A Cowboy to Keep

by Karen Rock

  So, what about Dani?

  The shapes of horses grew more distinct when he reached the bottom of the hill and neared the pasture. On the horizon, the sun swelled, chasing away the last, lingering stars.

  He needed to talk to Dani, though what he would say after “Thank you” wasn’t exactly clear.

  She’d lied to him. Betrayed him.

  Yet she hadn’t hesitated to jump into danger to help him. Her impulsive nature had put her at risk, just as it had when she’d driven her boyfriend from a bank heist.

  She’d done wrong, especially in keeping it hidden, but everyone made mistakes.

  Jesse had.

  He had.

  When his boots crunched on the gravel path, he slowed his gait until he stopped and leaned on the pasture’s fence. His gaze swept over the dozing horses and settled on Milly, who lurked in her usual spot in the back corner.

  His leaving would doom her to euthanasia. Regret gripped him. Despite his hard work, she wouldn’t take a saddle. Wanted no part of riding or much human contact, unable to overcome her past.

  Was he any different?

  Slowly, cautiously, she edged closer when she saw him, stopping and grazing every few steps, lifting her head as if to check if he still stood nearby, until, to his surprise, her head dropped over the side of the fence and butted his hand.

  He stroked her velvet nose. Felt the warm blow of her breath against his palm.

  “Hey, girl.”

  She bobbed her head and nickered when he patted her neck.

  Second chances. Milly deserved one. Just because she wasn’t rideable or sociable didn’t mean she didn’t have a right to a happy life.

  His brother had been damaged, too. Yet Jack had refused to see past those flaws, had stopped supporting his sibling, decided when enough was enough.

  He’d set a limit on his capacity to forgive, never realizing, until it was too late, that his heart would never quit his brother, no matter what his brain decided.

  “Jack!”

  He turned and spied Nan huffing his way, a walking stick in one hand, wildflowers clutched in the other. “Morning, Nan.” He lifted his hat and felt a smile come on, despite the twist of pain in his chest.

  Her sharp blue eyes studied him when she halted. “Quite a night.”

  “Yes.”

  “Poor Larry and Diane. They’re devastated.”

  He recalled the couple’s pale faces when he’d spoken to them at the sheriff’s office. “I’m sorry this happened. It must be a shock.”

  Her bouquet waved through the air as she gestured. “Ben’s always given them a hard time. Asking Smiley up here in the summers wasn’t just to help a troubled kid. They wanted Ben to have a friend, too. He never made them easily. Always acted a bit off.”

  A sheriff’s department SUV passed them, kicking up dust, part of the steady caravan that’d been carting off evidence all night.

  When the purr of the engine faded, he said, “The Mays are decent folks.”

  “Oh, they are.” Nan stroked Milly’s forelock and to his surprise the mare didn’t shy away. “Not perfect, of course. But who gets through a life without making any errors, right?”

  He blinked at her. Who, indeed? Not Dani, not his brother and not him. Did that make them unlovable? Not worthy?

  No, came the swift, certain answer. Something heavy and winged took off from his chest.

  He hadn’t faced his regret, his anger with himself, and had become a wanderer because of it, hunting for the vengeance he thought could absolve him.

  He’d judged himself as harshly as he’d assessed everyone in his life, his unwillingness to accept his mistakes, to learn from them, keeping him apart from others—not just his family, but Dani, too.

  Supporting someone, caring about them, even if they had the capacity to hurt you, wasn’t weakness. It took strength and conviction to stand by those who’d let you down. To believe that, together, you could make things right, and if not this time, the next...and the next after that...because that was what unconditional love meant.

  And he loved Dani.

  Unconditionally.

  She’d stuck by his side last night, despite everything, and he wanted to do the same for her...and Milly, he realized, an idea firing through him.

  He filled Nan in on his impromptu plan, and when he finished, she cocked her head and studied him.

  “You’re sure about this?”

  “Yup.”

  “All right. So I suppose you’ll be leaving us, then.” Nan gave Milly a final pat and turned. “Now that you’ve got your man.”

  He stared at her, dumbfounded.

  “Oh. You thought I didn’t know about your cover?” She made a clucking sound. “Like I said, no one notices the old lady reading in the corner. I overheard you and Dani talking a couple of times, as well as Larry and Diane, and began putting two and two together.”

  “You are a wonder, Nan.”

  She smiled back at him, humor peeking out of her queenly face. “No need to wonder. I’m just fabulous, is all... Least, that’s what my mother always told me. Not that her family felt the same way. They called me a mistake. Said I wasn’t good enough for them. Wanted Ma to give me up, but she wouldn’t. They were the ones that missed out, she said.”

  Jack wrapped an arm around her narrow shoulders. “Yes they did. You are fabulous.”

  Nan laid her head against his arm. “Well. Not always, I’ll admit. But life’s a hard enough journey without carrying around regrets.”

  He felt her nod and found himself agreeing. Your past, your background, couldn’t be carried like a yoke on your shoulders forever. At some point you needed to let it go. Start new.

  He had to make things right with Dani and not waste another minute. She had to know how much he cared. And how wrong he’d been.

  A few guests appeared on the road, heading for breakfast, the rise and fall of their conversations carrying in the morning air. Bella and Beau appeared, joyously barking.

  “Well, I’d better go.” Nan touched his arm, then stepped back. The dogs wagged their way to her, circling, sniffing, pushing their heads against her hands. “I’m in charge while the Mays and Dani are gone.”

  It took him a moment to register what she’d said. “Dani’s not here?” he asked, his pulse slamming through his veins.

  “She went to Oklahoma to turn herself in.”

  “What?”

  The corners of Nan’s mouth drooped. “She woke me around three this morning. Said she was headed to Oklahoma City because of some wild oats she’d sowed years ago. Sounded like a bunch of nonsense to me, but she was serious about it. Said she’d made up her mind and didn’t want to wait around till sunup in case she changed her mind. Anyway, she was worried Larry and Diane might not be back in time to run things this morning—which I’d better get to doing. Goodbye, Jack.”

  With a wave, she strolled away, the dogs hard on her heels, leaving him reeling, her information a chop to his windpipe, knocking the breath out of him, making his chest burn.

  Dani. He’d sent her from him just as he’d pushed his brother away.

  His jaw tightened as he strode to his truck and yanked open the door, tossing his hat on the passenger seat.

  But he’d be darned if he’d lose her, too.

  Her iridescent eyes glowed in his mind. He’d looked into them this week and seen her soul. Had glimpsed his, too, in their reflection, and what he’d saw was the man he wanted to be. Strong and certain, someone who could protect her, cherish her, bring her joy through sheer force of will.

  The engine revved and his tires crunched on gravel as he sped toward the front gate and the open road that’d lead him to Oklahoma City.

  To Dani.

  Could he reach her in time to sto
p her?

  * * *

  DANI RETURNED HER sister’s and Mr. Redmond’s waves, smiling through tears as their father’s pickup sped away, carrying her family back to Coltrane. They wanted to catch the tail end of Claire’s son Jonathan’s school band performance.

  She lowered her arm and blinked at the slanting, late afternoon sunlight.

  Free.

  Free to leave this state.

  Free to live her life.

  Free not just of the robbery charges, but of her guilt and the secret she’d hidden all this time. She should have done it years ago, but she’d caged herself with guilt and shame about her past, as surely as Kevin had been imprisoned for his own role. She’d carried the guilt over letting her family down, and she’d let herself down, too. Maybe she’d needed that time to repent her mistakes and bad decisions.

  She walked along a small path bordered with purple-headed rhododendrons and reached for her phone, eager to tell Jack. Then she remembered—she wasn’t free, after all.

  Not when Jack had shut her out of his heart.

  She pictured his betrayed expression when she’d confessed to him, how he hadn’t relented, even after she’d ridden to his aid in Spark Canyon. Clearly, unlike the Oklahoma legal system that’d dismissed charges after hearing Mr. Redmond’s arguments, her story and a corroborating statement from Kevin, he couldn’t forgive her past sins.

  Her legs wobbled from the exhaustion of the last twenty-four hours. She ducked beneath a massive weeping willow tree and dropped down to the pretty white bench beneath it, jittery and light-headed. Yellow-green strands lifted and swung in the breeze as she sat beneath an umbrella of trembling, sunlit leaves.

  She stared at the glimpses of spectacular blue sky that appeared between the thick drapes of leaves. Hopefully Jack was gazing up at it, too, finally finding peace over what’d happened to his brother.

  Despite everything, she only wanted his happiness.

  No matter where she looked inside herself, she came across more love for him, for everything about him, his anger as well as his tenderness. He’d been hurt and let down because he’d cared—because she’d mattered to him.

  And she’d ruined everything.

  A groan rose in her throat and she covered her face with her hands. She had a second chance at a future, but without Jack, it stretched ahead as bleak and lonely as her past.

  “Dani!”

  Her shoulders shook at the remembered sound of his voice, so clear she almost believed she hadn’t conjured it.

  “Dani,” she heard again, and then strong hands gripped hers and lowered them.

  Jack.

  He was down on one knee in front of her, his thick-lashed brown eyes searching hers, and she thought she might fall like a tree at his tender, concerned expression.

  This had to be a dream.

  She met his gaze head-on. It was impossible to look away and he couldn’t seem to, either. Time slowed and she could hear the blood rumbling through her body, drumming in her ears.

  “Jack?” She touched his face, his scar, needing to know he was real. “What are you doing here?”

  He pressed her hand to his cheek, his eyes intent, full of the same ache she felt. “I came to stop you. The clerk told me you’d just left, and when I spotted a car with a Mountain Sky bumper sticker, I scouted the park.”

  “Why?” Confusion and surprise pounded in her heart.

  “Because I’m sorry.”

  A skyful of hope knocked into her. “I—” she started, but he shook his head and sat beside her, his thumb now skimming her knuckles, releasing a flock of butterflies in her belly.

  “Please. Let me say this first,” he said, his voice thick with emotion.

  At her nod, he breathed deep, exhaled and began. “Judging you was wrong. Hypocritical. Shortsighted and insensitive. And then, when you put your life at risk to help me, I didn’t even thank you. Nan told me no one lives a life without errors, and I realized that the biggest one I could make was letting you go.”

  He tucked her hair behind one ear before continuing, his direct gaze seeming to reach down deep. “Thank you. Not just for last night, but for every minute of every day of this past week when you brought this broken man the real redemption he needed, though he was too pigheaded to see it.”

  The rich, low timbre of his voice moved right through her, settled in her heart, broke it open and healed it a split second later.

  “You gave me that, too,” she said, her voice cracking. “Even if you’d caught me in time, I still would have turned myself in. You were right to make me see that I needed to face my mistakes and take responsibility. I never would have been free of them until I had, and if not for you, I wouldn’t have done it.”

  He gathered her close, his large arms engulfing her. “Will you forgive me?”

  “If you forgive me.”

  He pulled back slightly, placed a finger beneath her chin and tipped it so that their mouths were a breath apart. This close, she could make out the beginning of stubble on his cheeks, see the shadows under his eyes, and understood, more than words could say, how much she meant to him. Knew, down deep in her bones, how much she loved him.

  “No one’s like you for me.” He peered into her eyes in a way that made her tremble. “I’m in love with you.”

  “I love you, too,” she breathed as their lips met.

  He kissed her, and at last everything was as it should be. Her body melted against his with exquisite relief. It was like sinking into a hot bath after being caught in the rain, like sliding under crisp cotton sheets after an exhausting day.

  He kissed her, slowly, tenderly, his mouth slanting against hers, his fingers tunneling through her hair then stroking her back, until her insides turned molten, her body languid in his arms. She traced his face, resting her fingers briefly on its marks, then wound them through his soft, dark hair. Her body caught fire at his hungry growl and she fitted herself into the contours of his body, wishing she could fall all the way into him. She wanted to be that close, to share his heartbeat, his breath.

  And then he kissed her with a ferocity that incapacitated her. He was electric, pulsing with energy, greedy for her and alive. His body moving restlessly, jumbling her thoughts, quickening her breath.

  “I love you,” he murmured after a moment into her ears, her neck, her hair, and each time he did she said, “Me, too,” and then they were kissing again and she couldn’t believe there was anything in this world that could feel this right and real and true.

  Later, when his lips whispered off hers, he cradled her close and it seemed as though a growing circle of light surrounded them. She traced his arm tattoo, proof of his dedication, his courage, the loyalty that’d compelled him to avenge his brother...that’d driven him straight to her.

  She sent a silent prayer of thanks to Jesse, to her mother, to Jack’s father, the silent witnesses to this incredible moment.

  “Now that you have your freedom, will you consider spending some of it with me?” he asked, holding her gaze. It was entirely possible she was going to faint, she thought. Or burst into flames.

  “Of course, starting with your family reunion...” Now that she’d faced her painful past, she wanted to help him do the same.

  He lazily brushed his hand across her neck and down her back. She felt like a tuning fork, her whole body humming. “Good. I thought Milly would have to be my plus one.”

  She blinked at him. “What do you mean?”

  “I spoke to Larry on the way out here. When I offered to buy her, he gifted her to me, instead. As thanks. She’s going to live her life at my ranch where she can graze all day and only be ridden if she wants to.”

  She melted at the generosity of this hard-bitten man with the soft core she adored. “Jack. That’s exactly what she needed.”

&
nbsp; “And you’re what I need. So, first my family reunion and then your sister’s wedding...”

  She laughed, amazed. “I can’t believe you remember that.”

  “Everything about you is branded.” He tapped his chest. “Right here.” His lips fell on her cheeks. “Your freckles.” He kissed her there. “Your eyes.” He pressed his mouth to each lid. “This mouth...” And then they were lost in each other until he pulled back, angled his head and gazed down at her. “I could never forget a thing about you,” he finished, the sincerity in his voice, his gaze, knocking the breath out of her.

  “I never want you to.”

  “So, then...a life sentence?” At the warm humor in his voice, she smiled. She’d see his corny and raise it with cheesy.

  “Oh...so you want me to be your ball and chain?”

  He placed a hand over his heart and a giggle bubbled out of her at his exaggerated expression. “You know me. Always a hopeless romantic.”

  “Ha. Good one.” She biffed his arm. “Guess you’ll have a lifetime to prove it.”

  His eyes twinkled down at her, his quirked mouth full of mischief. “So you’ll surrender yourself to me?”

  “Don’t get ahead of yourself, bounty hunter. Let’s just say, as long as we’re doing time with each other, let’s give ourselves the maximum sentence. Forever.”

  “Good, because I’m never letting you go,” he murmured, then he cupped her face and captured her lips with his, kissing her like it was the end of the world.

  Or the start of their new one.

  * * * * *

  Keep reading for an excerpt from THE HUSBAND SHE CAN’T FORGET by Patricia Forsythe.

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