AgathaChristie-ParkerPineDetective
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"I should have said, perhaps, any light flirtations?"
"I never bothered about women much."
"A mistake. You must start now."
Mr. Wade looked alarmed. "Oh, look here, I
couldn't really. I mean--"
"You will be put to no trouble in the matter. One of
my staff will be supplied for the purpose. She will tell
you what is required of you, and any attentions you pay
her she will, of course, understand to be merely a matter
of business."
Mr. Wade looked relieved. "That's better. But do
you really thinkmI mean, it seems to me that Iris will be
keener to get rid of me than ever."
"You do not understand human nature, Mr. Wade.
Still less do you understand feminine human nature. At
the present moment you are, from the feminine point of
view, merely a waste product. Nobody wants you. What
use has a woman for something that no one wants?
None whatever. But take another angle. Suppose your
wife discovers that you are looking forward to regaining
your freedom as much as she is?"
"Then she ought to be pleased."
"She ought to be, perhaps, but she will not be!
Moreover, she will see that you have attracted a fasci-nating
young woman--a young woman who could pick
and choose. Immediately your stock goes up. Your wife
knows that all her friends will say it was you who tired
of her and wished to marry a more attractive woman.
That will annoy her."
"You think so?"
"I am sure of it. You will no longer be 'poor dear old
Reggie.' You will be 'that sly dog Reggie.' All the dif-ference
in the world! Without relinquishing the other
man, she will doubtless try to win you back. You will
not be won. You will ensible and to her all her
THE CASE OF THE DISCONTENTED HUSBAND
55
arguments. 'Much better to part.' 'Temperamentally
unsuited.' You realize that while what she said was
true--that you had never understood her--it is also true
that she had never understood you. But we need not go
into this now; you will be given full instructions when
the time comes."
Mr. Wade seemed doubtful still. "You really think
that this plan of yours will do the trick?" he asked
dubiously.
"I will not say I am absolutely sure of it," said Mr.
Parker Pyne cautiously. "There is a bare possibility that
your wife may be so overwhelmingly in love with this
other man that nothing you could say or do will affect
her, but I consider that unlikely. She has probably been
driven into this affair through boredom--boredom with
the atmosphere of uncritical devotion and absolute
fidelity with which you have most unwisely surrounded
her. If you follow my instructions, the chances are, I
should say, ninety-seven percent in your favor."
"Good enough," said Mr. Wade. "I'll do it. By the
way--er--how much?"
"My fee is two hundred guineas, payable in ad-vance."
Mr. Wade drew out a check book.
The grounds of Lorrimer Court were lovely in the
afternoon sunshine. Iris Wade, lying on a long chair,
made a delicious spot of color. She was dressed in deli-cate
shades of mauve and by skillful make-up managed
to look much younger than her thirty-five years.
She was talking to her friend Mrs. Massington, whom
she always found sympathetic. Both ladies were af-flicted
with athletic husbands who talked stocks and
shares and golf alternately.
"--and so one learns to live and let live," finished
Iris.
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"You're wonderful, darling," said Mrs. Massington
and added too quickly: "Tell me, who is this girl?"
Iris raised a weary shoulder. "Don't ask me! Reggie
found her. She's Reggie's little friend! So amusing. You
know he never looks at girls as a rule. He came to me
and hemmed and hawed, and finally said he wanted to
ask this Miss de Sara down for the week-end. Of course
I laughed--I couldn't help it. Reggie, you know! Well,
here she is."
"Where did he meet her?"
"I don't know. He was very vague about it all."
"Perhaps he's known her some time."
"Oh, I don't think so," said Mrs. Wade. "Of
course," she went on, "I'm delighted--simply de-lighted.
I mean, it makes it so much easier for me, as
things are. Because I have been unhappy about Reggie;
he's such a dear old thing. That's what I kept saying to
Sinclair--that it would hurt Reggie so. But he insisted
that Reggie would soon get over it; it looks as if he were
right. Two days ago Reggie seemed heartbrokenmand
now he wants this girl down! As I say, I'm amused. I
like to see Reggie enjoying himself. I fancy the poor
fellow actually thought I might be jealous. Such an ab-surd
idea! 'Of course,' I said, 'have your friend down.'
Poor Reggie--as though a girl like that could ever care
about him. She's just amusing herself."
"She's extremely attractive," said Mrs. Massington.
"Almost dangerously so, if you know what I mean. The
sort of girl who cares only for men. I don't feel, some-how,
she can be a really nice girl."
"Probably not," said Mrs. Wade.
"She has marvelous clothes," said Mrs. Massington.
"Almost too exotic, don't you think?"
"But very expensive."
"Opulent. She's too opulent-looking."
"Here they come," said Mrs. Massington.
THE CASE OF THE DISCONTENTED HUSBAND
57
Madeleine de Sara and Reggie Wade were walking
across the lawn. They were laughing and talking to-gether
and seemed very happy. Madeleine flung herself
into a chair, tore off the bret she was wearing and ran
her hands through her exquisitely dark curls. She was
undeniably beautiful.
"We've had such a marvelous afternoon!" she cried.
"I'm terribly hot. I must be looking too dreadful."
Reggie Wade started nervgusly at the sound of his
cue. "You look--you look--" He gave a little laugh. "I
won't say it," he finished.
Madeleine's eyes met his. It was a glance of complete
understanding on her part. Mrs. Massington noted it
alertly.
"You should play golf," said Madeleine to her
hostess. "You miss such a lot. Why don't you take it
up? I have a friend who did and became quite good, and
she was a lot older than you."
"I don't care for that sort of thing," said Iris coldly.
"Are you bad at games? How rotten for you! It
makes one feel so out of things. But really, Mrs. Wade,
coaching nowadays is so good that almost anyone can
play fairly well. I improved my tennis no end last sum-mer.
Of course I'm hopeless at golf."
"Nonsense!" said Reggie. "You only need coaching.
Look how you were getting those brassie shots this
afternoon."
"Because you showed me how. You're a wonderful
teacher. Lots of peo
ple simply can't teach. But you've
got the gift. It must be wonderful to be you--you can do
everything."
"Nonsense. I'm no good--no use whatever." Reggie
was confused.
"'You must be very proud of him," said Madeleine,
turning to Mrs. Wade. "How have you managed to
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Agatha Christie
keep him all these years? You must have been very
clever. Or have you hidden him away?"
Her hostess made no reply. She picked up her book
with a hand that trembled.
Reggie murmured something about changing, and
went off.
"I do think it's so sweet of you to have me here," said
Madeleine to her hostess. "Some women are so suspi-cious
of their husbands' friends. I do think jealousy is
absurd, don't you?"
"I do indeed. I should never dream of being jealous
of Reggie."
"That's wonderful of you! Because anyone can see
that he's a man who's frightfully attractive to women. It
was a shock to me when I heard he was married. Why
do all the attractive men get snapped up young?"
"I'm glad you find Reggie so attractive," said Mrs.
Wade.
"Well, he is, isn't he? So good-looking, and so fright-fully
good at games. And that pretended indifference of
his on women. That spurs us one, of course."
"I suppose you have a lot of men friends," said Mrs.
Wade.
"Oh, yes. I like men better than women. Women are
never reallynice to me. I can't think why."
"Perhaps you are too nice to their husbands," said
Mrs. Massington with a tinkly laugh.
"Well, one's sorry for people sometimes. So many
nice men are tied to such dull wives. You know, 'arty'
women and highbrow women. Naturally, the men want
someone young and bright to talk to. I think the modern
ideas of marriage and divorce are so sensible. Start
again while one is still young with someone who shares
one's tastes and ideas. It's better for everybody in the
end. I mean, the highbrow wives probably pick up some
THE CASE OF THE DISCONTENTED HUSBAND 59
long-haired creature of their own type who satisfies
them. I think cutting your losses and starting again is a
wise plan, don't you, Mrs. Wade?."
"Certainly."
A certain frostiness in the atmosphere seemed to
penetrate Madeleine's consciousness. She murmured
something about changing for tea and left them.
"Detestable creatures these modern girls are," said
Mrs. Wade. "Not an idea in their heads."
"She's got one idea in hers, Iris," said Mrs. Massing
ton.
"That girl's in love with Reggie."
"Nonsense!"
"She is. I saw the way she looked at him just now.
She doesn't care a pin whether he's married or not. She
means to have him. Disgusting, I call it."
Mrs. Wade was silent a moment, then she laughed un-certainly.
"After all," she said, "what does it matter?"
Presently Mrs. Wade, too, went upstairs. Her hus-band
was in his dressing room changing. He was
singing.
"Enjoyed yourself, dear?" said Mrs. Wade.
"Oh, er--rather, yes."
"I'm glad. I want you to be happy."
"Yes, rather."
Acting a part was not Reggie Wade's strong point,
but as it happened, the acute embarrassment occasioned
by his fancying he was doing so did just as well. He
avoided his wife's eye and jumped when she spoke to
him. He felt ashamed; hated the farce of it all. Nothing
could have produced a better effect. He was the picture
of conscious guilt.
"How long have you known her?" asked Mrs. Wade
suddenly.
"Er--who?"
"Miss de Sara, of course."
"Well I don't quite know. I mean--oh some tim
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"Really? You never mentioned her."
"Didn't I? I suppose I forgot."
"Forgot indeed!" said Mrs. Wade. She departed with
a whisk of mauve draperies.
After tea Mr. Wade showed Miss de Sara the rose
garden. They walked across the lawn conscious of two
pairs of eyes raking their backs.
"Look here." Safe out of sight in the rose garden,
Mr. Wade unburdened himself. "Look here, I think
we'll have to give this up. My wife looked at me just
now as though she hated me."
"Don't worry," said Madeleine. "It's quite all
right."
"Do you think so? I mean, I don't want to put her
against me. She said several nasty things at tea."
"It's all right," said Madeleine again. "You're doing
splendidly."
"Do you really think so?"
"Yes." In a lower voice she went on: "Your wife is
walking round the corner of the terrace. She wants to
see what we're doing. You'd better kiss me."
"Oh!" said Mr. Wade nervously. "Must I? I
mean--"
"Kiss me!" said Madeleine fiercely.
Mr. Wade kissed her. Any lack of lan in the performance
was remedied by Madeleine. She flung her
arms round him. Mr. Wade staggered.
"Oh!" he said.
"Did you hate it very much?" said Madeleine.
"No, of course not," said Mr. Wade gallantly. "It
--it just took me by surprise." He added wistfully:
"Have we been in the rose garden long enough, do you
think?"
"I think so," said Madeleine. "We've put in a bit of
good work here."
They returned to the lawn.' Mrs. Massington in
THE CASE OF THE DISCONTENTED HUSBAND 61
formed them that Mrs. Wade had gone to lie down.
Later, Mr. Wade joined Madeleine with a perturbed
face.
"She's in an awful state--hysterics."
"Good."
"She saw me kissing you."
"Well, we meant her to."
"I know, but I couldn't say that, could I? I didn't
know what to say. I said it had just--just--well, happened.
' '
"Excellent."
"She said you were scheming to marry me and that
you were no better than you should be. That upset
me--it seemed such awfully rough luck on you. I mean,
when you're just doing a job. I said that I had the utmost
respect for you and that what she said wasn't true
at all, and I'm afraid I got angry when she went on
about it."
"Magnificent!"
"And then she told me to go away. She doesn't want
ever to speak to me again. She talked of packing up and
leaving." His face was dismayed.
Madeleine smiled. I'll tell you the answer to that
one. Tell her that you'll be the one to go; that you'll
pack up and clear out to town."
"But I don't want to!"
"That's all right. You won't have to. Your wife
would hate to think of you amusing yourself in London.''
The following morning Reggie Wade had a fresh
bulletin to impart.
"She says she's been thinking, and that it isn't fair for
her to go away when she agreed to stay six months. But
sh
e says that as I have my friends down here she doesn't
see why she shouldn't have hers. She is asking Sinclair
Jordan."
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"Is he the one?"
"Yes, and I'm damned if I'll have him in my. house!"
"You must," said Madeleine. "Don't worry. I'll attend to him. Say that on thinking things over you have
no objection, and that you know she won't mind your
asking me to stay on, too."
"Oh, dear!" sighed Mr. Wade.
"Now don't lose heart," said Madeleine. "Everything
is going splendidly. Another fortnight--and all
your troubles will be over."
"A fortnight? Do you really think so?" demanded
Mr. Wade.
"Think so? I'm sure of it," said Madeleine.
A week later Madeleine de Sara entered Mr. Parker
Pyne's office and sank wearily into a chair.
"Enter the Queen of Vamps," said Mr. Parker Pyne,
smiling.
"Vamps!" said Madeleine. She gave a hollow laugh.
"I've never had such uphill work being a vamp. That
man is obsessed by his wife! It's a disease.?
Mr. Parker Pyne smiled. "Yes, indeed. Well, in one
way it made our task easier. It is not every man, my dear
Madeleine, whom I would expose to your fascination so
lightheartedly."
The girl laughed. "If you knew the difficulty I had to