I don’t think he’s a bad person, but I was unintentionally bringing out the worst in him and I couldn’t understand why. I felt he resented me. I suggested couples counselling, because I was desperate to try to make things work; I didn’t want another failed relationship under my belt, I wanted to settle down. He wasn’t interested. I suggested we both save to travel for a year, and we decided that would be ‘make or break’ time. He opened an account for us and we began to save.
One day when he was drunk he admitted that he was jealous of me, which explained the resentment I felt from him. It seemed like he hated me most of the time. He said he was jealous of my home, my family and my friends. He didn’t have a good relationship with his family and they weren’t close like mine, but he could have bought a house if he’d wanted to, and he seemed to have lots of friends, although they were more acquaintances that he’d known from school. The first Christmas he spent with me and my family, my mum bought him a stocking and filled it with goodies like she still does for us ‘kids’. He said it was the first stocking he’d ever had, that he was overwhelmed, and that he felt more welcome visiting my mum and dad than he did with his own parents.
When it got to the stage that I was staying away from home just to get away from the arguing, I knew I had to end it. He shouted all kinds of abuse at me, so I walked out again, and didn’t return for a couple of hours. By the time I got back, he had left and taken his things. If we hadn’t argued so much, I would seriously have considered finishing escorting and settling down with him; the more I was falling for him, the more difficult I found my work. To be cuddling on the sofa and then have to get up and get ready to see another man was awful! I really didn’t want to go on my dates, but I never cancelled them because I didn’t want to let the client down and I had to earn a living.
Of course when the arguments were really bad, work would be a welcome relief as I could focus on someone else, someone who would make me feel appreciated, and I could forget how unhappy I was in my relationship. At times like those, I knew I couldn’t stop escorting, because the people I saw on my work ‘dates’ made me feel happy and good about myself. I know Alex found it very difficult when I was travelling abroad and staying in exotic hotels; he must have wished he could have afforded to take me to places like that, and I wished that too. I don’t think he believed I would rather have been with him in all those places – I always called and kept in touch with him whenever I could when I was away, and I missed him like crazy.
Once he moved out, we saw each other a couple of times. When dropping me back at mine one evening, he paused at the door and turned back to me and said, ‘I don’t suppose you fancy a shag, do you?’ Of course I did! Once he moved out, the tension between us eased and we could have possibly worked things out if he’d persevered, but then I asked him for the key back and he assumed I didn’t want to see him anymore. That wasn’t the case – I just wasn’t sure what would happen with the two of us. When I was liaising with him about splitting the money we had saved, I found out he had been ripping me off for about six months, and I never got the full amount I’d saved back. I was really disappointed in him because I trusted him implicitly. I didn’t care about the money
– what hurt the most was the fact that it was premeditated and the mutual trust and respect that I thought was there wasn’t.
When I finished with Alex, I realised this was a turning point in my life. Like a lot of women, I liked being part of a couple, but I found I wasn’t worried about being on my own again. My confidence had grown and I felt strong as a person. I was literally buzzing from excitement from being single and having no stress in my life. Once again, my focus was back on my work. My jobs have thrown up some real gems over the years
– not only do I get to go on some amazing dates for work, I get paid for it and there’s minimal stress!
‘Hello stranger, how are you doing? Think it’s about time we met up, babes…’ This was the text message I received from Simon , a very successful businessman , who works extremely hard. He goes through phases – I’ll see him a few times, and then I won’t hear anything for ages. We first met when I had just started escorting, and he’s one of the few guys that I really fancied, physically and mentally. He’d never seen an escort before and with me being a novice, it meant we were both sussing things out. I actually fancied him so much that I agreed to go out on a non -paid date with him, but this never came to fruition . He also wanted to take me to the Maldives, but he didn’t want to pay me anything for the trip and I couldn’t afford to take time off as I was in debt, so that was that.
Then I didn’t hear from him for about five years. When he contacted me again , he’d been married and divorced, had a spell in rehab and his mum had just died. His divorce cost him thousands and I told him it would have been cheaper for him to see me during that time than to have got married! He seemed surprised that I’d remembered him. Obviously I don’t remember everyone I see, but I often recognise a face or a name if I see them again , and I remembered him because I had fancied him. He had a Porsche and I remember thinking ‘why can’t I have a boyfriend like him ?’ I remembered the tattoo on his back, and I even remembered his house and bedroom.
He has aged considerably since I first saw him, but he is still attractive, with a cheeky, boyish face. He’s now in his late thirties, greying, overweight and often looks flushed and sweaty (I suspect he has high blood pressure), but there’s definitely something sexy about him. He’s single, but as he works long hours he never gets the opportunity to meet ladies to date.
I’ve seen him about six times in total. This time I hadn’t heard from him for over six months, after he cancelled on me at the last minute but paid me for the inconvenience. Often he wants to see me at short notice, when the stress at work gets too much. The text came through, and fortunately I was free that evening. We normally did an overnight, but this time we arranged to meet for a dinner date as I wanted to get home to my own bed because I don’t sleep well when I’m with him. We usually stay at his house on the outskirts of Leicester, so we made plans to meet at 6.45p.m. at his local Indian , so that he could stay late at work.
I arrived early and was expecting him to be a bit late. I assumed he’d arrive in his Bentley, but he called and said he was just dropping off one of his business partners and that he’d be arriving in his gigantic 4x4. When he arrived, it felt like some illicit meeting of two married people, both arriving separately and meeting in the car park. Wherever we go in his village, people always want to talk to him. It’s clear he is very popular and well liked, and he always introduces me to people. I feel like I’m his new girlfriend, meeting all the locals.
As soon as we entered the restaurant, the owner’s son greeted us and spent quite a while chatting at our table, and then the owner came over, but eventually we were left to choose our meal. Simon was downing the wine like there was no tomorrow, so I reminded him about his car and he said he’d jump in mine and leave his. In the six months since our last date, he’d joined a dating site and met a few strange ladies. The first time he slept with one of them, she complained that he didn’t cuddle her in the night, and then she got a bit obsessive and scared him off. So, he’s given up on online dating and is back to booking me, which is great!
Really, he can’t get his head around the whole escort thing – I can’t win with him. He’s extremely insecure, and knowing that he’s paying for companionship knocks his confidence; he thinks I’m just putting on an act for him, because his self-esteem is so low. I constantly try to make him feel good about himself with genuine compliments – I tell him I enjoy his company and feel very relaxed with him, and that I’m attracted to him, but then I know he’s thinking, ‘well, why should I have to pay?’ I almost think he would prefer it if I was some random woman , only interested in him for his money.
He asks why he can’t have a girlfriend like me, but then says he wouldn’t want to go out with an escort because he couldn’t bear the thought of another man ‘stic
king his thingy into his woman’ – which is understandable. He thinks I detach from the experience when I have sex with him, and I do, but it’s subconscious. Although I find him attractive, I wouldn’t want someone like him in my private life because he’s selfish in the bedroom. He thinks that because he’s paying, he can treat me like a prostitute, and that’s why I’m not attached to him in any way – he’s not trying to please me. I’m in the role of pleasing him. He’s never been interested in trying to make me orgasm or giving me pleasure before he takes it for himself. I put up with it because I do genuinely like him, and his ego is very fragile. Maybe he treats me like a prostitute because it’s the only way he can get his head around paying for companionship.
He mentioned that he wanted to take me to Portugal. He’s been on and on about taking me away for over a year now, so I’ve learnt not to take these comments seriously. He asked over dinner, ‘So, how much for me to take you to Portugal for a week?’ but then he added, ‘For me?’ It annoys the hell out of me when rich people want discounts. Not particularly wealthy people rarely ask ; if he wasn’t well -off, I’d quote him considerably less than my usual £5,000. But as he’s loaded and I’m not, I think, why should I give him a discount? I don’t even think of him as a regular, seeing him once or twice a year; he shouldn’t begrudge paying me. I feel I have to explain my reasoning when I tell him I won’t be able to offer a discount – I shouldn’t have to, but I know he won’t get round to taking me away anyway, so it all seems a bit pointless.
The food was delicious, but as he was paying the bill, he pulled a small packet out of his shirt pocket. It was liquid Viagra. My heart sank. I told him it was dangerous for him to be taking it if it wasn’t prescribed: many guys don’t realise you need to be extremely careful and that it can be very dangerous if you have high blood pressure or heart problems. Some people have a weak heart and don’t even know. It had left a blue patch, as it had leaked onto his shirt pocket. He started lapping it up from his fingers. Because I’m so comfortable with him, I can be my normal cheeky self, so I told him he had another thing coming if he thought we were going to shag for three hours! ‘Let me have it!’ I snapped. He passed it over and I rolled my eyes, wrapped it in a napkin and left it on our table as we left. He then said he had a raging hard on .
As we walked out, he told me to follow him. It was clear he was planning to drive, even though he’d had a bottle and a half of wine and an Irish coffee. I told him if he got into his car, I would go home. He protested that he couldn’t leave it overnight because he needed it, but I wouldn’t budge. Thankfully, he saw sense and got in my car. I wondered how often he drove while drunk – he claimed he never did, but I suspect it was quite often .
When we got back to his, we sat in his boys’ lounge. There’s a bar, a huge TV and comfy leather recliners, all with drinks holders – I can just imagine a bunch of lads watching a fight or football game there. We watched TV for about an hour before he said he was going to shower.
After a relatively short session , which ended up in him having to bring himself off while I sucked on his balls, he then said he was tired. I asked if he wanted me to leave, and he apologised and said yes. I told him it suited me too, as it meant I wouldn’t get back too late, so I ended up leaving 40 minutes early.
CHAPTER 13:
The Boyfriend Experience
Recently I had the best date I’ve ever had with a guy. Sexually, it was everything I craved, and in fact I was concerned that I might fall for him, if I saw him regularly. I was to meet him for an extended overnight date, with a view to us travelling away together for a few days. The day before, he said he liked light coloured lingerie and stockings. I had my reservations because he’d made these requests, but he hadn’t said ‘I want you to wear this and this’, he’d said it was what he liked, so I didn’t expect he’d be the controlling type.
There’s a misconception that all escorts must be real sex experts and I think many men are intimidated. I’m oldfashioned, and I love long, sensual foreplay, with lots of kissing and caressing and massage before moving on to sex. I’d like to explore tantric sex with my next partner, as I think I have lots more to learn about sex and reaching mutual fulfilment.
I arrived to meet my date and my first thought was that he was very attractive. He was in his forties and I could see through his T-shirt that he had a toned, trim body. He’d bought me flowers and Swiss chocolates, and had put a card in the envelope with my fee. It was just before Christmas, and he even gave me a mince pie which his mum had made, in a little bag that he’d managed to squash. It was so sweet! He wasn’t full-on, he was relaxed and we spent a good hour just chatting.
We went out to a pub I had recommended. Over dinner, he was a great companion, interesting and attentive. Back at the room, I lit candles and we put on some music. We kissed for ages – he was a lovely kisser. He didn’t just try to get my clothes off, and he wasn’t too eager. Eventually he undid my dress and I let it slip to the floor. I’d worn hold-ups with light-coloured lingerie, as he’d requested, and from the look in his eyes this met with his approval. Usually my lingerie comes off so quickly on dates that I wonder why I bother, but we caressed and kissed, savouring each stage of intimacy as we slowly unwrapped each other like presents. It felt as though I was with my lover – this was like a BFE (now there’s a new one – a Boyfriend Experience!). And he was paying me. It was heaven! I started to realise how guys must feel when I offer them this kind of intimacy. It was so easy to feel something for this guy, because of his tenderness and the connection I felt we had, and for the first time I was confused. He made it all seem so natural – maybe I should suggest he becomes a male escort!
When we were both naked, he kissed me and stroked me so wonderfully gently that it was highly erotic. I was so turned on and he hadn’t even begun exploring the obvious bits. I lay back and savoured every moment – I had barely touched him, but it was clear that he wanted to enjoy me first, so I let him, knowing he would reap the benefits after. Many guys go straight for the breasts and vagina/clitoris. It’s so obvious. I actually like foreplay to include a lot of caressing and kissing of other areas of the body first, and I think that’s why often I don’t orgasm with work. If someone goes straight for my clitoris, I usually can’t get turned on enough to have an orgasm. If only more men realised this!
His oral sex was perfect, soft with a featherlike touch, and I was frustrated to find that I couldn’t orgasm, even though I was incredibly turned on and extremely relaxed. This may have had something to do with the time – it was getting late (for me), and I was very tired. Most escorts are nocturnal ladies of the night, but I’m one of the rare few who love daytimes, especially early mornings. After an early night at home, I love getting up at around 6a.m. in the summer when it’s bright.
Much as I was enjoying myself, I was fading rapidly. I reached down to finish the job myself with my fingers, which didn’t take long because he had put in all the groundwork. He then lay on his back and I stroked and kissed him, down his body and inner thighs, taking my time before licking his balls and moving my tongue up the shaft of his penis, and then I took him in my mouth. He savoured this before suggesting I get a condom. Then he turned me onto my back and slowly entered me. Instead of pumping away like a sex-crazed loon, he took his time with deep, precise, slow thrusts. It felt amazing! For the first time ever I wished we’d skipped dinner but how was I to know he wouldn’t be a ‘typical’ client? He built himself up to climax and collapsed on top of me.
Unfortunately, I ended up not being able to make the dates for his trip so he took someone else. Part of me hoped he didn’t have a good time and would choose to take me next time! Hopefully we’ll meet again.
I look forward to seeing my elderly regular, John, of whom I’m extremely fond. He finds it difficult to sneak away as he still works full time and has no reason to travel. I only see him two or three times a year, when his wife goes away for long weekends with her friends. I’m pretty sure he doesn’
t see anyone else, and I know he would see me more often if he could. He’s very respectful, and not demanding in the bedroom, which is appreciated. It’s mostly about companionship, even more so with him than my usual dates.
We always have fun, and I’m quite cheeky with him, which I know he enjoys. We go back and forth with banter, and even when I’m cheeky, he laughs and tells me I’m lovely and beautiful. He’ll try to stroke my leg in public, and I’ll playfully push him off and tell him to behave. He loves it! As with most of my clients I don’t like to be seen holding hands with him (only real couples or those in some sort of intimate relationship hold hands), and I feel self-conscious when he tries to show affection in public, but that’s not because it’s him, I feel that way with all the clients I see. We talk about all sorts, and age has never been a barrier as far as the conversation side of things; I think it keeps him young, having someone like me to have fun with.
Much to my surprise, he once asked if I could set him up on a date with a different escort! I got quite shirty with him and asked who he thought I was, his bloody secretary? We had a laugh about it and he ended up booking me instead. I think he respects the fact that I’m not different with him because he has money – I treat everyone the same, money or not. I’m sure there are escorts that do treat wealthy people differently, and other women that do so, too. But he doesn’t fit the ‘rich mould’, anyway – although he’s ridiculously loaded, he’s not emotionally needy or tight, like many of the rich guys I meet. John doesn’t spend money on himself; he even drives an old blue work van. He’s extremely generous, though, and loves to shower me with expensive gifts: beautiful clothes, shoes, bags and jewellery. He says it makes him happy and I genuinely believe it does. Who am I to deprive an old man of happiness?
The Girlfriend Experience Page 16