DANIEL'S GIRL: ROMANCING AN OLDER MAN
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Daniel turned down a long, wooded, dark road that led to a small log cabin by the lake. The lake was beautiful to Nikki, and so peaceful that just seeing it helped to calm her down. Daniel looked out at the lake too, as if he needed its’ calming force just as badly as Nikki, and then he got out of the car.
Nikki leaned back and watched him as he walked slowly around the front of the car, his suit coat flapping with the heavy winds, his every step-down appearing to confirm just how gut-wrenching his thought processes were, and she kept watching him as he opened the passenger door. He then reached out his hand. She stepped out of the car, but she did not touch his hand.
Daniel glared at Nikki as she stepped out, but he was determined to keep his cool. He closed the door behind her and did not hesitate. He began walking toward the lake. Nikki stood by the car, but then felt foolish and followed him.
He stood at the shoreline, where the water rammed up on the top of his dress shoes and then backed off, and Nikki stood beside him. He looked at her, as her arms were folded and her hair blew back with the wind, and he took off his suit coat and placed it across her shoulders. She wrapped herself in the coat that seemed to swallow her, and then she looked at him.
“Was that woman telling me the truth?” she asked, desperately seeking some special words that could take away the ache that had settled deep inside of her.
But Daniel, as she should have expected, wouldn’t cooperate that easily. He seemed less concerned about some woman calling Nikki, and more concerned about Nikki’s reaction to that call.
“You’ve got to learn to trust me, Nikki,” he said almost as if it were a warning. “You have got to have enough confidence in me to know what I will and will not do.”
“But is it true?”
Daniel frowned. “Did you hear me? Did you hear a word I just said? Your behavior is destroying our relationship, and you’d better understand that.”
Nikki looked out across the dark lake again, as the wind caused it to ripple, and she knew she couldn’t do it anymore. Somebody called her and told her either the truth or lies today and Daniel telling her to just blindly trust him, without him even bothering to tell her what was going on, wasn’t enough for her. Not anymore. She lived her life believing in truth, in following the facts, not the emotion, not the fiction, not that blind kind of lovesick loyalty she’d been displaying ever since she hooked up with him.
“Tell me what’s going on, Daniel,” she said to him. “Tell me what’s happening.”
He released a long-winded sigh, as if he’d had it up to here. “Nothing’s happening, Nikki.”
“But why would a woman call me, out of the clear blue sky, if something wasn’t up? Why would she send you those naked photos? Why would she just call me like that, Daniel?”
“How am I supposed to know why some woman would call you?”
“But she knew about us. She knew about the trips you took. She knew that you brought me that townhouse. She knew that you left me at that hospital. This isn’t some casual bitch playing games, Daniel. She knew too much.”
Daniel exhaled. Then he looked at her. And she was right. She deserved his answers, not his platitudes. “I haven’t been in any five year relationship with some female. She’s lying.”
“Has any woman ever gone on a business trip with you?”
“No. She’s lying.”
“So what you’re telling me is that you’ve never been with another woman since you’ve been with me? Is that what you’re telling me?”
“I’m telling you that the woman who phoned you today was lying. I’m telling you that those naked photographs were lies. That’s what I’m telling you. I’m in a relationship with you and nobody else. I love you and nobody else. I don’t know what more you want from me!”
Nikki could see his anguish, but that didn’t supplant hers. “But what do you want from me?” she asked him. “Do you want me to act like I didn’t get that phone call from that lady today, or that I didn’t see those photos three days ago? Do you want me to just turn a blind eye and close my ears and ignore it? She called me. I didn’t call her. This happened to me, I didn’t make this happen! And just telling me that you don’t know what’s going on isn’t gonna cut it this time. Not this time. I’m not like you, Daniel. People can’t just tell me something and I just . . .”
“And you just believe it? Is that what you were going to say, Nikki? That woman told you something. You believed her.”
Nikki stared at him. A woman called her on the phone claiming to be Daniel’s lover, and she believed her. Just like that. Those naked photos set it up, and that phone call drove it home. That was all it took. Words. Words from a stranger’s mouth. Yet every word this man that stood before her spoke, this good man, a man who cared enough to drive her far away from the maddening crowd, to get her to a place of calm, was questioned by her. She believed a stranger, some woman she’d never even met, and doubted her good man. She knew women were after him. She was no idiot. She knew he had to turn down offers daily. And he still came home to her.
And how could she prove a negative? How could she prove that he didn’t cheat, or that he didn’t ask the woman to marry him? She couldn’t prove it, and that woman undoubtedly knew she couldn’t.
The sorrow that Nikki felt, that she had so easily fallen into that old familiar trap, caused her to suddenly feel lightheaded, and foolish, and so damn green, and she couldn’t deal with it anymore. The tears that she declared were gone, returned. And she fell, this time, in Daniel’s arms.
The cabin was warm, as the wood crackled in the fireplace, and Nikki was lying in the soft bed. It was a sweet, rustic place, she thought, with brick-lined walls and a big, moose head hanging over the fireplace. She could have done without that ugly head to look at, but it fit the place. Hunting rifles were in a large, glass case and, oddly enough, given Daniel, a set of golf clubs were in a corner. The furnishings were all leather, all grayish brown and herculean, and the music in the background, jazz of course, relaxed Nikki even beyond what she earlier thought possible.
Daniel came to her with a cup of hot coffee. She sat up and rested her back against the headboard as she gladly took the coffee from his hands. He sat on the edge of the bed and then leaned his body over her legs, his arm resting on the other side of her, and smiled. “Still cold in here to you?”
“No, not at all. It feels great. What about you?”
“Me?”
“Yeah, you,” Nikki said. Daniel had not only put back on his suit coat but had on gloves as well.
Daniel looked down, at his suit coat. “I’m fine. I just as soon put it on than throw it over a chair.”
“That’s stupid.”
He smiled. “I know. But I’m glad you’re feeling better. You had the chills at one point. I don’t know. Sometimes that fireplace is enough. Sometimes it’s not.”
“It’s plenty tonight. But how did you find out about this place?” she asked, looking around. “It’s really cool. Really different. Who owns it?”
“I found it through my realtor. And I own it.”
Nikki was impressed. “Really?” She looked around again. “You have very good taste, Mr. Crane.”
“Thank-you,” Daniel said with a smile. He was so pleased to see her back to her old self again that he felt fortunate. “I thought it was a nice place.”
“How long have you owned it?”
“Oh, my. Long time. Almost six years. I rarely got a chance to use it so I started renting it out. Mainly to some of Dreeson’s out-of-town clients who want to experience something different. They like it here.”
“I think I love it here,” Nikki said gleefully. “It’s so peaceful.” Then she smiled. “When you die, can I have it?” she jokingly asked.
But Daniel wasn’t joking at all. “Yes,” he said.
“Oh, please. You aren’t leaving this place to me! You’re going to leave it to your relatives or to your favorite charity.”
Daniel stared in her big brown eye
s. “I’m leaving it to you,” he said. “It’s been arranged.”
Nikki paused. He couldn’t be serious. “Since when?”
“Since about two years ago. I got a chance to sit down with my attorney, and put it in writing.”
She couldn’t believe it. “You mean you actually have this written somewhere? That I get the cabin should something happen to you?”
“The cabin, the houses, the cars, the money.” He looked at Nikki. “Everything.”
Nikki shook her head. “I was just kidding, Daniel, what are you talking about? You don’t need any will. Why would you go and do all of that?”
“Preparation, honey,” Daniel said. Didn’t she realize how much she meant to him?
But he knew what was happening. She was having that crash moment.
“But why are you preparing so soon?” she asked him. “You’re fine! I was just playing around. Nothing’s gonna happen to you.”
Nikki could feel her heartbeat quicken. The idea that he would leave her all of his earthly possessions was remarkable to her. But it wasn’t the fact of what he had left her that had struck her so deeply, but the fact that one day he would, in fact, leave her. Or she would leave him. That death was as real at that moment in time as the breath she was breathing. And the idea that something could happen to Daniel, that he would no longer be a part of her life, stunned her. She had never even thought that it could be a possibility.
“You didn’t have to write a will,” she said. “You’re still a young man. Besides, nothing ever happens to people like you.”
“No, it doesn’t,” Daniel said. “Until it does. I wanted to be prepared, that’s all. Everything I have, goes to you. I don’t want any relatives fighting over anything of mine. It’s all yours. You have to be prepared.”
Nikki looked at the fire in the fireplace. And the remains of the day, from that mysterious phone call, to this realization that she would be a basket case, a shell of a human being, if something ever happened to Daniel, overwhelmed her.
And as if it had been begging for attention all along, she suddenly knew what she had to do.
Later that night, she didn’t snuggle next to Daniel the way she usually did, but lay away from him, her back to him, still thinking as she stared at the fire across the room. Daniel was surprised by her behavior, but he didn’t press the issue. He knew she was still reeling from that phone call, and from their conversation earlier.
He remembered when he added her. His attorney strongly advised against it. You don’t leave all of your earthly possessions to some girlfriend, he had said. And normally Daniel would have agreed. But he did it anyway.
“I want to apologize to you, Nikki,” he said.
Nikki hesitated. For having an affair? For what? “Apologize for what?” she asked him.
“For everything. The neglect, the way I’ve been treating you lately. Everything. I haven’t been as attentive as I should be. A girl your age needs attention. And I’m sorry some female called you. I don’t know who she is, or who she can be. I’ve had my people look into it, but they turned up nothing. But it’s not true, honey. I’m not having any affair with her, or with anyone else. You understand?”
Nikki frowned. Because it was different to her now. She wasn’t stuck on some phone call anymore. She was stuck on her very life right now, and how she planned to live it. Her reaction to that phone call was just a symptom, she felt, of a serious problem. She loved Daniel too much. He occupied too much of her entire existence. It wasn’t healthy for him, and it certainly wasn’t healthy for her.
She swallowed hard. “I think it’s a good idea, to tell you the truth,” she said.
Daniel looked at her, at her bare back, at her thin neck, at part of her brown, naked behind not hidden under the covers, and he swallowed hard too. “What’s a good idea?”
“Going slow. Not rushing into anything.”
Daniel hesitated. “You okay?”
“Yes. I’m fine. I just think . . .” She frowned. “I think you were right. We ought to take it slow.”
Daniel did not respond. He could tell she was emotional. She was finally reaching a conclusion he had reached a long time ago: she had to slow down. She had to stop believing that the very reason for her existence was completely tied to him. Or it would be. And when he was gone, when he was no longer on the scene for whatever reason, the foundation of her very existence would be shaken, to a point beyond devastation, maybe to a point beyond repair.
He reached over and placed his hand on her hip. She moved slightly away. “Good night, Daniel,” she said, through her fears. And he understood.
“Goodnight, love,” he said.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
The rains came with a thunderous clap and the huge Dreeson building went dark as the lights flicked out, and then came back on. It was eight at night and most of management was still in the building.
But Daniel was looking to get out.
He shoved files into his briefcase just in case he felt like reading over some of them at home, and began closing the flap. He was this close to a clean getaway. But Melanie, looking dashing in a loud lavender dress, walked in.
“Well,” he said, smiling, “looks like somebody’s going to have a big night tonight.”
“You like?” she said and turned around, as if she was a model on a runway.
“I like.”
She walked further into the office and sat down in front of Daniel’s desk. “I hope Edgar likes.”
“Edgar?”
“My date. I’m very hopeful.” She said this and looked up at Daniel. He stood behind his desk in shirt sleeves, his briefcase closed and standing on his desk. She wanted to see if there would even be a flicker of jealousy. There was.
“When did you meet this Edgar?” he asked her.
“A couple weeks ago. At a book store, can you believe it? He seems like a pretty decent guy.”
Daniel nodded. “You need to be careful, Mel. Everybody’s pretty decent when you don’t know them.”
Melanie smiled. “You aren’t worried about me. Are you?”
“You’re my assistant. Of course I worry about you. You’re a beautiful woman in this world. And susceptible to any smooth talker.”
“You mean like you?”
Daniel smiled. “Exactly,” he said.
“No, Daniel, I understand what you’re saying. I do. But I can’t spend another night alone. That’s what it’s come down to for me.” Daniel stared at his assistant. She crossed her legs. Daniel looked away.
“The reason I dropped by,” she said, “was to confirm that the New York trip was still on for tomorrow.”
“It’s still on. You and Max will accompany me, and I hope to wrap up the deal while we’re there.” Then he looked at her. “Please don’t tell me you can’t make it.”
“Oh, no, that’s not it at all. I’ll be there.”
Daniel was relieved. “Good. You and Max are the only two assistants I have on staff that are fully trained in the art of the deal. I’ll need you two to help work the room. The Japanese love to come in three different directions before they will agree. I want all of our bases covered. It’ll be the first time Dreeson has considered partnering with Japan. I want to get this right.”
“You will. You always do. No, I’ll be there. Don’t worry. It’s just that. . .” She exhaled. “I turned forty yesterday,” she said.
Daniel was surprised by this. “Yesterday was your birthday? Mel, why didn’t you tell me?”
“You have enough on your plate than to have to entertain me too. I’m sure Nikki would agree with that.”
“You should have told me, Mel,” he said.
“You’ve done more than enough. You’re already stretched too thin. Between all we have you doing here at Dreeson I’m sure it’s effected your personal life as it is, and your relationship with Nikki. I couldn’t bear to be responsible for any further problems.”
She was fishing. Luke had told her that lately Nikki seemed t
o be in the best spirits he’d seen her in months, as if she was resigned to something unpleasant, such as an eminent break-up with boyfriend, or something wonderful, such as a certain togetherness. But neither she nor Daniel were telling. And Melanie had been trying daily to get the scoop.
“So,” Melanie said, deciding to beat around the bush no longer. “How’s Nikki anyway?”
“She’s good.”
“So it worked out then?”
Daniel frowned. “What worked out?”
“I’m sorry. I assumed there was trouble in paradise. I hadn’t seen Nikki coming by the office to see you the way she used to.”
Daniel said nothing.
“So it worked out then, whatever it is?” Melanie asked again.
“Yes. It worked out,” Daniel said half-heartedly.
Melanie smiled. “You don’t sound too certain of that.”
“Do I? I mean, don’t I?”
Melanie couldn’t believe his lack of confidence. “Daniel? Are you okay?”
He exhaled and placed his hands on his hips. “I’m okay, Mel, thanks.”
“Is it Nikki?”
Daniel hesitated. He didn’t discuss his problems with anyone, not ever, but tonight he was tempted. “She’s had an epiphany,” he said.
Melanie smiled. “That sounds like Nikki. And what great discovery has she made?”
Daniel hesitated. “She loves me too much,” he said.
“She what?”
“She’s concluded that she loves me too much. So she wanted a little breathing room. I gave it to her.”
“So what you’re saying is that you and Nikki are no more? That you and Nikki are no longer a couple?”
“Of course that’s not what I’m saying.” Daniel said this with irritation in his voice. It was tough enough. “We’re still together,” he made clear. “We’ll always be together. She just wanted some space.”