Mainlander

by Will Smith

  ‘I couldn’t give a shit about your chop. Tell me about the woman!’

  ‘Your language!’

  ‘The fucking woman!’

  ‘Not even the Nazis spoke to me like that!’

  ‘That’s not what I’ve heard. My aunt said you were a Jerry Bag.’

  ‘I don’t know, she was maybe thirty, shoulder-length hair, light brown, shorter than yours,’ sobbed Mrs Le Boutillier. ‘Now please leave.’

  Debbie. Of course. Who else could it have been? Emma looked down at the frightened old lady and felt ashamed. She walked through to the kitchen, turned off some overboiled leeks and took the pork chop out of the oven. Then she tore off a length of kitchen roll, went back to the lounge and handed it to her snivelling neighbour.

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  Emma fled back to her flat. Her own tears were flowing now and she scrabbled in her bag for a handkerchief. She pulled out the letter for Colin, which goaded him to run into Debbie’s arms. But that wasn’t what she wanted. He had found her at her lowest point. She’d been sinking down and he had raised her up again, her rock on the Rock. He was hers, not Debbie’s, not his mother’s, not anyone else’s. She crumpled the letter and wept silently on the sofa.

  16

  LOUISE

  Friday, 16 October 1987

  ‘What’s the matter, Lou? Not got a kiss for me?’

  Louise had frozen at the sight of Billy when she opened the door. Needing to mask the fear and panic, she broke into a beaming smile and wrapped her arms around him, kissing him with as much passion as she could muster. His breath stank but, then, Billy had once boasted that the only use he’d ever found for a toothbrush was as a shiv, with a razor blade stuck to the head.

  ‘You’re shakin’, girl.’

  ‘I just can’t believe you’re here – it feels like a dream. Come in, quick.’ She pulled him inside and shut the door. She kissed him again, but he pushed her aside to walk further into the room. She knew he was checking for signs of another man. She’d not answered his question about Danny, and she quivered at the knowledge that eventually she would have to.

  He turned round and stood with his arms folded, while she remained in front of the door. Best place to be, she figured, although she knew he was quicker than her. He was spindly and narrow-hipped, but that didn’t preclude strength. Besides, as he had often demonstrated, it wasn’t how strong you were, it was what you were prepared to do, and there was no move too low for Billy in a fight. He certainly didn’t recognise the ‘never hit a woman’ rule, which, to her shame, she’d enjoyed when a former school-friend had sneered at her in a club.

  ‘Not got nothin’ to say? Been a long time, girl. Didn’t come all this way to be stared at.’

  ‘Sorry. I guess I’m just in shock. Good shock, happy shock.’

  ‘Sound like you lost your accent.’

  ‘When’d you get out? How’d you get out?’ she said, trying to restore it.

  ‘Couple of weeks ago. Good behaviour. Turns out slashin’ a nonce is good behaviour.’ He gave a rasping laugh. ‘Screws put me up to it, looked the other way, then returned the favour.’ He wandered over to the window and peered round the corner of the curtain sheet. ‘You took a bit of findin’, not in the phone book.’

  ‘I don’t have a phone.’

  ‘So what you been doin’, apart from not comin’ to see me?’ He was prowling round the room now. She’d forgotten the way he edged from foot to foot, like an animal trying to puff itself up to deter a predator or intimidate a prey.

  She took a step towards him, hands clasped in penance. ‘I’m sorry, Bill, I just couldn’t cope with seeing you inside, caged up.’

  ‘Worst place to put me, a cage. Nowhere for the other people to run. What’s with the briefcase?’

  ‘It’s for work. I’ve got a crappy office job.’ She pulled him down on to the bed, putting the case under it with one hand while stroking his face with the other. ‘I can’t believe you’re here, that you’re real.’ She kissed him again, wanting to distract him with sex, but terrified that she wouldn’t be sufficiently aroused, and that he would know something was up.

  ‘Shit job, poky bedsit, but a nice posh briefcase. What’s that about?’

  She was worried her voice would start to quaver. ‘This place is all about image, got to look the part.’

  ‘Looked heavy when you lugged it back.’

  ‘You been spying on me?’ She smiled to convert her tone from accusatory to flirtatious.

  ‘Not laid eyes on you for a while, wanted to check if you’d lost your looks.’

  ‘So, what do you think?’ She stood and gave him a twirl, a wink and a curtsy, resenting how small he was making her feel.

  ‘I’m here, aren’t I? Otherwise I’d have just driven off.’

  ‘You brought a car?’

  ‘Picked one up.’

  ‘Bill, you got to be careful over here. People notice things like that, cars going missing. Is it flash?’

  ‘Yeah, but that’s not gonna make it stand out. You didn’t clock it across the road. Missin’ Merc? Every other car’s a Merc.’

  ‘The cops will be looking …’

  ‘Cops? You really have forgot how to speak.’

  ‘Bizzies, then.’

  ‘The bizzies here are fuckin’ yokels.’

  The one who’d come to see her wasn’t. He was smart.

  ‘What’s your plan?’ she asked, praying to hear Thought I’d scoot round the Elizabethan fortifications, maybe check out the zoo, then head home and let you get on with your life, but knowing that a very dark net was drawing around her.

  ‘Just wanted to check in with my girl and bring her back where she belongs. But while I was trackin’ you down, I saw a lot of opportunities. There’s a bit of dope here, but it’s run by pussies. And I don’t think the bizzies’d know the difference between brown and fuckin’ Marmite.’

  ‘Isn’t your supply, you know, restricted?’

  ‘What d’you mean?’

  ‘Big Gaz took your patch and your dealers.’

  ‘You think I don’t know that?’ He sat up, gripping her wrists. ‘I fuckin’ gave ’em to him, in return for his boys watchin’ over me inside.’

  She sank down to her knees, brought his hands up to her mouth and kissed them. ‘You don’t need watching over – I’ve seen what these hands can do. And they can take back whatever they want from Gary Hutchinson.’

  ‘Gaz’s fuckin’ small-time. Two square miles, that’s his empire. He can have it. There’s a whole fuckin’ world out here.’ He let go of her wrists and stood over her, his eyes glittering. ‘Made some nice new friends inside. Some Turkish fellas with big connections. They’re sittin’ on Skag Mountain. I just need a sea route from Marsay, it’s a Froggie town. Plenty of boats here and no one watchin’.’

  ‘Why not just sail it straight back home? Stick it in one of the containers.’ Please, Billy, don’t come and infect my paradise.

  ‘Big fat Customs hands to grease. Nobody bothers here. Fancy yachts in and out. Plus I’ve been sittin’ in bars, listenin’. I hear a lot of Scousers, Mancs, Jocks and Micks. They’re back and forth on domestic flights. Split it up from here, small-scale distribution on a route the bizzies think is too poxy to check up on.’

  ‘Big plan.’

  ‘Yeah, just need some start-up funds. About fifty to buy in on a small supply, and with the profits from that I can go back for a larger chunk. Builds and builds. Be enough to get me off the streets and maybe into one of those houses on the beach. Imagine that. Not a beach hut, a fuckin’ house on the beach!’

  ‘Where you going to get the fifty grand, though?’

  Billy smiled and sat down on the floor, sliding the case out from under the bed. ‘You tell me.’

  Louise swallowed hard, to counter the sensation that she was about to throw up. She moved closer. ‘I’ve been a busy girl,’ she purred, nuzzling his hair so that it wiped away the tears she couldn’t hold back, ‘getting ready
for you.’

  ‘How was runnin’ over here gettin’ ready for me?’

  Her mouth was dry. This was never an issue that was going to be resolved quickly. ‘With you away, Bill, I had no one to protect me. Mickey Delaney was eyeing me up, the McCallister brothers threatened to cut me so you wouldn’t want me. It wasn’t safe.’

  ‘You sayin’ I couldn’t protect you, that I don’t have no reach?’

  ‘I didn’t know you had Gaz’s backing. I thought he was another one to watch out for.’

  ‘Fuck Gaz. Him and the rest of those cunts would piss their pants at the thought of me givin’ ’em a smile.’

  ‘It’s not about you being weak, love. It’s about me being scared and panicking, and being wrong. But maybe this will make up for it.’ She opened the case. He leapt on to the bed in delight.

  ‘Fuck me, Lou, how much is this?’

  There was no point in being anything other than direct. ‘Ten.’

  ‘How’d you get it?’

  Further honesty suddenly seemed incredibly dangerous: it would involve confessing to sleeping with another man. Danny would buckle under such a revelation; Billy might throw her out of a window. But she was pausing for too long and her usually agile mind was so paralysed by his venomous leer that she found herself saying, ‘Honey-trap. Local businessman bored of his wife but not enough to want a divorce.’

  He gripped her head with both hands and leant over her till they were nose to nose. She felt sick and chilled. She thought of screaming, but who would come? No one who could stop what was about to happen.

  ‘Ten grand for my girl’s pussy. Seems cheap to me.’

  She smiled as strongly as she could. ‘I did it for you.’

  ‘And I say you’re worth more. What’s he do, this guy?’

  ‘Owns a hotel. Flash one.’

  ‘Is he a madhead?’

  ‘Course not. But don’t fight him, Bill.’

  ‘I’ll only fight him if he won’t open his wallet.’

  ‘He won’t pay any more.’

  ‘I need fifty, not ten.’

  ‘Maybe I can pull the scam again.’

  ‘What am I, your fuckin’ pimp? I’m pissed off you whored yourself out once. I don’t want it happenin’ again. You fuck anyone else while I was away?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘Don’t lie, Lou. You and me, we was always honest with each other.’ That was bullshit. Louise knew for a fact he’d slept with her cousin.

  ‘No one to worry about.’

  ‘What about this Danny?’

  ‘He’s just a friend.’

  ‘Rich? Worth a squeeze?’

  ‘He’s a chef.’

  ‘Let’s meet your hotel owner, then.’ Billy stood up and clapped his hands.

  Louise reached up and held his waist. It was worth a try. ‘Wait, Bill,’ she said. ‘Just hear me out. There’s another way.’

  He looked down at her and spread his arms wide. ‘Another way what?’

  ‘To get your house on the beach. With this money here, we could buy a place now.’

  ‘Serious? That’s enough for a mansion? Which estate agents you been talkin’ to?’

  ‘Well, not quite a mansion. But there’s this property up in Rozel. It’s this sweet little bay, Bill, not like the coast back home. Blue sea, pink rocks. It’s beautiful.’

  ‘I’m confused, ’cause you said this cash was for me. Sounds like you been lookin’ for a place for yourself.’

  ‘For us, love. While I was waiting, I got thinking. This could be our way out. You and me in a big old place on the beach. More than Gaz has got, or any of the big guys back home.’

  ‘You and me? Homemakers? I need fuckin’ stuff to do, Lou. I need challenges. I’m not gonna sit around watchin’ you knit.’

  ‘This place would give us stuff to do. It needs doing up, and it’s a bed-and-breakfast, but we can turn it into a nice little hotel. Open the doors to the tourists six months a year, sit on our arses the rest of it.’

  Billy’s jaw dropped. Then he grinned. ‘A hotel. It’s the answer to everythin’.’

  ‘Really?’ Louise was flushed with relief and excitement.

  ‘Sure. I want nothin’ more than to spend the rest of my life washin’ sheets and cookin’ breakfasts and cleanin’ shit stains off toilets. What the fuck you talkin’ ’bout?’

  ‘I’m just scared about you going back inside. I want you to play safe. Don’t hate me for wanting you,’ she murmured, in a frantic bid to avoid a slapping.

  ‘Is it that, or you want to save this prick a beatin’?’

  ‘No, I don’t care about him.’

  ‘’Cause I’m gettin’ the urge. You know how I get. Need to get me rocks off. Someone’s gonna fuckin’ get it tonight, Lou. I reckon there’s three candidates. I’m still sore you didn’t visit, you can understand that, plus there’s ten grand there you wanna piss away on a fuckin’ B-and-B, rather than lettin’ me expand me business with it. So you are a prime fuckin’ candidate. So far, I’ve been fuckin’ soft. Remember what Degsy did to his old lady when he got out and found she’d been foolin’ around?’

  Louise nodded, eyes down, praying for all the world that Barney Vautier would walk back in.

  ‘Number two is this guy who paid under the goin’ rate for a night in your hole. Even if he pays, he’s gonna have to take at least one punch to the face for fuckin’ me woman. And you know what I’m like when me blood’s up. I can’t stop meself. But we can forget your shitty hotel, we can forget his big flash one, and we can just wait here for option number three. Your friend Danny. You seemed to be expectin’ him and I’d love to meet him. What do you say, Lou? Who deserves it most, out the three of you?’

  ‘I’ll take you to Rob.’

  ‘Rob, is it? Crackin’! Let’s rob Rob!’

  17

  COLIN

  Friday, 16 October 1987

  ‘Are you sure you know where it is?’ Colin yelled in Debbie’s face.

  She jabbed a finger out into the night. She might have said something back – he couldn’t tell because of the noise of the wind that belted them as they walked through the rocky gully, and also because Debbie had drawn the string on her hood so tight against the rain that her mouth was obscured. She pulled his arm to get him moving again and they staggered on, heads down, beams from their torches picking out glistening black rocks, sand and dark tidal pools that they often had to wade through. Colin’s trousers were sopping, his toes numb in his boots, every atom of his overcautious body telling him that each step was not only futile but potentially dangerous. He looked back: he could no longer see the lights of the Island. He prayed that Debbie’s insistence that she knew a safe path out to Seymour Tower was folly, and that she was leading them round in a circle, back to the car park. They’d passed a few hours there, listening to the radio and eating chips while waiting for the tide to allow them access to the tower a mile out to sea.

  His enthusiasm for the search had waned throughout the day as they had traipsed round various fortifications, starting with those on land. L’Etacquerel Fort on the north coast had been unlikely. It was reached via a wooden bridge across a dry moat off a steep coastal path, which didn’t guarantee the total seclusion for which they assumed Duncan had opted. La Tour de Vinde, a circular structure at the base of Noirmont Point, was also a long shot, given that there was no access or platform around the base to use as partial shelter, but it passed the time until they could walk out first to Portelet Tower in the next bay, which they reached via a small sandbank, and then La Rocco Tower, in the southern curve of the vast sweep of St Ouen’s Bay. With no sign of Duncan, they had headed to St Aubin’s Fort, built on a small reef, and again left empty-handed.

  He felt relaxed with Debbie. The air had been cleared, so he attached no significance to the occasional hand clasp used to steady each other walking over rocks or across fissures. At first conversation was minimal and practical, then became more expansive. He learnt that she had taught English
in Japan before training as a history teacher, which she insisted she had told him before. At the sight of rabbits lolloping round the Noirmont grass he had confessed that, such was his childhood obsession with Watership Down, his mother had taken him on a pilgrimage to the very Down.

  Debbie had laughed long and hard. ‘Oh, my God, that’s kind of sweet, but so uncool.’

  He had been mildly taken aback: she normally treated him with more deference. He supposed that now the boundaries of the friendship had been clearly delineated, she felt she could mock him. She had no need to flatter him since what she wanted he couldn’t provide. He decided it was healthier, although when he had warned her away from the edge of the cliffs above Portelet Bay, her response had had a confusing tinge of flirtation.

  ‘Are you worried I’m going to fling myself off because we can’t be together?’ It had come with a smile rather than rancour, which made him overlook her insensitivity in referring to a suicide leap, given his fears for Duncan.

  The easy company they made with each other, now that they each knew where they stood, meant that they had prolonged the comfort of the car for as long as possible before setting out for the tower. Also, as the tide had gone down with the sun, so the wind had come up with the rain. Even as they set off, he had tried to dissuade her from another fruitless trek, especially after she’d told him the incoming tide rose eight centimetres a minute.

  ‘We don’t have time to debate it, Colin. At this rate we have a half-hour window to get him off. If you don’t want to be out here in this weather, how can you leave him out in it?’

  ‘We don’t even know he’s there.’

  ‘I told you, I saw something.’

  Earlier they’d driven along to Gorey Harbour to buy some binoculars from an outdoors shop. Colin had hoped a close scan of the tower would rule out having to walk to it, but Debbie had sworn she’d seen something flapping above the walls at its base. Colin had been unable to make out anything in the grey, and posited that it could be a fishing net, flag or coat.