Were All Animals

by Mima

  Deciding that she was insane, he thought maybe this was the best way to get out of a bizarre situation. “Maybe.” He lied and for a moment felt something stir inside of him at the possibility. “There’s no future for us, Audrey. I tried to tell you that before and I’ve avoided your calls and texts because I don’t think you get it. I made a mistake at the party; a big mistake. Nothing should’ve happened between us.”

  “Well, it did and now I’m pregnant.” Her hand moved over her belly as if to indicate the product of their affair. “And your mother seems to think that you will do the right thing.”

  The mention of his mother was like a sharp knife in his heart, reminding him that his parents had fallen for this insane act. They believed Audrey was pregnant with his child and he knew they would insist that he take on his responsibilities, without doubting that she was telling the truth.

  His mother didn’t believe in ‘giving yourself’ to just anyone and lectured both her children on the meaning of having an intimate relationship with another person. It wasn’t about lust, something that Chase struggled with when he was quite young, when his mother insisted that you only give into your desires when you are with someone you love and plan to spend your life with — she clearly didn’t know he had sex with Lucy and now that she knew about Audrey, she would insist that he owed her the respect of making her an honest woman.

  “Your mother and I had a long talk about relationships and how society is very casual about something as special as making love. I think she believes that we never would’ve had that kind of experience together if I didn’t mean something to you,” Audrey quipped, clearly not believing her own words. “I told her it was my first time and that it was special. I regretted that I didn’t wait until we were seeing one another longer, but obviously, God meant for me to have this baby now.”

  Shaking his head, Chase bubbled up in laughter. There was absolutely no way she was virgin, that she shared his mother’s beliefs or that she wished to have waited.

  She continued to ramble, but he didn’t hear a word. His mind was a million miles away, searching for an escape route, unable to handle what was taking place. Audrey must’ve sensed she wasn’t getting anywhere because she announced it was time to leave. He was instructed to answer her calls and that she would give him further reports on her doctor appointments. Stunned, Chase didn’t respond as she walked out the door, but merely let out a sigh of relief.

  Reaching for his phone, he found three texts from Maggie. All indicated that she was concerned and asked him to get back to her. Glancing at the clock, he figured she was probably at work and considered going to see her; but it was across town and his dad had the truck. Instead, he texted her and quickly summed up what happened.

  That’s messed up, Chase. Is she crazy?

  He grinned and replied.

  Obviously.

  There wasn’t much else he could say. Horrified by Audrey’s bold words, he felt a mixture of anger and misery, his body heavy as he walked upstairs and into his room. Throwing himself on the bed, a sense of panic filled him and he briefly considered running away.

  Eventually, his sister would drop by his room, but she seemed uninterested in his story and merely shrugged. Any compassion she had expressed earlier that day had quickly evaporated. “You made the choice to fuck her without a condom. Live with the consequences.”

  His father was just as apathetic when he arrived home. He said nothing when Chase asked to borrow the truck, silently passing his son the keys before going into the living room.

  Chase wasted no time getting outside and jumping in the driver’s seat. He had to talk to someone who cared. He had to talk to Maggie.

  The convenience store was quiet that night. In fact, the entire mini-mall embraced a silent parking lot with only a few cars close to the family restaurant in the middle. The enticing aroma reminded Chase that he hadn’t eaten since earlier that day, but his stomach was tied in too many knots to even consider the possibility.

  Maggie appeared surprised to see him when he entered the store. She was reading a magazine and quickly sat it aside and stood up straighter. Unlike that afternoon, she was now wearing a fitted, pale blue blouse that matched her eyes. Her jeans were loose, but conservative in nature, displaying a professional image. She looked cute.

  “Chase, are you okay?”

  Shaking his head, he opened his mouth but no words came out. He wasn’t sure what he was anymore.

  Rushing around the counter, she pulled him into a tight hug that only managed to spark his desires, which were raw and vulnerable. There was nothing he wanted more than to be with her at that moment; perhaps as a distraction or in comfort, as his heart began to race and his breath grew labored. He pulled her in closer and he could’ve sworn he sensed the same physical reaction in her body, but then she let him go.

  “I have a customer,” She whispered and rushed back behind the counter.

  Feeling awkward, uncomfortable sensations, he disappeared into an aisle that held various cards, celebrating everything from weddings to birthdays and, of course, baby cards. There were tons; some for baby showers, welcoming a new baby, baby’s first birthday, baptismal cards. Suddenly feeling depressed, he picked one up with an illustration of a baby in a bassinet, with two doves flying over it, pulling the child through the air.

  Putting it back, he heard the bell over the door ring and he glanced over to see the customer leaving with a pack of cigarettes in hand. His eyes made eye contact with Maggie’s and he suddenly realized that the lust he felt for her was probably not going to be reciprocated. Not that it would change anything if it was, but it would definitely take the edge off.

  Maggie approached him, her eyes glancing at the cards in front of him. “You know, even if it’s true, you don’t have to be with her, you know that right?”

  “I know,” he sighed. “But I’m still going to be connected with her forever.”

  She didn’t say anything but gave a sympathetic smile.

  Feeling restless, he didn’t stay much longer. His brain shot in 100 different directions and no amount of talking would help his anxieties. Chase decided to go home. He had to bite the bullet eventually.

  His arrival home filled him with apprehension as he pulled into the driveway and saw his mother’s car, wishing that his life would end at that moment, so he wouldn’t have to face her.

  Louise Jacobs sat at the kitchen table in the same chair as Audrey had earlier that day, drinking a cup of tea. Her dark eyes looked tired, weakened from the many dark hours of her life, but she remained silent as her son joined her at the table. He had so much to say and Chase thoroughly believed in being completely honest about everything. He felt a sense of relief when she rose from the chair and approached him, knowing that nothing would bring him more comfort at that moment than her embrace.

  It happened fast. The sting of a slap had never felt sharper. It wasn’t the first time she had hit him but on this occasion, he felt tears fill his eyes, simply by the shame and disgust that he saw in her eyes. Anger curled her upper lip and her eyes were red, pained and haunting. Louise Jacob’s words were abrupt, to the point.

  “You will marry this girl. Your careless actions and stupidity will not bring shame to my family.”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Raindrops pounded against the Corolla’s windshield with such intensity that it was almost impossible to see the road on that dreary night. The sky was pitch black and a heaviness seemed to surround Chase, as he sat in silence on the passenger side of the older model car. Maggie would occasionally glance in his direction but he was so distracted that she could’ve been naked and he wouldn’t have noticed.

  The weeks since Audrey announced her pregnancy had felt like a mourning period for Chase, while almost everyone else seemed to move forward. His mother, now convinced that he would marry Audrey, was elated that she would soon be a grandmother, while his fa
ther showed about as much enthusiasm as he ever did for family matters; which wasn’t much. Angel, on the other hand, appeared indifferent and barely spoke to Chase since learning that she would be an aunt. If the topic was even brought up in her presence, she would roll her eyes and exit the room. Chase envied her and wish he could do the same.

  It was now close to the end of the August and everything was falling apart. Rather than having an exciting summer, planning for the future, preparing to move away and start a new life, he was now saddled down to Hennessey for the rest of his life, with a family he didn’t want.

  One mistake. One fucking mistake and this is my life.

  Of course, Maggie had heard it all before, again and again, throughout the weeks following the announcement. She tried her best to offer words of wisdom, but Chase could tell that she no longer knew what to say. There were no easy solutions. It wasn’t as if his worst mistake that summer had been to put a dent in his dad’s truck or get in a drunken brawl; those options looked pretty good in comparison to what he was faced with now.

  Where he was miserable and dreading his future, Audrey was excitedly making wedding plans with his mother. Chase couldn’t remember agreeing to marry her and yet, it had already been decided that it was the ‘right’ thing to do, therefore the women in his life appeared to aggressively take over his future. His mom liked Audrey. She thought she was sweet, kind and smart. How many times had she mentioned how Chase’s ‘new girlfriend’ had completed two years of college and was currently working a casual position at a youth center in Mento, helping troubled teens.

  Ironically, Chase felt like a teen in trouble; although apparently, not the right kind.

  Chase briefly met Audrey’s grandmother, the woman she lived with since finishing college. On top of all her other saintly attributes that impressed Louise Jacobs about Chases’ new ‘girlfriend’ was the fact that she looked after the elderly woman in Mento, while also checking in on her great grandmother in Hennessey on a daily basis. The woman was like 300 years old and upon hearing her great granddaughter’s ‘wonderful’ news, decided it was time to move into a senior’s complex and leave Audrey the house.

  His entire life had been mapped out, while Audrey’s belly looked the same as it had the one night he had sex with her, showing no signs of pregnancy. He felt as though he was in the middle of a hellish nightmare, even worse than the kind where you weren’t able to swiftly run away from the person chasing you; then again, it was apparent that the person chasing him already had Chase in her clutches.

  The rain continued to frantically cling to the window and Chase was about to suggest that they get off the road, when he noticed Maggie doing exactly what he was thinking. The two of them were always so in tune, almost as if she were reading his mind and the only person in his life that gave him an ounce of sanity since this madness had begun. All his friends from high school - not that there were many - had all fucked off to work in high-paying jobs in the oil industry. Meanwhile, he was stuck in Hennessey, working at the local gym. At least he liked his job, the small fragment of his life that gave him confidence.

  “It should let up in a few minutes,” Maggie turned on her signal light and slid the Toyota into park mode. Taking a deep breath, she turned in his direction and silently stared at him. Her eyes seemed to examine every inch of his face; something that would’ve aroused his senses weeks earlier, now he was so preoccupied with his troubles and long had accepted that his new best friend was a lesbian. Not that he didn’t still have fantasies from time to time.

  Rubbing his forehead and running his hands over his buzzed haircut - an impromptu decision a few days earlier after Audrey suggested he grow it long - he took a deep breath and shrugged. “I got nowhere I have to be.”

  “I’m sure you would rather be somewhere other than the side of the road in a rain storm,” Maggie gently suggested and let out a quick laugh. “Especially after a long day in a hot gym.”

  The air conditioning had broken down at the worst possible time, causing many clients to rightfully complain, while Chase was stuck in a muggy environment, the repulsive smell of sweat surrounding him all day, something he would eventually become immune to as he prayed for his day to go fast.

  “It wasn’t so bad, I guess,” Chase considered as he stared forward and watched as another car turned off the road on the opposing side of the street. The two were on the main highway that was connected to all the small towns; the highway that could’ve taken Chase to a major city and away from his current hell. Other than the mini mall and Hennessey’s downtown area, such as it was, there were only a few other scattered businesses including the gym Chase worked for, which was off on its own, away from everything else.

  “Good thing you like your job,” Maggie commented as she flickered on the wipers and the rain started to ease. She bit her lips, something he noticed she did when nervous or anxious. He knew he made her feel this way because she was looking for a way to solve his problems, but that was impossible. They weren’t solvable unless he ran away.

  He didn’t reply. She was right, he loved working at the gym. His boss, Harold, was an awesome guy, who taught him a great deal about fitness, nutrition and the proper way to use the equipment. They recently added a heavy bag to the gym and Chase immediately announced he wanted to learn mixed martial arts. Harold had merely shook his head and corrected him. “First things first, you got to learn basic boxing techniques, there’s a long road before you’ll be anywhere close to being a mixed martial arts fighter.”

  Chase had this wonderful opportunity to learn from someone who had a vast amount of experience in professional fighting, now retired, he had returned ‘home’ to look after his ailing parents and decided to open a gym in the area. In the beginning, it was swarmed with local women, who had heard Harold was single. Many still came in and asked for him, but the gym owner was rarely at his workplace, having started another gym an hour out of town, he was frequently traveling between the two. Chase was often the only person working at this location, occasionally with a supervisor.

  “It’s an awesome job.” Chase agreed and felt some relief from his usual, unhappy state. A smile perked up his lips, if only temporarily and Maggie looked pleased.

  “You’re really getting so buff!” Her eyes skimmed over his chest, covered by a tight, blue t-shirt he had changed into after a quick shower at the end of his shift. “I’m impressed. Maybe I should join the gym.”

  “I’m surprised you haven’t,” Chase suddenly felt in his element, sitting up a little taller in his seat. “I mean, if you want to get into the RCMP, you’ve got to be in really great shape, right? I know you run…”

  “I do, but you’re right, I have to increase my upper body strength too,” Maggie said, her fingers running over the steering wheel, her eyes glancing toward the car parked opposite them, as it eased back onto the road. The rain had almost completely stopped. “I’m just waiting till I have more money saved.”

  “I can get you a deal,” Chase offered, excited about the possibility of training his closest friend. “That’s no problem. Maybe Harold will let you in for a few free sessions, to see how you like it.”

  “That would be awesome,” Maggie said, her smile soft and genuine. “I’ve never been to the gym before, so you might have your work cut out for you.”

  “Don’t worry about that,” Chase shook his head. “Trust me, if you saw some of the people who come through the doors at work, you would know I’ve already got my work cut out for me.”

  “I bet,” Maggie let out a short laugh and signaled to return to the street and Chase felt disappointment slide in, at the realization that he would soon be home and back to his bleak reality. “Can I go in sometimes next week? Maybe a day you aren’t as busy.”

  “Tuesdays are quiet, in the afternoon,” Chase suggested as they continued down the road. “Drop in then.”

  “I will,” Maggie replied as they turn
ed onto his road and then, into the driveway of his house.

  “Want to come in?” Chase asked but already knew the answer. Maggie was uncomfortable in his house. The last time she popped in to hang out with Chase, casual and relaxed, she left feeling awkward under Louise Jacobs’ eyes. It was clear his mother felt it was inappropriate that the two hang out now that her son was ‘engaged’ to Audrey. In fact, Maggie was barely out the door when his mother had made a comment to that effect.

  “What difference does it make?” Chase snapped, anger crawling through his body when he considered how little of his own life felt like his choice anymore, but rather predestined by those around him. “She’s just my friend.”

  “It doesn’t look right to be engaged and spending all your time with another woman.” His mother replied as she fluttered around the kitchen. Her face was weathered, old, no longer the beautiful Native Canadian woman of her youth, she now looked like someone who had graciously let herself go and never looked back. “You two look closer than you and Audrey.”

  “That’s cause we are,” He spoke honestly. “Maggie is my best friend.”

  “Audrey should be your best friend.”

  “Well, she’s not.” Chase heard himself snap, something he had never done toward his mother until Audrey made an appearance in his life. Now, it was commonplace. “I don’t even want her in my life.”

  “How dare you say that?” His mother retorted as her dark eyes shot in his direction and he stepped back as if he expected her to slap him.

  “Because it’s true.” His reply was curt and their conversation abruptly ended. Chase didn’t bother telling Maggie what his mother said, but he suspected she somehow knew. She hadn’t returned to the house after that day.

  “You know, I think I should head home,” Maggie replied and her fingers ran over the steering wheel. “There’s this girl I’ve sort of been talking to in Vancouver, I told her I would Skype her later.”