Second Rate Chances

by Stephens, Holly

  Dr. Langdon nodded. “I can imagine this must be hard for you, realizing that the people you’ve loved for so long now have nothing to do with you.

  “Tell me – on the drive to Lil’s – did you remember anything? When you were at the house, did something there trigger a memory?”

  “No, but we did make plans to go buy a Christmas tree on Wednesday.” When Dr. Langdon furrowed his brow, a clear sign of confusion, Sam explained. “It was something we had done together since our freshman year in college. I’m hoping that doing something as familiar as that will help me.”

  “I see. Well, it sounds to me like you’re making good progress then. I’m assuming seeing the house, being as it’s where you remember living, is what helped you get some rest.”

  Sam felt uncomfortable. He bit his bottom lip and looked away from Dr. Langdon. “I…uh…spent the night at Lil’s.”

  The silence in the room that followed Sam’s news lingered for several minutes. Finally, Sam looked at Dr. Langdon who stared back at him with an unreadable expression. He really hated that this guy showed no emotions.

  “You spent the night?” Dr. Langdon asked slowly like he was trying to process the information.

  “Not spend the night, spend the night.” Sam tried to explain. “I slept on the couch and she slept in her room. There was no funny business.”

  “I have to ask, what does Ms. Miles say about all of this? Surely your fiancée would be unhappy about you staying over at your ex-girlfriend’s house.”

  “Chloe’s out of town,” Sam said. “I guess she’s giving me my space.”

  “How does that make you feel, her being away and not seeing you through this ordeal?”

  Sam sighed and threw his head back, his hands rubbing his now tired eyes. “I’ve never been that guy who cheated on his girlfriends. But I feel like my brain is split in two. There’s this one side that knows Lil as my girlfriend even though she’s not. I want to spend time with her because she’s what I know and hearing people say I’m going to marry Chloe makes me feel like I’m cheating on her.

  “Then there’s the other side that apparently does know Chloe enough to love her and ask her to marry me, but I don’t know her. I feel like I’m betraying her too.”

  Sam heard the scrape of Dr. Langdon’s chair against the wood floor. He lifted his head and followed the man as he moved around his desk and took a seat on the edge right in front of Sam.

  “This is normal, Sam. Amnesia patients aren’t guaranteed results overnight. Your mind is in a tug of war between who you were and who you are now. It’s going to take time. Your memories may come back tomorrow; they may come back next week. It could even be six months from now. Stop beating yourself up about this and just be the you that you know. If that means spending time with Lil, then do that. If it means calling Chloe and getting to know her all over again, then do that. You need to do what you think is going to help you get better.”

  When Dr. Langdon said it that way it made perfect sense to Sam. He had been beating himself up over everything. Between wanting to spend time with Lil and guilty that he didn’t care for a woman he obviously did care about. He needed to slow down and take things one day at a time. One woman at a time. Right now, his mind was telling him that woman was Lil.

  Dr. Langdon had made his way back to his chair behind his desk.

  “I think that’ll be all for today. I’d like to see you a week from tomorrow, same time.”

  Sam nodded and stood. He took the reminder card Dr. Langdon had filled out for him and thanked him for the session. He smiled and said goodbye to the receptionist outside the door and made his way to the elevator. While waiting for the doors to open, Sam turned his cell phone back on and was immediately alerted of a new voice mail. His heart pounded, hoping it was from Lil, but it was Titan’s office asking him to call them back.

  Sam rode down the elevator and waited until he was outside the building, before he called them back.

  “Thank you for calling Titan Gaming, how may I direct your call?” the dispatcher asked.

  “Mr. Miles please.”

  “One moment.”

  Sam waited for the call to be put through to Mr. Miles. He had a nervous feeling that whatever the man had to say couldn’t be good. Did he know he had spent the night with Lil? Yes, technically Sam was engaged to his daughter so he couldn’t imagine him being happy to hear that his ex-girlfriend was helping him through his recovery.

  “Mr. Miles’ office. Heidi speaking.”

  “Heidi, this is Sam Travers.”

  “Oh, Mr. Travers. This is Heidi Nicholson, Mr. Miles’, CEO of Titan Gaming, personal assistant.”

  Sam rolled his eyes. He figured that much was true. She could have saved herself from the spiel. He lost three years of his life, not all of it.

  “Mr. Miles would like to speak with you this afternoon. Will four o’clock work for you?”

  “That should be fine,” Sam said. “Do you know what this is about?”

  “No, I can’t say that I do. I’ll let him know to expect you at four sharp. Have a great day Mr. Travers.”

  The line disconnected before Sam could offer a proper goodbye. He looked at the time and wondered what he was going to do with his day. It was nine in the morning, so he had a good seven hours before he had to face whatever wrath he was sure he was going to get.

  ~~~~

  Sam spent the next several hours in his condo. He had reacquainted himself with the staff downstairs. Cosmo was someone he sensed looked after him. They talked about the accident, Cosmo had told him in detail what had happened that morning, and he was starting to feel better about the place he now called home.

  He kept his mind from wandering by doing mundane tasks he had neglected since coming home from the hospital. Laundry had piled up so he started several loads and ordered takeout for lunch.

  It was later in the day, as he was putting away socks and boxers when his hand touched a soft velvet box in the back of his drawer. It was packed tight in the back, so he removed the drawer from the dresser to get a better grip on it.

  The box was a deep red. It was a long skinny box that made Sam think there was a piece of jewelry inside. The hinges on the box creaked when he opened it, like it hadn’t been pried apart in a longtime. What lay inside made his breath hitch.

  It was a stunning, thin silver bracelet with an infinity symbol in the middle. He lightly touched the cuff, afraid if he applied too much pressure it would tarnish. This was for Lil. He wasn’t sure how he knew, but he did. For some reason, he had kept something he had meant to give to her, pushed away in the back of his underwear and sock drawer.

  Sam had planned to buy Lil something for Christmas, he wasn’t sure what. Now he knew. This belonged to her a longtime ago and it was time he finally gave it to her.

  ~~~~

  Titan Gaming was three blocks from Sam's building. He stepped out into the cold winter air, wrapping his double-breasted wool jacket tighter around his body. Instead of having Cosmo bring his car around, Sam opted to walk the short distance to his office. Considering what had led him to the hospital he found it silly that he drove the three blocks to begin with.

  The Miles Tower, where Titan Gaming was located, was one of the tallest buildings downtown. Its high-rise concept structure and gleaming windows were intimidating upon first glance. The lobby was quiet and clean, no sign that video gaming took place anywhere in the office. A receptionist sat at a very modern desk, her legs crossed at the ankles. On the lobby floor there was a coffee shop, the chain joint that was on nearly every corner of downtown but nowhere in sight in the Village.

  Sam walked to the triple set of elevator doors and punched the up button. He waited, tapping his foot gently against the shiny floor, until the doors dinged open. When he stepped in, he hit the button for the twenty-third floor, and waited in silence as the elevator carried him nearly to the top floor.

  When the doors opened, Sam walked slowly out into the lobby, which like the mai
n floor, had a glass desk with a young woman behind it. He had only ever been to this floor once when he had been called in with his team to be congratulated on a job well done after the release of a highly anticipated game that was experiencing technical problems due to the real-life nature of the system. His team had been able to work out the kinks and still meet the deadline for the release.

  As he approached the girl, who appeared to be a little younger than him, she smiled and stood, closing the distance that separated them. “Mr. Travers, it's so nice to see you out and about. Can I get you something to drink while you wait for Mr. Miles?”

  “Um...no thank you.”

  “Alright, he'll be with you in just a few moments. Perhaps you'd like to take a seat in one of the chairs.” She gestured to the row of modern metal chairs that looked like they belonged in a space ship. Again with the monochromatic color scheme. He and Mr. Miles must have used the same decorator. If he had to guess, he would have assumed Chloe was a person of interest.

  It wasn't long before Mr. Miles strode out of his office and with long strides, made his way toward Sam. On instinct, Sam stood to meet the man who challenged him in height.

  Both men stood at a little over six feet tall. Where Sam was on the slim and lean side, Mr. Miles had a stocky build. His gray hair combed back over his head, his eyes looked anything but friendly. In fact, Sam thought, they looked like those of snake about to consume its prey.

  “Sam,” Mr. Miles said with what was supposed to be a friendly and welcoming smile. “It's good to see you. Please, come into my office.”

  He ushered Sam to a set of double oak doors on the far side of the room. “Heidi, hold my calls until we're done, please.”

  When the doors shut behind them, Mr. Miles asked Sam to take a seat. Instead of the uncomfortable chairs that no doubt came from IKEA that were in the waiting area, Mr. Miles’ office was stocked with plush furnishings. Rich colors of reds and gold’s adorned the tapestries of the chairs and the curtains. Doing as he was told, Sam took a seat and waited for Mr. Miles to continue.

  “So tell me, how the recovery is coming along?” he began.

  “I'm not quite sure, sir. I still don't remember anything but I'm working on it.”

  “Good, good. That's real good. Chloe tells me she'll be in New York for a couple of weeks finishing up a few last-minute details for the wedding.”

  Sam nodded. “Yes sir.” He didn’t want to say much for fear that his emotions regarding his daughter leaving would be written all over his face.

  “It's important, Sam, that your memory return. For the sake of my daughter and for you.” Mr. Miles gave Sam a pointed stare as the warning words hung in the air. “With that being said, I'm here to help in any way that I can. In fact, I'm going to start with giving you time off, paid of course, so that you can do whatever it is that you need to do to recover from this traumatic event.”

  “Thank you,” Sam replied. “I appreciate that considering I'm not even sure what my job is.” Sam gave a nervous laugh, hoping to ease the tension from the room.

  “Exactly.” Mr. Miles said, with no hint of a smile at Sam’s uneasy laughter. “With it being the holiday season and all, I'd hate for something to be screwed up just because I need another man around the office. Your primary job is to focus on getting back your memory. Chloe has been planning this wedding since she was a little girl and it's important to me that she gets what she wants.”

  Sam really couldn't understand how his life had come to this. Engaged to be married to a woman who thought only of herself. A soon to be father-in-law who was more like a viper than a father figure. Sam needed answers on how he had come to be in this situation.

  “Until I hear from Chloe regarding your memory,” Mr. Miles nodded to the door and Sam took that as his cue to leave. Fine by him, he thought. The sooner he left this office, the better off he’d be.

  As Sam stood and nodded to Mr. Miles, he turned around and made his way to the doors. “One more thing,” Mr. Miles called out when Sam was an arm’s length from the door. “You break my daughter’s heart and you can kiss your job and your condo goodbye. Do we have an understanding?”

  Sam didn’t give him the satisfaction of a reply. He calmly walked out of the office, leaving the same way he came in. Once outside, he started walking back to his condo but it wasn’t to crash in the place he now realized his boss and soon-to- be father-in-law owned. In fact, Sam didn’t want to step back in the space ever again. No, he headed there for his car. He had only one place in mind to go and wind down.

  91

  SECOND RATE CHANCES

  CHAPTER 13

  Sam drove until he saw the familiar building. Rusty’s Bar was housed in the fire station that once serviced all of Fair Haven before there was downtown and the village. He pulled into the parking lot that was on the side of the building and sat in his car, looking at the name painted in white script letters on the brick.

  He stepped out into the frigid afternoon, the sun going down just behind the bar and the adjoining shops, turning the sky into evening. There was a chill was in the air without the sun there to provide warmth.

  Sam walked to the building, his hands shoved deep into his pockets. As he stood in front of the door, he looked up at the two-story building. The windows, both upstairs and the two on either side of the front door advertised different beers. Neon lights flashed, hypnotizing people who passed by.

  Sam had spent a lot of time in Rusty’s over the years. From college days to post graduation, it was a place he and his friends ended up after a long day. They had a table in the back that was always saved for them.

  He opened the door; the sound of the bell above dinged as he entered. He wondered if he still visited Rusty’s. If not, did Rusty still own the place? Had one of his kids taken over?

  The well-worn wood floor looked as if it were from an old saloon. It had nicks in places where bottles had busted. It was lighter in other places where the continuous flow of feet moved.

  The door shut behind Sam, triggering the man behind the counter to acknowledge him. The man looked back to his task then jerked his head back in Sam’s direction. A smile grew on the old man’s face. He tossed the dishrag over his shoulder, as Sam walked closer to the bar.

  “Well, I’ll be damned. Sam Travers. I didn’t think I’d ever see you in here again, boy.”

  Well, that answered Sam’s question on whether or not he still came here.

  “Rusty,” Sam said, extending his hand over the wood top bar. Rusty took it, but didn’t shake. He pulled Sam’s arm, tugging him nearly to the other side. Rusty hugged Sam’s neck and Sam noticed the man still smelled like the inside of his bar – like stale smoke and week old beer.

  He looked the same, other than the graying hair in his goatee. Rusty was about five seven, with a head he shaved as smooth as a baby’s bottom. He was an ex-marine who obviously continued his workout routine.

  “Been a long damn time, son. It’s true what they say?”

  Sam nodded. “Don’t remember a thing from the last three years.”

  Rusty shook his head. “Damn shame, boy. Though I have to say, if it brought you back in here then I’m mighty glad.”

  Sam had to laugh. “I guess I’m sorry I haven’t been by.” With a shrug of shoulders Sam added. “Not sure why I stopped coming in.”

  “Oh, it’s all right,” Rusty said, waving off Sam’s apology. “People, they come and they go. Can’t live in a bar, Sam. If you do you either own one or you’re a drunk. You were too smart to own one and that pretty girl of yours always made sure you knew your limit.

  “Speaking of…” Rusty began.

  “Lil’s here?” Sam asked, hopeful that maybe he would get to see her before Wednesday.

  “No, but your buddies are. Kane and Abe,” Rusty pointed to the corner of the bar where their table still stood. “All I need is Lil here and Ellie in an apron serving up drinks. It’ll be like old times. What can I get for ya?”

  “Wh
atever you have on tap is fine,” Sam said.

  “Son, I got ten different kinds of beers on tap now!” Rusty laughed, his eyes gleaming. “I’ve moved up in the world. No more whatever truck comes in to refill my keg.”

  Sam smiled. “In that case, I’ll take something new. Something you didn’t have three years ago.”

  Rusty nodded and grabbed a mug from under the bar. He filled the glass, keeping it cocked to the side so that there was more beer than foam. Sam pulled out his wallet as Rusty slid the glass across the counter to him.

  “Put your money away, kid. This one’s on the house.”

  “Thanks, Rusty.” Sam walked away, his beer in hand, over to Kane and Abe. They were sitting side by side at a small table, talking low to one another while their eyes took in the changes to the space. Sam noted that not much had changed. Neon signs took up most of the wall space, along with pictures of patrons that were regular customers. Sam knew somewhere on these walls there was a picture of him, Lil, Kane, and Abe. If memory served him correctly, there was more than one on these walls.

  “Mind if I join you?” he asked. Kane and Abe looked up as Sam spoke. His stomach twisted in knots. He wasn’t sure if they would welcome him, or chase him away with pitchforks.

  Kane shrugged like he didn’t care what Sam did. Sam took that as a yes, and settled in across from his old friends.

  A few moments of silence passed. Sam sipped the unfamiliar beer Rusty had served him, enjoying the crisp, clean taste. It wasn’t bitter like some beers were. It had a nice flavor and no bad after taste.

  “Listen guys,” Sam said, as the silence began to weigh in on him. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what I’ve done in the past and I don’t expect you to forgive me for whatever it was. But regardless, I must have fucked up pretty bad to lose my two best friends and my girlfriend.”