cassidy knew he'd mention Kevin at some point. Yes, she probably should have told him when the motorcycle club assignment came up. But she wanted so badly to do that job and she didn't want anything to stand in her way.

  “Why?” she asked, because this conversation wasn't about her or Kevin. “Why are you doing this?” Maybe he wasn't lying about being a preacher but he was lying about other things. He'd already misled Rachel and Logan concerning his identity. Rachel honestly thought he was some kind of a crazy Christian, which wasn't fair to all the really nice Christians out there.

  “You know,” John replied. “I can't tell you about my assignment.”

  Cassidy shook her head and reached for the door handle again. “I know, I know,” she said as she pulled it open. “And...I don't want to know.” Without looking at him again, she disappeared into the locker room. That cold shower was waiting.

  Chapter Four

  “I want to know what you are doing in this line,” Logan said to Cassidy, “instead of that line.” With the tip of his calloused finger flying through the air, her brother pointed first at the men's line followed by the women's line. Rachel was behind him pushing Storm in his umbrella stroller.

  After Cassidy's new sister-in-law read the signs and figured out what was going on she smiled. While her husband continued to frown at his baby sister, Rachel gave Cassidy two enthusiastic thumbs up followed by a, “You go girl.”

  “I'm paying my entry fee,” Cassidy told Logan with a quick smile at Rachel. Cassidy was really starting to like this woman the rodeo called the naked protester. She had her priorities straight because who cared if a girl rode with the cowboys or the cowgirls?

  On the other hand, Logan continued to scowl. “In which division?” he demanded to know. The new father didn't need to get his chaps in a cinch. What did it matter where Cassidy rode? It was the same bulls anyways.

  “The men's,” Cassidy answered calmly. She lifted her index finger and poked her brother in the chest. She had every right to ride with the men because she'd won the last four women's competitions in Tulsa, Albuquerque, Odessa, and Fort Worth. In other words, she was mopping up the field and feeling pretty damn good about herself.

  Plus, she'd been strong on other fronts. After that first sizzling but sloppy kiss, she'd been able to avoid John Risk's advances, even though he showed up practically everyplace with that swoon worthy smile on his face.

  “Ouch,” Logan moaned rubbing at his pec. “Why'd you do that?”

  Sometimes Logan could be dense and needed a good jab to get the neurons firing. But Cassidy wasn't going to enlighten him to that problem of his, instead she poked him again. He tried to swat her hand away but she was too fast and he missed. The more Cassidy competed the quicker her reflexes got. She was at the top of her game and there was nothing more life affirming than getting on a bull and riding its wave of fury for eight seconds. Redemption was another word she used to describe the euphoria.

  “Because you weren't listening to me when I told you my goal was to ride with the men.” With a smile and another poke Cassidy teased her brother. Finally Bret Bodner recognized she was good and grudgingly offered her an opportunity to compete in Colorado. While driving north he told her on speaker phone, “There aren't any more girls, you've bested them all.” Reluctantly he added, “So you'll have to compete against the men.” And he didn't suggest she ride in a bikini.

  “In this competition?” Logan asked eyes wide. They were at the Pikes Peak or Bust rodeo. It was a big one and attracted bull riders from all over the world. “You're going to ride with the men just when I'm making my comeback.” He pulled on his ear. “You'll ruin my return. There's lots of excitement surrounding me and you'll take all the attention away with this first ever female bull riding thing.” He was talking really loud.

  “Bret offered me a spot,” Cassidy answered quietly. She wasn't poking at her brother anymore. She didn't like the idea of raining on Logan's parade, but this was her opportunity to fulfill her dream. Even Kevin was showing a little excitement. When she asked him how he felt about it in the car, he told her it was pretty cool. Then he advised her, “To not get her hopes up because he was still embarrassed by her.” At least she had been demoted from mortified.

  “My overall score is as good as some of the middle-tiered male riders,” Cassidy told Logan.

  “But the bulls are bigger and bred meaner in the men's division.”

  “You don't know that,” Cassidy argued.

  Rachel stepped forward. “I've never heard of that either. I can ask Matt. He probably knows.” Matt Dillinger is a bull owner and was Rachel's nemesis during her protesting days until they figured out they were both fighting for the health and wellbeing of the bulls. Now, Rachel and Matt are the best of friends.

  “Hey, Logan,” Kevin offered as he looked up from his computer. Yes, Kevin was again standing next to Cassidy in the registration line with his Macbook in the crook of his left arm. He typed with his right hand. Some would call Cassidy's son a geek but Cassidy preferred to think of him as a multi-tasker.

  Logan glanced at his nephew but didn't respond because focusing on more than one thing wasn't something he did well. “Why now?” Logan asked Cassidy, a slight whine in his voice. A few riders stopped by the line and welcomed him with hearty handshakes and slaps on the back. Cassidy didn't think she'd steal any of his thunder, he was popular.

  “Because I've got a better overall score than Jarret Price and Blake Carpenter,” she replied. With a calculator Cassidy had studied the standings last night. “And, I haven't fallen off a bull yet,” she added. She wanted to knock on wood but unfortunately in a gaudy hotel conference room there was nothing natural around. If only she had her gold coin, but it was back in her room. She looked for John. She was thinking about rubbing his leather band but he was nowhere in sight, which was odd. She'd just have to pray the gods of broke
n bones were not looking down on her at that moment.

  “Yeah,” Logan said scratching his head. “But Price and Carpenter suck. Any girl could beat them.” He pointed with his thumb over his shoulder. “Even Rachel.”

  The woman from Brooklyn tapped her husband on the shoulder. “I didn't know you were so against people pursuing their dreams.” Even though she was shorter she looked down her nose at her husband. It was a thing only those born and bred in New York could do.

  “I'm not against anyone's dream,” Logan tried to defend himself. “I just don't think she should bull ride in the men's division.” He pushed his hat back and rubbed his forehead. “Remember she's got a son.”

  “And, she's doing a great job with him,” Rachel replied. “Even though I was a little hesitant at the beginning.” She glanced at Cassidy apologetically. “I think this road trip was a wonderful idea.”

  Rachel’s approval meant so much and just when Cassidy was getting ready to thank her for her vote of confidence Logan stepped in. “I know, but riding with the men is—” Logan started again.

  “You’re sounding a lot like a—” Rachel interrupted.

  “I'm not a chauvinist, anti-feminist, or even—” Logan looked down at his boots as he snapped his fingers next to his head. “What was that thing you called me when we first met?” he asked Rachel.

  “Misogynist?” Rachel suggested.

  Logan nodded and pointed at her. “I'm not that either.” He took a deep breath.

  “Then what is wrong with you?” She wanted to know.

  A cowboy behind them in line muttered something about Logan liking sheep but they ignored him. Another guy wearing a Kenny Chesney T-shirt commented on Logan's itsy-bitsy private part. He got ignored too.

  “I just don't want to see Cassidy get hurt,” Logan finally told his wife in a low voice. Then, he glanced at the guys to ensure they couldn’t hear. Like John Risk, Logan had gotten a lot better at ignoring insults. He stuck his hands in his pockets and leaned into Rachel. “Holy hell, she's my little sister and I finally have her back,” he whispered.