by Desconhecido
Feelings floated back to the surface for what had been, and anger for what couldn’t be. And then there was her emotional and physical attachment to Vek. She couldn’t deny any longer she had feelings for him. But how deep were they? And did he feel the same towards her? Only knowing the look on Shaja’s face would tell her the truth. For she needed to know how Zi-Den had changed, and whether he loved Shaja, as much as he once love her.
Having a son by her would bring the two closer. A child who held the key to all their lives in his hands. A key that would calm the frustrations and fix the past, she felt. Would Vek return to Shaja, or would he return with her to Auck? And did she want Zi-Den back in her life again? She didn’t think she could take him away from his wife, or the son he claimed, though not biologically his own. She didn’t want to disrupt the boy’s life, but knew she had to go—if for no other reason than to help her dearest friend through his troubles, and perhaps put an end to the feelings that haunted her from the past.
The frustrations of so many unanswered questions didn’t allow her to fall asleep quickly, and once she did, her sleep was filled with troubled images.
Chapter Five
For the first two days of the journey, Letha stayed to herself away from the men. She kept her bedroll nearby, but trekked in silence along them. Occasionally she’d speak a word to them, and saw Vek and Zi-Den conversing, but still kept to herself mainly, just as Hajin did. The weather and fortunately the wildlife and such hadn’t halted their steady course towards Strank. Come the third day of their journey they saw storm clouds in the sky. They were near the start of the mountains when a slight drizzle hit them. Hajin found the caves they could stay in for the last part of their journey. As it was still late afternoon, he took his leave of them, knowing they could make the rest of their journey on their own. But he had to get to his next client before the weather turned severe. Hajin didn’t use those new powered scooters, land bikes as they called them, since there were not good smooth trails in the Betweenlands; nor were there any spots a flying vessel could make a safe landing, even a small airship.
She’d been in the small section of caves the first time she crossed the Between-lands to go to Auck. Her late parents had been in the enforcement business and Major-Sheriff Braden had once been a friend of theirs, which is why she’d gone to Auck after she divorced Zi-Den. She’d been there ever since and knew she didn’t regret the training her old family friend had given her or a purpose again in life. Auck was her life and once Letha felt she straightened out the haunts of her past, she was bent on returning to her life there. Now she just wanted to rest a bit before they ventured the last half-day journey toward Strank.
Vek suggested as much, that they rest in the caves for a short while, to make sure the weather didn’t worsen. Unfortunately, it did within an hour after they stopped in the caves for a rest break. It poured down and a storm hit them fiercely within another hour after that. With groans from the three, they knew they’d have to camp for the night and continue their trek the next day early, should the weather permit.
Letha made her bedding close to the fire they built but far enough a way from the men. She didn’t intend to make chit-chat with them any more tonight than she had the last few days on the journey. Even though she missed Vek’s closeness, he hadn’t seemed to mind and didn’t go out of his way to pull her into a conversation or his arms. Not that circumstances allowed them closeness. But neither had Zi-Den for which she was glad. She’d thought about him a lot off and on during the trek and also Vek. Yet, until she knew what they both were going to do, her plans for life were on hold. She sighed, knowing that tonight she might have to talk with them.
There were things she needed to know, she supposed. Like what to expect from others upon their return. Zi-Den needed to catch them up on what went on in Strank and with his social life in order for her and Vek to be able to somewhat fit in to a society they hadn’t been around for many years. Once the fire was going, the three sat around the campfire, listening to the rain fall steadily and heavily outside the cavern. They had a partial view of it not hidden behind some boulder near the cavern’s opening.
After they’d eaten, refreshed, and tossed their bits of their meal remains into the fire, she sat staring at the fire and then felt Vek move closer to her. She briefly glanced at him then curled her arms around her feet, waiting for him to speak or just sit with her in companionable silence. His nearness brought warmth in two ways, comforting warmth from the slight chill outside and needful heat for which her body cried out. She’d missed their lovemaking and they hadn’t gotten that close since a few days before they started this journey.
Inwardly she was in turmoil but tried to stay calm and decisive. Having both men near her wasn’t helping in some ways, but it was out of necessity they had to be around each other. None had yet voiced what was on their minds. Perhaps they were waiting for her to open up. She wasn’t sure if that was true or not, but she knew she had to know what to expect upon their return to Strank. Decision made she glanced from Vek to Zi-Den, who looked surprised she would even deign to.
“We need to talk about what’s been going on since Vek and I left. Has society changed any, Zi-Den. Will either of us look like social misfits? You haven’t told us about how both your parents are accepting all this?”
He played with a stick at his feet for a few seconds, then crossed his ankles and hugged his knees before he answered her. He glanced first at Vek then her. “My parents were sticklers back then, Letha, and our society wasn’t too accepting of non-full weres marrying and interbreeding. It’s more customary now to see it. Some of the old ways are not completely gone but more acceptance is there. Shaja and I don’t socialize a lot unless it deals with Thane or the occasional visit from our parents. Both our parents dote on him.”
“They know I’m his biological father?” Vek asked.
Zi-Den nodded. “With him being so ill we had to tell them. They’ve done all they could to support us through his illness and know I’ve come to bring you back. I don’t think they expected you, Letha.”
“I’ve come to lend a close friend my support. That good enough for you and them?” She almost snarled then became tight-lipped. “I didn’t mean to sound harsh. What’s past is past, Zi-Den.” She quickly stood up. “I need to take care of a personal issue. Excuse me.”
The two men watched her leave before turning to look at one another again.
“You’re more than a friend to her, Vek, even if neither of you realize it completely.”
“That’s for her to decide,” Vek stated flatly. “And perhaps you.”
Zi-Den tilted his head to one side. “I’m married, Vek. And that depends on you and Shaja of course if she and I stay that way.”
Vek wasn’t sure what to make of the man’s counter words. “It’s a messy deal all the way around. Were you really surprised to find her in Auck? How hard did you try to find her?”
“I was lousy in what I did, but I can’t change the past, nor can you.”
Vek picked up a pebble and threw it into the fire. “Yeah, neither of us can. Like you said, Shaja is your wife. Letha is another matter, and that’s between me and her. Butt out.”
“I can say the same to you, but again that’s an entirely different matter too.”
He stood up but kept his eyes on Zi-Den. “Yeah, it is. Get some rest, we continue on tomorrow.”
“You two had better do the same.” Zi-Den arose and walked away from Vek.
Vek let out a gruff harrumph and went in the direction Letha had taken.
* * * *
Letha walked to the cavern pool not far from their encampment, that she’d found on an earlier excursion today. She pulled off her sockettes and low-heel boots and tentatively stuck one foot in the water. It felt cool and refreshing. Though it might still be a bit chilly outside, the temperature in the cavern was slightly dry and faintly warm in spots. It wasn’t a deep hole, but enough she knew she could sit in and wash the dust off of her
. She glanced around making sure the men hadn’t followed her, then ventured to take the rest of her clothing off. First her jacket, then her shirt and pants. She hadn’t worn anything else beneath her clothing, she liked going as natural as possible.
Sliding down into a sitting position into the pool, she closed her eyes and enjoyed the silence around her, other than her heart thumping loudly, echoing into the stillness of the small cavern. She sighed and slid further into the pool, half lying on her side. She let her shoulder-length hair sway into the water and shifted her head to lie lightly against the rocky embankment. It felt good and relaxing and she made her inner being relax with the flow of the water.
Then she smelled him. Vek. He’d walked so softly, had always really for such a big man. She didn’t have to look up to know he stood near the pool, waiting, watching her. Slowly she turned her head to view him. His eyes flittered, taking in her nakedness, and yet he scrutinized her. She did not want to try to read his emotions, and closed her own to him. He tilted his head to one side and knelt beside her. She slowly sat up but did not reach out for him.
“You have something to say?”
“You were a little hard on him, Letha.”
She shrugged. “We’ve all been tense lately.”
“Why did you truly come on this journey?”
“For you, Vek.”
“Why?”
She shrugged again. “Does it matter?”
“Yeah, it does.”
“We’re friends, Vek. I’m here for moral and emotional support.”
“And you had to see for yourself didn’t you?”
She stood up on her knees, so very close to him. “Yeah, I did. See how you react with her, see your son. A part of you is in Strank, perhaps always will be. But that’s something that can’t be helped.”
“No, it can’t be.” He reached out and stroked her cheek. “But what we have is special too, Letha. Never forget that.”
She didn’t reply as he studied her face seriously. Then suddenly, without another word, he stood up and walked away from her. Letha slumped back down into the pool. She let out a soft groan and slid fully under the water. It wasn’t until much later that she got out of the pool, shook herself dry as possible and put her clothing back on. The fire was still going when she returned to the campsite, but both men were quietly laying in their bedding, neither looking at the other. She hoped they were asleep, but doubted it as she got quickly into her own bedroll. Its thickness warmed her quickly and she closed her eyes, her tired mind letting her finally rest for the night.
* * * *
Vek knew it would be hard on them all, but it was something each of them had to deal with in their own way. In the long run, he knew it was best she came with them on this journey. Both of them had their emotional ghosts to dissipate, and find out where their hearts truly lay. He knew until then, he wouldn’t touch her body again. He’d given her an opening earlier but she hadn’t responded. He ached with need for her, but so did his heart. But right now his main concern was to focus on a son he did not know.
How could he become part of a child’s life that did not know him? Would the boy even want to? The thought both saddened and strengthened his resolve to do what he needed to do to save the child’s life. He owed Zi-Den, Thane, and Shaja that much, and Letha too. They were all thrust together by circumstances not of their own choosing. But when his son was safe, there were choices that had to be made.
His son. The thought both scared him and made him proud. He wanted to know Thane and wished he had sooner. He respected Zi-Den for coming and for looking for him. Had Shaja wanted this? Even though the child needed his blood, his genetic makeup too? He hoped so on several levels. They’d conceived a child from love…but was that love still there?
The thought shook him explosively and sadly at the same time. What would he feel for Shaja when he saw her again? Yes, he was curious. He wanted to know what she looked like, what her feelings for him were now? Should anything of what they had still linger in her heart? Did she want him in her life and in her heart once more?
Now he understood what Zi-Den and Letha were going through. Damn this was all a fucking mess in several ways for them all. What would they do once Thane got better? He sighed, knowing he’d find out soon enough…
* * * *
Zi-Den heard their light tossing in their bedrolls as the two tried to fall asleep. He wasn’t doing much better himself. Tomorrow would be their near-journey’s end. At least the one to get to Strank. But emotionally, more angst for them all was sure to follow.
Did Shaja know what it would truly bring upon them all? They’d only briefly talked about things. But what did she truly feel inside her heart. Would she want Vek again? Want the man in her son’s life. His son. Thane was his son too. He couldn’t let Vek take him from Shaja or their home. Yet he’d seen no intent to do so from Vek. They’d only known each other a short time, but he sensed the other were was honorable. He could not doubt the other man unless he showed otherwise.
He would not cause trouble for Shaja either. He cared too much for her and wanted her to be happy, no matter what it took from him. These sudden thoughts, these deep ones perturbed him. Besides saving Thane’s life, what had he brought upon them all?
His thoughts were mainly on Shaja, not Letha lately. But she had occupied part of them. She’d kept to herself during the trek from Auck to Strank, but he felt her eyes upon him occasionally. Did she once think back to what they use to have? To the love they once shared? Or of what might have been had he not caved in to his parents’ wishes? He knew the two of them needed to talk and once Thane was safe, he would do just that. Their lives had to get untangled and shadows of the past dissolved.
Thumping his bed pillow into place Zi-Den grumbled mentally about the damn mess things were in for all of them right now. He had to make himself get some rest, for tomorrow would be a physical end to their journey from Auck to Strank. He’d see his family again, and make damn sure all loose ends were tied up, too.
Chapter Six
“He’ll live through it fine. The genes from both parents are meshing well, he should be able to shift. Time will tell,” the doctors had told them after Thane’s operation.
Within a day and half after their arrival, the procedure took place, much to everyone’s relief. Things had been so tense since they left the caverns, Vek felt that a sharp knife couldn’t have cut through it all. But it was done, his son would grow up to be a full were-shifter. He couldn’t have wanted any thing more than that right now.
They’d made it into Strank in less than half a day, where they’d gone straight to Shaja’s and Zi-Den’s home once they took a travel-cart through the city, most dwellers used to get from one side of the large metropolis to the other. His home stood tall like the rest of the stone structures of the large were-city. Once inside, Zi-Den suggested they take time to rest and clean up from their journey. A servant in Zi-Den’s household informed them that Shaja was at the hospital visiting Thane, before he had shown them to their rooms where they could clean up and rest. It had actually been the next morning after an early morning repast that Vek saw his old flame again, after so many years of being away from her.
He and Letha were shown to a small drawing room, where he figured they occasionally entertained guests or had social gathers, from the looks of the nicely decorated room. Zi-Den and she rose when the two of them entered. It was almost as if time stood still when he glanced upon her. A petite slender woman, she still had long dark blonde hair in her human form. She viewed him with her lovely and sad brown eyes. He once remembered how they sparkled but he supposed stress and worry over their son had dulled her once lively sparkle.
“I’m glad Zi-Den found you and you came, Vek. Thank you.”
He didn’t near her but nodded. “It came as a bit of a shock to know we had a child. Zi-Den explained that to me.” He’d noted her flickering glances at Letha. Zi-Den had obviously told her Letha had accompanied them on the trek, but h
ad introduced them when the two entered the room.
“I hope your son is better very soon,” Letha stated softly, and who had been summing up Shaja.
“Thank you, Letha.” Shaja tightened her hands together.
“We’ll leave for the hospital shortly and you can meet with him, Vek,” Zi-Den said.
“I wish to be there for moral support if you do not mind.”
Vek noticed the furtive glances between Zi-Den and his wife. “I would not mind her there, if you both will allow it. Letha knows my medical history better than anyone, should the need arise for anything.”
“There’s no problem with her being there,” Shaja interjected. “I’m glad all of you had a safe journey here. If you’ll come with us then, we’ll head out and get you acquainted with Thane and his doctors.”
Hours later he’d talked to the boy, who resembled both him and Shaja, yet he’d felt awkward around him. And both Zi-Den and Shaja fawned over the child, as real parents would. Though the boy gave him curios glances, Vek knew Thane loved the two. An intelligent-looking were-kid, Thane was aware of the circumstances and his true parentage—Zi-Den had told Vek he’d been honest with the child. Vek was glad of that.
Maybe he was the biological father, but deep down, he felt Zi-Den had done a good job of raising the child. He realized it would be best if that didn’t change. Even feeling this, he wanted to do what he could to help the child recover from his illness. Within a few more hours then, after meeting Thane and talking with the doctors, Vek was prepped for the procedure.
He was more than glad Letha had accompanied them to the hospital.
* * * *
Shaja put a hand on her husband’s shoulder as they stood looking over their sleeping son. He reached down and squeezed her hand then turned to pull her into his arms, hugging her tight. She slipped her arms around him and held on to him dearly.
“They said it was successful and he’d pull through.” Zi-Den stroked her lush hair. “We can be relieved now, Shaja.”