Salvation Station

by Kathryn Schleich

  Susannah was tentative in her question. “Why is it so important for The Road to Calvary to be a success then? You actually could have ended the program and been quite comfortable.”

  Ray leaned back in his chair. “I put a lot of my own money into funding this program. We were still losing substantial amounts, at which point I knew we couldn’t keep going. I also felt it wasn’t fair to Jeff or Buck to keep stringing them along when they were working two jobs. Then you came into my life and gave plenty of good reasons why we should continue.” He reached for her hand again, squeezing it tenderly. “We still have work to do before the show is solvent, and I think a larger worship space will allow us to achieve that.”

  “You are a genuine gentleman and a true believer, Ray Williams. I am so lucky to have found you.” She smiled through her tears.

  “The Road to Calvary provides the opportunity to spread the Word of God to more people than I ever dreamed. This is my mission, and I want us to continue it as partners. I also want us to be financially secure.”

  Susannah rose and walked to where Ray sat. She slid into his lap, putting her arms around his neck. “I love the way you say that.” They kissed deeply, lost in the tenderness of the moment.

  34

  MONDAY, MARCH 31 LINCOLN, NEBRASKA NORTHEAST POLICE HEADQUARTERS

  Ten months, seemingly a lifetime, had dragged by since the Hansen murders, and the fact that the LPD seemed no closer to solving them hung over Linda like an invisible weight or a self-inflicted burden. There were newer crimes to occupy her attention, and she had a team of seven to manage.

  She kept trying to comprehend the unthinkable—a mother killing her children. Although Linda knew she shouldn’t, she couldn’t help researching other women who had committed the same inconceivable act, desperately trying to figure out the thought processes of Susan Smith, who had driven her young boys, still strapped into their car seats, into a South Carolina lake in 1994; or in 2001, when Andrea Yates had methodically drowned all five of her children in Texas. There had to be a common link with Nicole Hansen’s motive. She needed to crawl inside her mind to understand the rationale of a homicidal mother.

  SATURDAY, APRIL 12, 2003 ST. LOUIS, MISSOURI THE ROAD TO CALVARY BUILDING

  Ray took a long drink of coffee for fortification before he spoke with Buck and Jeff. He wasn’t sure if the feeling in his stomach was nerves at sharing details of the wedding and capital campaign with them or his failure at making an omelet that morning. Susannah had left him on his own as she had an appointment for her final wedding dress fitting. He thought with anticipation that she would be the most beautiful of brides.

  Fresh paint permeated the air because Ray had wanted to brighten the set for the Easter broadcast.

  “One thing I do not want is any technical wizardry,” he said, motioning to Buck. “Just a straightforward, joyful Easter celebration. I’ve sent an email to Ryan, and we’ll run through rehearsal Saturday morning. But there’s something else I want to discuss with both of you.”

  Ray could see curiosity on each man’s face. “When Karl Wilcox donated this building, he also bequeathed the vacant lot next door. That’s nearly three acres of land surrounding the structure so we would have the means to expand. And I’m pleased to tell you, we are at that point. Susannah and I have met with an architect to start drawing up plans for the worship space.”

  There was absolute silence; Buck and Jeff stared at Ray as though he were speaking a foreign language.

  Disappointed at their lack of enthusiasm, Ray furrowed his brow. “Do either of you have anything to say?”

  Buck’s chair squeaked as his weight shifted, and he looked at Jeff, who squirmed uncomfortably. “Jeff and I are trying to process all of this.”

  Jeff nodded in concurrence.

  Buck’s voice took on a pained edge. “This is a huge decision, Ray, and you didn’t even ask for our input. We’ve worked with you a long time, sometimes making great sacrifices so the program would succeed, and this is the thanks we get?”

  What Ray was hearing was outrageous. He tried to keep his voice even, but knew it was betraying him. “Now wait a minute, Buck. You make it sound as if we deliberately left you out. For all the years you’ve worked for me, both you and Jeff have had other jobs. I didn’t want to overwhelm you. We were trying to get plans in place before we told you.”

  Buck balled a fist on the table. “Aren’t we getting ahead of ourselves? We’re finally bringing in a healthy income, hiring additional staff, and making a name for ourselves. But can we afford to build a new space? And what would become of this building?”

  Jeff coughed nervously. “Where are we gonna get the kind of money it takes to build a new church? What’s wrong with what we got?”

  Before Ray could answer, Buck shot off another question, waving his arms. “There’s the loan you took out in your name to pay for necessities when we moved into this building. With another, much larger loan, that’s going to be a lot of debt—”

  Ray held up his hands as if he was surrendering. “Whoa, gentlemen! You need to hear me out.”

  Buck and Jeff both sat up straight, their complete attention directed at Ray.

  “Okay,” Buck said. “We’re listening.”

  “The twenty-five thousand dollar loan I took out has been paid off—”

  “With what?” Jeff demanded.

  Buck agreed. “We have a right to know how finances are being handled.”

  Ray’s voice took on a reprimanding tone. “It’s a business matter that’s taken care of.”

  Ray hadn’t anticipated the conversation going this direction. He almost expected to see Buck and Jeff’s breath steam with the hostile chill in the air.

  Jeff leaned into the table. “Before we start talkin’ about spending money we don’t got, there’s somethin’ else we wanna talk to you about.”

  Ray could feel the flush of testiness rising in his cheeks. What the hell is going on here? The campaign is good news! He chose to ignore Jeff and focused on the campaign. “This is a marvelous opportunity for us! After all the time we’ve spent struggling, I thought you’d be excited.”

  Buck coughed into the curve of his elbow. “As Jeff said, there’s something else we want to discuss with you that doesn’t have anything to do with launching a fundraising campaign.”

  The pastor stared down the length of the table at the concerned faces of his employees. “All right, let’s have it.”

  Jeff spoke again, his words coming quickly. “It’s about Susannah. She ain’t the woman she says she is, Ray. We think she’s stolen someone else’s identity—”

  Ray stood up, nearly knocking his chair over. He paced back and forth in the cramped space. “That is absolute nonsense! How dare you—”

  Boom! Buck slapped his clenched fist hard against the table. “Ray! It’s time you hear us out. We have mounting proof. We don’t want to see you get hurt or worse. Please. Just listen to what Jeff and I have to say.”

  Arms rigidly folded across his chest, eyes glowering, Ray said tersely, “Tell me.”

  “Hey, I’m sorry to interrupt, but is everything okay? I could hear raised voices down the hall.” Susannah stood in the doorway, the soothing honeyed tones of her voice filling the room.

  Ray spoke abruptly to Buck and Jeff, the anger mounting in his voice. “Why don’t you gentlemen tell Susannah what you were telling me?”

  All he got was strained silence. Ray felt himself seething, waiting for one of them to speak. “Well, if you won’t tell her, I will. My darling, Susannah, Buck and Jeff here believe you have stolen another person’s identity and are not the woman you say you are.”

  She smiled warmly at the disturbed faces, making herself comfortable among the men. “You have the story backwards. It was my identity that was stolen, following my divorce. It’s literally taken years to get my good name back, and the stress of the situation is a small part of why I let alcohol take over my life.” She steeled herself, grasping Ray’s hand to
continue. “All they needed to open charge accounts was my social security number, which they got by breaking into my house. I had to dig myself out of a mountain of debt I hadn’t created and prove my identity had been taken by someone else. I was already dealing with the deaths of my children and a divorce, which were the beginning of my emotional collapse.”

  She paused, looking Buck and Jeff squarely in the eye, no tears, but her eyes glistened. “I appreciate that you’re both leery of me because of the way I showed up here, and believe me, I understand. If I were either of you, I’d be suspicious, too. I have found true happiness with Ray, and my hope is that as we move into a new phase of our lives, you’ll be a part of that.”

  As he beamed at Susannah, so proud to soon call her his wife, Ray observed his friends. He wanted to still be angry at them, but he knew they were not trying to cause him pain.

  “I guess we owe you an apology,” Buck said with a deep sigh. “I’m sorry we doubted you.”

  “Me too,” Jeff acknowledged. “We made a mistake. Let’s move on. Tell us your ideas for a capital campaign.”

  Ray’s rigid face melted into a warm smile as he stroked Susannah’s knuckles. “Susannah has come up with a terrific name for the campaign—the Growing in Christ Campaign. We want to officially launch after Easter.”

  “How much are you plannin’ on raisin’ for this campaign?” Jeff asked.

  “We’ll see what the architect has in mind. I want a beautiful place of worship, but not too extravagant. For a 17,000-square-foot addition, the architect estimates two and a half million dollars,” Ray countered, still caressing Susannah’s hand.

  “Of course, that doesn’t include the architect’s fees, which we estimate will be around three hundred thousand dollars.” Susannah smiled.

  Buck coughed again. “Wow—that’s a lot of space and money. This campaign could take years. I’m not convinced the congregation is big enough for either.”

  Next to him, Jeff nodded in agreement.

  “But we’re growing,” Ray said. “Increasing numbers are attending in person and watching us on TV. We’ll set a goal of two and a half million dollars and see where we are in a year.”

  “And then what?” Jeff wanted an answer.

  Susannah pulled her hand from Ray’s, spreading them wide. “God will let us know where we need to go. We want everyone to feel a part of this campaign, and to do that, we’ll offer opportunities for congregation members to purchase things—a pew for instance—and as a donor, their name will be inscribed on a plaque. It gives members a sense of ownership.”

  Ray studied Buck and Jeff. As they contemplated this new development, he thought Buck remained agitated. He couldn’t sit still and kept bouncing a knee under the table. After a long moment, Buck spoke. “Do you want our feedback on any of this, or is the deal done?”

  Ray kept his tone measured. “Now, Buck, don’t say it like that. We want your opinion on the new building; but as far as actually raising money, Susannah and I have that mapped out. And I’m hopeful a successful campaign will allow you both to come on board full time.” He touched Susannah’s hand again, grinning. “But there is something else we want to share with you.”

  Then, he had an epiphany. His employees and friends had given themselves wholly to his enterprise, his ministry. Ray recognized that Buck and Jeff were jealously protecting what was a huge part of their lives. Their actions also explained this nonsense of accusing Susannah of committing identity theft. They were fearful of the unknown, and Ray understood he would have to be cautious.

  Ray gently introduced the next subject. “After much thought and prayer, Susannah and I feel it would be good to broadcast the wedding. KNSL has agreed, but of course, they’re not doing it for free. This is a new beginning for Susannah and me, and The Road to Calvary. We do this right, and there will be other benefits.”

  “Such as a bump in the ratings,” Buck said.

  “Yes,” Ray acknowledged, noting the tinge of sarcasm in his voice. “To be clear, no funds from the Growing in Christ Campaign will be used—I will spend my own money for the broadcast.”

  “It’s just surprising, you know, having a personal event like your wedding on TV. Being the groom three times, I honestly can’t imagine broadcasting my nuptials,” Buck said. “Walk us through your plan, so we understand what’s expected of us.”

  Everyone had calmed down, and the discussion focused on promotion. As he listened carefully to Buck and Jeff, Ray’s thoughts kept returning to their assertion Susannah was using a stolen identity. What on earth would make them think such a thing? To Ray, she had honestly acknowledged the tension with the other two men early on and tried to rectify it. It was typical human nature, he mused. Buck and Jeff, as much as he cared for them, would have to adapt to the transitions that would benefit their futures—or they would part ways.

  35

  LATER THE SAME DAY ST. LOUIS, MISSOURI OUTSIDE THE ROAD TO CALVARY BUILDING

  In the open air of the parking lot standing by their cars, Jeff and Buck intently watched the building entrance for signs of Ray and Susannah.

  Jeff cocked his head toward the door. “So, you believe her?”

  Buck fiddled with his earring. “No, not for a second. I never thought I’d see Ray so angry and defensive. Nothing we can say will ever convince him that Susannah is anything short of perfection.”

  “Our best hope is that Malachi finds incriminatin’ stuff on her.” Jeff let out a breath.

  “You realize Ray damn nearly fired us, right?” Buck put his hands on his hips. “Or if he didn’t, he will if we ever bring this up again. No, Jeff—I’m sorry, buddy, but if you want to continue taking risks to find out her real identity, you’re on your own.”

  Jeff stood there, shielding his eyes from the brightness of the setting sun, trying to see his friend through the hazy light. “But you said yourself, ya don’t trust her.”

  “I don’t. But this has gone on long enough. Everything we’ve tried has led to a dead end or turned out to be more complicated than we thought. I want to move on before we find ourselves in real trouble. I’m starting to look for another part-time job. You can wait on Malachi, but I’m done.”

  Jeff’s shoulders sagged in disappointment. “You really thinkin’ about leavin’?”

  “I’ve put some feelers out. Let’s face it—once they’re married, Susannah’s going to be in a position of power, and every step we take will be watched. You said so yourself. Maybe you do want to reenlist with the army. That’s risky, too, but at least you know what you’re up against. With Ray, and soon Susannah, we have no idea what we’re fighting.”

  Jeff straightened to his full height. “Buck, damn it, we’ve been friends with Ray a long time. And you and I been friends a good long time, too.” Jeff knew he was desperate; his voice was close to begging. “That’s one of the reasons we can’t desert Ray and just walk away. The other is that talkin’ to Malachi about those unsolved murders of the pastor and his kids in Nebraska turned something over in me. I wanna know if Susannah was involved in these killings, Buck. I’ll be goddamned if I’m gonna stand back and pretend this woman isn’t up to somethin’ terrible. You’re a good guy. Don’t leave. You might not say it, but you want the truth just as bad as me. If nothin’ else, think about those little kids.” Jeff felt completely spent, his body a limp rag. “Please, Buck.”

  Buck transferred his weight from one foot to the other, gazing at the dirty cement parking lot. “You’re right,” he said, raising his eyes to his friend. “We can’t endanger Ray, or anyone else. I’m in.”

  Jeff grasped Buck’s outstretched hand, and they shook on it.

  36

  SUNDAY, APRIL 27, 2003 ST. CHARLES, MISSOURI RUTH PERKINS’S HOME

  “We believe that the Growing in Christ Campaign is the next logical step for The Road to Calvary, providing us with added space and amenities for the entire family,” Ray said, smiling into the camera, motioning to the blueprint displayed on a tripod. “In
addition to the new church, the original space will house Sunday school classrooms, a Christian bookstore and music center, and a coffee shop and bakery—a place where Christians can come together with other members of this faith community.”

  Ruth scooted to the edge of her chair, peering intently at the blueprints of the proposed facility. “My, this is quite exciting,” she said aloud. “And to think Emma pooh-poohed the Reverend Ray’s good works.”

  “But we can’t begin this large undertaking without the support of our wonderful viewers and church community,” Susannah Baker purred. “We’ve set ambitious goals, but we have faith that, with your help, we can reach them.”

  The camera pulled back, revealing Ray in a sharp gray suit and Susannah wearing a red sheath standing center stage. “We recognize that two and a half million dollars is no small amount of money, and a year is a relatively brief period to raise that amount. Visit our website, where you can view the detailed building plans, get answers to your questions, see ways you can personalize your donation, and prayerfully consider how much your gift can be to realize this dream on your continuing journey of faith.”

  “Or you can start the ball rolling today by calling 1-800-HE-SAVES. So why don’t you do that—help us kick off the Growing in Christ Campaign by donating right now?” Susannah added smiling. “1-800-HE-SAVES, and remember that He died to save us from our sins.”

  Susannah handed the microphone to Ray who began, “In Christ’s name we pray . . .”

  Ruth was jotting down figures on another piece of paper. My house is paid for. Orville’s life insurance policy, investments, and my retirement from teaching give me well over $750,000. She paused, feeling rather guilty. I should probably leave something to Emma, but I’m not sure she’d appreciate it.