“Sure,” she rolled her eyes. “And we’re done.”
I sagged in relief.
“For now.”
“Evil woman,” I muttered as we made our way to the register, the sound of her laughter at my back.
“Payback Colt. It’s been said she can be a real bitch.”
In that moment I realized just how great things were between us. How great they could be if we made this official. But she wasn’t there yet and I didn’t know what to do to get her there. Something held her back and until I figured out what, we would be stuck. Not that here was bad, here had earth shattering sex, lots of laughter and great conversation. Here had me spending copious amounts of time with Jaya. Naked. Clothed. All over the damn city.
“Dinner at your place?”
She smiled and moved in close, wrapping both arms around my waist. “Desserts on me.”
Jaya
It was official. Colt and I were in an unofficial relationship. We’d been spending so much time together that even I couldn’t deny we had fallen back into a relationship. We spent an entire weekend shopping. For my house and his penthouse. We cooked together, made cocktails now that my painkillers were needed less and less. And damn did we make love for endless hours. The things he did to my body were hard to forget especially when I buzzed in a continuous hum all day long.
And worst of all I was falling in love with him all over again.
Against my better judgment.
But I couldn’t help it. Colt was exactly the man I knew he would be from the moment I met him. Not only was he successful but he was kind and caring, gentle and sweet. And bossy as hell, in and out of the bedroom. Yeah, I felt a weird sort of bliss that left me uneasy and waiting for the other shoe to drop.
It had to, right? Two months of an adult relationship with Colt and things had to go wrong. Didn’t they?
But they didn’t. Things only got better between us, which is how I ended up at a bed and breakfast in northern Wisconsin with Colt. For the whole weekend.
“This place is amazing!” A large blue Victorian home, surrounded by lush green gardens. But inside was the real treat. Two sitting rooms, each with a stone hearth bisected the house. The room, decorated in blue and gold, held a large four poster bed with a gold and blue damask duvet. A writing desk sat under the window and a small closet for our belongings. We even had an en suite bathroom, I assume for couples who never came up for air.
“It’s pretty great, right?” At his proud smile and puffed out chest, and all I could do was wrap my arms around him and squeeze tight.
“You did good, babe.” He froze and so did I, right there in the middle of the room. I knew why I did, but why did he?
His smile melted my heart, damn him. “You called me babe.”
“I did.”
“I like it.” He smiled, cupping my face gently and staring into my eyes as he slowly lowered his mouth to mine. “So much,” he said against my lips and I smiled. Then his mouth was on mine, devouring and conquering until I practically climbed up his body to get a better taste of him. He tasted like mint and cola, and something that was one hundred percent Colt. Addictive and intoxicating.
“So, you wanna test out the bed and then see about food or…?”
“I don’t think places like this do room service,” he told me as he pushed me towards the bed, his mouth on mine again, tracing a path of fire down my neck, opening my shirt and kissing down my belly.
“Then I guess,” I groaned when his mouth closed around a nipple, “we better be quick.”
“How quick?” he asked as he helped me out of my jeans and sweater, then the sexy lingerie I’d worn just for him.
“Really quick,” I told him and stood, stripping him out of his clothes, giving myself a sexy little striptease. “Damn you really are hot.”
His deep chuckle vibrated against my hands caressing his chest muscles, laughing at the way they jumped. “Well thank you, sweetness.”
“Anytime.” Hand to his chest, I shoved gently until he fell backwards on the bed, smiling up at me with that sexy as sin look. “And I’m in charge.”
“Hell yeah!”
I laughed and climbed on him, kissing every inch of his beautiful body until his groans got so loud, so erotic that I couldn’t stand it. I took him in my mouth because his long, thick cock made my mouth water. Because the sounds he made as I licked and sucked him made me so wet I knew he’d slide right in for a quick, hard ride. I took him deep and he growled, yanking my hair until I stared at him with what I was sure were swollen pink lips.
“Yeah?”
“I promise to fuck your sweet mouth this weekend, but right now I need to get inside you.”
Well damn. “That’s what I like to hear,” I told him as I straddled his waist. His hands gripped my hips and I gripped his cock, slowly sinking down on his hard length. “Yes!” It felt so good and being in this position meant I could feel every inch of him, filling me up and stretching me out deliciously.
I moved in a slow up and down motion until the lovin’ took over my body, turned it into a pleasure-seeking vehicle that only lived to come. Colt gripped my hips, his fingers sinking into me hard enough to bruise, but I didn’t care, not with the way he growled my name. At the feel of him swelling inside of me, hardening, I lost control, palming his chest for leverage as I bounced and rolled my hips in a move that had him speaking unintelligently and I could only smile as my body tensed. Flooded. Tightened around him as my orgasm drew closer.
“Fuck, Jaya.” He gripped me harder, holding me still while he pounded up into me hard and fast, and oh so deep the orgasm tumbled out of me so fast I fell on top of him.
He flipped our positions and pounded into me, hips moving in a frantic motion that had another orgasm building inside of me, milking him and pulling him in deeper. “Ah Jaya. Fuck!” I felt him spurting into me, his big body vibrating and pulsing violently with the force of his own orgasm. “Shit!”
“That was the best quickie ever!”
“Even better than the bathroom?”
I laughed. “Well that one was special, but this one was hot. Super sexy. I think I’m still coming.”
“Oh sweetheart, you’re good for my ego.”
“Like you need it.” He knew he was hot shit and didn’t need me to tell him, not with the way my body continued to pulse around him.
“It’s always nice to hear, especially from a beautiful woman who just rocked my world.” He punctuated every word with a long hard thrust. And then another.
Needless to say, we never made it out of the room for dinner that first night.
Or the rest of the weekend.
By the time we drove back to the city I felt pretty confident there was no shoe dropping in our future. So I resolved that I would talk to him, settle our past once and for all so we could work on our future.
If we had one.
Colt
“Hey pretty lady, did you miss me?” I hadn’t spent much time with Ma in the past couple of weeks, so I offered to take her out to dinner.
Of course I get to her house and she’s cooked a full meal.
“I always miss my boys when they’re not here with me.” Looking over her shoulder with a smile, Ma looked beautiful. “Haven’t seen much of you lately.”
I raked a hand through my hair which was well past due for a cut, but Jaya loved running her fingers through it so I kept putting it off. “Been busy with work.”
“And Jaya,” she added with a wide cheesy grin.
“Yes Ma, with Jaya.” She was fishing and I knew I wouldn’t get out of here tonight without a full interrogation. So I grabbed a beer and settled in.
“Put that beer back young man, we’re having my famous lasagna which means we’re having wine. Open the red,” she said, pointing with that wooden spoon that would forever give me and Garrett nightmares.
I poured us both a glass, picking at the olives she’d set out with cheese and crispy bread triangles. “What have you been
up to Ma?”
“Sharon and I signed up for a Zumba class! It’s fun but, damn we work up a sweat!” She laughed and told me all about moving her hips in a figure eight motion that had caused a man to ask her on a date.
“You’re a beautiful woman Ma, of course he asked you out. But don’t be showing him your hip moves too soon, okay?” She laughed and shook her head, bringing salad to the table.
“Why not? I have needs and I’m not looking for another husband.”
I choked on my wine and glared at her. “Ma, please.”
“Fine,” she lifted her hands in a defensive gesture, looking far too innocent for a woman talking about needs. “Since you don’t want to hear about my love life, tell me about yours.”
I walked right into that, and her smug smile confirmed it. “Real smooth, Ma.”
She laughed with her whole body, dropping lettuce on the table as she scooped up salad. “Sorry but you walked right into that one. I do want to know what’s up with you and Jaya though. Sharon said she called three times last week and you were there. Plus, I hear you took her away for the weekend. Sounds serious.”
It was serious, at least I thought so. “I’m not really sure Ma. We do spend a lot of time together and I think she has feelings for me, but there’s something holding her back. I just wish I knew what it was.”
“So you love her? Still? Again?”
“Jeez Ma, ask the easy questions, why don’t you?” I shrugged, but it was my mother and she only wanted me to be happy. “I never stopped loving her. I left because I had to do it in order to achieve my goals. Goals I thought would lay the foundation for our life together.” It killed me that she didn’t see that. Refused to understand it.
“Did you ever tell her these plans were for your future? Did you even indicate you wanted a future with her?”
Shit. No I hadn’t. “How could she not have known? We’d been best friends since first grade, dated since eight grade. I loved her and wanted to marry her!” She knew all that, hell we talked about it all the time.
“That was the plan, yes. But then you show up one day and tell her you’re leaving. That the plans you both had made together had suddenly changed. From that she was supposed to get that not everything had changed, just mostly everything?”
The egg timer buzzed and she hopped up as though she hadn’t just thoroughly shaken my faith in the past, to pull the lasagna from the oven.
“Dammit, Ma!” How could I not have seen this all these years? No wonder she’d been so angry to see me. “She’s never going to open up to me fully, is she?” Was there even a point in trying to win her back? Maybe I should be happy with what we had, but goddammit I wasn’t. Jaya was mine and we belonged together. I would do whatever it took to make her see it. To make her believe it.
“Of course she will, it’s just…you need to understand something Colt. When you left, Jaya was devastated. And then when she-,” she let out a long breath and shook her head. “My point is that getting over you wasn’t easy for her so if she needs time, then you need to give it to her.”
I nodded and accepted the plate of lasagna she handed to me but my mind couldn’t help but linger on the interrupted sentence. Ma knew something that might help me get Jaya to open up to me, and I needed to get it out of her.
“Tell me Ma,” I began, but my phone rang and Ethan was on the other line. “We’re not done,” I told her and picked it up. “Yeah?”
“I need you out here in D.C. Colt. We have a chance for a long-term security contract assisting different DoD agencies in the field. It’s a big contract man.”
Shit this was it. What I’ve been working towards this for years. “I’ll be on the next flight out.”
“Good. I’m at The Jefferson, Ann’s already working on getting you a room.”
Shit. That meant I’d be there a few days. “See you soon.” I disconnected the call and gave Ma an apologetic look. “I have to go Ma.”
She nodded, already on her feet at the counter. “I figured. Take this with you, eat it on that fancy jet of yours.”
“Thanks Ma. Love you.” I took the glass container and turned away before I froze. “Ma, and when she what?”
“Huh?” I knew her well enough to know when she was being truthful and right now her expression told me she knew a secret I needed to know.
“Ma you said Jaya was devastated, and when she…, and then you stopped. Finish your sentence, please.”
She shook her head and slid past me to the door. “I’ve already said too much son. Now go on and have a safe trip.” With that she gave me a peck on the cheek and shoved me out the door.
I wanted nothing more than to get in my car and rush to Jaya’s house and demand she tell what apparently everyone else knew. But I couldn’t. this contract was everything I had worked for. It was part of the reason Jaya and I had split up in the first place. I had to do this, or it would be like spitting on the memory of what we had.
Unfortunately, when I got to D.C. there were enough details relating to the business deal to keep me there for a full week. It had been a very lucrative and productive trip but it had taken me too far away from Jaya for too long.
The first few days we talked every day. She told me about her day and I told her what I could about the goings on in Washington. By Wednesday she’d grown quiet and then withdrawn. When Saturday rolled around I was up early and calling the pilot to get me back to Chicago as soon as possible Then I received a call from one of our tactical leaders.
Chicago would have to wait because I was needed down in Mexico to help get a couple rich of college kids out of a cartel mansion. I don’t know what the fuck these idiots were doing deep in Sinaloa country, but I was sure they regretted it now. The trip took a few hours during which I tried to reach Jaya no less than six times, but she never answered.
Something was wrong, I just knew it. But there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it right now. So I turned off my phone, coordinated with logistics. I hoped it might have been Jaya manning the station, but again, it wasn’t. All I could do at this point was focus on getting two rich assholes out of Mexico without getting any of my men hurt or killed in the process.
Still it pissed me off. She could at least return my call and let me know she’s all right. But…maybe I’d read this all wrong. Maybe we weren’t both falling in love again. Deeper in love. Maybe I was the dumbass falling in love, while Jaya was out for revenge, or maybe just a fling. Was I her rebound from her life falling apart?
Shit! I hated this part of relationships, and it had never been this difficult between me and Jaya.
Why was it so difficult now when it had been so perfect before?
“Yo Boss, we need to get the hell out of here. Now!”
I blinked at Gabe’s harsh words and ducked into the jet. The sun hadn’t risen yet and we needed to get the fuck out of dodge before anyone realized their prisoners had been taken and no ransom would be paid.
Finally though, I was headed back to Chicago.
Back to Jaya.
And back to reality. Whatever that was for us.
Jaya
I hated this time of year. Wished I could sleep through it every single year, and most years I could, because I rarely took time off work for personal matters. This year though, everything had conspired against me.
First, I’d planned a special meal so that Colt and I could hash out the details of the past. I know, Mom was right that it was a long time ago and I should really be over it by now. But I wasn’t. I didn’t think I would ever be over it, but I did think there was a possibility I could forgive Colt so that we could move forward.
In fact, I was worried that I had already forgiven him. But dinner was supposed to help me figure it out. Only he’d called about twelve hours later to tell me he was in the air on his way to D.C. for work. I could respect that if he hadn’t already stood me up, making me think about the last time he’d left me hanging. Still we talked on the phone and things seemed okay if a little
strained on my part.
Then he went to Mexico and hadn’t even bothered to tell me. Which, funnily enough, told me exactly where I stood in this relationship. So when he finally remembered I existed, I hadn’t bothered picking up any of his calls. Childish, I know, but I couldn’t get over my hurt.
By the time this week rolled around, I was a complete wreck. I’d called Ann and told her I wouldn’t be in until Wednesday, claiming sickness. Heartsick counts, right? This was the week I had lost everything and I was a blubbering mess all over again. How this pain could still consume me, a decade later, seemed unfathomable. But from the moment I’d woken up an unbearable sadness had pinned me to the bed. Full of melancholy, with a heavy heart that made every breath hurt.
I went through the same ritual I did every year, digging the memory box out of the back of my closet. Covered in pink, red and white roses, I pulled the lid off and the tears came straight away at the sight of the little booties with teddy bears on them. I pulled out the first and only sonogram image I had of my baby, a U.S. Navy t-shirt I’d bought when it became clear Colt had no interest in being a father. The tears came in a deluge as I took in every memory sprawled all over the sofa and the coffee table. Then I sank back into the devastation of that time. Alone.
Completely and totally alone. Eventually I’d come clean to my mom and she did her mother thing, soothing and comforting me. At least providing any comfort that could be had after miscarrying a child. Which, as it turns out, was none.
Even today it hurt as bad as it had the first time around. I knew it wasn’t healthy, but I felt hopeful that clearing the air with Colt, finding out why he’d never said a word, not even a “I don’t want to be a dad,” would help me heal.
Now someone’s fist tried to beat down my door. Standing on shaky legs I scanned the living for the box of tissues that would make me appear not so frightening to whoever was trying to get my attention. I did the best I could, wiping away tears and drying my nose as I padded towards the door on leaden legs. The moment my fist curled around the doorknob I knew it was Colt, and though I didn’t want to have the conversation this way, he’d taken the choice out of my hands.
His Takeover: An Enemies to Lovers Romance Page 17