by Diana Palmer
So it didn’t matter what happened to her. The hiking trail led right through one of the biggest orchards in the valley, and the late-blooming fruit trees were putting out pollen by the bucketload.
It was a cowardly thing to do. But Niki didn’t care anymore. She’d lost Blair. Life had nothing left for her. She only wanted it over. She’d left her rescue inhaler at home. She felt a moment’s panic when she thought how it felt when she had an attack. She could only get a little air in and no air out. It was like suffocating. But hopefully it would be quick. And they were far enough out that time would be in her favor. It was unlikely that they’d be able to get a rescue team out here before her life drained away. Her asthma was severe. An attack without her rescue inhaler could quickly be fatal.
It didn’t even matter. She moved ahead like a sleepwalker with her fanny pack around her waist, her feet in expensive boots that peeked out from under her jeans. She had on a tank top and no sweater, which was bad because it was a cool morning. That didn’t matter, either. She heard Blair’s voice telling her that it was only lust, that he didn’t care, that he and Janet were getting back together. He must have meant it, because that tabloid photo of the two of them was very informative. Janet had been pressed close to Blair’s chest, looking up at him with pure worship. Blair had his arm around her, smiling down at her, the way he’d smiled at her in the hotel in Cancun when Niki had come upon them unexpectedly.
At least Janet had a future worth looking toward. Maybe she’d make Blair happy, at least.
“Earth to Niki, are you there?” Dan teased.
She snapped out of her reveries and smiled. “I’m here.”
“Great! Let’s go!”
* * *
IT IRRITATED BLAIR that Janet had shown up in Frankfurt. It irritated him more that she had a room right next to his suite.
“I’m making a film here, darling. Isn’t it nice that we’re here at the same time?” she teased.
“I’ve got meetings most of the day and half the night,” he said quietly. “No time to party. Sorry.”
“Oh, that’s all right. Maybe I’ll see you at breakfast,” she added, her eyes bright with hope.
“Maybe.”
He walked away, sick at heart. It should have been Niki here with him, right here, in the hotel, in his room, in his bed, in his arms. He almost groaned aloud. He missed her more than he’d dreamed he ever could.
Now he had Janet stalking him the way Elise had done, trying to tempt him into indiscretion.
She couldn’t know that it would never work. He felt nothing for her. In fact, he felt nothing for any woman except Niki, especially after the taste of her he’d had that haunted his dreams, made him hungry, tortured him in the wee hours of the morning.
He’d been reckless enough to send her a text message, asking how she was. There had been no reply. Well, there had been one. An emoji with the mouth pulled to one side. Expressive. A visual “who cares?”
It disturbed him enough to phone Todd, on the excuse of business, from his hotel room.
“How’s that equipment sale to Mexico coming along?” he asked on his way down the street from yet another meeting with a European distributor.
“Slowly,” Todd chuckled, “like any business we do south of the border. They’re a lot more cautious than they used to be.”
“Mexico has had her problems with outside interests, and it goes back a long, long way.”
“Yes.” He hesitated. “How are you and Janet doing? I heard she was making a commercial in Frankfurt.”
There was a long pause. “She’s fine, I suppose. I’ve been too busy to see much of her.” He hesitated. “How’s Niki?”
“Quiet.”
He frowned. “That’s not like her.”
“I know.” Todd’s voice was laced with concern. “She’d just come from her physical. She didn’t say there was anything wrong, and I can’t intimidate Doctor Fred enough to make him talk to me. Maybe some female problem she didn’t want to discuss with her dad,” he chuckled. But he was worried. Even the humor didn’t hide that.
“It’s spring,” Blair pointed out. “She always has trouble with her lungs in the spring.”
“I know. Just like her mother,” he added involuntarily.
“You never talk about Martha,” Blair replied quietly.
“Hurts too much,” the older man confided. “I went off the deep end when I lost her. It was the last thing on earth I expected. She was so much younger than I was. I always thought I’d be the one to go first.”
“Younger?”
Todd took a deep breath. “Eighteen years younger,” he said. “I had all these worries about the age difference, what people would think, what if I ended up in a nursing home while she was still young enough to date...that sort of thing.”
Blair’s heart was pounding. “But you married her anyway.”
“Against my better judgment. Of the two things in my whole damned life I got right, Martha was one of them. Niki’s the other. We only had eight years, but they were the best, most beautiful years of my life. I’d give anything, anything, to have her back!”
“What happened?”
Todd swallowed. “Lung cancer. She was frail, like Niki. Pollen bothered her, and she had asthma, too. I spent many a night in emergency rooms with her when the attacks got too bad. She hated that,” he laughed softly. “She felt like she was a burden. I told her that she was the sweetest burden any man ever had, and why couldn’t she consider it a date? We were touring emergency rooms and getting familiar with new equipment and meeting people. That always made her laugh.”
Blair felt the other man’s pain to his bones. Niki was fragile like that. He thought about losing her, and his whole body clenched. He could only imagine what it had been like for his friend.
“I went crazy when she died,” Todd recalled. “Stayed drunk for two weeks and tried to get myself killed any way I could. But Edna had just come to work for me, and she reminded me that Niki only had one parent, and why wasn’t I thinking about her instead of myself. So I came to my senses.”
“You never remarried.”
“No,” Todd said softly. “And I never will. I had the most wonderful marriage any man ever dreamed of, lived with the sweetest, kindest woman on earth for eight beautiful years. Why the hell would I want to trade that memory for some woman who wants minks and a Cadillac?”
Blair took a long breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you then.”
“It was a long time ago.”
Blair was thinking. Quiet. “Is Niki there?” he asked, because it was very early on a Saturday morning. Perhaps they could talk and make peace.
“No,” came the reply, and there was concern in it. “She went hiking.”
“Hiking?” Blair asked, frowning. “Isn’t that tricky, when the pollen count is so high?”
“Our Mr. Brady thinks it will be good for her not to pamper herself,” Todd said coolly. “She took plenty of water along.”
“And her rescue inhaler?”
“I’m sure she did,” Todd replied. “She knows better than to leave home without it this time of year.”
Blair hesitated. “I might come down for a few days next week. If it’s all right.”
“It’s all right with me,” Todd said. “On the other hand, you might want to make sure it’s okay with Niki. She’s been rather vocal about you lately, and not in a good way.”
He grimaced. “I’ve made some mistakes with her. Some bad ones.”
“You might want to patch them up before she ends up married to the California health nut,” Todd said curtly. “She spends too much time with him, and he has an influence on her that I don’t like. Asthma isn’t just in the mind. A man like that could push her over the edge. She had an attack once that almost killed her whe
n she couldn’t get to her inhaler, and she was even at home at the time. Tex, God bless him, was quick on his feet or we’d have lost her. Got her the inhaler, had the ambulance there in a heartbeat.”
“He’s fond of her,” Blair said, and couldn’t manage to keep the edge out of his voice.
“He’s crazy about her,” her father corrected. “But Niki likes him the way she likes most men. He’s just a friend.”
That was a relief. But the California man worried him. A lot. “She doesn’t need some insensitive nut taking her places she shouldn’t be going in the first place. Hiking, for God’s sake!” he burst out.
“Well, I can’t stop it,” Todd replied heavily. “Believe me, I tried. He’s convinced her that she’s just pampering herself, that she’s not frail, that exercise and fresh air will turn her into an Amazon.”
“Not likely.” Blair’s tone was ice-cold.
“You and I know that. Niki doesn’t. She’s been different since we came home from Mexico,” he added quietly. “She’s grown old in front of my eyes. I miss the daughter who was sparkling like a jewel, always smiling no matter how bad things got.”
Blair closed his eyes and shuddered mentally, because he knew why Niki was that way. He knew who’d turned her old overnight.
“It might do you good to come down here for a while,” Todd added. “Just, uh, don’t bring Janet with you, okay?”
“I’d like to leave her in Frankfurt forever,” the other man said shortly. “I know how deer feel in hunting season.”
“She really has the hots for you.”
“She has the hots for my money,” Blair said. “That’s the only thing she wants.”
“I wouldn’t say that, Blair,” Todd replied. “You’re a good man. She’d be lucky to have you.”
He drew in a breath. “I knew her years ago. We were just friends. But she wanted to settle down. I didn’t. At least, I didn’t until Elise charmed me to a wedding chapel in Vegas.”
“That ended badly.”
“Yes, and now Janet’s taking over where Elise left off,” he laughed humorlessly. “It’s not working. I can’t stand the sight of her now. I had my attorney tell her that if she showed up in one more place I was, I’d have the police arrest her for stalking. I could make the charge stick, too.”
“That would hit her right in the pocketbook.”
“It’s the only vulnerable thing about her,” Blair sighed. He looked around the lonely hotel room in Germany and thought absently that he spent his whole life in hotels. He had a house that he never saw. He hated it, because it was empty. Like he was empty. Like his life was empty.
“Maybe I need a break from business,” he added.
“It might help.”
“Don’t let her marry the health nut, Todd,” Blair said quietly.
“I can’t stop her from doing anything she wants to,” came the wry reply. “You know that.” He paused. “If you want to stop her, get down here and do it yourself.”
Blair pursed his lips. “I might just do that. Of course, people would talk.”
“People always talk. So what?”
He smiled. “I’ll phone you the night before I come down.”
“That works. Be careful over there.”
“I’m always careful. See you.”
“See you.”
If he’d wondered how his best friend would feel about him and Niki, he had the answer. He felt as if a weight had been lifted from him. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe it could work between them. He remembered the feverish hunger Niki had for him, the love shining out of her bright eyes, the response she couldn’t even hide when he held her.
He ground his teeth together. First order of business was to get home and see Niki.
* * *
“NIKI, YOU’RE FALLING BEHIND,” Dan muttered, coming back to see about her. “You have to keep up.”
“I’m...trying...” she panted. It was hard to even draw a breath. Her harebrained scheme felt more and more ridiculous as she tried to get air into her lungs. The problem was that she couldn’t get it out in the first place. Air came in and stayed.
She felt dizzy. She looked at Dan with eyes that barely saw him through the discomfort.
“I...can’t...breathe,” she whispered.
“You have to just work your lungs,” he said curtly. “Come on, Niki, just breathe!”
If she’d had the strength, she’d have smacked him in the head with all her strength. She didn’t even have enough wind to answer him.
An older woman in the party, Nancy, came back to see about her, frowning.
“Niki, do you have your inhaler?” the woman asked gently.
Niki managed to shake her head. “Forgot...it...”
The woman lifted Niki’s hand and stared at her fingernails, then at her lips. “Call 911,” she told Dan. “Do it right now!”
“But we’re almost halfway through the hike,” Dan said, not comprehending. “She can make it. She just needs to rest a minute or two and concentrate on her breathing.”
“You lamebrained idiot!” the woman snapped at him. “She’s cyanotic, can’t you see?” She held Niki’s blue fingernails up to him. “She’ll go into anaphylactic shock and die if you don’t get help for her right now!”
“Oh, that’s ridiculous,” Dan started to argue.
Niki started wheezing violently and fell to the ground.
“I’m a nurse. I know a medical emergency when I see one!” She pulled out her cell phone and dialed 911.
CHAPTER NINE
NIKI WAS AIRLIFTED out of the area by helicopter. She didn’t remember much of the trip. She was given an injection and oxygen, and the nurse on the hike who’d called 911, Nancy, went with them, helping the EMT with the saline drip.
“Of all the stupid men I’ve ever seen in my life,” the nurse was raging. “The fool wanted to wait and make her hike the rest of the way!”
The EMT shook his head. “I’ve seen people die like this. It doesn’t take long, either. Good thing you were there and knew what to do.”
“Good thing I always carry strong black coffee in a thermos wherever I go,” the nurse said with a smile. She’d fed coffee to Niki while they waited for the helicopter. “How are you doing, sweetheart?” she asked Niki, touching her hand lightly.
Niki managed to nod and gave the woman a weary smile. Her own stupid idea had led to all this trouble, and she couldn’t admit to these kind people that she’d been hoping not to be saved in time. Looking back, it was a terrible way to die. She could still hardly get her breath.
“Not a lot of people know about strong coffee stopping asthma attacks,” the EMT chuckled. “I used it on a coworker who didn’t even know he was asthmatic until he started coughing around a flower bed and couldn’t stop. Some people cough instead of wheeze. He went to a doctor and was diagnosed.”
“How did you know about it?” the nurse asked, curious.
He smiled. “I’m asthmatic myself.”
She smiled back. “I’ll bet you don’t go on hiking trails with brain-dead idiots.”
“Not like the one leading your group, and that’s a fact,” he said flatly. “He went on to the end with the rest of them, I gather?”
“Oh, yes, couldn’t be bothered to make sure Niki was all right.” She leaned forward. “He thought she was faking it for attention!”
Niki blocked out the conversation around her and closed her eyes. The coffee had tasted nice, and it had helped the spasms. She’d have to remember to do something nice for the kind lady who’d helped her. But she was still left with the terror ahead, and didn’t know how she was going to cope. It would be horrible for her father, who’d already gone through it once.
But he didn’t know yet, and she’d made Doctor Fred promise not to tell
him. It was her burden. It was her decision. When she finally decided what she was going to do, she’d tell him then.
* * *
DOCTOR FRED CHECKED her out in the emergency room, where he was on duty that morning. He gave her a very angry glare when he discovered that she didn’t have a rescue inhaler with her.
“Dan says I’m pampering myself too much,” she said hoarsely. “He says I don’t need inhalers or preventatives, I just need—” she paused for breath “—herbs and vitamins and fresh...air.”
“The fresh air damned near killed you. You tell him that!” he said irritably. “I can’t believe your father lets you date such a fool!”
“I just turned...twenty-three,” she pointed out.
“Age and maturity are two separate things,” he said curtly. He finished his examination. “You’re better, but I’m keeping you overnight.”
“I won’t have the test, so don’t start,” she told him.
He ground his teeth together. “It could be nothing,” he pointed out. “It could be a lot of things besides what you’re afraid of.”
She lay back down and winced. “My chest hurts.”
“You’ve got bad bronchitis. We’ll treat that while you’re here. Antibiotics and rest. And no more damned hiking expeditions!”
She shrugged. “He said it would help me.”
He didn’t reply. He wanted to slug the man who’d taken her on that hike. When her father found out, it was going to take some muscle to save Dan Brady. And if Blair Coleman found out, the young man had better be on his way out of the country.
“Did you call your father?” Doctor Fred asked.
She winced.
“You don’t have your cell phone with you, either, do you?” He glowered at her.
“No.”
“I guess Dan thought that would be bad for you, too,” he muttered as he left her to the nurse. “Get her into a room, please,” he called over his shoulder. “I’ll call her father.”
“Yes, Doctor,” the nurse replied, smiling at Niki.
* * *