Gotta Have It

by Lori Wilde

  “Ow!” Tess glared and hopped around on one foot, grossly exaggerating the slight injury.

  Abby sent her a look that said, serves you right for interfering in my love life.

  Durango’s grin widened. “And you were going to be satisfied with just shaking my hand? You haven’t changed a bit, Angel. Still holding back. Still keeping your emotions under wraps.”

  “I don’t think that’s…” Abby began, but got no further.

  “Come ’ere.” He strode forward, encircled her in a bear hug and lifted her off her feet.

  Oh, my.

  Contact with his hard, masculine body threw her into a tailspin. Her breasts were smashed flat against his broad, honed chest. He smelled delightfully of wind and sun and leather.

  His muscles rippled as he squeezed her tight. His hair tickled her ear. His chin made contact with her cheek and the slight scrape of beard stubble shoved her long-dormant libido into overdrive.

  She wanted him.

  Badly.

  Abby froze. She remembered now, with distinct clarity, why she hadn’t taken his side all those years ago when everyone in Silverton Heights had turned against him.

  She’d been too afraid.

  The strength of his life force was just too overwhelming, his passion too raw, his intensity too intimidating for her to handle. She had been the good girl with the stark dread of ending up bad, just like her incorrigible mother.

  Durango kept holding her. His big laugh rumbled intoxicatingly in her ears, his ebony eyes sparkling with devilment, his exhilarating scent blinding her to any other smell.

  No.

  She would not allow herself to get swept away by the force of his energy. She would just wait him out. Eventually he would have to put her feet back on the ground.

  It was like waiting out a hurricane.

  He just kept standing there. Holding her.

  Abby didn’t move. She most certainly did not hug him in return, but his embrace transported her back in time.

  In her mind’s eye, she saw the sexually repressed young girl she had once been longing to explore the red-hot passion surging through her veins but was too scared to act. That’s why she’d kept fantasizing about Durango all these years. Because he was the flame she hadn’t been brave enough to extinguish.

  At last, Durango set her down and stepped away to eye her once more.

  “You look amazing,” he said huskily.

  She dropped her gaze. So do you, she yearned to say but prudently murmured, “Thank you.”

  “You still living in Phoenix?” His face was lively with interest, his body language compelling.

  “Uh-huh.”

  “She’s still living in her father’s house.” Tess rolled her eyes. “Of course, she was getting married, but that deal sort of fell through. The groom ditched her for a stripper on their wedding day. Thank heavens. Ken was all wrong for her.”

  “Ken Rockford?” Durango cleared his throat.

  At the private high school in Silverton Heights that they’d all three attended, Durango and Ken had been archenemies, with Ken the class president and football quarterback to Durango’s rebel without a cause, smoking in the boys’ room.

  Abby nodded but didn’t look at him. Gee thanks, Tess, for making things so much more awkward.

  Durango snorted but said nothing. An uncomfortable silence fell.

  “I’m Tess, by the way.” Tess stepped forward to shake his hand. “Remember me? I was away at boarding school when you and Abby were dating, but we met at your father’s annual Christmas party that year.”

  “Didn’t you used to be a blonde?” he asked.

  “Yep, and a brunette before that and once I did the tricolor blond-brunette-red-hair thing. So I guess you could say I was a calico.” She shrugged. “I’m not like Abby who’s had the same tame hairstyle all her life. I get bored easily.”

  Durango laughed. “I like you, Tess.”

  “I like you too, Durango.”

  Dammit, was Tess flirting with him? And criticizing her hairdo to boot? Abby experienced a flick of jealousy so hot and quick it startled her.

  “Are we going to do this vortex thing or not?” she snapped, irritated with herself because she sounded jealous.

  “Sure, sure.” Durango nodded. “Who’s calling shotgun?”

  “Abby is!” Tess said.

  “Or we could both just sit in the back.”

  “No, no, you two need to catch up on old times,” Tess announced, and shoved Abby toward the passenger side of the Jeep.

  “No, really, there’s no need. I’m happy with the back,” Abby argued.

  But Durango was getting behind the wheel and Tess was sprawled out across the back seat.

  Move over, Abby mouthed silently.

  Tess shook her head.

  Abby waggled her finger at her. I’m going to get even with you for this.

  Saucily, Tess stuck out her tongue.

  Durango started the engine, leaving Abby no choice except to climb into the passenger seat beside him.

  She stopped short when she spied a credo medallion dangling from the rearview mirror. The silver lettering against the red background caught the sun and glinted enticingly.

  Freefall, it read.

  Freefall. Didn’t that just about sum up Durango? And her fantasies concerning him.

  Her dreams always involved an element of danger and risk. In her reveries, he was usually a virile pirate or a black-hearted bandit or a lawless mercenary.

  She remembered his hot kisses, how they’d both frightened and thrilled her. She recalled the way his fevered hand had felt sliding up underneath her shirt, expertly unhooking her bra. She recollected how he’d shocked her young sensibilities by pressing the length of his male hardness against her yearning thigh. She could not forget the way her heart had pounded and how much it had scared her. This desperate wanting.

  And it appeared nothing had changed!

  I am not giving in to desire. I’m not like my mother. I’m a controlled person. I am. I am. I am. This had been her solemn mantra in high school and it was still her mantra now.

  So why did she suddenly feel like she was in an irrevocable tailspin?

  Abby sneezed into a tissue and then fastened her seat belt. She dropped her hands into her lap and struggled to get her heart rate under control. She had had no concept that seeing Durango again would affect her so profoundly.

  Of course if she hadn’t been ambushed by Tess’s subterfuge, she would have been more prepared for their meeting, more in control of her emotions, more patient with her distressing reaction. She shot a glance back at her wily friend, who had her face tilted up to the morning sun and was grinning one of those sneaky Cheshire-cat grins of hers.

  And damn if she wasn’t softly humming, Sheryl Crow’s “All I Wanna Do.”

  Abby knew the message Tess was sending. Just relax and have some fun. But how could she relax when her entire world had just tilted off its axis?

  Durango put the Jeep in gear, shot around the paved circular driveway and out of the gate. Abby clutched at her hat to keep it from flying off. She could literally feel his sexual energy.

  The man was potent. She had to give him that. Testosterone shimmered off him in waves.

  But did she really want to explore his…um…potency?

  The chemistry was still there. No denying. Bubbling, sizzling, churning. Scarier than ever.

  You know that’s why you want him. Because he’s not safe. Because he is taboo.

  Good grief. Why was Cassandra’s voice tap-dancing around in her head?

  She could feel the current of sexuality swirling around them, a compelling nexus of desire. But was a wild fling really the answer to ending the sexual fantasies she could not shake? Or would seducing this man open up a whole new can of hurt?

  She slipped her sunglasses back on and coolly said, “So what exactly is a vortex?”

  He turned his head to smile at her, and her heart, which had just begun to settl
e down, kicked back into high gear. If the man could bottle that grin the world’s fuel problems would be solved.

  “Essentially it’s the energy of the earth.”

  “Oookay.”

  “The energy can be magnetic, electric or electromagnetic. The magnetic vortices are considered masculine, the feminine are electric and the electromagnetic are neutral.”

  “Which one of those are we going to?” Abby asked, and caught herself studying his large, masculine hands as he clutched the steering wheel.

  He had such nice, long, broad fingers. She recollected how those same fingers had once tickled the underside of her throat while his hot, wet tongue had eagerly explored her ear.

  Magnetic, indeed.

  “We’re going to Cathedral Rock first. It’s a feminine vortex.”

  “What’s supposed to happen there?”

  “Maybe nothing.” Durango shrugged. “It all depends on what you’re looking for. Some people come to Sedona for spiritual growth. Others arrive searching for health and emotional well-being. Still others find themselves at a crossroad in their lives and they’re seeking guidance. Sedona is a good place to turn inward and find out what you really want.”

  That’s me. I’m at a crossroad.

  And she had no idea what it was she really wanted out of life.

  “What kind of guidance can these earth energies give you?” she asked, her curiosity piqued.

  “If you let yourself feel the power, they can guide you anywhere you want to go.”

  “Sounds cryptic,” Tess piped up.

  “It’s an individual experience. If you’re attuned, the vortex can lead you to balance and harmony in your life. Or it can point the way to an important career change. It can help you in your relationships or it can set you on the path to heightened awareness.”

  “What about sex?” Tess asked.

  “I’m for it,” Durango said.

  Tess giggled. “Me too. But what I’ve heard is that vortex energy can enhance your sex life.”

  Durango chuckled. His laugh was low and sensuous and snaked a fissure of that very heightened awareness right up Abby’s spinal column. “If that’s what you need. Sure, why not?”

  “I’m betting the electromagnetic vortices are the sexiest, right?” Tess sat up and leaned over the front seat.

  “I never really thought of it that way,” Durango said. “But, yeah, I suppose those would be considered the sexiest vortices. Concurrent flow and all that.”

  “Do you really believe the vortices have such influential power?” Abby asked.

  “Not at all,” he said. “The power is within you. The vortex is just a channel, funneling energy into whatever you bring to it. Positive or negative. Light or dark. Passionate or dispassionate.”

  Abby swallowed. “All this sounds pretty out there. New Agey. Weird.”

  And not at all like the old Durango she used to know. That young rebel had been full of torment and anger. He was different now. More relaxed, more philosophical, more sure of his place in the world. Plus, he didn’t seem to hold the slightest grudge against her for turning against him all those years ago. That was really nice. She approved of the changes in him.

  Durango leaned over and placed the flat of his broad thumb in the center of her forehead. “Open your mind, Abby. The world is a much bigger place than your father’s circle of influence.”

  She stared at him, her forehead tingling from his touch. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “You figure it out.” Durango’s enigmatic black eyes challenged her to go beyond the tried-and-true. He was so busy watching her that he missed his turn-off and had to corner quickly.

  The tires squealed. Abby sucked in her breath and clutched the hand rest.

  The credo medallion flew off the rearview mirror and dropped into her lap.

  Freefall.

  With shaky fingers, Abby slipped the medallion back over the mirror.

  “Yee-ha!” Tess said from the back seat. “That was fun.”

  “Just checking to see if you were awake,” Durango joked.

  They turned down Back O’ Beyond Road. It seemed an appropriate name encircled as they were by miles and miles of the majestic red rocks. Abby had to admit there was something incredibly special about those rock mesas. No matter what you were doing, you invariably felt your eyes drawn to them.

  There were other Jeeps on the road. Other tours. They drove for a while longer and then Durango found a place to park.

  “We walk from here,” he said, strapping on his backpack.

  The weather was temperate. A good fifteen degrees cooler than in Phoenix. The sun was bright but not overpowering. The air was peaceful. Quiet.

  Abby couldn’t believe that she had lived out her entire life in Phoenix and had never once made the short two-hour trek to Sedona. She didn’t have much time for vacations. She stayed too busy with her job and running her father’s household and helping out with his political campaigns. And whenever she did take time off, she usually preferred cruising the Caribbean to checking out local hot spots.

  Just think, all this time, Durango was only two hours away and you never knew.

  Her heart lurched oddly. Why did that realization make her feel so sad?

  The world is a much bigger place than your father’s circle of influence. Durango’s words echoed in her head.

  He led the way up the trail. They’d only gone half a mile before Tess started bitching. “How come nobody told me there’d be so much walking.”

  “I did suggest you might not want to wear high-heeled sandals.” Abby shook her head.

  “But hiking shoes blow my sexy image.” Tess pouted.

  “It’s not too much farther,” Durango said.

  “Why don’t they build roads right up to the vortex?” Tess whined. “For us couch potatoes.”

  “That would kinda ruin the whole point of nature,” Abby pointed out.

  They passed a few other hikers on their trek up the rock. Tess finally ended up pulling off her shoes and padding after them barefoot. The sound of her feet slapping against the red sandstone echoed softly throughout the canyon.

  When they came to a large flat rock in the middle of the path, Tess plunked herself down on it.

  “You guys go ahead.” She waved a hand. “I just wanna sit here and rest a minute.”

  “We’ll wait with you,” Abby said and perched beside her. The last thing she wanted to do was be alone with Durango.

  “I really want to be by myself. To meditate.”

  Abby stared at her. “Since when do you meditate?”

  “Since I found out Colin Cruz is deep into Eastern philosophy. Now, do you mind?” Tess made shooing motions at them. “Scram.”

  She knew what her friend was up to and, while Tess thought she had her best interest at heart, Abby wasn’t the least bit grateful.

  “Abby?” Durango raised a questioning eyebrow and cocked his head in the direction of the summit. “How ’bout we give Tess some space.”

  Okay, fine. Blowing out her breath, Abby slid off the rock and reluctantly followed Durango up the trail. So much for the quiet, tranquil buttes of Sedona.

  “You and Tess are total opposites,” Durango said to Abby when they were out of earshot. “How have you stayed friends for so long?”

  “Tess is something of a character,” Abby conceded. “She’s a lot of fun to be around.”

  “And you’re the ground wire.”

  “I guess you could say that.”

  They reached the top and, just as they were going up, a camera-wielding, balding, paunchy, middle-aged man wearing Bermuda shorts, a Van Halen T-shirt and black sandals with plaid socks was coming down.

  “I looked all over this damned rock and couldn’t find hide nor hair of that stupid vortex,” he was muttering under his breath.

  “A vortex isn’t something you see,” Durango told him. “It’s an energy field. You have to feel it.”

  The guy snorted, mumbled something
about New Age fruitcakes and took off down the trail.

  “Well, he was friendly,” Abby said. “Not.”

  “People like him show up all the time. They’re usually from a big city. Rushed, in a hurry, looking for a short cut to inner peace. They hear about the restorative power of the vortex and they think it’s a ticket to instant enlightenment. But there’s no such thing.”

  Abby cocked her head and studied him. He looked at peace and she was happy for him. “You seem to have come a long way in the enlightenment department.”

  “Hey, it was either get peaceful or drive myself nuts holding on to grudges.”

  “Did you have a grudge against me?” she dared to ask him.

  “What do you think?”

  “I’m thinking yes.”

  He nodded. “I was pretty hurt at the time. I thought we were working on something special, but it turned out I was wrong. Just goes to show you how foolish teenagers can be.”

  “Not totally foolish,” she said huskily.

  “No?”

  “I thought we were working on something special, too.”

  He eyed her speculatively. “But when the going got tough and you got going…”

  “What can I say?” She shrugged and tried not to let him see how much her lack of faith in him still bothered her. “I was a scared kid.”

  “You’re not a kid anymore.”

  “No.”

  “But you’re still scared.” There was that grin of his again, more wicked than ever.

  The sun beat down. The air was alive with electricity. Abby felt something then. She didn’t know if it was the famous vortex energy or if it was energy of a much more tangible kind, but her skin prickled and her nerve endings tingled.

  Durango’s chest was rising and falling in a rapid rhythm that matched her own edgy breathing.

  A tangle of complicated emotions skirled inside her, spiraling outward in an expanding circle, drawing her to him.

  Their eyes met and the moment was straight out of some romantic movie. His gaze locked with hers and Abby couldn’t catch her breath. Her chest literally hurt with the intensity of wanting him.

  The vortex was sucking her in. Pulling her down into a place she wasn’t so sure she wanted to go.

  Run! Run! cried the cautious side she’d inherited from her father.