The Heart You Need

by Diane R. Jewkes

  “Alec,” Martha drew his attention, “I would like to ask you a favor.” He was taken by the seriousness in her eyes.

  “Anything, madam.”

  “Don’t break her heart.”

  It was a gut punch. Alec felt the words, gently said but forcefully received. He looked into Martha’s eyes, so much like Linnie’s, lined with laughter and creased with the pain of lost love. Her gaze was calm but resolute. He remembered when Hawke had come to him after being confronted by Kara’s father. Now he understood. He owed his friend an apology for not sympathizing more.

  “The light in her eyes that has been gone for so long is back.” Her steady regard and quiet voice made him lean in. “And it’s because of you. She will deny it, but I see her feelings for you growing. So, as a mother who doesn’t want to see the light die in her daughter again, I will ask you if her feelings are returned.”

  Alec ran his finger around the collar of his shirt, stretching it against the sudden tightness. Flushing, he squirmed like a worm on a hook. He hadn’t felt this off-kilter since he’d been brought before the headmaster at Eaton for being out after curfew. Looking over at Linnie, who had joined her brother at the edge of the water, her skirts tucked up into her waistband, taking pictures with a small camera of her brother splashing in the lapping waves. A certainty came over him, and he turned back to Martha.

  “Yes, I do have feelings—strong feelings—for your daughter. My desire to help her solve the mystery of her cousin’s death is driven by a need to protect her and to be with her.” Taking a sip of the wine, he set the glass down. “But my loving her isn’t the issue.” He saw the question in Martha’s eyes. “It’s her belief that our relationship can go nowhere because I will be returning to Scotland. I believe her concern is for the welfare of you and her brother.”

  “I see,” Martha plucked some grapes from a bunch in the basket. “And as you are a gentleman, I know you have many business and family obligations that you must return to soon.”

  Alec opened his mouth to respond, but closed it as he started contemplating; what did he need to rush back for? His property was well managed, and with improvements in technology, transmission rates across the trans-Atlantic cable were much faster, so conducting business with home was not a problem. What did he have to go back to? His plan to return with Hawke and Kara was not from necessity. What if he stayed here for a while? He and Hawke had been working on finding someone they trusted to place in the San Francisco offices, but had yet to hire anyone. A plan began formulating, as visions of he and Linnie together began to tease him. Excitement bubbled through his veins. There were opportunities beyond the shipping business to explore here. Why shouldn’t he stay?

  A soft noise brought him back. Martha smiled in understanding. He was realizing how formidable a woman she was. “I see the wheels turning. You seem to have solved your dilemma.”

  Laughing, he stood, bowed to her, and strode toward Linnie at the waterline. Watching her, he saw the way the light on the bay behind her sparkled like cut crystal in the sunlight and how it reflected in her eyes, green as the sea grass. The blue of the sky made the reds in her hair glow, sunset colors framing her face. It wasn’t solved, he thought, but it had become much smaller.

  • • •

  Linnie turned to find Alec approaching her, and her breath caught at the sight. He moved gracefully, she thought, even over the sand. She wondered if she could capture that grace using her box camera. Dismissing the idea, she waited as he stopped in front of her. He reached up and moved a windswept tendril from her face and tucked it softly behind her ear.

  She was puzzled, not sure of what had come over him. She had seen him speaking with her mother, but her attention had been torn between keeping an eye on Freddie and taking advantage of the light, photographing the bay and the beach. Freddie had moved further up the beach collecting rocks and shells. He knew not to go far. Now, with Alec standing next to her, her senses were overwhelmed. He was all she could see. Craving his touch, she smiled tentatively as he reached toward her again. The brush of his finger across her forehead sent spears of desire surging through her. Raw desire lit his eyes, but there was something else too. Something deeper. Her heart pounded in response. Nervously, she looked over to see if her mother was watching, but she had walked down the beach, probably fetching Freddie before he wandered too far.

  “Your mother is a wise woman.” His eyes were as blue as the sky above them, and she wished she could photograph the scene in color. She knew about the process, but it was too expensive. The breeze teased his hair, and she reached up to smooth it back down. “This has been a most enlightening,” he took her hand, placing a kiss on her knuckles, “and enjoyable day.” She still couldn’t read him, and she began to worry.

  “This almost sounds like a good-bye.” She started to step back, afraid of what she was about to hear.

  He drew her closer and bent his head to hers. “Far from it, lass.” He kissed her, lips barely touching. “Far from it.” Linnie leaned up to capture his lips again, when she heard her mother’s voice calling for Freddie. Leaning away from Alec, she saw Martha coming around the dunes. Alec looked up, eyes narrowed as he searched the beach.

  “I don’t see him.” Her mother came running to them, gasping for breath, clutching Linnie’s arm. “I can’t find him! I’ve looked everywhere and I don’t see him.”

  Alec looked toward the bay. “Would he have gone swimming?” He scanned the water.

  “No.” Linnie turned and stared toward the cliffs and the burned-out shell perched atop them. “He’s a good swimmer, but everyone knows the water is too cold and the currents too strong for swimming, and sharks inhabit the bay.” She looked up at Alec, “If he’s gone anywhere, it might be to the ruins. There are people along the beach.” She took her mother’s hands. “We need to remain calm and talk to others and ask if anyone has seen him. We’ll start working our way to the end of the beach. We’ll find him.” She prayed silently that she spoke truth. Looking at Alec, she saw the same thought occur to him: what if their investigation into Vonn was behind this? Biting her lip to keep from revealing her fear, she headed off to search.

  • • •

  It felt like time had stopped and at the same time like daylight raced away from them as they talked to everyone they saw on the beach. They climbed the cliffs to the blackened ruins, but a guard at the top told them no one had been up there. Linnie’s heart pounded as they hurried back to where their picnic lay, forgotten and covered in sand, a silent witness to the unexpected turn of events. She and Alec continued down the end of the beach around the dunes while her mother, with the help of people on the beach, went to get the police.

  “He’s not anywhere!” Martha cried. Linnie felt her mother collapsing under the press of fear. Grabbing her mother around the waist, they sank onto the cooling sands.

  Alec’s arms came around both of them, an enveloping shield of warmth. “We’ll find him … I promise you both that. I will use every resource I have to make sure nothing happens to him.” Looking up, she saw the conviction; iron in his eyes. “We know who is behind this, and he will pay.”

  Chapter 19

  The knock woke Linnie. She was surprised to have slept at all. Her mother lay sleeping on the bed, and Linnie was grateful the knock hadn’t woken her. After returning home from the beach, Linnie spent most of the night soothing her. It was strange how their roles had reversed. When her father and Robert died, her mother was the strong one; the calm voice telling her life would go on. Now it was Linnie’s turn. She rose and tucked the covers around the sleeping woman, noting the dark bruises of exhaustion under her eyes and the tension around her mouth, even in sleep. Swiping her hands down her wrinkled dress and wishing she had time to clean up a bit, Linnie headed downstairs, hoping whoever was there would not knock again and wake her mother.

  Pru swept through the door and took Linnie in a tight embrace. “I got here as soon as I heard! Why ever didn’t you call me? You know J
ohnathan and I would have come right over.” The women walked to the kitchen, and Pru insisted Linnie sit. There were biscuits on the table, and Linnie picked at one while Pru bustled about, putting on the kettle and making them tea. “What is going on?” Pru set the cups down and took her hands. “I know Freddie, and he wouldn’t have gone into the water or just wandered off.” Pru’s eyes narrowed, and Linnie could see her putting the puzzle together. “It was Vonn! Wasn’t it? He’s trying to make you stop looking into Tommy’s death.”

  “That’s what Alec and I think. And I know I can’t trust the police.” Linnie felt tears prickling her eyes. “They are in Vonn’s pocket. I don’t know what to do. We reported it to the police, and they searched, but I know if I say anything about whom I suspect …” Tears rolled down her cheeks, fear and frustration battling in her chest.

  “Alec? Lord MacCairn? What does he have to do with this?”

  Linnie brought Pru up to date since the last time they’d spoken.

  “You slept with him!” Pru looked both shocked and intrigued. “Once we’ve found Freddie and he is safely home, you and I need to talk.”

  Linnie couldn’t help but smile at the scandalized expression. She reached over and took her friend’s hands. “We will, I promise.”

  “Has there been any news?” Both women turned, seeing Martha enter the kitchen in a dressing gown, her hair in a long braid down her back. She was bent over, yesterday’s events an anvil on her shoulders. Linnie and Pru rushed to get her seated and press a warm cup of tea into her hands.

  “I haven’t heard anything yet,” Linnie said. “I was going to call the police station shortly for an update. I—” A knock at the door interrupted her. The fear that it was the police with bad news was reflected in her mother’s face. Slowly she walked to the door, memories of the night they had learned of her father’s ship sinking running through her head. This felt horribly familiar. Reaching the door, she eased it open, her hands trembling and her heart pounding. It was Alec. Relief flooded through her as he stepped inside and took her in his arms.

  “Have you heard something? You’re as white as a sheet, and I was sure you were going to faint when you opened the door.” He reached up and caressed her cheek. Leaning down he touched his lips to hers. The kiss was warm, offering harbor to her heart, and she eagerly accepted.

  Resting her head on his shoulder as he stroked her hair, she felt some of the burden lift. “Nothing yet, I was just saying to my mother and Pru …” She pulled out of his arms and grabbed his hand. “Come, I know Mother will be happy to see you.” He entered the kitchen and went over to Martha, knelt, and took her hands. “We will find him. I have contacted Pinkerton’s, and they are utilizing their resources to search. I promise … he will come home.” Linnie felt fresh tears roll as her mother threw herself into Alec’s arms with a heartrending cry. Pru stood, and together they took Martha upstairs and settled her into bed again, staying until she fell into an exhausted sleep.

  • • •

  Returning to the kitchen, Linnie apologized for leaving Alec alone for so long and introduced him to Pru.

  “Please, call me Alec,” he insisted, smiling at the young woman. “I hope to have the opportunity to get to know you better under happier circumstances.”

  Turning to Linnie, he could see the worry and strain taking its toll. “I have told the Pinkerton chief to send word to me here if they hear anything.” Stepping closer, he placed his hands on her shoulders. “You should rest as well. I promise if anything happens, I’ll wake you.” She started to protest. “I know you could handle this on your own, but you don’t have to. Please,” he leaned his forehead against hers, “I am a part of this, and with both of us working, we will find him. I am here to help with the burden, so go rest for a bit.” He drew her into his arms and kissed her on the top of the head. He looked at Pru, nodding as she came over to help her friend upstairs.

  Sitting at the small table, he looked around. Nothing in the neat room gave any indication of the turmoil in the house. Knowing what these women had endured in their lives fueled his determination that they would not go through this alone. A fierce sense of protectiveness rushed over him. They were as much family to him as his own parents. He knew there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do for them. Sitting back in the chair, he understood how Hawke had felt when Kara was attacked. Linnie was his, and any that tried to harm her or her family would answer to him.

  “She’s resting—reluctantly.” Pru entered the kitchen, smiling warmly as he offered to fill her teacup. “I convinced her to wash and rest at least for a little bit. I know your being here made it easier for her to take my suggestion.” She spooned some sugar in her cup, watching him as she stirred. “I know about the search for Tommy’s killer and Linnie’s research into Vonn, and …” She smiled. “How the two of you ‘met.’ No one has tried to take Vonn down, even though it’s well known about his less-than-legal dealings.” She leaned in. “I told Linnie in the beginning that you would help, and I’m glad I was right.”

  • • •

  Linnie and Martha came downstairs feeling better for the rest. Alec told Linnie he was formulating his next moves. Kara and Hawke came by, bringing baskets of food and information.

  “It’s all too much,” Martha said, looking at the bounty filling her kitchen. “A viscountess wearing my apron and acting like a cook. I’m very appreciative, but you shouldn’t …”

  “Of course we should.” Kara stepped over and gave her a hug. “Your daughter has become very dear to us, and there is no way we would let you go through this on your own.” Linnie watched as these wonderful people, wonderful friends, did everything in their power to help. Smiling warmly, Kara directed Martha to a rocker and sat her down. “Besides, my tía would have my hide if I didn’t do everything in my power to help.” She laughed as she pressed a plate of food into Martha’s hands. “I’m just a rancher’s daughter. I was raised cooking for the hands and working hard. Consuelo, my tía, our housekeeper, practically raised me after my mother died. She made sure I never thought I was better than anyone else and to value the reward of hard work. So, please, just because I married a man with a title, don’t ever think I’m above helping. If I thought he’d let me, I’d be out searching with the detectives.”

  “Not a chance.” Hawke stood behind her, his arm wrapped across her shoulders. “No matter how good you are with a gun.”

  Alec tapped Hawke on the shoulder, and they stepped into the other room.

  Linnie walked over and gave Kara a hug, happy to have her new friend and her oldest friend there. Looking over at Alec and Hawke in deep conversation, her mother surrounded by Pru and Kara, she felt a small spark of hope ignite in her chest. For the first time since Freddie’s disappearance she felt everything might be all right.

  Alec and Hawke gestured to her and Kara to follow them into the front room. “We decided I would go to the brothel where your cousin was killed to see if there has been any gossip about your brother, Freddie, or Vonn’s plans.” Alec’s expression said he’d take no argument.

  “I’m going with you. I know about the Tenderloin and the people there. I’ve been investigating the underbelly of San Francisco for many years. There are things you need to know.”

  Alec laughed. “I assure you I am familiar with the underbelly of many cities. I don’t say this proudly, but I can handle myself.” Linnie started to protest again. Alec halted her. “While I might garner a passing look as a rich nob looking for paid companionship, you, my beauty, would draw too much attention. I won’t be able to find any answers if I’m fending off men wanting to get too close.” He gave her a hard look full of heat. “And believe me, I won’t let dregs like that anywhere close to what is mine.” Linnie flushed at the bold claim but felt no desire to challenge it. Her whole body thrummed, a magnetic pull, desire for a future being loved by him. She remembered his expression when they were at the beach and what he said to her before her world was torn apart. The hope it had made her feel
buoyed her now.

  Hearing throat clearing and soft laughter, she pulled away, dipping her head so no one could see her flaming cheeks. She realized her mother and Pru had entered the room. What did he do to her, making her forget everyone and everything around her? Rolling her shoulders, she turned back to see Kara and Pru giving her knowing smiles and her mother giving Alec a measured look. She heard him clear his throat and turned to see him shifting uncomfortably. Good! She was glad she wasn’t the only one embarrassed.

  “While Hawke and Alec are out,” Kara said, “we should see what we can find out. Pru was telling me about a tea this afternoon, and I will accompany her.”

  “Mrs. Vonn will be in attendance,” Pru added. “I have run into her at different functions, so she knows who I am, and I’m sure having Lady Kara will add enough excitement to the event that the ladies of San Francisco will be tripping over themselves to impress her. If Mrs. Vonn knows what her husband is up to, we might be able to get her to slip up.”

  “And what will I be doing?” Linnie was beginning to feel irritated. Everyone was making decisions but her. “This is my brother and my investigation.”

  “He’s my son.” Martha’s soft words took the air out of the room. “I will stay here to see if they contact us. You,” her mother looked at her, fear warring with determination in her eyes, “will go to the police, so they believe we are relying solely on their manpower.”

  Linnie hurried over, wrapping her mother in a hug. “I’m sorry,” she said softly.

  • • •

  Linnie returned from the police station. Alec had stayed with her mother as the others left for meetings and tea parties. She unpinned her hat and set it and her purse on the hall table in the foyer. It was quiet … too quiet, as if the house itself were waiting for the return of the little boy who loved to race through the halls and slide down the banister. Dust motes danced in the light slanting through the parlor windows as she walked in the room. Alec was sitting alone, a glass of whiskey and a notebook on the side table.