The Alphabet Game the Complete Alpha Series a to X, Y, Z

by Andie M. Long

  Then I pick up the pregnancy test.

  S to X, Y, Z.

  THE ALPHABET GAME

  PART FOUR

  S TO X, Y, Z.

  Chapter 1

  I clean up the blood from my split lip, wincing, whilst I wait for the minutes to pass. The test rests on the side of the bath.

  He fucking left me. It’s a pattern that seems destined to repeat. I love you, you leave me.

  Time’s up. I pick up the test.

  I study it for minutes, before tears start to run down my cheeks. I wipe them away and go to lay on the bed, where I stare into space.

  I meet Ronnie outside the apartment building at five.

  She takes note of my bruised mouth, ‘What the fuck happened?’

  I embrace her in a hug. ‘Let’s get inside and I’ll explain.’

  ‘I was going to argue to stay in my own apartment, but looking at you, I think I just changed my mind.’

  I squeeze her even harder. ‘It shouldn’t be that I need you as much as you need me, I’m supposed to be looking after you.’

  ‘Let’s just view it as girly time. Now cheer up or my Dad will take me back home with him.’

  Her dad brings her suitcase around and bids us farewell, giving my face a strange look as I smile at him, but saying nothing other than to call him if he’s needed.

  As we walk past the coffee shop and automatically peer in, I see Col pressed up against the counter being snogged by Suzanne. Of all the times.

  ‘Oh Ronnie.’

  She huffs, ‘Well wouldn’t you look at that? He has a cock after all, who knew?’

  ‘I’m sure it’s nothing serious.’

  ‘I don’t care, I’m having a little break from boys and their toys.’

  ‘Come on,’ I grab her arm, ‘It’s just us two girls right now; let’s go and get a drink of water instead.

  ‘Yes,’ Ronnie sighs, ‘I have to be on my very best behaviour where alcohol is concerned right now.’

  ‘Me too,’ I mumble under my breath, ‘Me too.’

  ‘Jesus, there’s a bedroom here, when did that happen?’

  I lean against the door, ‘I changed it especially for you. It took hours, lady so don’t mess it up.’

  Ronnie starts to check the bed. ‘There’s just one thing before I commit to staying here.’

  ‘Oh yes, what’s that Madam, looking for bed bugs?’

  ‘I’m just checking I have the same awesome mattress you have, so I’m not going to be like the Princess and the Pea. Oh I do, that’s me sorted.’ She gets into the bed. ‘I’ll have a sparkling mineral water please.’

  ‘Looks like the Princess is alive and well to me. I think you’ll find it’s tap water here, lady. I’ll get you it this once and then you can move your petite derriere and get your own.’

  ‘This establishment sucks big, hairy balls.’

  ‘No, it doesn’t, we’re off men.’

  I get us some water and then I return and pass Ronnie the stick.

  ‘Uhm, what the FUCKING hell?’

  ‘Ronnie, you’re holding it from the side I peed on.’

  ‘Euurggh, God almighty, what did you pass it to me for then? I don’t do watersports. You’re pregnant? Are you shitting me?’

  ‘Nope,’ I say, looking at the test again, then I burst into tears once more.

  ‘Oh Stella, what the fuck did he do now, apart from knocking you up? I tell you what, this is probably going to be a long story. Let’s order a Chinese and you can tell me whilst we’re waiting, only I’m bloody starving.’

  Ronnie opens the door to the deliveryman. Except it isn’t.

  I hear her voice, ‘Oh Gabe, you’ve cocked up this time. What were you thinking?’

  ‘I need to see her.’ I can hear the desperation in his tone.

  ‘I can’t allow that right now, she’s in a bad way.’

  He pleads. ‘I can make it all right, don’t you see? STELLA,’ he shouts, ‘I was in shock, I shouldn’t have left. I need to see you, please?’

  What transpires next could be sheer rage or pregnancy hormones. I don’t know. All I see, as if I’ve departed my own body, is that I fly into the lounge, to the doorway, past Ronnie and I attack Gabe, slapping him in the face, my nails raking down his cheek.

  ‘YOU FUCKING LEFT ME.’

  He puts his hands up to protect his head. ‘I know.’

  ‘With your father.’ I shout, ‘Just after he hinted he might have killed my own.’ I feel my cheeks flush with heat.

  He rubs the back of his neck, ‘I know. There’s no good excuse, I panicked, I -. What the fuck happened to your mouth?’

  ‘Your father happened to my mouth.’

  His hands clench into fists, ‘What did he do to you?’

  My eyes narrow, ‘You’d have known if you were there. Now get the hell out. I don’t want to see you.’

  ‘But the baby?’ His voice breaks.

  My nostrils flare. ‘At the moment your father announced my pregnancy, I hadn’t yet actually done a test. There may or there may not be a baby. Right now you don’t deserve to know. Now fuck off.’ With a final burst of energy, I thrust my hands onto his chest, though I still notice the toned body beneath my fingers, and I push him out of the door.

  A voice seeps through the wood. ‘I made a mistake, but I’ve no intention of giving up Stella. I’ll be back, you can bet your firm tight ass on that, pregnant or not.’

  Feeling shaky and depleted, I walk off to my room, Ronnie following behind.

  ‘Woah, sister,’ she raises her hands, ‘I’m shit-scared. Is there a lock on my door? Only you were like a feral animal then.’

  ‘Hormones.’ Another tear falls down my cheek. ‘And why do I keep sodding crying, aaarrrrgh.’

  ‘I’m beginning to think I was safer in Roehampton,’ winks Ronnie.

  A usual Friday night for Ronnie and myself would be to get ready together in one of our apartments, dance tracks blaring whilst we fix ourselves up with sexy party dresses and extremely high-heeled shoes. Hair would be blow dried and straightened, nails polished and then the taxi would be ordered to take us to party central. In a total turnaround of our usual habits, the next couple of days see us in pyjamas, watching movies whilst remaining under the duvet and consuming lots of water, chocolate and crisps. There are tissues at the side of the bed for me, and a gardening book at the side of the bed for Ronnie. At various times of the day you can find either one of us asleep on the sofa or on the bed; mine due to pregnancy exhaustion and Ronnie as she physically recovers. When she does get the nail polish out in an attempt at making ourselves feel better, the smell has me running for the toilet. Everything smells so strong right now.

  We sit on the sofa looking out over the Thames. The sun is shining in, making the apartment really warm.

  Ronnie goes over to open the doors and gasps, ‘Uh-oh, Stella, you’d best come out here.’

  I shake my head. ‘I don’t do balconies.’

  ‘Get your butt out here right now.’

  I huff, but do as she says. As I look out, on the grass below us, I see ‘I’m sorry,’ spelt out in M&Ms.

  ‘I’ll be right back.’ I tell her.

  I put my shoes on and leave the apartment, Ronnie in hot pursuit. She runs into the lift before it closes.

  ‘What are you doing?’

  My jaw is tense when I utter, ‘It requires a response.’

  Reaching the ground floor, I exit the lift and open the rear doors onto the communal area. I run up to the M&Ms and kick my way through the piles until there’s just a complete mess of them and I’m struggling for breath. I sit on the bench nearby, getting my breath back. Some young boys come running over.

  ‘They your sweets?’ they ask me.

  ‘They’re anybodies. You want some?’

  ‘Sick, only our mum wouldn’t let us touch them cos of the message right? But now they’re all messed up so can we eat them?’

  ‘Have as many as you like.’

  They l
ook at each other like it’s Christmas. ‘Wow, that’s beast. Let’s tell the others.’ They run off to get their mates and I head back to the apartment.

  Once back I take a photo of the mess on my phone and send it to Gabe, with the words, ‘Not anywhere near good enough.’

  ‘What’ve you just sent him?’ Ronnie asks and I show her.

  ‘Not good enough? Hhhmm, Stella, I think that’s just informed him that you want him to work harder. You’re not telling him to do one altogether then?’

  I sigh, throwing down the phone, then myself onto the sofa. ‘No. I love the bastard. Can’t turn it the hell off. When I saw the M&Ms, all I could think of was how he put bowls of them in my room and in the hotel. I know he panicked that day and I do understand why, the pregnancy news after what he’s just gone through was a huge shock. But he still left me with his father and I’m not ready to let him off the hook yet.’

  ‘So you’re going to let him squirm?’

  ‘Absolutely.

  ‘Hahahaha, I love it. Let’s think of things we can get him to do.’

  We spend the afternoon coming up with tasks and Ronnie texts him.

  The next morning at ten am sharp, the clipper boat goes past with Gabe on it, holding up a banner saying ‘I’m sorry, I’m an idiot.’ We’d not specified attire, but he’s dressed in shorts with his bare chest exposed and idiot written on it in capital letters. Myself and Ronnie stand on the balcony watching him. He points us out to his fellow passengers and they all yell ‘Forgive him.’ I don’t give him a response, we both return back inside. Then we sit on the settee and giggle. He did it. I try not to think about his naked chest and blame the fact I’m feeling so hot on the summer’s day.

  At lunchtime Pizza is delivered. Inside the box is written ‘Forgive me?’ in Gabe’s scrawly handwriting.

  At one pm pieces of lined A4 paper stating in his handwriting, ‘I am a complete twat and regret my actions,’ written five hundred times come through the letter box.

  ‘I’m loving this grovelling,’ I tell Ronnie.

  ‘It is kind of fun,’ she grins.

  At two pm chocolate slabs are left on reception. Handwritten icing on them once again gives his apologies.

  Around three ish, it’s a dozen lemon cupcakes.

  He’s met all the items on our list. Now I have to decide if I’ve forgiven him.

  But Gabe hasn’t finished. At four pm I’m told yet another parcel has been delivered to reception. When I open it, inside are matching his and hers t-shirts. One says ‘Gabe’s babe’ and the other says ‘Stella’s fella.’

  At five pm he sends a musician round who sings Sweet Talkin’ Woman to me. Ronnie is uncharacteristically gobsmacked and stands looking at me with her arms crossed.

  ‘Jeez Stel, if a guy did this lot for me, I’d fucking have his babies. Oh that’s right, you are.’ She fixes me with a look, ‘Go put the poor bugger out of his misery.’

  That’s my undoing, she’s right, why am I still here? I rush to call him but there’s no answer.

  I keep trying all evening but there’s no reply.

  At nine pm I head down to the pool for a last swim before it closes. I need something to do, because now I’ve decided I want to speak to him, the fact he’s not answering the phone has me so frustrated and I can’t keep still. As usual at this time I have the pool to myself. Again the water soothes me as it folds itself around my body in comforting warm swirls and I start my laps. I swim for a while, lost in the rhythm of the strokes until my body tires somewhat and I decide to take a break. I push up at the end of the pool and startle. He’s there.

  I climb up the pool steps, out of the water, a heavy bodied feeling coming over me as I do so, and I walk over to him. He’s sitting in one of the spectator chairs.

  A tic pulses in his cheek. ‘I saw I missed your calls. I came to see what they said.’

  I shrug, ‘They said give Ronnie her key back.’

  He sighs, looking at the floor and gets up from the seat. I see him glance at the door and know he’s about to leave.

  ‘I’m joking.’

  His voice is firm and like ice, ‘I’m beyond jokes now, you’re killing me Stella. I don’t know if there’s my baby in there or not.’ He points at my stomach. ‘You’re being beyond cruel.’

  I realise just what a bitch I’ve been tormenting him. My eyes fill up as regret floods my brain.

  I sweep my wet hair back from my face, ‘I never thought. I was so angry. I’m so sorry.’

  I lift up his hands and place them on my stomach.

  ‘Gabe, meet our baby.’

  Gabe sucks in a breath, and stares at me. ‘Oh my God,’ he strokes my stomach with the tips of his fingers. ‘Really? You’re pregnant?’

  I lift his hand off my stomach, ‘Gabe, I know you felt you were free and now -’

  He places his finger across my mouth. ‘Yes, I am free. Free from being shackled to a son who couldn’t know me, and from his mother whom I don’t love.’

  I bite on my lip.

  ‘But you, Stella, you have my baby in there. The most fucking beautiful woman I ever met is pregnant with my child. Don’t you get it? You’re sexier than ever to me Stella. I’m going to be the best Dad you’ve ever fucking seen. The lessons of the past can help make the future. You get what I’m saying don’t you? I don’t give a damn how long we’ve been together.’

  I nod. Water is dripping from me, running over his hand.

  He runs his hand from my stomach up over the curve of my breast, pulls the strap of my costume off my shoulder, then the other and lets it fall.

  ‘S is for submit Stella. Give yourself to me.’

  Slowly, I step out of the costume and fix my hands around his neck. His hand caresses my skin, coming to rest on my naked stomach.

  ‘I’m yours,’ I whisper as his tongue claims mine.

  Chapter 2

  I shiver, unsure if it’s his touch or the cooling water resting atop my skin. His hand reaches out and tucks a strand of hair behind my ear. He leans into me, his tongue licking lazy circles up my neck, his stubble grazes my flesh. He moves and I feel his warm breath against my ear, his teeth nip the edge of my lobe and then his tongue gains entry inside. I shiver as his tongue licks around my inner ear, and I feel my pussy contract. Shivering again, my breasts harden against his chest. I place my fingers on his shirt buttons but he stops me.

  ‘No. Submit. Drop your arms and just enjoy.’

  I place my arms by my side.

  ‘Look at me.’

  I do what he asks. As I look at him, I see his eyes glint with a dangerous edge. He cups my chin in his hand and brings my face to his. Our lips meet and meld against each other. He thrusts his tongue roughly into my mouth, searching out my own. When he breaks the kiss, I gaze at the man in front of me. The front of his shirt and trousers are wet from where I’ve been held against him. His white shirt now has patches of transparency through which I can see his firm chest, which is rising and falling with his deep breathing. It’s killing me not to open that shirt. Slowly, his hands trail down my arms, raising goosebumps. Fingers trail up the sides of my waist, feather light touches I can barely take. His hands skim my breasts carefully, his head bows and he teases my nipples with his tongue.

  I groan.

  He smiles. ‘Come with me.’

  I follow him into the relaxation area. There’s no-one around but he blocks the door with a chair anyway. He lays a large fluffy white towel across one of the couches and then wraps me in another. Slowly he dries every part of my body with the towel. As he dries and uncovers each part his lips follow the trail of the towel. I’m so near the brink and he hasn’t even touched me there yet.

  He pushes me back on the couch and pulls my legs apart and then trails that mouth from the instep of my feet up to the apex of my thighs. I feel myself get wet. He kneels on the floor and pulls my legs further toward him, wrapping my legs behind his back. As his head descends between my legs and he begins nibbling, licking an
d teasing my clit, he lifts a hand up to my breast fondling my nipple. He inserts a finger into my wetness and places his thumb on my clitoris. Fingers and tongue, I can’t bear it and I start to buck against him. He withdraws, pushes me back up the couch and raises himself on his arms above me.

  ‘Now you can come.’ He plunges into my wetness and the orgasm I was on the cusp of begins to shatter around his cock. I feel myself clenching and releasing around him. The feeling of him thrusting in me as my orgasm recedes is exquisite. Pregnancy has made my pussy more sensitive, I can’t get enough. I place my hands on his pert arse to push him into me more. He smiles, grabs my arms and holds them above my head. He holds off until I’ve calmed down and then starts to fuck me again, until I’m back at the brink. As I feel him build up and quicken, approaching his own climax I come again.

  ‘Oh my fucking God.’ My heart is thudding in my chest and I feel a little beat between my legs.

  ‘I think the words you are looking for are “Oh my fucking Gabe.”’

  I stretch out on my side like a cat on a lazy hot day, ‘Oh I suppose you did okay.’

  He smacks my backside. Then grabbing a couple more towels he places them over us and folds me into his arms, wrapping his legs around mine.

  We stay there like that for a while until I see the clock nearing eleven.

  ‘The pools about to close, we need to get dressed,’ I tell him.

  He nods. ‘What a shame. Meet me in the Reception area.’

  After showering I meet him in the reception. ‘So what now?’ I ask.

  He sighs, ‘I’m not sure you’re going to like what I have to say, but I don’t see another option.’

  ‘A month? I’m not going to see you for a month?’ I cross my arms over my chest.

  He steps away, raising his voice slightly. ‘We’re going to have to make it look like we’ve split up Stella. It’s the only way I can think to keep our baby safe at the moment. I’ve bought one of those pre-paid phones like you’ve got so we can keep in touch, but we can’t be seen together.’