by Anna Jacobs
She nodded. “Just give me a minute or two.”
* * * *
In the other room Ryan walked across to Caitlin, warmed by the smile that lit her face at the sight of him. “How are you feeling?”
“Just a little under the weather. I’ll be all right.”
Kit stood up. “Why don’t you two come back with me to my place? I think you need to talk to Laura in private and there’s plenty of room there.”
“Will Mother mind?” Ryan asked.
“I’ll ask her.” Kit limped across to the doorway into the side room and disappeared through it.
Caitlin looked up at Ryan. “I like him. And I think he’s very much in love with your mother from the look on his face when he speaks of her. What did your uncle want?”
He sat down beside her. “To read a letter from my grandfather, such a warm loving letter. I’m going to ask him for a copy and keep it. I do wish you could have met Pop.”
“So do I.”
Deb came to join them. “Am I interrupting something?”
Ryan smiled at her and tugged her to sit beside him. “No, of course not. Kit’s just invited us all back to his house so that Caitlin and I can explain about Dad and everything. You will come too, won’t you?”
She nodded.
Laura and Kit came out of the small room and joined them.
“I gather we’re all going back to Kit’s,” she said with careful self-restraint, avoiding looking at Caitlin.
“I’ll drive back with Ryan and show them the way,” Deb offered.
On the way Laura said very little.
“You’re still keeping me at a distance,” Kit chided mildly.
“It’s better that way, don’t you think?”
“Nope. Not when I don’t know what I’ve done to upset you. But you need to sort out your family problems before you and I have our talk, though I’m not going to wait much longer for that.”
She didn’t say anything.
At the house, she got out of the car with a feeling of dread. She didn’t know how she was going to cope with this confrontation - no, not confrontation, meeting. It was all right her father saying to get rid of her anger, but you couldn’t just decide to do that. It was still there inside her, hot and ready to rise up at the slightest provocation. Damn Craig! And damn that woman, too!
Once inside the house, she automatically went into the kitchen and put the coffee machine on.
Kit followed her. “Want me to be there when they explain - or not? Up to you.”
She paused to stare abstractedly out of the window. “No. Yes. I can’t think straight.”
“I love you, you know.”
She turned to stare at him but just as she was opening her mouth to tell him not to say things he didn’t mean, the doorbell rang.
“I’ll get it.”
She watched Kit go to open the door and lead everyone into the living room, and realised that he was limping badly. He’d done too much today. But how would she have coped without him?
In the sitting room Caitlin sat down with a sigh and pressed one hand to her forehead.
Ryan watched her anxiously.
Deb stared at Kit, trying to see him without anger. Her grandfather’s letter had shaken her to the core, reminding her of the time he’d stopped her and Angie from quarrelling. “Do you love my mother?” she asked suddenly.
His whole face brightened. “Oh, yes. Very much. Do you mind?”
“I’m trying not to.”
He grinned at this equivocal answer. “Keep trying, please, because I’m not going to stop.”
Laura came in, carrying a tray with the coffee pot on it. “I thought we’d have some proper coffee. Um - would you mind if Kit stayed with us?”
In the kitchen she’d tried to nerve herself to go through this on her own, and had found she couldn’t. She wanted Kit with her, even if he was two-timing her, because he was basically a kind man and would support her as much as he could. But after this was through, she’d tell him they had to return to an employer-employee footing because nothing could come of this. She couldn’t face another man being unfaithful to her, just couldn’t.
When they were all supplied with mugs of coffee, Ryan took charge, explaining simply and concisely Caitlin’s background and the reason she’d gone to live with his father.
“Some of those fringe religious sects can make life very difficult for those who try to opt out,” Kit said quietly.
Caitlin looked up. “And it’s difficult to move away because they brainwash you from birth. I didn’t want that for my child.” After a moment’s hesitation she added in a low voice, “I didn’t love Craig, but I was fond of him and I think I made him happy. I - um - think it was the thought of the child that pleased him most about our relationship. We were chalk and cheese in so many ways. If I hadn’t been feeling so unwell . . . ”
She glanced pleadingly at Laura, who managed a nod.
“Craig hated growing older and he loved the children he already had. I’m sorry I hurt you, Laura, more sorry than you can know. If I’d felt your marriage had any hope, I’d not have gone to live with him, but - ”
“It was over long before he met you,” Laura said in a tight, harsh voice. “We just hadn’t got round to doing anything about it. I think he was waiting for me to finish decorating the house, actually. And I was a coward, not able to walk away.”
Kit sent her a warm, approving glance.
Ryan was watching Caitlin.
“I want to give you the money back now, Laura,” she went on. “I don’t need it now and I never really deserved it, but I was frightened for my child, you see. I had to be able to keep it safe from my family. I couldn’t have borne it to lead a life like mine.”
Deb had been looking from one to the other, listening carefully and when Caitlin fell silent, she said suddenly, “He was the best of fathers, though. Like Pop was to you, Mum.”
And Laura was at least able to grant Craig that. “Yes. I know, love. It was just that his way of fathering got between me and you two, and that hurt. And he was unfaithful quite a bit towards the end. That hurt too.”
Deb stared at her very solemnly, then nodded. “Well, maybe you and I will be better friends now. I think Pop would want that.”
“I hope so.”
“Mind you, I’ll probably drive you mad at times. I’m not the most tactful of people.”
Laura leaned across to hug her. “Doesn’t matter. I’m not either.” Then she looked at Caitlin. “I’d like the house money back because I feel I earned it, but you can do what you want with the insurance money. I don’t want to profit from his death.”
Ryan put his arm round Caitlin. “And what about us two, Mum? Can you cope with that?”
There was a long silence, then, “I’ll - do my best. That’s all I can promise. I’m still not happy about the - the relationship. So we’ll have to see how it goes.”
Ryan stood up and scowled at her. “That’s as grudging an acceptance as I’ve ever heard.”
Caitlin stood up and tugged at his arm. “Don’t!”
He turned to her. “Don’t what?”
“Don’t say anything else. Let’s all just - try.”
He opened his mouth, his expression angry.
Kit judged it time to intervene because Laura was looking shocked by Ryan’s anger. “I agree with Caitlin. Don’t say any more just now, Ryan. Everyone’s feelings are too raw. Laura’s lost her father. Give her time to get over that.”
“I don’t have all that much time! We have to get back to Australia. I’ve a job waiting for me there.”
“Ryan, please - ” Suddenly Caitlin’s eyes rolled up and she crumpled to the floor, lying at Laura’s feet like a broken blossom.
Everyone stared down at her in shock for a moment, then Laura pushed Ryan out of the way and knelt to take her pulse. “Give us some room.”
“Mum’s done first aid courses,” Deb murmured to Kit.
“She’s full of hidden sur
prises. I like that.”
Caitlin gradually came to, but Laura was worried about her pallor. There wasn’t a vestige of colour in her face. “I think we need to take you to hospital just to make sure of things. Did you have a D & C after the miscarriage?”
“No.”
“You may have retained some small part of the placenta and have an infection. A friend of mine did years ago. It should be quite simple to clear up.”
“It won’t - stop me having other children?”
“Of course not.”
“I hate hospitals.”
Caitlin was clinging to her hand and Laura suddenly realised how terrified the younger woman was. “So do I. But you won’t be on your own.”
“You’ll come too?”
Laura nodded.
“Even though you still hate me?”
“I don’t hate you any more, just the situation. That’s different. Look, least said soonest mended now that we all know the full story. We’ll get through this, I’m sure. As long as you make my Ryan happy.”
The glow of love that suddenly lit up Caitlin’s eyes helped Laura to come to terms with the situation more than anything else had. There was no mistaking such love. It was what she’d always wanted for her children. And he was looking at Caitlin the same way. Why hadn’t she let herself accept that before? “Come on, then. Let’s get it over with.”
She turned to Kit and studied him. “You’re looking tired and I noticed your limp was worse. You’ve done far too much today, but I’m grateful. I needed you. We’ll take Caitlin to hospital then I’ll catch a taxi back.”
He nodded. She was right. His leg was aching furiously and he needed to lie with it up for a while. Besides, it might be better if she was the one they turned to for help.
“Thanks for everything.” She kissed his cheek, saw his wry smile as he pulled her to him and kissed her on the lips. She could feel herself flushing as she walked away, knowing her children had watched this exchange with great interest.
What she couldn’t understand was why he’d made such a point of kissing her like that in public.
* * * *
They were lucky to find the Emergency Section having a lull. Within the hour, Caitlin was whisked up to an operating theatre by a cheerful nurse, who told her how lucky it was she hadn’t had anything to eat that day.
Ryan sat down to wait as he’d sat in the hospital in Melbourne. Only this time he wouldn’t have Barry pestering him, and this time he was sure Caitlin wanted him there.
“I’ll wait with you, shall I?” Deb offered. “Angie and Aunt Sue were going back to the house to clear Gran’s things out. They don’t need me for that.”
“Thanks. I’d appreciate that.” He looked at his mother. “Kit’s not the only one who’s tired. You look exhausted too. Why don’t you get a taxi back now? I’ll ring and let you know as soon as we’re sure what’s happening here.”
And suddenly Laura could struggle on no longer. She did feel exhausted, as if every bone was made of rubber. She let Ryan walk her to the door and give her one of his hugs.
“Thanks, Mum - for everything.”
She patted his cheek. “Let me know how she is.”
In the taxi she leaned back against the seat as it pulled away. I’m trying, Dad, she thought. I did all right there, I think. I’m not as angry as I was because they do love one another, but I still feel upset inside.
She could almost hear his voice telling her to take it one step at a time.
But now she had a confrontation looming with Kit, because he would insist on knowing what had upset her. She couldn’t bear even to try to build a relationship with a man who’d betray her. Just couldn’t.
But could she bear to leave him?
Chapter 32
When Laura got back, Kit was sitting on the sofa with his leg up and his hands clasped round yet another mug of coffee. The crutches were propped beside him, which told her his leg was aching.
“The coffee’s still hot. Get yourself a cup.”
“It’s a wonder you can sleep at night, the amount you drink,” she said by way of a greeting.
“It’s not the coffee that’s keeping me awake.”
“Kit, please don’t - ”
“Please don’t what? Please don’t even talk to one another?” He grabbed her hand as she tried to move past him and drew her down on the edge of the sofa. “We have to sit down and talk.”
“Now isn’t the time. I need to start thinking about meals, so if you’d - ”
“Go into my office?”
“Yes.”
“Well, I won’t.” His voice rose in emphasis. “I’m not going anywhere until we’ve talked. How many times do I have to say it to get through to you?”
She took a shaky breath, trying to keep her voice steady, but failed. “I can’t do it now, Kit. I need to rest. Please. I promise we’ll talk tomorrow, but today I’m totally exhausted.”
He sighed. “Don’t you think you’d rest more easily if we cleared the air?”
She shook her head. She knew it was cowardly, but she wanted to delay the confrontation.
He spread his arms in a defeated gesture. “All right. I give you one more day, then we talk. And don’t bother getting any food ready. I’m not hungry.”
She got up quickly. “Thanks for your help today, Kit.” Not waiting for his answer, she hurried out of the room.
The trouble was, she thought as she started to climb the stairs, she didn’t know whether she was relieved or sorry that he hadn’t insisted. Maybe she should have stayed and had it out with him.
You’re a fool, Laura Wells, she told herself. You always fall for the wrong type of man.
* * * *
Kit followed her out into the hall, intending to go across to his office, but something drew his gaze towards the stairs. She was walking slowly, as if reluctant to go to her room. When she switched the stairs light off, he didn’t move, just stood there in the darkness and listened as she went into the bathroom. A short time later there was the sound of water flushing, then slow footsteps going across the landing into her bedroom above his head. She sounded weary.
He tried to make himself move away and couldn’t, so tried instead to work out what was wrong with him. Then suddenly his instincts took over from his reasoning, that feeling of knowing exactly what to do which had never let him down before. Hell, he’d been superhumanly patient with her. “Dammit, I’m not taking no for an answer,” he muttered. “It’s a misunderstanding, it’s got to be, and the longer it continues the further apart we’ll drift.”
His left leg was aching furiously so he went up the stairs even more slowly than she had done, making no attempt to keep quiet and pausing every few steps to rub the stiff place near his knee.
Her voice floated down from just above his head and he looked up to see her leaning over the banisters, silhouetted against the light from her bedroom. “What do you think you’re doing? You need to rest.”
“I’ve decided we have to have that talk now.”
“Kit, I told you: I’m too tired for confrontations. Please go back.”
“Nope.” He set off again.
“Well, you’ll be facing a locked door.” She whisked back into her bedroom and slammed the door shut, turning the old-fashioned key in the lock.
He continued to the top and leaned on the banisters for a minute, grinning at her last words. All the bedroom keys matched. He never had been able to figure out why. They were useless for locking people out - or in.
On the way to her bedroom, he collected the key from the next door. He stopped outside her room and knocked to get her attention. “Are you going to open this?”
“No.”
Very quickly he inserted the key into the hole, pushing sharply to knock the key on the other side out, a trick he’d perfected in his boyhood. He’d never thought it’d be so useful. Turning the key, he slammed the door wide open.
She was standing at the foot of the bed, panting a little as if
she’d been running, still dressed, her hair tumbled, her face flushed. To him she looked very sexy and he could feel his breathing deepen. She didn’t say anything as he moved slowly across the room, but she didn’t move away either, though she could easily have tried to push past him.
At the last minute his foot caught on the bedside rug and his weak leg gave way. With a yell he pitched forward. But she was there, catching him, steadying him. So he grabbed tight hold of her and pulled them both down on to the bed, kissing her just as she opened her mouth to protest.
Her lips were soft under his. He’d been wanting to kiss her properly for days. She wasn’t fighting now and after a shocked gasp, she suddenly began kissing him back.
He groaned as the inevitable reaction hit him, then thought what the hell? She’s seen a man with the hots for a woman before.
“They call this sexual harassment,” she muttered.
“No, they don’t. They call it love, lust, desire, all sorts of words, but not sexual harassment.” He stared into her eyes and demanded, “What the hell have I done for you to give me the cold shoulder, Laura? And why did you run away tonight instead of talking about it?”
She tried to roll away from him, but kicked him on the shin by mistake.
He couldn’t hold back a gasp of pain.
“I’m sorry. Kit, please let me go.”
He clung on and repeated, “Not till you tell me what’s wrong.”
She could feel herself sag against him. “All right. But let me sit up.”
They righted themselves and she tutted as he winced. “Let me make you more comfortable.” She turned the pillow round to prop him up against the bedhead then did the same on her side.
He took hold of her hand. “Well, Laura?”
“I heard you that last morning your friends were here. You and Jules. In your bedroom, really early. You must have been there all night.”
“Ah. So that’s it.” He closed his eyes and shook her head slowly from side to side as the implications sank in. “You think I’m bed hopping. Thanks for the vote of confidence!”
She shrugged. “Men do it.”
“Your husband may have done; I don’t.” He caught her hand. “Look at me, Laura. Jules and I were not sleeping together. I woke up during the night and had trouble getting to sleep again. Too much coffee and stimulating chat, I think. She heard me moving around downstairs - she’s an insomniac from way back - and came down for a chat.”