by Dani April
Theirs had been a doomed relationship from the start, and she supposed that is why they had gotten off to such a rocky beginning out in the desert. Could it have been for the best if they had never met again after that first week together? No, she refused to believe that. This time had been worth the price no matter what the future brought.
The future closed in on them faster than she ever would have expected.
* * * *
Peter had been out late that night. It was already approaching ten o’clock in the evening. Rebecca knew he had recently been working on some management changes at the companies he owned, so she was not concerned. Actually, she was happy to see him interest himself in something positive like his business ventures.
She had changed the kitty litter and poured Rodney a saucer of milk. Then she curled up on the sofa and watched a late night talk show. Peter had called her earlier and told her he would not be too much longer. He told her he hoped she would go out for a walk with him when he got home. His voice sounded strange. He had not been looking well for the past few days, and she was dreading the possible approach of another spell.
Peter opened the door with his key. Rebecca had almost fallen asleep on the sofa watching the talk show.
“Hey there,” she greeted him, coming awake the moment he entered the apartment.
They went to each other and hugged. He gave her a kiss on the top of her head. This interaction seemed so natural now.
“How was your day?” he asked.
“Busy as always.” She held onto him for a few seconds longer. “How are you feeling tonight?”
“I feel like taking a walk over to the park. Will you join me?”
“Yes. Let me put on a sweater, and we can go.” She grabbed a plastic bottle of water out of the refrigerator and threw it in her backpack. When Peter took her out for a walk, it would be a long one, and she found herself getting thirsty.
The night was cool and clear. It was a lovely evening with stars dotting the sky and a sliver of a moon adding light. As soon as she was outside, Rebecca realized she didn’t need the sweater. Peter’s warmth was enough for her, and he draped his arm over her shoulder as they lazily strolled along. At that hour of the night, most people had already gone inside, and it felt like they had the entire city all to themselves.
“Are you sure you’re feeling all right?” Rebecca leaned into him for warmth. “You’re looking a little pale tonight. Do you need me to give you some of my blood when we go back?”
“I’m always pale. That’s nothing to worry about.”
“It’s been a week since you’ve taken any blood. Unless you’ve snuck someone else’s in I don’t know about.”
“No,” he assured her, and she knew he wanted to change the subject. He always felt uncomfortable talking about his health. They both recognized that he was sick, but rarely discussed it.
They strolled on for a bit in silence. The neighborhood they walked through contained old houses and apartments. Whenever Rebecca walked these streets with Peter, she felt at peace. She thought of all the families that had lived here over the years, and because she had Peter at her side, she felt closer to them. She reached into her backpack and took out the bottle of water, taking a sip out of it. She was working up a sweat from the long walk.
“I met with my attorneys tonight. That’s why I was late coming home,” he told her after they had walked some more in silence. “I had them make a will for me.”
“That’s silly.” She snuggled closer under his arm as they walked. “Vampires don’t need wills.” The direction their conversation was taking was scaring her.
“I’m leaving everything I have to you, Rebecca.” They had reached Fulton Street now and stopped under a streetlight just in front of the park. Rebecca didn’t even want to look at Peter. He was frightening her. She looked across the street at Golden Gate Park instead.
“I don’t want to talk about this, Peter. Just take me for a walk in the park like we had planned.”
They ran across the street. The traffic light was red, but no traffic was in sight. After they were across, they got off Fulton and started down a path leading into Golden Gate Park. Rebecca was no longer walking at Peter’s side. She had gotten a few steps ahead of him. It was as if she was trying to escape his words.
“We should talk about it, Rebecca,” he told her, following behind. “Because we don’t have much longer left to be together.” He came up to her side and took her hand inside his own and giving her a slight pat on the small of her back for comfort. “This is a beautiful night. The park is wonderful at night and made for lovers. Let’s just enjoy the time we have.”
“You made out a will because you think you’re going to die?” It was all Rebecca could do to hold the emotion out of her voice.
“Yes,” he answered her. “I know I am dying now.”
She turned on him. “Well, then you should drink some blood. If you don’t want to drink my blood, then let me get you to the hospital. They can give you a transfusion. I won’t let you just give up, Peter.”
“I’m not giving up.” As always, everything he said was so convincing, only this time she did not want to be convinced by his words. “I’ve fought this disease for a long time. Long enough so that I lived to meet you and love you. But I’ve learned that a vampire has a finite life span. I’ve reached my limit.”
“How is that fair that you’ve reached your limit of life just when we started to…” She was going to say, “fall in love,” but she was afraid of the words.
“Life is never fair, Rebecca.” He held her face in his hands. “I’ve lived for over a thousand years. I know better than anyone.”
She looked up into his eyes fighting back the tears. “I love you, Peter.” She had never told him these words before. Now in her fear they flowed as naturally off her tongue as any others. “I won’t let you leave me.”
She could see him swell with pride. She had never seen him look like this before. Until this moment, she had not realized how much power she had over him, or how deeply he cared for her.
“Just to hear you say those words to me…” He gave her the loveliest smile she had ever seen. “I’ve had my happy ending now, Rebecca.”
“It’s not an ending yet, Peter!” She wanted to shout at him in the night. “I haven’t ever loved anyone until now. I’m twenty-six years old. I’ve waited for you my whole life. I won’t lose you!”
“Rebecca, I’ve never loved anyone before, and I am a thousand and twenty-six. And I have waited for you all of those years. Most of them were very lonely. But it was all worth it to live with you for these past months. We have experienced more in our time together than most people ever will. Let’s not be selfish. The two of us have had everything we could have ever asked for.”
“Peter, you’re the strongest person I’ve ever known. You can do anything. You’ll beat this thing. I know you will. I’ll help you.” Rebecca’s words came quickly. A tear was falling down her face. “You’re not alone anymore. I’m with you now.”
He hugged her. She felt the strength of his love in that embrace. “Thank you,” he told her. “Stay with me tonight until the sun comes up?”
“I will of course, Peter.” She was confused by everything he said and felt desperate. “But I think I should take you to the doctor or the hospital.”
“No.” He stopped her. “You are all I need.”
They walked for a few more minutes. She was holding him tighter than she ever had before. He stumbled once. That was not like him. The vampire was always sure-footed. As she tried cuddling up closer to him, she realized he was no longer warm. He felt cold to her now and almost lifeless.
They had crossed John F. Kennedy Drive and come upon Stow Lake. They had only passed a few other people in the park, and as they walked along the side of the small lake, they were alone. The moonlight sprinkled the green waters of the lake, and it was beautiful.
“It makes me happy to know that you are going to be all right, R
ebecca,” he told her as they stopped to look at the placid water. “You are going to be just fine. That’s why I had to hold on long enough to make out the will and change the ownership of my companies and holdings over to your name.”
“I don’t want your money, Peter.” More tears were falling down her face. “I want you.”
“You’ve got a wonderful future ahead of you.” He turned to her and brought her head up to face him. “I want you to promise me you’ll live every minute of it to the fullest extent possible.”
“Don’t do this, Peter.” She wiped off her face and tried to clear her throat. “Please don’t do this to me.”
He shook her in his hands. His grip didn’t even feel as secure as she had come to know it. “Promise me, Rebecca. Promise me you’ll go on with your life. That’s the last thing I need to hear to be at peace.”
She broke down completely then and fell into his arms. She rested her head on his shoulder and let her tears fall freely with her face hidden from his. She held him so tightly she thought she was going to snap him in two. Beneath the fabric of his clothes, even his muscles felt weak to her. She could literally see and feel the all-powerful, immortal vampire dying in front of her. He could only meekly return her heavy embrace.
“How long do we have?” she asked him.
“Not long.” She thought maybe she detected a hint of fear in his voice. He had lived for so long, and what he was feeling now must have been so abrupt and sudden. “That’s why I asked you to come out into the night with me. I don’t want us to waste a minute of our last time together…”
“Our last time?”
“This is my last night on earth. It will be over when the sun rises tomorrow.”
Rebecca whimpered and bit her lip. “Tonight?” she asked him.
“The night is so beautiful…and you are so beautiful.” He looked around at everything he saw in the world. Rebecca thought it was as if a child was looking at the great big world for the first time. “Don’t feel sorry for me. I have gotten everything I ever wanted. I won all of my battles. I am the luckiest vampire who ever was.”
“You’re weak, Peter,” she told him. She spotted a bench a few hundred yards further into the park and helped them to slowly head for it. He was unsteady on his feet and had a hard time keeping up. “Come on. Sit down over here with me.”
She helped him to take a seat. She leaned against him and was struck by his body temperature again. “You’re cold.” She felt agony as she touched his face. “You need a coat.”
“Vampires don’t get cold.”
“Dummy, I don’t think you’re much of a vampire anymore.” She took off her sweater and draped it across his chest. “Here, put this on.”
He reached out and touched her with an unsteady hand. “You really do love me, don’t you?” He seemed amazed that someone could actually love him.
“Yes. I do.” She bit back some more tears. “And I know you love me, too.”
“I love you with all my heart. You’re the only person I ever have loved.” He did not attempt to pull on the sweater but just sat quietly on the bench with her with the heavy wool fabric flung over his shoulders where she had placed it.
She sat with him and watched the world with him. In the background were the faintly heard sounds of traffic from the city streets. A night bug buzzed their faces a couple of times. She enjoyed the peace and the quiet and being close to him.
“Even when I was in the desert with you,” she reminisced, “and I was terrified, I had never felt so alive. Even then that’s how you made me feel—really alive for the first time ever.”
“You will have a long life, Rebecca.” Now his voice sounded scratchy and low.
“I know I will,” she assured him.
“You’ll find a man…not a vampire…but a real man. You’ll have babies and a family of your own.”
“That’s always been my dream.”
“I promise you it will come true.”
She pulled away from him, tears flowing freely down her cheeks. “Drink my blood, Peter!” She pulled on his shoulders to bring him close to her. “Drink it from my neck. Take as much as you need. Please, do it for me?”
“It’s no good. Not even your blood will help me anymore,” he shook his head. He stared back up at the stars in the heavens. “Vampires don’t vomit. Did you know that?”
“I didn’t know that. But what does that mean?
“Last week when I drank your blood, I vomited it up. That hasn’t happened in a thousand years of drinking blood.” His voice was distant and far away. He seemed tired as if he were about to fall asleep. He continued to look up at the stars as he spoke. “I tried taking blood from the hospital. I own the hospital, so it wasn’t hard to get. I drank it. I kept it down for about an hour. It was the most repulsive thing I had ever tasted. Then it all came back up. I can’t drink blood anymore, Rebecca. A vampire that can’t drink blood…”
“Will die…” she finished for him.
“I just have one more wish.”
“What’s that?”
“That’s east.” He pointed off to the dark horizon half lit up by the lights of the city. “I want to sit here on this bench with you in my arms and wait.”
She rested her head on his chest. A wave of hopelessness washed through her. “What are we waiting for, Peter?”
“Don’t fool yourself into thinking vampires don’t miss the sun. We do. We all do. I have not seen it in a thousand years. I want to see it again one last time.”
She wanted to hit him she was so mad at him, but of course she knew none of this was his fault. “But, Peter, you can’t. You’ll die!” She tried to rouse him up, but his weight was centered on the park bench and she could not budge him. “It is getting very late now. We really should be getting back home.”
“No, Rebecca. I’m going to watch the sun rise over Golden Gate Park. I am told that is a beautiful sight. I want to see it with my own eyes. Please stay and watch it with me.”
“You know I won’t leave you, Peter.” She was still trying to pull him up. They only had a few hours left. “But I’m not going to stay here and watch you kill yourself.”
“Rebecca, I don’t want to die down in that dark basement. Let me die in the sunlight? Please?” He was pleading with her. She had never been so terrified in her life.
“I don’t want you to die at all.”
“Neither of us can prevent that. All I’m asking is to die in the glory of the sunlight in the arms of the only human being I have ever loved. Please, Rebecca?”
She didn’t answer him. There was still plenty of time until the sun rose. She would have time to reason with him. She buried her head in his chest. He held her, but his arms were no longer strong. She had never felt so helpless or useless in her whole life. Hopelessness consumed her like a dark cloth falling over her head.
He had no heartbeat. He didn’t breathe or eat. All he did was drink blood and avoid the sunlight. What did death really mean for a vampire anyway? All Rebecca knew is she loved this vampire and she couldn’t lose him. She wanted to fight for him and make him fight for himself again, but she didn’t know how.
They waited in each other’s arms for a long time.
“I’m starting to forget the past,” he told her after they had sat listening to the silence of the night. “I don’t know if it’s the disease that has made me forget or if it’s simply because I want to. When one has lived as long as I have, there is a lot to forget.”
“Tell me what you’ve forgotten, Peter?”
“I’ve forgotten the crusades, the plagues, the wars, and the politics. I lived through them all, but I just can’t remember them now.” She could feel him shivering beneath her. She moved over him to cover him with the warmth of her body. Vampires were not supposed to feel the cold, but this one clearly was. “I’ve also forgotten the nights of carnal pleasure. There were a great many of those all over the world. But now the details of every one of them elude me.”
“You haven’t forgotten about us, have you?”
He gave her a weak smile. “Don’t worry. I’m losing my past. But we’re the present.”
She hiked up the sleeve of her shirt and looked down at her watch. “Peter, we only have two hours left.”
“I’m aware.” He sighed and looked down at her. “I can’t even read your thoughts anymore, Rebecca.”
“That’s good.” She laughed, but her face was still wet with tears. “We’re finally on even footing in this relationship then. I hated it when you read my mind. I always felt like I was walking around naked in front of you.”
“Um, that’s a nice thought.”
She gave him a playful pat on the arm. “Peter…” She looked down at his face. He had closed his eyes, and he was a deathly white color. “Peter?” For a few terrifying seconds, she was sure she had already lost him. Panic rose inside her. Then his eyes flickered open faintly, and he looked up at her.
“You’re beautiful,” he told her. “You were worth waiting a thousand years for.”
“I wish I could have been born back in the days of knights and honor and chivalry,” she told him, smiling at her own musings. “Then you could have rescued me. I would have let you turn me into a vampire, and we could have lived together all of these years.”
He nodded “We would have been the happiest vampires ever.”
She reached down and kissed him on the lips. She was no longer afraid that his vampire fluid would drug her. Even if it did she would not care. However, when she tasted his lips, they were just cold like the rest of him.
“Come back home with me while we still have time,” she begged him, any argument she might have had to get him up and moving again failing her.