“We’re getting a shower.” Gabe begin to remove her clothes. She put up no resistance.
“You and me?”
Gabe grinned. She really was out of it. “Yes, honey, you and me.” He cupped her face with his hands and kissed her before he turned her and opened the door to the shower stall. “In you go.” Gabe gave her a gentle nudge at her waist before she stepped under the water.
He quickly removed his clothes and joined her. Zoe was so tired she was just standing beneath the water, letting it fall on her shoulders. They’d had an intense night the night before with little sleep. He picked up the soap and started washing her. She purred as his hands slid over her. He was deeply aroused but Zoe needed rest more than he needed release.
When she shivered, Gabe increased the temperature of the hot water and put her further under it. He quickly soaped up and rinsed. Cutting off the shower, he opened the door and jerked a towel off the rack. He dried Zoe and wrapped her in a towel. A minute later he’d dried, dropped his towel on the floor and guided Zoe to the bed. He jerked the spread back then removed the towel from Zoe. “Climb in, honey, before you chill.”
She did as he said. Seconds later he joined her, pulling her to him and the covers snugly over them. In no time Zoe relaxed against him and was softly sleeping.
Contentment settled over him and he joined her.
* * *
The next evening when Gabe arrived home Zoe wasn’t there.
The security he’d found in having her waiting for him was suddenly gone. How had she, in such a short time, managed to become such an important part of his life? He looked forward to coming home to her. The house was empty—not just the space, but the life force that made it a home was gone. Could he survive if she moved out?
An hour went by and still Zoe hadn’t come home. Then another. He should have stayed at work. Guilt crept in. He had plenty of policies and procedures to read before he could start making serious changes to improve the program. He’d been leaving the hospital early far too often as it was to come home to see her. Now he was here and she wasn’t.
As time went by, guilt turned to anger then to worry, which grew like a virus in a lab tube to the point where Gabe kept checking his phone, thinking he’d missed her call. More than once he’d stopped himself from phoning her because he had promised not to question her movements or try to control her. This anxiety and the waste of his time was drama he didn’t need.
He loved having Zoe in his bed, but the emotionally draining side of their relationship would soon eat at him. Might even affect his job. He couldn’t have that. But letting Zoe go was unthinkable.
Relief flooded him at the sound of the garage door opening. She was home. He was waiting at the house door before she could get out of the car. Gabe said, more casually than he felt, “I’ve been worried about you.”
“I went by to see Mom for a few minutes. Told her about William Gabriel, then did a little shopping for the nursery.”
“You did?” Any residue of concern completely disappeared with the sound of happiness in her voice. At least the joy over the baby was overcoming her despair about her mother’s health.
“Come and help me bring these packages in.” Her head disappeared inside the car.
Gabe moved to stand beside her. She handed him a couple of huge plastic bags filled with fluffy items. “You did do some shopping.”
“You said you’d like me to fix up the nursery. I got off a few minutes early today, so I thought I’d pick up some things.”
“This is a little more than some.” He chuckled as he headed toward the door of the house. His pleasure at seeing her and his relief over her being home safe made any discord he’d felt earlier disappear.
“Babies need a lot.” Her tone held a defensive note.
“Hey, I was just kidding.” He put the bags down in the hallway and wrapped his arms around her waist. “You can buy twice as much, for all I care.”
Her hands were full of bags but her arms came around him anyway. “It was so much fun. I can hardly wait to show you what I got. I’m going to need your help.”
“You’ve got it. Have you eaten yet?”
“No.”
“Then why don’t I fix us some breakfast for supper? You can sit at the table with your feet up for a while and tell me about your day and how your visit with your mother went.” Who had he turned into? Nothing about those suggestions sounded like the person he thought he was. Zoe was changing him.
“That sounds great. Let me put these in the baby’s room.” She held up the bags in her hands. “I’m going to change into something more comfortable too.”
“Sounds like a plan. I’ll get started on dinner. Just leave these bags here and I’ll get them later.”
* * *
After eating, they spent the next two hours working in the nursery, and now Zoe sat on the floor, pulling open another package. She was dressed in baggy sweatpants and a shirt she had asked to borrow from him. Her skin was glowing, her eyes sparkled and she giggled as she showed him each new item. He couldn’t think of a time she’d looked more amazing. But didn’t he think that daily?
During the last hour he’d hung curtains under her direction and helped her place a bed skirt on the crib. He wasn’t sure it was particularly useful but he didn’t voice that out loud. All the time she had been chattering about her decision to get this or that and opening bags. Gabe didn’t care one way or the other about any of it but he was enjoying listening to Zoe. Her excitement was infectious.
“This is the last thing.” She opened the clear package and pulled out some material with a triumphant look.
* * *
“I have no idea what that is.” It wasn’t the first time he’d thought that about some of the objects she’d bought.
“It’s a crib sheet.”
“Oh.” He nodded sagely. “Should have known that right away. Hand it here and I’ll put it on and that way you don’t have to get up.”
“Are you saying I can’t?” There was a teasing note in her voice.
“No. I was just trying to be helpful. That’s all.”
“You weren’t implying I was fat.”
He grinned. “I know better than to do that.”
“You’d better not.”
After a struggle with the mattress and sheet that had Zoe giggling, Gabe finally had it in place. Done, he sat behind Zoe, spread his legs wide and wrapped her around her middle to bring her back until she rested against his chest. She placed her hands over his. He rested his chin on the top of her head.
He scanned the room, looking at the yellow and gray plaid curtains whose panels hung straight on either side of the windows, to the gray pillow with the yellow polka-dot cover, to the crib with a yellow sheet and the same plaid as the curtains on the bed skirt. He would have never thought to put those combinations together. He liked Zoe’s taste. “So, are you pleased?”
“Hmm... I am. I still need to get a mobile and I want to do his name above the crib.”
Gabe smiled. Her mind was still racing with ideas. “For someone who I had to talk into fixing up a nursery, you sure have run with it.”
“It’s fun, and you were right. Will needs a nice place to come home to.”
But not live. There was that sick feeling in his gut again.
Zoe yawned.
“I think I need to get you to bed. You’ve had a long day.” Gabe stood and then helped her up.
“I need to clean up this mess.” She started to pick up a bag.
He took her hand. “Leave it until tomorrow.” Gabe ushered her out of the room and turned off the light. He wanted her attention now.
* * *
Zoe was so tickled with the way the nursery had turned out. Gabe was a great help and even seemed to enjoy it. She hadn’t even hesitated when he’d led her to his bedroom. In a few shor
t nights she had started to think of it as hers. Sleeping without being in Gabe’s arms would be impossible.
They were climbing into bed when he said, “I called my mother today. Told her what name we had decided on. I think she cried.”
Zoe wasn’t sure what to say to that. “She liked it, then?”
“She loved it. She said my father would be so proud.” He gave Zoe a nudge to move further into the bed.
“What have you told your mother about me?”
“Nothing much really.”
“She didn’t ask any questions?” Zoe rolled to her side so she could see his face.
“I didn’t say that.”
Was he ashamed of her? Had he told his mother how easy Zoe had been to get into bed? She moved away from him. “Like what?”
“I told her your name. What you do for a living. That your mother is sick and you’re wonderful with her. That sort of thing. Enough about her.” He pulled Zoe toward him. “Let’s think about us.”
Zoe stopped his advance with a hand on his chest. Her look met his. She hated that she might ruin the happiness they had found together but she had to ask. “Gabe, what are we doing?”
“I don’t know” was his soft reply. “Let’s just see what happens.”
For tonight she could accept that but for how long? She was afraid that what happened would end up with her heart getting broken. Gabe drew her to him, giving her a deep kiss that had her thinking of nothing but what he made her body feel.
Their lovemaking had a desperate edge to it. As if what they had found they feared would soon disappear.
CHAPTER NINE
A WEEK LATER Zoe was on her way out of her office to make her weekly rounds to area hospitals. Her cell phone rang. Gabe’s name showed on the screen.
She and Gabe had spent a blissful week together. They had taken walks, visited her mom, enjoyed the patio and spent precious moments in bed, many times just in each other’s arms, talking. Yet there had been no more discussion of where their relationship was headed or what would happen after the baby was born. It was as if they were living in a bubble of happiness and they were the only ones who existed. They were pretending nothing would ever change, therefore no decisions needed to be made. Gabe’s silence told her that he hadn’t changed his mind about what his life would be. She couldn’t accept less than what she wanted. They were living on borrowed time. Despite all that, her heart did a flip at the mere thought of him.
She touched the button.
“Hi, honey.”
Would she ever get over the thrill of Gabe’s voice calling her that? “Hey.”
“I just received word there’s a match for Mr. Luther.”
“Really? That’s wonderful.” She couldn’t believe it. So soon. The wait was usually much longer. The match must have been perfect.
“I’ve already made the call for him to come in. Hold on a sec.” Gabe spoke to someone else then said, “He should be on his way now. I expect to be in surgery late this evening.”
“I’m on my way.”
He hurriedly said, “I don’t know if I’ll have a chance to see you or not.”
“I understand. I’ll be busy with Mr. Luther anyway.”
* * *
Gabe had been keeping exceptionally normal hours for the past week but she was sure that wouldn’t always be the case. As often as possible, liver transplants were done during business hours, but there were always emergency situations. She worked in the medical field, understood that better than most. Tonight was an example.
Forty-five minutes later she arrived at the hospital and took the elevator up to the third floor, where the liver transplant unit was located. She went to the nurses’ station and showed her credentials to the unit tech before requesting to look at Mr. Luther’s chart. Zoe had just finished her review and was headed to his room when Gabe walked up.
He smiled. “Hey, I thought I’d miss you.”
“Glad you didn’t.”
She glanced at the desk to find the unit clerk and a couple of nurses watching them.
“Come on. We’ll go and see Mr. Luther.” He put his hand on her back and directed her toward the other end of the hall.
At Mr. Luther’s door she knocked. When there was no answer, she pushed the door open slightly. “Mr. Luther?”
The room was dark and the TV wasn’t playing. Had the OR tech already come to get him? She moved further into the room with Gabe close behind. “Mr. Luther?”
A movement caught her attention. The man sat in a chair, looking out the window.
“Mr. Luther, it’s Zoe. May I come in?”
“If you want.”
It was as if all the blustery wind had gone out of the man. What was going on? “I needed to finalize some things before they come to take you to the OR. Dr. Marks is here too. May I turn the light on?”
“Please don’t. I’m enjoying the sunset.”
She knew that tone. It was the same one her father had used just before he’d left. The hopeless one. The one that said he had nothing to live for. Zoe wasn’t going to let the same thing happen to Mr. Luther that had happened to her father.
She glanced back at Gabe then went to stand beside Mr. Luther. “Mind if I watch with you?”
“If you want to.”
Gabe came to stand behind her. His hand came to rest on her waist. Would he have taken the time to do the same a few weeks ago?
The sky, already orange, slowly darkened to black. With the sun below the horizon, Gabe stepped back and she did too.
“I need to listen to you, Mr. Luther, before I have to go to the OR,” Gabe said.
The man nodded and moved back to the bed. After he settled in, he focused on Gabe.
He pulled his stethoscope from around his neck. “You know, Mr. Luther, I’m good at what I do. I’ve done many liver transplants. I don’t anticipate you having any problems.”
“If you say so.”
“I do. I want you to try not to worry.” Gabe listened to Mr. Luther’s heart.
“I thought if you didn’t mind I’d stay right here with you,” Zoe said as she stepped closer to the bed. “Maybe walk down to surgery with you. Would you mind?”
Mr. Luther, who had hardly had time for her when she’d visited, looked at her and smiled. “I’d like that.”
“Zoe,” Gabe said in a sharp voice and with a direct look. “It might run late.”
She met his glare. “I know.”
“You need to take care of yourself,” Gabe insisted.
Mr. Luther nodded toward Gabe but looked at her and asked, “So what’s the deal with you and the doctor here? That baby?”
Was their relationship that obvious? Apparently so. Under normal circumstances their conversation wouldn’t have taken place in front of a patient. At least it had Mr. Luther thinking of something besides his impending surgery.
Zoe stared at Gabe. What should they say? How like Mr. Luther to ask such a direct personal question.
Gabe straightened. “Zoe is carrying my baby. We’re having a boy.”
She liked the pride she heard in his voice.
As if Gabe’s statement had confirmed what he thought, Mr. Luther said, “Congratulations. Now, Doc, do you think you can put in that new liver?”
Zoe blinked at his change of attitude and subject.
“I can and I will. I’ll see you in the OR.” He looked at Zoe. “Can I speak to you in the hall?”
Zoe placed her hand on Mr. Luther’s arm. “I’ll be right back.” She followed Gabe out the door.
“You shouldn’t be spending long hours here,” Gabe hissed before she could completely close the door. “I don’t want to have to worry about you.”
“I’ll be fine. If I start feeling bad I’ll get one of the security guards to walk me out if necessary. I’ll just be in the
waiting room.” She glanced toward Mr. Luther’s room. “He needs to know someone is here for him. I promise to only stay as long as I feel up to it.”
“I guess there’s no point in arguing with you.” Gabe sounded resigned to the fact he couldn’t fight her.
She smiled sweetly. “No, I don’t think there is.”
“Okay, but if you do leave, will you please text me and let me know you made it home?”
“I will. Thanks for caring.”
Gabe’s look captured hers. “I do, you know.”
Joy flowed through her as hot as a beach in the summer. That was the closest Gabe had come to expressing his feelings. She smiled. “It’s always nice to hear. I care about you too.”
“Maybe we should talk about how much when I get home.” He checked his watch. “I have to go. My team is waiting.”
There was something about Gabe that hummed like electricity when he talked about doing surgery. His thoughts were already on the job ahead. He was in his element. Gabe knew how to save lives and did it well. She was proud of him. “I understand. I still have to do vitals on Mr. Luther.”
He briefly touched her hand before walking away. Hope burned bright. Were her dreams coming true?
* * *
Gabe couldn’t believe he had almost admitted to Zoe that he loved her in the middle of the hospital hallway. He had truly lost his mind where she was concerned. In his wildest dreams he would never have imagined opening his home to her would have also opened his heart. The last couple of weeks had been the most wonderful of his life. He’d never felt more content or cared for. Even going home had become more appealing than working late at the hospital. That had never entered his mind as a possibility or a desire before Zoe.
“Hello, ladies and gentlemen.” He spoke to his transplant team less than an hour later. He was pleased with how they were slowly coming together to create an impressive group. “I appreciate all of you making it a late evening.” With only their eyes visible over the masks they wore, they nodded. “This is our patient, Mr. Luther. He’ll be getting a new liver today. Let’s make sure he receives it in short order and with top care.”
A couple of his staff gave him a questioning look. Gabe moved to stand beside the table. He said to the anesthesiologist, “Are we ready?”
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