A House for Keeping

by Matteson Wynn

  Nor stared at him, assessing, then crossed her arms and said, “I’m good for it.”

  Technically, I was a homeless, one-suitcase-owning, college-bound orphan. I had no idea what kind of big one of anything I could deliver. But at this point, the more information I had, the better, so I said, “Sure.”

  “I may have gotten a look at some notes about the circumstances surrounding the original spell.”

  Nor said, “Private, classified council notes?”

  Wil ignored her. “The point is that the central component of the spell is the part about the Foster bonding with the house and staying on the premises. The primary purpose of the housekeeper is to keep the spell intact so the house remains in Foster possession. There is nothing about only Fosters being allowed in the actual house—it doesn’t matter with the housekeeper here.”

  To me, this just seemed like more of the bullshit I’d been dealing with since I got here. But this must’ve been truly stunning news because Nor dropped her lawyer face and looked shocked. Like open-mouthed, wide-eyed shocked.

  I rubbed my eyes and tried to focus. “So, all this time, the Fosters have been isolating the house and the housekeeper because they’re paranoid. Terrific. Did anyone ask the house how it felt about only ever seeing the Fosters?”

  They both looked blank.

  I shook my head at them and sighed. “Jeez, you guys. Okay, let me ask you this. Since the Fosters have spent all these years alone with the house, what’s its name?” I held up my hand. “I know, I’m a jerk for not thinking to ask sooner. In my defense, I’ve been a little bit overwhelmed with all this…well, everything. Still, it’s inexcusable. And obviously, you can’t go around just calling it ‘the house’ all the time. So…?”

  Wil clasped his hands in front of him and didn’t meet my eyes, “It does have a name. Did have a name. It was…lost.”

  “Whaddya mean it was lost?”

  Nor said, “That’s professor code for ‘We totally forgot it.’”

  I just blinked at them for a minute. “You forgot it.”

  Wil pushed his glasses up his nose and said, “Not me, personally, but our family. Yes. A long time ago, in fact. It’s so thoroughly lost that even I haven’t been able to track it down.” He started pacing again.

  Now I was the one staring at him with my mouth open. “That’s just…” I sputtered and threw up my hands. “The house has been helping the Fosters for, like, ever. You guys keep telling me how it’s such a big deal and so unique, and it’s got all this extra special magic. And they forgot its name? The least they can do is give the house the courtesy of referring to it by name. What is wrong with these people!” I thunked my head against the back of the couch and took a few deep breaths until I was sure I could talk without yelling. Staring at the ceiling, I said, “So, let me get this straight. The Fosters lost the house’s name. But then no one bothered to ever give it a new one? Or at least a nickname?”

  Wil sat down. “The convention for as far back as I’ve been able to research has been to simply refer to the house as, well, the house. To be honest, I don’t think anyone but the housekeeper really talks with the house, so it hasn’t been an issue.”

  I said, “So, to sum up: The Fosters bonded with the house so they could have the house and its special magic all to themselves. Then, they totally isolated the house, basically to make extra triple double sure that nobody else gets to play with the house, too. As a result, most of the time, the only contact the house has is with the housekeeper.”

  “Yes.”

  “The housekeeper who is the only one who ever talks to it.”

  “Yes.”

  “And who doesn’t even know its name.”

  “Yes.”

  I felt a little sick. “And that doesn’t strike you as wrong? Or cruel?”

  Obviously it didn’t because Wil gave me a blank look and said, “Uh…”

  “You said the house has been getting weaker for some time now?”

  “Yes.”

  “Did anyone think that it might be because the house was being mistreated, and it was tired and lonely?” Nor and Wil traded looks. I grimaced, “Don’t answer that. Of course they didn’t.”

  I didn’t have Wil’s background in the Fosters, but from what I’d learned so far, I was thinking they were horrible caretakers and very undeserving of the house, bond or no bond.

  I lay down on the couch and stroked the floor with one hand. “I’m so sorry, buddy,” I said.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  I’d apparently rendered Nor and Wil speechless, because they didn’t say anything after that. We all sort of spaced out for a few minutes, each lost in our own thoughts. Then we went to our corners and did our own thing.

  Nor and Wil each wound up doing stuff on their phones. I was still feeling like my limbs each weighed an extra 50 pounds, so I stayed lying down on the sofa, idly tracing the wood grain on the floor. Fuzzy hopped up and curled himself into a ball next to me. I’d just started to doze off when the door opened.

  Lars loomed in the doorway and said, “Let’s go.”

  “Lars, you do not have the authority to order us around,” said Nor, continuing to tap away on her phone.

  “It’s not an order. It’s a request.”

  Nor continued to tap away. “And if we refuse?”

  Lars said, “Do you really want to go down that road?”

  Nor looked up. “So it is an order then.” But she didn’t get up. Instead she looked over at me. “Finn, do you feel up to following Lars?”

  I eyeballed Lars. “While the idea of making him carry me has some merits, I suppose I can drag myself off the couch. I need a bathroom break anyway.”

  Nor looked at Wil. “Wil, are you in agreement that we should go?”

  “Sure.” Wil stood up.

  Lars said, “Great. Now can we get moving?”

  Nor remained seated, attention back on her phone. “Not until you tell us where we’re going and for what purpose.”

  I smirked. I couldn’t help it. I know it’s not wise to poke the big guy with the gun, but it felt so good to have some backup.

  Lars crossed his arms. I wondered if he did it just to make his muscles bulge to try and intimidate Nor.

  If so, he failed.

  He said, “We’re just going down the hallway to the kitchen. Sarah wants to see you.”

  “And she can’t come in here because…?”

  Lars said, “Don’t know. Don’t care. Let’s go.” Nor still didn’t move, so he said, “Now.”

  Nor sighed. She took her time standing up, did a long, slow stretch, then sauntered over to me rather than walking toward Lars.

  I’d hiked myself into a sitting position. Nor offered me her hand and helped pull me up off the couch.

  I turned around and scooped up Fuzzy, then followed Wil across the room toward Lars. Nor took up the rear. A glance back at her made me grin. She looked like a warrior going into battle—head held high, shoulders squared, and a look that said she was looking forward to kicking someone’s ass.

  “Glad you’re on my side,” I whispered.

  One corner of her mouth quirked up and she shot me a wink, then resumed her badassness as we passed by Lars.

  The Real Girl was in the hallway. He walked in front of us, while Lars followed behind Nor. I felt like we were prisoners on the march.

  They stopped almost immediately in front of the bathroom under the stairs. It’d have gone much quicker if they’d let us dash to our rooms, but they didn’t. They made us stand there and take turns like we were school kids on a field trip.

  No one spoke. The longer we stood there, the more awkward and weird it felt.

  When we’d all had a turn, Lars and the Real Girl walked us the remaining few feet toward the kitchen.

  But then they stopped us again, outside the kitchen door.

  “Why are we stopping here?” Wil asked.

  “Just wait,” said the Real Girl. He looked at Lars, who nodded, and th
en the Real Girl went to the back door, opened it, said, “We’re ready,” and closed it again.

  Ready for what? I wondered.

  I glanced behind me and stiffened. We were standing near the weird door—the one I’d seen all the people clustered around last night when the house hid me.

  The back door opened and Sarah, Meg, and Doug strolled into the house. Sarah took up position in the kitchen doorway with Meg and Doug in the kitchen behind her. Lars moved down the hallway, effectively blocking us from moving toward the front of the house. The Real Girl stood so he was blocking access to the back door and mudroom.

  The message was clear. We weren’t going anywhere until they allowed us to.

  Nor, Wil, and I bunched up in front of Sarah.

  Wil said, “Sarah, Meg, Doug,” nodding to each of them. He looked at Sarah and asked, “What’s happening?”

  Sarah said, “Final test.”

  Nor shouldered her way to the front, placing herself between me and Sarah. To my surprise, Wil shifted so he was standing shoulder-to-shoulder with her. I realized I was grinning.

  I glanced at Lars. He was eying Nor and Wil, assessing whether he needed to intervene. I caught his eye, and though I knew I shouldn’t, I stuck my tongue out at him.

  I nearly bit my tongue when he stuck his tongue out at me in return. He yanked it back in so quickly I wondered if I imagined it. I glanced around me but no one else seemed to have noticed.

  My attention switched to Nor, when she started talking.

  “Not acceptable. The final test is always held on a Sunday. I checked.”

  Sarah said, “If you’ll check your watch, you’ll see it’s after midnight. That makes it Sunday.”

  Nor looked unperturbed. “Forcing a participant to undergo a test while recovering from a big magic expenditure is also a violation of family law, as well as of the rules of the selection.”

  Sarah’s smile widened. I did my best not to cringe. She spread her arms, palms up, “I’m not forcing anyone to do anything. Finn is free to drop out and refuse the final test.”

  Nor looked like she was about to make another rebuttal, but Sarah held up a hand and said, “Meg took her final test at 12:01, while you were waiting in the other room. Once the final round of testing has begun, it must continue until all candidates have had a chance to complete it…or forfeit.”

  Sarah looked toward me, “I told you that we were both bound by the rules of selection once you began testing. I also told you that when you got to the final round, you would have a choice whether to continue or not. So here we are, it’s the last test. Choose. Continue or decline, it’s totally up to you.”

  Nor looked at Wil. He nodded slowly, “Those are the rules, yes.”

  Nor said, “A moment,” and walked back to me and nudged me away from them. We couldn’t really go very far, so we wound up clustered against the far wall. Right against the damn door.

  I eyeballed it. It didn’t look like anything special. It just looked like a door.

  Nor lowered her voice and said, “I’m out of options. If you want to go through with whatever this test is, then you need to know that you do so at significant risk to your health. I have no idea how much magic she’ll try to make you expend, but given the previous test, I have very real concerns. If you want to back out now, there’s no harm, no foul.”

  “Is there any way to find out what the stupid test is actually going to be?”

  “No. If there was, Wil would have known.”

  I sighed. I listened to the house around me. I could feel it waiting. Well, hell. I couldn’t let it down. I owed it to at least try to get to the end. If I passed this final test, then I could worry about whether I actually wanted to be housekeeper or not. I realized I at least wanted the option to make the decision myself, rather than forfeiting now. And to be honest, a part of me just wanted to give Sarah, Meg, and Doug a hard time. I’d about had it with all three of them.

  Nor nodded. “You don’t need to say it. I can see it on your face. Okay, you should know that I’ve put some protections in place to try to minimize whatever fallout occurs.”

  I nodded and looked at Sarah. Out loud I said, “Okay, let’s do it,” but my tone was “Bring it on, bitch.” I glanced to the right, and I could’ve sworn that that was admiration I saw flashing across the Real Girl’s face.

  Wil looked equal parts alarmed, curious, and cautious. Meg looked smug. Doug had a calculating look. And Sarah, well Sarah looked like I had just handed her a victory.

  I started to walk over to Sarah, but Nor stepped in front of me again. She said to Sarah, “You should be aware that while we were sequestered, I left word with my office that Finn has sustained a significant magic drain that resulted in unconsciousness and that she has possibly suffered damages that we haven’t had a chance to ascertain due to the conditions of the selection process. However, should Finn incur any further harm as part of the process, which, as you know is explicitly against family policy, then my firm is under orders to a) distribute the detailed account I sent them of the proceedings thus far to every member of the council and other parties whom I’ve selected, and b) they are to initiate an investigation with the intent of securing damages and/or filing charges for assault.”

  Meg looked at Doug. He shrugged. She looked at Sarah, who was having a staring contest with Nor. Sarah broke first.

  “I see. You made good use of the time you spent in the sitting room.” She turned to Wil. “And you, Wil? I’m assuming you’ve also made provisions?”

  Wil was all innocence when he said, “Of course, I’ve followed council policy and the protocol you put in place. All my notes, which I’ve been updating regularly on my phone, upload to the cloud. And, per policy, I have a program in place set to download them to various council members in the event of my disappearance or demise.”

  She looked at Lars. “You were right. I should have taken away their phones.” She sighed. “Well, what’s done is done.” She looked at Nor. “What do you want?”

  “We want to act as witnesses. Whatever you have planned next, if Finn decides to go through with it, Wil and I will act as witnesses.”

  I was feeling pretty good until Sarah smiled. “No problem,” she said. “In fact, I’ll even let you both participate.”

  Meg jostled Sarah, saying, “Sarah—”

  Sarah put up an arm and blocked Meg from pushing forward. “Stay where you are. It will be fine.” She looked at Nor. “Agreed?”

  Nor turned to Wil. “Wil?”

  “I’m in. But it’s up to Finn.”

  Nor walked the few steps to me and said, “Finn?”

  I nodded. “I’m in, too.”

  She looked at me intently and then gave me a tight smile and a nod. She turned to Sarah and said, “Agreed.”

  Sarah said, “Excellent. Let’s proceed.”

  Behind her, Meg looked like she was mentally rubbing her hands together. Doug looked satisfied. Did they really want me to fail that badly?

  I stepped forward with Nor and said, “Alrighty then. Let’s get this party started. What’s the test?”

  Sarah gave me a smile. “It’s simple really. I just want you to open that door.” She pointed to the door behind me.

  If I hadn’t already known that there was something unusual about the door, the look of joy on Meg’s face would’ve tipped me off.

  Nor murmured, “Are you all right?”

  I said, “I need a minute with Nor,” and grabbed her arm.

  We scooted as far away from them as we could get. I said, “I’m really sorry, I should have told you before. The door. It’s not what you think.”

  Nor said, “Short version?”

  I said, “I saw something. The door…it’s…something’s up.”

  I could see the wheels turning in Nor’s head, “So this is rigged.”

  I said, “Yeah, I think so.”

  Nor said, “I figured it must be, that’s why I hedged your bets the best I could.” She looked grim, “L
ook, bottom line…if you refuse, you’re out. If you stay, it could get ugly. Your choice. We’ll back you either way.”

  I rubbed my eyes. Well, I couldn’t abandon the house now.

  I turned to Sarah. “How far do I have to open it?”

  Sarah gave me a magnanimous smile. “Just a crack is fine.”

  I looked back at Nor and shrugged. “Yeah okay, let’s do it.”

  I knew that even a crack was going to be a stretch. It’d taken three people to open the door a crack the other night. I looked at Meg. I knew she couldn’t have gotten the door open on her own, so either she’d somehow cheated on her test, or Sarah had asked her to do something different. Then I had a really bad thought. What if Sarah hadn’t made her take another test at all? What if she was counting on me to fail so that Meg was the only candidate left standing?

  Sarah studied Nor and me and said, “You look a little worried. Really, there’s no reason to be. Here, I’ll show you.” She turned to Wil. “Wil, would you please open the door?”

  Wil froze. Slowly, he nodded. “Sure.”

  He walked to the door. He sized it up. Then, he put his hand on the knob.

  Beside me, Nor went still.

  You could’ve heard a mouse sneeze, it was so quiet in the hall.

  Wil turned the knob and opened the door.

  I whooshed out the breath that I’d been holding. The door opened easily. It didn’t even squeak.

  I peeked past Wil. Inside the door, there was a really dark closet. It extended to the right, under the stairs. Other than being in dire need of a lightbulb, there didn’t seem to be anything wrong with it.

  I wasn’t buying it. I’d seen the whole shenanigans with the damn door the other night.

  I shot a glance at Wil. Nothing seemed to be tickling his Spidey sense. On the contrary, from the set of his shoulders, I could tell that he was relieved.

  Not Nor, though. A glance at her told me she was still on alert.

  Sarah said, “Wil, if you’d shut the door please? Thank you. Now you try, Nor.”

  Nor frowned, but she stepped forward, and without a pause opened the door.

  Same thing as Wil. It opened easily, and we got a glance of the closet. Nor closed the door. When she turned back toward me, a deep frown was marring her face.