The Heart You Need

by Diane R. Jewkes

  “This is about all of it. Freddie, your cousin, festering corruption that is threatening the lives of you and those you love. It’s not as if I haven’t faced danger or seen death,” he growled. “I was in the military stationed in India. And even though as first sons we were shielded from some missions, we did fight—and we killed.” He eased his hold on her arm and began to rub his thumb over her skin. The touch sent skitters of electricity along her nerves. “I’ve spent my life standing behind others because of who I am. Many good men lost their lives, and Hawke and I both knew our privilege saved us.” His breathing was labored as he continued, “We knew it wasn’t fair, and we fought with our commanders to change it.” He stood. “We were told we were the fortunate ones and that was the way the British military operated. But how can you ask men to trust you when they know it will always be their lives forfeited over yours? When Hawke was shot at the ranch and I thought he might die, it all became too real. I looked at what I was doing with my life and realized I was dishonoring the men who died because they weren’t fortunate in their birth. I decided it was time I stepped to the front.” He sat again, his shoulders slumped as he leaned his elbows on his knees and rubbed his face in his hands. “I’ve seen what Hawke has done. He’s made his own way, and that is what I want. Seeing the love he found with Kara illustrates what a waste I’ve made of my opportunities …”

  Linnie ached for the pain in his voice. He seemed defeated. “You haven’t wasted your chances. You didn’t need to put your life in danger to prove yourself. I’ve never thought of you as sitting on your laurels waiting for the world to come to you.”

  He reached over, taking her hands. “Everything that happened tonight was worth it. We have an idea where Freddie might be, and a possible witness to Tommy’s death. I’ve already contacted Hawke, and he is on his way here.” He raised her hands to his lips and placed a gentle kiss on them. “From the first time I saw you carrying all your photographic equipment into the hotel, I was intrigued. And as I’ve gotten to know you, my admiration has grown. You, despite all the pain and adversity in your life, embody bravery and self-reliance; I could learn much from you. There are so many things we need to discuss …” He looked up at a knock on the door. Standing, he pulled her up with him. “But now is not the time.”

  • • •

  There was no one at the door when Alec opened it. A small oblong box, like a jeweler’s box, sat on the porch. Alec stepped over it and hurried to see if he could spot who’d left it. There was no one on the street as he looked up and down. The streetlights’ glow did not illuminate much beyond their poles; the fog that had arrived the night before lay thick and dark on the street. Carriages were ghostly as they went by, and sounds were muffled. Whoever left the box could be standing nearby and still be invisible. Turning back toward the house, he watched as Linnie leaned down and slowly lifted the box. Her eyes were wide and her face drained of all color as she held the box in her palms, hands open as if it might grow teeth and bite her. Alec hurried to her and placed a steadying hand on her back.

  “Take a breath, love,” he said, gingerly guiding her back into the parlor. Sitting her down, he took the box and set it on the table. Kneeling before her, he took her ice-cold hands in his. He felt rhythmic tremors racing through her body. “Linnie. Linnie.” He reached up and placed a finger under her chin and raised her head up. Tears were puddling, and he could see the terror there. “We don’t know what this is. You need to stay calm. We’ll get through this.” He massaged her neck, trying to ease the tension that gripped her. “If you’d like, you can leave the room and I’ll open it first …”

  She blinked, the unshed tears stopped before they began. Her eyes focused, looking first at the box and then at him. “No.” She covered his hands with one of hers and smiled wanly. “Even if I wanted to run from this with every fiber of my being, I couldn’t. I am so grateful you are here to help me through this.” Breathing deeply, she exhaled and reached for the box. “As afraid as I am of opening this, I’m more afraid of waiting.”

  He rotated his hand and squeezed hers. Straightening, he sat by her on the sofa. Holding the box in her lap, she lifted the lid, fear knotting her brow. A soft cry escaped as she saw a note nestled next to a lock of hair. Alec pulled her tight to him as great sobs wracked her body. His own heartbeat slowed with relief seeing it was a small lock of hair in the cruel message. Lifting the note, he read it aloud while Linnie rubbed the soft curls between her fingers.

  “Bring all of your research, photographs, and any other items you have pertaining to your investigation to me, or you will receive your brother in pieces. I will send a messenger with the time and place tomorrow. If your noble friends try to help or you don’t come alone, I will kill him.”

  He heard a sharp gasp and turned to see Martha collapsing in the doorway. They rushed over and helped her to a chair. Linnie rubbed her wrists while Alec splashed some whiskey in a glass and pressed it into her hands.

  “I … I can’t lose him,” Martha cried as she looked back and forth from Linnie to Alec. “What is your research the kidnapper is talking about?” She looked at Linnie, her brow wrinkled with confusion and desperation. Linnie looked up at Alec and back to her mother. Alec saw Linnie searching for the best way to tell her mother everything, when another knock sounded at the door. Alec opened the door to Hawke, who strode in removing his hat, assessing the scene before him.

  “What has happened? I didn’t get anywhere with Aldus—sniveling bootlick.” Hawke sneered in disgust. “The man would sell out his own mother. None of his braggadocio at the club panned out. Vonn has him petrified.” The men moved into the parlor, and Alec handed Hawke the note.

  “We have to contact the Pinkertons.” Hawke tapped the note against his hand.

  “Yes, but we must be discreet,” Alec added. “I would not be surprised if Vonn has men watching this house, the newspaper, and our hotel—that’s what I would do.”

  “I’m taking my mother upstairs to lie down,” Linnie interrupted their discussion. “When I return, I want to know what you are planning.”

  “Do you need any assistance?” Alec gave her arm a reassuring squeeze, wishing he could hold her and make this entire nightmare go away. She shook her head and turned back to help Martha up the staircase. Alec told Hawke what he found out at the whorehouse and the location of the warehouse where the girls had been kept. They decided not to tell Linnie. Alec knew she would ignore everyone and rush over if she thought there was a chance Freddie was being held there. It was time for cold calculation and planning.

  “I’ll arrange a meeting with the detectives.” Hawke handed him the note back. “I’ll make sure no one—not even Linnie—knows they are being followed. I’ll also have them keep tabs on Vonn and his henchman. That should give us the advantage.” Hawke reached for his hat as he walked to the door. He looked at the staircase and back at Alec. “She’s a strong woman, but if her brother doesn’t come out of this safely, this might break her.”

  Alec nodded. “I’ll die before I let anything more happen to this family. They have become precious to me.” Hawke nodded, his eyes hard with resolve. “I’ll see you back at the hotel.” Alec closed the door. Turning, he saw Linnie standing partway down the stairs.

  “He’s wrong, you know,” her voice was soft but firm. “I won’t break.” Her legs seemed to give out as she folded into herself on the step. “I won’t—I won’t break. I can’t.” Alec rushed up the stairs and drew her into his arms. Holding her head against his chest, he stroked her hair, shushing her as she kept repeating herself.

  He kissed the top of her head. “You aren’t alone, love. We will get him back. I won’t let anything happen. You must trust me on this.” He smoothed her hair as she raised tear-reddened eyes up to him. “Let’s get you a cup of tea and something to eat. You’re exhausted, and that won’t be any help to anyone.” He helped her down the steps into the kitchen and sat her at the table. Looking around, he realized how out of his depth
he was. “I don’t know that I’ve spent much time in a kitchen.” She started to rise. “No … sit. It’s about time I learned how to get a cup of tea.” He smiled at her chuckle. He knew he would do anything to bring a smile back to her face. Until they brought Freddie home, he knew these small moments were all he could offer to alleviate the crushing fear that had become her life. He marveled at the woman sitting in the comfortable room. How she had been through so much but still glowed with a love of life that people with lives of ease lacked. Looking around at his surroundings, he wasn’t sure what to do. The kitchen was large; with an impressive black and silver cook stove, porcelain sink, and ample cupboards and surfaces. Spying the teakettle on the stove, he walked over and set it on the heat. He did know to check the coal box and stir the banked coals to life. Closing the door, he turned and looked for the china. Linnie cleared her throat and indicated the cupboard to his left.

  “Really, Alec, I can do this much quicker than you.” Her eyes twinkled at his discomfiture. “I appreciate what you are trying to do,” the light died in her eyes, “but I need to move … to do something.” Standing, she walked to the pie safe in the corner and pulled out a lattice-top apple pie. “Sit. I’ll take care of this.” Alec leaned against the china hutch watching her, feeling helpless. She approached the hutch to get the teacups and plates. He pulled her against his chest, wrapping his arms around her and laying his cheek on the top of her head. Not saying a word, he felt her slide her arms around his waist, holding him tightly. The fine tremors running through her body started to slow, and he felt her muscles relax, her breasts pressed into him as she drew a deep, slow breath. Rubbing his hands up and down her back, he relished the simple comfort he could offer. This was home, a place, a feeling he never wanted to lose, and it was all because of the woman in his arms.

  Hating to break the moment, he reluctantly set her from him. “We need to talk about what is going to happen next.” He could see the weight of a thousand worries pressed her shoulders down. She reached into the cupboard and retrieved the dishes, then set them on the drop-side table.

  “I know you and Hawke think you have this under control …” her voice quavered, “but, Alec, I’m so afraid Vonn will find out what you two are doing and … and …” She fisted her hand against her mouth. “I can’t take that chance. I have to go alone, without being followed.” She raised her hand at his objection. “I can’t gamble Freddie’s life that way.”

  “You can’t gamble your life either,” Alec replied, his anger rising. He had known she would object, and knew he had to convince her otherwise. “There are no guarantees that Vonn will let you live. In fact, there is a very good chance he plans on killing you and Freddie.” Taking her by the shoulders, he forced her to look at him. “You don’t understand. He has no reason to let either of you live, and putting yourself in that kind of danger is unacceptable to me. I won’t lose the woman I love just as I’ve found her.”

  “I love you too,” Linnie whispered, warmth rushing red into her cheeks. “But it doesn’t change the fact that you are on Vonn’s home turf. He has the advantage in this game, and you’re correct,” she placed a hand on his chest, “there is no incentive for him to let me live. But it’s a chance I have to take.”

  All the anger rushed from him at her declaration. She loved him. But still she wouldn’t trust him enough to follow his suggestions. His heart leapt with the knowledge of her returned love, but at the same time, fear battled within him that her willingness to walk into a trap might end their budding relationship.

  • • •

  She watched the war behind his beautiful blue eyes. His need to protect her and her family made her heart swell. How had this man come into her life? She’d never expected to find someone like him. His nobility wasn’t in his birth; it was in every fiber of his being. When she’d overheard him telling Hawke that he would die for her, she’d known it wasn’t just words. And that knowledge frightened her as much as it bolstered her.

  “I don’t want to lose you either, and after what happened last night, I’m afraid he’ll send his thugs after you when you least expect it. Or you’ll just disappear, and I’ll die a thousand deaths waiting to hear what has happened to you.” Memories of the weeks after her father’s ship had gone down clenched her throat and tore at her heart. “I couldn’t survive that again.”

  “You won’t.” He slid his hand up her shoulder and tangled his fingers in her hair. “Vonn isn’t the ocean. He’s a man…and any man can be bested.” His eyes darkened. “I’ll never leave you, little bird.” His lips hovered above hers, his breath warm on her skin. “Never.” He captured her mouth, sliding his lips across hers, nibbling her lower lip until she responded, opening her lips to his. She felt his other arm slip around her waist, molding her hips to his, desire evident through the layers of clothing. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she drew him deeper into the kiss, never wanting the moment to end. Their love, so new and tender, flared, deepening, growing until she felt they were one soul in two bodies. Breaking the kiss, he smiled down at her. “As much as I want to lay you on this table and taste every part of you,” his gaze traveled hungrily down her body, “we should stop—for now.” Linnie felt out of breath, her body tingling with desire. She knew he was right, but hated the thought of not being in his arms. The teakettle whistled as the water boiled.

  “I know you think we are putting ourselves in danger and can’t protect you,” Alec said, walking to the other side of the table, “but we can and will. You need to go to the newspaper tomorrow as if nothing is wrong. I think he’ll contact you there.” She started to object, but he continued, “When he does, you have to get a message to me as soon as possible.” His brow knotted. “Please, please, my love, trust me. I will get your brother back.”

  She nodded, knowing she couldn’t put his life in danger. Not for her problem.

  Chapter 20

  Sitting up in bed, Linnie rubbed her aching eyes; surprised she had slept at all. After Alec had left, she’d spent the rest of the afternoon and evening talking with her mother. She’d apologized again and again for her investigation taking such a horrific turn and promised her mother that Freddie would come home safe and sound.

  Linnie headed to the Call over Martha’s objections, after dressing and grabbing a quick bite. She told her mother to contact her if any packages or letters were delivered to the house, but she agreed with Alec—Vonn was more likely to contact her at the paper.

  She couldn’t shake how normal everything seemed as she walked up the stairs to the office. Coworkers greeted her. She wanted to reach out and shake them, scream, and drag them into the hell that was now her reality. But she didn’t. She smiled and greeted them back. She unpinned her hat, hung it with her jacket on the peg outside her desk area. She sat at her desk and pulled out the photographs she needed to work on for the daily edition, and stared, unable to corral her frenzied thoughts.

  “Ellsworth!” Linnie jerked at the bellow from her editor. Whipping her head around, she saw him thundering toward her, cigar smoke trailing him. Stopping at her desk, he eyed her while chomping the end of his cigar. “It’s about time you showed up! When are you going to get those shots to the printers for the mock-up? Where have you been? Do you still want to be employed?” His questions were barked so rapidly, she didn’t have a chance to answer. As taken aback as she was, she was relieved. Mr. Weathersby’s bluster pulled her out of the chasm of chaos her emotions seemed trapped in and brought her back to the here and now.

  “I have them right here, sir.” She held up the prints she had been holding. “I’ll have them marked up and sent down shortly. I’m sorry I was late—” she stuttered as she thought up an excuse that would mollify him. “My mother and brother have been ill all weekend, and I was caring for them. They just started feeling well enough to get out of bed this morning.”

  Weathersby grumbled and muttered as he looked down at the pictures and at her. She knew she looked as tired as she felt, lending credenc
e to her excuse. “Just get them down there before deadline.” He strode down the hall, cigar smoke puffing behind him. “Jones! Where is my story?”

  She sighed as she slumped back in her chair, tapping the pencil on the desk as she worried how she could pretend to be working while every nerve was dancing under her skin, waiting for Vonn to contact her.

  After forcing herself to finish marking the photographs she decided to take them downstairs for layout and stretch her legs. Walking through the lobby to the staircase, she felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up. Looking around, she tried to pinpoint who was watching her. The lobby was busy as people hurried in and out from the many other offices in the building. She saw a man leaning against the wall of the telephone banks. He was more roughly dressed then people she normally saw, and she wondered if he was one of Vonn’s thugs. He was digging under his fingernails with a small penknife as his gaze wandered the room. Anger poured through her at the thought he might know where Freddie was. Clenching her fists, she was about to confront him, when he looked up and smiled at a woman who approached him and threw her arms around his neck. The air rushed out as she realized how close she had come to making a fool of herself. Looking around, she didn’t see anyone else who raised her suspicions, so she returned to her office.

  Reaching her desk, she saw Samuel pushing his mail cart her way. Her heart clenched with fear and anticipation. Would Vonn have sent the message through the mailroom? She tried to calm her nerves.

  “Anything for me today, Samuel?” She hoped the strain in her voice wasn’t noticeable.

  “No, ma’am,” he replied as he pushed the cart on by. “Were you expecting something?”

  Her heart sank, disappointment clawing through her. “No … nothing,” she said. Turning, she saw a small box in her chair.

  “Samuel,” she called to the young man. He came back toward her. “Did you leave this here?”