Burn For Me: Into The Fire Series

by Croix, J. H.

  Nothing mattered except what I knew in my heart and soul. Amelia was mine and always had been. No other man had any claim to her.

  Her eyes searched my face, a subtly mutinous look entering her gaze. I knew that look. She was stubborn and whatever she thought I might be thinking, she was getting ready to argue about it.

  Hot anger, jealousy and pure lust driving me, I caught her hand in mine and yanked her to me. Sliding one hand over her lush bottom, I pressed her against my arousal and slammed my mouth against hers. She gasped, and I dove into her mouth. Our kiss exploded into a wet tangle of lips, teeth and tongues. Holding her tight against me, I threaded my other hand into her hair as I devoured her mouth.

  She didn’t hold back, and I loved that about her. Her tongue warred with mine as she flexed into me. Fire roared through me, our kiss getting rougher and wilder with every second. The sound of footsteps in the hallway through the open doorway barely filtered into my consciousness.

  “Hey Amelia, are you…”

  Whoever was walking into Amelia’s office came to an abrupt stop, just as Amelia tore her mouth away from mine. We broke apart as abruptly as we’d come together. I stared at her, unable to tear my eyes away. Her breath was heaving, right along with mine, and her cheeks were flushed. Her lips were swollen from our bruising kiss, and I didn’t give a damn we’d just given someone a show.

  “Wow, sorry for the interruption, but you two just made my day.”

  Amelia snapped her head toward the door, just as I did. Janet from the Firehouse Café stood there with a sly grin on her face. Amelia’s cheeks flushed a deeper shade of pink, making me want to yank her right back against me. I shackled my urges and tried to slow the banging of my heart.

  “Janet, what’s up?” Amelia managed to ask, her voice husky.

  Janet glanced between us, her grin never wavering. “Nothing at all.” With a wink, she spun around and closed the door behind her.

  I looked back to Amelia. For several beats, we simply stood there. She was so close, I could easily reach over and pull her right back to me. I didn’t. I wanted her so fiercely, yet I needed to get control. I was letting burning lust and raw need drive everything. My control was frayed and the jealousy that sent me crashing into her was still simmering. I forced myself to take a slow breath.

  After a moment, I thought I could manage myself. “I, uh…”

  Just what did I mean to say? Hell if I knew.

  Muddled and irritated with myself for being so at the mercy of her, I stepped back and slipped my hands in my pockets. “I’m guessing you need to get to work. I’ve got a few things to take care of, so I’ll go.”

  I started to turn when her voice stopped me.

  “Cade.”

  I glanced back, arching a brow.

  “I didn’t call Earl. He called me,” she said simply.

  I nodded and kept my damn mouth shut. I was acting like a fucking fool over her, and I didn’t like it. Not one bit.

  “It doesn’t mean anything,” she added.

  I realized she was expecting me to say something.

  “I don’t have any right to get pissed about Earl, so you don’t need to explain.” I paused, my thoughts spinning back to the day Amelia had walked in at the worst possible moment. It didn’t matter that it had all been Shannon’s doing. I had a glimmer of what she must’ve felt like back then. I was chewed up inside over nothing other than a phone call from the man I knew she’d left.

  She was still watching me, and I wanted to step to her and wrap her in my arms and forget the knotted mess of emotions we’d never had a chance to untangle. Now we had that chance, but it was going to take some doing.

  “Now I know how you felt that day you saw Shannon trying to climb in bed with me.”

  Her eyes widened and her breath drew in sharply. A heaviness filled the space between us, and my heart ached, literally.

  “Maybe so,” she said softly.

  Footsteps sounded in the hallway again. I marshaled my sanity and stepped to her again. Dipping my head, I dropped a quick kiss on her lips, forcing myself to draw back immediately. “I’m supposed to meet the guys Saturday at Wildlands. How about you meet me there later?”

  I figured perhaps we should try to do something normal and maybe that would help. Amelia’s eyes flashed with something and then she shook her head slowly. “I just told Earl I’d meet him for dinner. It’s not a date. I just figured I owed him an explanation for bolting from our wedding.”

  Her words might as well have been static for all I could hear with the hot jealousy that shot through me. I couldn’t do this, couldn’t fucking do it. I spun away and stalked out of her office.

  Chapter Seventeen

  Amelia

  I started to run after him, but came to an abrupt stop when I saw Cade’s mother in the doorway. Her footsteps must have been the ones we heard approaching. Georgia Masters flicked her eyes from Cade to me. Whatever might be passing through her mind, she kept to herself as she glanced up to Cade. Cade kept walking, his head down.

  I fought the tears pressing hot against the back of my eyes. Georgia looked toward me as Cade’s boots sounded on the stairs. I held myself back from dashing past Georgia and took in a gulp of air.

  The door slammed shut, its sound echoing all the way up the stairs. Georgia’s assessing gaze scanned me. Long before Cade and I had gotten involved, Georgia had been close to a second mother to me. Being good friends with my own mother meant Georgia was around often and babysat for my brother and me when we were little. After Cade had moved away and things had ended on such an ugly note, it had been hard to be around Georgia.

  After a few overtures at first, Georgia stopped trying to talk to me about Cade and let me stew in my own anger. I wished for about the thousandth time in the last week or so that I hadn’t been so damn stubborn for so long. My firm refusal to talk about anything to do with Cade meant I’d never found out the truth of Shannon’s full ownership of that betrayal.

  Georgia angled her head toward my office and walked toward the table. I followed her, if anything because I didn’t know what else to do. Georgia sat down at the small circular table. “Sit down dear,” she said firmly.

  I sat down across from her, resting my elbows on the table and tunneling my hands through my hair.

  “Okay, are we allowed to talk about Cade now?” Georgia asked pointedly.

  I met her sharp green gaze and nodded.

  Georgia was quiet for a beat. “You love him and he loves you. You both messed up because you’re both stubborn as hell.”

  I swallowed against the emotion knotting in my chest and throat. “Did you always know he’d never had anything to do with Shannon?”

  Georgia nodded slowly. “At first, it was only because I knew my son would never do anything like that. Later, the rumors died down and I sorted out what happened. I didn’t try to talk to you about it back then. By then, he was far away in California, and honey, you weren’t having it. So I let it go. He moved on and it seemed like you did too. Trust me, I wanted to meddle, but it didn’t seem fair to either one of you.”

  I let my hands slide out of my hair and traced a fingertip along the curved edge of the table. I wished like hell she’d been unfair and meddled, but it was way too late to do anything about that.

  “I can’t figure out how to fix it now. I was mad for so long and it was all over the wrong thing. I’m still pissed at Shannon, but now I’m just as pissed off at myself.” I paused to catch my breath. Emotion was barreling through me so hard and fast, I felt lightheaded. “He, uh… He got upset because I told him I’d agreed to have dinner with Earl. It’s not a date. I just figure I owe Earl more of an explanation than the one I gave him before I left him behind at our wedding.”

  Georgia drummed her fingers on the table and sighed. “Of course you do. I might think you finally made the right decision for yourself and, frankly, for Earl too. But if he wants a few minutes of your time, he should get it. Earl might not have ever app
reciated you for who you were—at least, that’s how I saw it—but he’s not a bad guy. He’s just…” She pursed her lips as if considering how to describe what she meant. “He’s a guy’s guy and he’s pretty simple. I don’t mean he’s stupid, just basic in how he thinks. You are, well, let me put it this way. You intimate most men because you’re so strong, so independent and so beautiful. He wanted to show he wasn’t cowed by any of that, but he didn’t see past that. Cade will simmer down. He lied to himself about being over you. That much I know. Take it as a good thing he’s so pissed off. That man loves you to pieces. He’s never been one to do anything in half-measures. Give him a little time.”

  I managed to nod, but my heart felt like it was splintering. I moved to tracing a file folder sitting on the table, my eyes following the lines. After a moment, I managed to look up and almost burst into tears. I hated feeling vulnerable, I hated it so much I’d walled Cade and anything to do with him out of my life. Now it was coming back to bite me, and the caring look on Georgia’s face only reminded me how much it hurt.

  Georgia reached across the table, catching my hand and giving it a squeeze. “It’s okay to feel like this. When we love someone, sometimes it’s hard. You and Cade had it pretty easy back then. Nothing ruffled the surface, so it seemed easy. It’s never easy even when it’s good. Things come up and you have to get through them. You two are way overdue on this one and both of you have some feelings bottled up. Just give it time. Okay?”

  I took a slow breath, the warmth in Georgia’s words filtering through the reflexive anxiety I felt. By no means did I feel great about where things were at, but maybe, just maybe, Cade and I would get through this.

  * * *

  The following evening, I stared across the table at Earl. I’d managed to be polite, but he was pissing me off. At this point, I was wondering how I’d ever even thought he was anything other than an arrogant jerk. I practically had skid marks on my tongue from keeping my mouth shut. The only thing keeping me at the table now was the fact I figured his pride had taken a hit and that was why he was being an ass. I’d give him this dinner and that would be it.

  That said, I was annoyed enough, I couldn’t help but needle him.

  “So, fishing trip, huh?” I asked.

  I didn’t want Earl, but him so easily bouncing back after I left him behind, well, it was sand in an old wound. A wound that had nothing to do with him, yet everything about our failed relationship was like a neon sign pointing to those old feelings of insecurity. Aside from Cade, no man ever made me feel as if I mattered much. To Earl, I mattered so little, I could dump him minutes before our wedding and he shifted gears so fast it was like a spotlight on how little I meant.

  Earl looked across the table at me and shrugged. His mouth hooked at one corner in a grin. As if it was funny somehow.

  “Amelia, you left. What the hell was I supposed to do? You’ve had a bit to cool down, so let’s be real. I don’t know what happened, but we had a good thing. Let’s talk things over and get back to where we were. I think you just freaked because…”

  My blood was boiling. A rushing sound muted the voices around me. I gave my head a shake. Earl reached across the table and grabbed my hand. I shook it off, drawing back.

  “Earl, we’re not getting back to anything. I meant what I said that day. I never should’ve said yes.”

  He stared back at me, his eyes flat and hard to read. Lucy’s comments about his pride were becoming more and more obvious.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Cade

  I rolled my truck to a stop in front of Wildlands. Wildlands Lodge was a wilderness guiding and fishing resort on Willow Brook Street, which ran perpendicular to Main Street with Swan Lake a stone’s throw away. Willow Brook had been named after a small brook running out of the mountains in the distance. It ran alongside its namesake street before meandering its way to Swan Lake. Wildlands had once been just a bar and restaurant. When the town was feeling left out of the oil boom in the eighties, the owners turned their sights on the slew of people moving to the state and the tourists following them. Wildlands was a destination wilderness lodge now, bringing tourists willing to pay crazy money for fishing and guiding in the area.

  It was a modern style wilderness lodge with cedar siding and gorgeous stone chimneys flanking either end of its main building. The hotel portion was in the back with docks adjacent to Swan Lake. I made my way inside, a sense of familiarity washing over me. I’d spent many a night here with friends and with Amelia. The restaurant was packed, crowded with locals and tourists. I scanned the crowd and threaded my way to the bar in the back. The interior had a modern woodsy feel with polished wooden tables scattered throughout and photographs of the Alaskan wilderness and various fishing photos lining the walls.

  I caught sight of Beck over in the corner with a few other guys whom I assumed were firefighters. After weaving through the crowd, I slipped into the chair Beck patted beside him.

  “Hey man, it’s packed here tonight,” I offered in greeting.

  Beck flashed a grin. “This is the way it is all summer now. Ever since they finished the addition to the lodge here, it’s crazy busy.”

  “When did they do that?” I asked.

  “Two summers ago. Added another one hundred rooms. It’s nuts. Anyway, let me introduce you. Guys, this is Cade, the new foreman.” He gestured to a man with dark blonde hair and bright blue eyes. “Levi Phillips is on your crew.” Levi tipped his head in my direction. “Then we have Thad Mason and Jesse Franklin here. These guys are with the crew too. You might remember Thad, but Jesse’s a transplant from Fairbanks.”

  I said my hellos and looked to Thad. “You were a few years behind me in high school, right?”

  Thad nodded and twirled his beer bottle in a circle on the table. “Sure was. Just young enough you guys could ignore me,” he said with a chuckle. He had dark brown hair and eyes to match.

  Beck took the bait and punched him lightly on the shoulder. “Dude, we weren’t ignoring you. We just had eyes for the girls back then. You know how it goes.”

  I glanced to Levi. “Good to meet you, man. How long have you been with the crew here?”

  Levi leaned back in his chair. “About a year. I did my training in Arizona, but I’m from Juneau. When a position opened up here, I jumped on it.”

  Conversation moved on with me getting updates on everything from the new equipment at the station to Beck’s latest ladies drama when he accidentally, according to him, dated two women he hadn’t known were friends. I was midway through my second beer when I happened to see the flash of Amelia’s hair. Her amber hair glinted gold in the lights from above. Even across the crowded room, I felt her presence like a jolt. I couldn’t help but crane my head. The second I did, I regretted it. Earl Osborne was seated across from her.

  I saw red and did my damnedest to shackle the irrational jealousy coursing through me. I forced myself to look away, colliding with Beck’s too-perceptive gaze. Beck arched a brow, a knowing grin curling one corner of his mouth. I shook my head. Beck’s grin faded quickly with a slight nod. Beck might enjoy teasing, but he wasn’t an asshole.

  A waitress passed by us, and as much as I wanted another beer to bury the jealousy chewing me up inside, I declined. The last thing my anger needed was enough alcohol to make me stupid.

  Bar noise hummed around me. I made a strong effort to keep my cool, but it was dicey. I thought I was good enough to get my ass out of there, so I said my goodbyes and stood, tossing a twenty on the table to cover my portion of the tab. I started to make my way through the crowd when my eyes landed on Amelia and Earl. My barely in check jealousy flared when I saw Earl leaning across the table, trying to reach for her hand.

  I went from angry to on fire and shouldered my way over to their table. Amelia’s eyes whipped to mine. “Come on,” I said.

  Earl glanced up, his gaze annoyed. “This is none of your business Cade. I know you and Amelia have some history, but…”

 
Earl made the mistake of reaching for Amelia’s hand again. She drew back, her eyes flashing. “Earl, I already told you. We’re done. Period.”

  “Amelia, you don’t get to…”

  I grabbed Earl by his shirt, yanking him up out of his chair. No easy feat, given Earl was close to my height and plenty strong. But I was beyond angry. My jealousy was now mixed with raw anger at seeing Earl try to push Amelia on anything. “Fucking listen to her. You don’t get to make her talk to you anymore.”

  Earl’s eyes were wide now. Whatever he’d thought about us before, realization appeared to be dawning it might be more than old history. “Oh, you think you can just show up in town and call the shots with her? That’s fucking bullshit. We were getting married. You’re the one who screwed around on her.”

  I drew back and drove my fist into Earl’s face. I didn’t hear a damn thing through the fury buzzing like static in my brain. Earl stumbled back. “What the fuck!”

  Before Earl had a chance to punch me back, Amelia stepped between us, shoving him to the side. Next thing I knew, Beck was at my side pulling me away. “Back off, man. No one needs this,” he murmured, his voice low at my shoulder.

  The sounds around me broke through my fury, and I glanced over to see Amelia in Earl’s face. I couldn’t hear what she was saying, but it was obvious she was pissed. Through the jumble of the next few minutes, Beck dragged me out of the way. Likewise, Earl was pulled out of the way by his brother Dan. I leaned against the wall in the back hallway leading to the restrooms with Beck standing across from me.