A Little Less than Famous

by Sara E. Santana

  "A plan?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. "A plan? There's not a plan that is going to work."

  "Okay, Negative Nancy," Amanda shot back.

  I sighed. "A plan to do what? And did you just call me Negative Nancy?”

  "Yeah, I did, and honestly, I don’t know," Amanda admitted, sinking into my bed. "What about Corinna? Can you call her?"

  I hesitated. "I don't know. Maybe. She's still waiting for an answer on the whole acting/modeling thing and I don't really have an answer so I'm a little afraid to call her."

  "Okay, well that's out..."

  "And we are definitely talking about the acting thing once we figure out the Jake thing," Olivia scolded, smiling. "But baby steps, I get it."

  "Wait, I've got it," Amanda squealed. "Oh my god, I am such an idiot. I'm still having trouble separating Jake Kennedy, your ex, and Jake Kennedy, Crime Scene actor." She hopped off my bed and headed over to my computer.

  "What are you talking about?" I turned to Olivia. "What is she talking about?" Olivia shrugged. "Amanda?"

  "Can you shut up for a moment?" She answered, typing on my computer. "A-ha! Found it!" She waved us over, pointing to something on the screen.

  I leaned over, and read. It was a Facebook event, for an autograph session in Santa Monica for Crime Scene. It was all the younger actors: Jake, Andrea, Frankie and all the others. It was a week away. It already had an insane amount of yes R.S.V.P.s.

  "You have got to be kidding me?" I said. "There are like going to be, like, a million girls there. I probably won't even get anywhere near him."

  "Okay, we'll make sure you get close, for one thing," Amanda said. "And its you. You're not all those other girls. You're McKinley Evans. Honestly, I’m surprised you weren’t included.”

  “I was just a guest star,” I said, automatically.

  "You can totally do this," Olivia said. "I think it would be romantic to show up like that, to find him."

  I looked back and forth between them. "Are you serious right now? Are you both really telling me to do this?"

  Amanda sighed. "I know. It's silly and corny and I don't even know how the chances are. All I know is that my best friend is finally in love and can admit it and we need to make sure that he knows it." She and I stared at each other for some long moments.

  "Oh my, this is so exciting," Olivia burst in, clapping her hands together. I looked over at her, and I couldn't help it. I laughed.

  Later, as I was dropping her off at the airport, I sat back and really thought about my weekend. I had met my grandmother who ended up being a pretty cool person. I still wasn't sure but I was looking forward to that moment when I would be. I learned about my dad, my sisters, my entire family. And I had finally learned that emotions, emotions were not a bad thing. They were scary as hell but that's part of what made them what they were. And I was scared. I was scared of the relationship I could possibly be starting with my grandmother. I was scared of my mother's intentions and I was scared of talking to my biological father. I was scared of finding Jake and telling him how I felt. But I had never felt any better in my entire life.

  * * * * * *

  "I can't do this."

  Amanda shook her head, not answering me. She was concentrating on parallel parking. It had been nearly impossible to find a parking spot; it was crowded and I knew exactly why and it was about 6'4 in height and had impossible blue eyes.

  "I'm serious. I can't do this. I'm going to throw up."

  "You are not throwing up in my car, McKinley," Amanda said, firmly, putting the car in park and grabbing her purse from the backseat. "You've had a week to change your mind...and the entire hour drive over here. It's too late now. We're doing this." She opened the door, slid out and shut the door behind her. I sat in the car, staring at the dashboard. "Get your ass out of the car."

  "Fine, fine," I said, getting out of the car. "I'm out." I caught my reflection in the window. "Are you sure this is okay?" I looked down at my outfit. I had put on a black off-the-shoulder blouse that did not leave anything to the imagination, and tight gray pants with high-heeled boots that hit just below the knee. "I mean, it's not too much?"

  Amanda looked surprised and I didn't blame her. I never acted like this ever. "You look awesome, McKinley, and sexy as hell."

  I looked back at my reflection. "You're right. You're totally right. I look awesome. Let's do this."

  I followed her down the sidewalk, trying to concentrate on the sounds of my boots hitting the pavement and trying not to think too hard about what I was about to do. I was nervous as hell and I wasn't sure what was going to happen. There was no backing out now. I had told myself I was going to do and I wasn't going to let myself down. We made our way down the street, walking briskly all the way to the Third Street Promenade. As soon as we turned the corner, I felt my heart drop. "I told you! Damn it, Amanda, look at all those girls!"

  "Okay there are totally guys too," Amanda pointed out. "Yeah, there are totally guys in this line. Let's get in line." She found the end and we walked over.

  "Okay, but I'm pretty sure those guys are here for Andrea Tremaine," I hissed at her.

  "Maybe not all of them," she shrugged. She looked so calm and I wanted to hit her in the face, before I remembered that I was the one here with a purpose and not her. I was the one about to bare myself to a boy, not her. She already had her man; she was already comfortable and happy.

  I took a deep breath. "I guess you're right about that." I craned my neck to see if I could even tell the direction of the line. "Oh, we are so not making it to the front of the line. We should probably just go."

  "McKinley Evans, you are staying," Amanda said, tensely. "Stop trying to make excuses to leave."

  "I'm not," I protested. She shot a look my way. "Okay, maybe I am." I sighed, looking around. "You know, it’s kind of funny."

  "What's funny?" she asked.

  "Well, I met Jake because of a long line. And now I'm in a long line again, to tell him that I love him. It's just kind of funny, though that line for Space Mountain seems a lot shorter now." I was babbling. I never babbled and now I couldn’t seem to stop.

  "We'll get to the front, McKinley, I promise," Amanda said, determinedly but I could see that she looked a little nervous at just how long the line was.

  "Excuse me, are you McKinley Evans?"

  I turned around and saw a girl of about fourteen, looking up at me nervously. She seemed to have four or five friends behind her, urging her to go forward. "Oh, um, yeah I am."

  Her eyes grew wide. "Oh my god, I totally thought so but Jill said it wasn't you because, like, why would McKinley Evans be in line to meet people that she worked with, I guess, so they dared me to come and ask you and I was like, sure fine, whatever, but you have to come with me and oh my god, it’s you!"

  I looked over at Amanda, who was trying really hard to not laugh. Her hand was over her mouth, barely concealing a smile. I turned back to the girl. "Yeah, it's me." I stuck my hand out to shake hers. "What was your name?"

  "Lori. Lori McClain," she said, smiling wide. "Can I have an autograph?" She held out the most recent season of Crime Scene, the one I had guest starred on, for me to sign. I stared at it for a long moment and then smiled at her.

  "Sure, of course." I took the box set and the sharpie from her and scrawled my name out real quick. Next thing I knew, there were DVD box sets, and posters, and magazines being shoved in my face and I was being bombarded for autographs. One guy even found an ad for Lush in a magazine he had been reading and had me sign it. Amanda was cracking up behind me, grabbing my arm to guide me as the line started to move. I smiled for people, signed their stuff, and took pictures. Then I heard a very familiar voice.

  "McKinley, what are you doing here?"

  I held my smile in place as I took another picture with a sweaty and pimply teen boy who probably had no idea who I was but was intrigued by the small crowd that had gathered around me. I turned away from him and faced Adrienne. "Adrienne, hi."


  She smiled, thinly, looking at all the people gathered around me. "If this doesn't give you a reason to say yes to me, I don't know what will. I know you've been avoiding me." I opened my mouth to answer but she kept talking. "I heard there was a bit of a commotion back here so I had to come see what it was about. I didn't really expect to see you here. What are you doing here exactly?"

  "I, um, came to see Jake," I said, quietly, aware that I had an audience in the form of a bunch of teenage girls. One even had a "Team Charlotte" shirt. I didn't even know those had existed. I noticed that we had actually made a lot of progress in the line. I could actually see Jake and Andrea and I hoped they were not in listening distance.

  Adrienne's eyes grew wide. "That is a really bad idea, McKinley. I think you should leave."

  I looked at her, surprised. "Wait, what? Why?"

  Her face softened for a moment. "McKinley, I love you, you know that. I adore you. You seriously need to give me an answer, girl, because I would love to help you with what could be a good career. I care, okay? This is why I'm telling you that you should really leave."

  "Okay, that is some serious bullshit," Amanda said, her arms folded across her chest, looking down at Adrienne, as if she were something very unpleasant that she had stepped in.

  I shook my head. "Amanda, it's fine. I can handle this." I addressed Adrienne. "No, no way. I came all the way over here and I've been waiting and I need to see him."

  She stared at me for a long moment and shook her head. "I hate doing this. I do, really." She turned on her heel and walked up to the front of the line, which was being manned by a big beefy white guy who looked like he could knock anyone out with one punch. She whispered a few words in his ear and then disappeared. I stared after her, feeling let down. What the hell was going on?

  I didn't need to ask. The beefy security guard turned to us and held his hands up. "Sorry, guys, this is the cutoff. The actors need to leave now. We're sorry you waited so long but time is up. Time to start clearing out."

  "She did not!" Amanda said, aghast.

  "She did," I confirmed, horrified. "I can't believe she did this. I am so close."

  "What a bitch."

  "That's it. Amanda, that's it. What am I supposed to do?"

  "Go," Amanda said. I looked at her, curiously. "Go! Go now! Run, push people, I don't know, McKinley! Just go!" She shoved me away from her, toward the table where the actors were starting to get up.

  I looked around, trying to figure out to get past everyone. I saw a women's bathroom, which I knew had two entrances, one of them on the other side of the table. I wondered how no body had noticed it. I made my way towards it, and ran through it to the other side. I looked around, hoping they hadn't walked away yet. I saw Adrienne walking away, almost hidden by a crowd of people. Jake had to be over there. I started heading over there, determined, my eye on the prize. I didn't pay attention to anything else, just stared at Adrienne as I made my way over to her.

  I was so focused that I didn't notice him until I went pummeling into him. I nearly fell over, until I felt a large hand grab my arm to keep me steady. I steadied myself and looked up, and up, into the eyes of Jake Kennedy, himself.

  "McKinley?" He looked confused. "What are you doing here?"

  I stared at him, amazed at how different it felt to be around now that I knew I was in love with him. I tried to open my mouth but no words came out, just a weird squeaking noise. I blushed, maybe one of the first times I had ever blushed. "Um, I'm here with Amanda," I said. Words! I could speak! "We were shopping, you know." How was it possible that I sounded so breezy? Tell him, McKinley, tell him.

  "Shopping? All the way in Santa Monica?" he asked. The security guard that was standing next to him was trying to lead him away but he waved him off.

  I paused, and I could feel the breeziness fade away. This was it. This is when I told him. My entire body wanted to launch itself at him, glue itself to him, so that we would never be apart but I knew I had to say it first, I had to tell him. "Jake, I..."

  "Hey baby, what's going on?" Andrea had come up, looking up at Jake curiously. Her hand had gone for his and suddenly, I realized what she had called him. Baby. I stared at them; feeling like my worst fear had come true. They were standing so close together, their hands linked, and I knew. I just knew. It was too late.

  "Just talking to McKinley," he said, not taking his eyes off of me.

  Andrea looked over at me and I immediately saw the triumphant look in her eyes. "Oh, hi, McKinley. What are you doing?"

  "Shopping," I said, breezily. "Amanda's favorite store is down here so we decided to come down for some shopping, maybe grab some lunch. It's so crazy that you guys are here too!"

  "Yeah, what a weird coincidence," Andrea said, looking as if she had just been told that it was her birthday and Christmas in one day.

  "I know!" I said, laughing. Just keep laughing, McKinley, just keep laughing.

  "So what have you been up to, girl?" Andrea said. I had to get out of here. Andrea was keeping me here; she was trying to shove her victory in my face. "I saw your Lush pictures and you looked adorable."

  "Thank you," I said, strained.

  "McKinley..." Jake started to say.

  "I should get going," I said, trying to smile and trying so desperately not to look at their linked hands. "It was awesome seeing you guys."

  "McKinley, wait."

  "Bye guys!" I said, cheerfully. I turned around and started to walk away, as casually as I could, toward Amanda. I grabbed her arm and started pulling her towards the car. I could feel the tears coming and I wasn't going to let them happen, not while they could still see me. "Let's go. Now. Please. I just want to go home. Now."

  * * * * * *

  Two weeks had passed since I had gone down to Santa Monica, two weeks since I had attempted to tell Jake how I felt, two weeks since I had seen Jake holding hands with Andrea Tremaine. Time had passed and I had accepted what I had seen. I had shown up way too late. I had figured things out too late. Jake was with Andrea. Things were as they should be. But that didn't stop everyone from harassing me all the time. They even staged an intervention.

  I came home from class and let myself into the diner. I flicked on the lights and was surprised to see that there were people sitting in the diner: Luke, Amanda, Diane and Robert, Iris, Dave, Oliver and Cassandra, Frank, Chris, Mitch and Crystal.

  "Um, what's going on? My birthday already passed..."I said, raising my eyebrow at them.

  "McKinley, we just wanted to talk to you. About Jake. About everything," Luke said.

  "You've been absolutely miserable," Iris cut in. "You don't talk to anyone, you don't go anywhere but class. You sit up in your room all day."

  "We're worried, McKinley," Amanda said. "I know things with Jake didn't go exactly go as planned. But it had to have been a fluke. There's no way that Jake was actually with Andrea. He has pretended to date her before and…and he loves you."

  "You need to call him, go to his house, stake out places he goes to," Cassandra insisted. "You didn't tell him and he needs to know."

  I took a deep breath, trying to control my anger. "I'm fine, I really am. I've moved on. Jake is with Andrea now and I'm fine with that. I just want him to be happy."

  Crystal shook her head. "Come on, don't be stupid. You know he is only with Andrea because he thinks you don't love him. You know it was all for show."

  "Please, McKinley, don't give up," Amanda begged. "I'll do whatever I can to help. I'll go to jail for stalking Jake Kennedy for you, if that's what it takes. I just want you to be happy."

  "Guys, I know," I said. I reached into my purse and brought out the latest issue of StarStruck magazine. The cover was a picture of Jake and Andrea, exiting a restaurant in Palos Verdes, holding hands and smiling. The headline screamed Jake Kennedy and Andrea Tremaine: Back Together? The smaller headlines below read: How the two young hot stars were caught in public and what happened to McKinley Evans?

  "You found it," Amanda s
aid, wincing.

  "Yeah, I found it," I answered, feeling tired. "I know you thought hiding it with the fry pan liners was a good idea but I found it. And I know. And I told you, I'm fine." I felt a buzz in my pocket and I wondered who it could possible be. The only people in my life at the moment were the ones sitting in front of me.

  "I just don't think you should give up, honey," Iris said, sadly.

  I felt another buzz in my pocket and felt annoyed. I yanked my phone out and stared at it. The email icon was blinking and I felt frustrated.

  "Can you maybe not answer your phone while we're trying to have a serious conversation with you?" Luke asked, his voice even.

  "Yeah, fine, whatever. Let me just clear this email," I said, squinting at the screen. I felt a swoop in my chest as I saw who the sender was. "Oh my god. Oh my god." I sank into the nearest chair to me, my legs giving out beneath me.