Semblance

by Chris E. Saros

  “Hey, you have to turn here. Go right at the light,” Drake directed, and Scotty followed his instructions, flicking on his turn signal.

  The silence stretched, making Drake squirm in his seat. He didn’t like long silences. Especially awkward ones. He could feel his nerves getting the better of him.

  “So,” he said, letting his voice trail off. He hadn’t actually thought of anything to say before he opened his mouth.

  Scotty’s lips curled. “So,” Scotty repeated, his eyes never leaving the road.

  Drake turned back to face the windshield, fingers drumming restlessly on his leg. He tried to think of something to fill the silence.

  “Silences make you uncomfortable?” Scotty asked, making the next turn to head to the outskirts of the city.

  Drake looked up and met Scotty’s golden eyes briefly before Scotty turned his gaze back on the road. “Enjoying the peace and quiet, actually.”

  “Some say that they find my voice melodious.”

  Drake snorted. “Melodious? Really? Where did you pick up that ten-dollar word?”

  Scotty shook his head. “Can I ask you a serious question?”

  “Um.” Drake fidgeted. “I guess so.”

  “Why do we always fight when we talk?”

  Drake looked up in surprise. “Fight? I didn’t realize that was what we were doing. I thought we were just—”

  “Joking, I know.”

  “Flirting, actually,” Drake said before he could stop himself. He felt his cheeks redden at his admission, and he barely contained his impulse to bury his face in his hands.

  Scotty laughed abruptly, making Drake jump. “You are absolutely adorable when you get flustered, d’ya know that?”

  Drake hadn’t known it was possible, but his cheeks burned even hotter. He tilted his head back against the seat. “No, I wasn’t aware of that.”

  “Oh, you are. It’s one of the reasons I pester you so much.”

  “Oh, okay, so the truth comes out. You are the reason we fight so much. Good to know it’s not just because I’m an easy target.”

  “You’re a very easy target. Sometimes you almost make it too easy for me.” Scotty winked at Drake. “Don’t worry, it’s icing on the cake.”

  Drake watched Scotty as he drove. He was beautiful. He had all the qualities that always threw Drake over the edge. He was funny. He had a nice wit on him and was always ready with a comeback. He was serious about his work. As long as Drake had known him, he hadn’t once been late to the club. And this may only have been the first time he ever left work early and it was to help Drake get home, so technically, still working.

  Sometimes you meet people and you feel like you’ve known them forever. Like you feel more relaxed around them than you do other random strangers. Scotty was like that for Drake. But Scotty was a friendly guy. He emitted an approachable vibe, whereas Drake had always given off a “stay the fuck away from me” vibe. But somehow Scotty had managed to ignore Drake’s unpleasant ambiance and now… who knew what could happen?

  Scotty’s golden gaze landed on Drake’s, and he shifted, realizing he was staring.

  “What are you brooding about?” Scotty asked.

  Drake thought about how to answer. He decided to stick with truth. “I am trying really hard to talk myself out of asking you in when we get to my place.”

  “Damn, I thought that might be what you were thinking.”

  A smile broke along Drake’s face. “Yeah?”

  Scotty answered Drake’s smile with one of his own. “I would be lying if I said that the possibility hadn’t crossed my mind.”

  “It would be a mistake, though, wouldn’t it?”

  “Would it?”

  “I am your boss….”

  “If anything, it would look really bad at work.”

  “Not that anyone would need to know.” Drake groaned, rubbing his brow. “What am I saying? It would be a horrible decision. Besides, I have too much going on right now to add another factor.”

  Scotty nodded. “Okay, so we know the attraction is there, but we aren’t going to act on it.”

  “Right.”

  “Right.”

  The silence stretched around them again. Much like last time it was uncomfortable, but this time it had a new awkward tinge to it. Fidgeting, Drake tapped his fingernails on the car door handle. Also, his knee had apparently developed a mind of its own because it was bouncing up and down, and he hadn’t even noticed until it knocked against the dashboard.

  The conversation seemed to awaken something in him, and he was more aware of Scotty’s presence than he had ever been. Suddenly the car was filled with his very essence. Drake couldn’t take a breath without smelling the musky cologne Scotty wore. And it was as if Scotty was radiating his body heat toward him.

  He couldn’t have gotten closer to the car door if he tried. No matter how far away he moved, he could still feel Scotty there. Keeping distance between them became pertinent. It was almost impossible to stop himself from reaching out to touch him.

  “Shit,” he growled, putting both hands on his knees and trying to contain them.

  Scotty didn’t glance over at him. He didn’t acknowledge him at all. Instead, he jerked the steering wheel to the side harshly.

  “What are you doing?” Drake questioned as Scotty pulled the car over to the shoulder and hit the brakes.

  Flinging the gearshift to first and turning the engine off, Scotty launched himself over the console between the seats to press his warm lips along Drake’s in a hard kiss.

  It happened so quickly that it took a moment to process, but it didn’t take him too long to realize that Scotty’s lips were pressed to his with a command for reciprocation. It took even less time for him to react. Without thinking, not wanting thoughts to get in the way of this moment, Drake reached up to pull Scotty closer, opening his lips so Scotty’s tongue could flick along his lips and teeth.

  Drake groaned at the sensation and shifted to get a better angle. Nothing mattered more than deepening the kiss. Nothing existed outside him, Scotty, and the car. All that mattered was that he press himself as close to Scotty as possible.

  He didn’t know how long they stayed that way, locked together, but all too suddenly Scotty pulled back. Teeth grazed along Drake’s bottom lip as they hesitantly drew apart.

  They stared at each other, light golden eyes meeting dark brown ones, chests heaving.

  “Hi,” Scotty said, his breath hot on Drake’s lips.

  Drake licked his own lips, tasting the remainder of Scotty, and smiled. “Hi.”

  They stayed like that for countless seconds. Bodies hot against each other, their breath mingling between them. Reluctantly, Drake pulled farther away, automatically feeling the cold distance.

  “So much for not acting on it.”

  Scotty laughed, ducking his head. “I have wanted to do that since the day I walked into my interview at the club.”

  “What a coincidence, I have been thinking about that since about the moment you walked into your interview at the club.”

  “Now what?” Scotty breathed, still close enough that his breath was hot on Drake’s lips.

  Yeah, now what, Drake? How was he supposed to stay away from Scotty with the taste of him on his lips? How was he supposed to walk away with the memory of his trim, firm body pressed against his? He shouldn’t have allowed it to happen. Because now that he’d had a taste, he was hungry for more.

  “As much as I want to do that again, I don’t know if on the side of the road is the best place.”

  “Hmm,” Scotty moaned plaintively, chastely brushing Drake’s lips once more with his own, before settling back into the driver’s seat.

  As soon as the car was moving again, Drake let out his breath. That had been unexpected. Even more unexpected was the scorching heat still flaring through his body and his frantically beating heart. Jesus, he was reacting as if it had been his first kiss. He hadn’t felt his heart pound that hard since he’d kissed
Brittany Seller in sixth grade. The only other time he could remember feeling this much anticipation and excitement with a single kiss was when he had shared his first stolen kiss with a shy boy after lunch behind the cafeteria when he was fifteen.

  “That…. Uh…,” Drake said, clearing his throat, but he couldn’t continue. He had no idea what to say. He turned back to face out the front.

  Scotty kept his gaze fixed on the road, but his hands tightened on the wheel “My place is up the road here.” Drake tried to form the words around anxious lips. “Those condos up on the left. Turn in the first drive, then park anywhere.”

  Scotty followed Drake’s instructions and parked in an empty spot closest to the door. As soon as the car was parked, Drake was across the console. This time he quickly unbuckled his seat belt and lunged across to capture Scotty’s mouth with his. Squirming his way over, he fought for space, struggling to fit himself tight against Scotty, the steering wheel jabbing into him as he found himself practically cradled in Scotty’s lap, both his hands back in Scotty’s silky hair.

  A warm, eager hand slid up his back, and Drake groaned as Scotty’s fingers splayed along his torso, exploring the muscles while at the same time pressing Drake closer. Scotty rubbed up and down hungrily, and then when he found the hem of Drake’s shirt, he hesitantly lifted it to press his hand to Drake’s skin.

  “Oh God,” Drake murmured, shifting so Scotty could pull his shirt up farther. Tilting his head, Scotty trailed his lips along his neck, nipping at his skin.

  Needing to get closer, Drake removed one hand from the soft tangle of Scotty’s hair to brush his own hands along Scotty’s chest. He let his fingers wander down the front of him. Enjoying each curve of hard muscle, he grazed down, down, past his stomach, past his belt. He kept his hand moving until he could cup the hard bulge.

  Scotty gasped as Drake fondled him through his jeans. Pulling back slightly, Scotty reached so he could once again press his lips to Drake’s. Almost involuntarily, Scotty pushed his hips up, rubbing himself on Drake’s hand.

  It had been a long time since Drake had messed around with someone in a car. He’d forgotten how uncomfortable it was to try to maneuver around all the obstacles. But it added a challenge as well. Drake grinned against Scotty’s lips as he moved to get a better grip on him.

  Now it was Drake’s turn to gasp as his own bulge was grasped through thick material. Using his teeth, he nipped softly at Scotty’s lips and tongue, making him groan in pleasure.

  Drake tilted his head back at the pressure of his dick being rubbed through his pants. His hips moved with the sensation, pushing at Scotty’s hand. Needing more, Drake squeezed himself between Scotty and the steering wheel. Keeping their mouths pressed together, he blindly searched for the lever to push the driver’s seat back. Scotty scooted up the seat back, giving Drake enough room to move until he was straddling Scotty. It allowed them both easy access, which they took advantage of without hesitation.

  Scotty’s mouth sought Drake’s as he bucked under him, grinding his bulge along Drake’s. At the touch, Drake growled and pushed Scotty’s hips down so he could rub himself along him. Scotty fought Drake’s hold, but Drake held fast, not letting the other man move, only subjecting him to exactly what he wanted him to feel.

  “We should… get… inside,” Scotty managed to moan.

  Drake pulled back, blinking. He had totally forgotten they were in his car. He had lost track of everything around them. All he had been able to focus on was the feel of Scotty’s body around him, under him. It had clouded his head, made him forget.

  Forget.

  Shit! What the hell was he doing? He wasn’t supposed to be making out with Scotty. He was supposed to be getting a ride from him and then finding a safe passage for him to get home. But here he was, straddling Scotty, who didn’t seem to mind, in the middle of his parking lot. How could he do that when a few miles away a kid was being killed for something that Drake had done? No, it wasn’t right. As much as an empty head and Scotty’s warm skin wrapped around him felt fantastic, he couldn’t allow himself the luxury.

  Shaking his head, Drake pushed back into the passenger seat. “I’m sorry.”

  “You’re sorry?” Scotty breathed. “Trust me, you don’t have anything to be sorry for.”

  “We weren’t going to act on it. I totally jumped you.”

  Scotty laughed. “If I recall correctly, I believe I jumped you first.”

  Drake couldn’t drag his eyes away from Scotty, who on a regular day was beautiful enough to keep your attention and was now still writhing from the throes of desire. He was still leaning back in his seat awkwardly, as if Drake were still straddling him, his eyes half-lidded and filled with a burning fire.

  It wasn’t a good idea. Drake was bad news, especially for someone as close to the fire as Scotty. He worked in the damn club. There was no telling what could happen to him if for some reason, Frankie, Tony, Boredega, or any of the guys caught wind of what Drake was doing. He would be putting Scotty directly into the crosshairs if they got close.

  The thought of Frankie getting ahold of Scotty cooled Drake’s blood. Even though the only thing he wanted to do at the moment was drag him inside to have his way with him, he couldn’t do it. It was far too dangerous.

  Scotty’s contented face fell into a frown as he watched Drake’s internal struggle. He sat up slowly, his frown deepening.

  “We aren’t going to do this, are we?”

  Taking a deep breath, Drake answered, “No, we aren’t.”

  “Does this have to do with you being my boss? Because I can look past that. It really doesn’t bother me.”

  “It does have to do with that,” Drake said, holding up a hand when Scotty began to protest. “But that’s not all of it. I wasn’t lying when I said I have a lot going on right now.”

  “It doesn’t have to be anything serious.”

  Drake closed his eyes, shaking his head. “Did any of that feel like it was going to lead to something that wasn’t serious?”

  Scotty searched Drake’s face, surprise evident in his eyes. His gaze finally landed on Drake’s with glum resignation. He shook his head and said in a reserved, almost blank-sounding voice, “No, it definitely felt like something.”

  Drake nodded, swallowing hard. “I think it would be best if we left it at this for the time being.”

  “Okay,” Scotty said a little breathlessly as he fumbled with the car door. He pushed it open and got out, slamming it behind him. Drake opened his own door and exited the car. He glanced over at Scotty, who, much to his surprise, was pacing with his hand in his hair. He didn’t even seem to register that Drake was watching him as he went through his own inner turmoil. Drake let his gaze follow him for a couple of moments before clearing his throat.

  “I can call you a cab. I don’t know how far you are from here, so I will definitely pay your way.”

  Scotty looked up blankly, as if he hadn’t even heard him speak. “Hmm, oh, no, it’s not necessary. I, uh, don’t actually live too far from here. I can catch the train, or, er, get a ride. No biggie.”

  “You sure you don’t want me to call an Uber?”

  “Um, no, like I said, it’s not far from here,” Scotty said, backing up toward the sidewalk. “So, I think I can make it. I, uh. I’ll see you at work tomorrow.”

  Scotty turned quickly and basically ran from him. “Hey, Scotty,” he called. Scotty turned back to face him. Drake smiled sadly. “Thank you for driving me home. I really appreciate it.”

  Scotty gave a quick salute before turning back around to walk quickly away. Drake watched his retreating figure and couldn’t help but feel sad at the sight. He wasn’t exactly sure what was wrong with him, but it hurt to watch Scotty leave, especially leaving it the way they were. Ignoring the fluttering in his stomach, Drake forced himself to turn away from Scotty’s diminishing figure. But he couldn’t help but feel as if he had just made a mistake.

  Chapter 4

  THERE WASN’T e
nough scotch in the world to make Drake feel any better. It was as if the door to his condo was the entryway to a different dimension, one where there was nothing but the nagging, condemning voices in his head. While turning Scotty away was the smartest decision he could have made, it meant he was alone, in the quiet, with nothing to do but drink scotch and nothing to think about except Frankie disposing of Willy’s body.

  Everything about the last couple of days came flooding back into focus, overwhelming him. The images, the stress, and the guilt plagued him as he paced in tight circles in his walk-in closet.

  His clothes were tightly squished on their hangers, bunched close together at the front of his closet where he had shoved them to open a space on the wall at the back. A whiteboard was bolted to the closet wall, with pictures, newspaper articles, and notes plastered on and around it. Drake frowned at the board as he paced.

  He had been gathering information on the cartel since he was a teenager, and in order to understand it at its fullest, he had needed to lay it all out. Much like a crime board you could see on any procedural drama TV show, he had pictures of people and places stuck around with black lines spiderwebbing them together. Each picture told a story in and of itself, but placed on the board, it shed a new light on the complete and ever-evolving tale.

  Everything Drake knew about the Boredega operation, every bit of knowledge he had been able to learn or squeeze out of his contacts was arranged in the detailed collage. The pictures and lines told a story, created a world, one that was invisible to the average person, but once you saw it, it was everywhere. That world had its own solar system, and like a solar system, it all centered around one point of power.

  Boredega.

  The cartel had connections everywhere and with everything. At least, that was how Drake saw it now. The cartel had fingers in the local governments, the state governments, and possibly in the federal government. Boredega could function practically in invulnerability because there wasn’t a department that was willing to try to take him down. He had connections that went up the ladder as well as connections with the lowest of the underworld. It went as far as no one knowing for certain who the actual Boredega was, besides the few men who worked directly with him, or so Drake assumed.