Love Unspoken

by Carole Mortimer

Steve sighed. ‘Let’s discuss this when we gel back to your flat.’

  She had never seen Steve in this mood before, she was more used to the happy-go- lucky man who was always joking and teasing. Right now he was angry, furiously so, and Zack had caused that anger.

  ‘Would you like a coffee?’ she offered nervously once they reached her home.

  ‘No,’ he answered abruptly. ‘I want to know exactly what’s going on.’

  ‘Going on?’ she frowned. ‘I don’t understand.’

  ‘With Reedman,’ he growled. ‘Suddenly he’s there all the time—’

  ‘Twice,’ she reminded him huskily.

  ‘For me, yes. But how many times have you seen him? He was there that weekend you stayed at your friend’s house, he was in your flat when I arrived, and now he’s turned up at our restaurant—’

  ‘Hardly ours, Steve,’ she scorned. ‘It is open to the public you know.’

  ‘Not his sort of public,’ he scowled. ‘And how many other times have you see him that I don’t know about?’

  ‘None,’ she gasped.

  ‘The man acts as if he owns you!’

  ‘He did once. Remember?’ she said angrily.

  ‘And now? Does he own you now?’

  ‘Steve, please don’t do this to us,’ she pleaded.

  ‘I’m beginning to wonder if there is an us.’ He ran a weary hand through his dark hair. ‘Reedman is after you. And I don’t have any way of stopping him.’

  ‘You don’t have to stop him.”’ She touched his arm. ‘I don’t want him, and he certainly doesn’t want me. It was only politeness that made him come over to our table tonight.’

  ‘And was his conversation “polite”?’

  She looked away. ‘We talked about you actually.’

  ‘Me?’ he frowned. ‘What did you say?’

  ‘Not a lot,’ she shrugged. ‘You were only gone a few minutes, Steve. We couldn’t say much in that time.’

  He looked at her broodingly. ‘Are you seeing him again?’

  ‘Of course not.’

  ‘Julie, do you care for me at all?’ Steve looked at her with a desperate hunger.

  ‘You know I do—’

  ‘No, I don’t know,’ he shook his head, his expression pained. ‘I could tell you were going to say no to marriage, so I dropped that. This last month I’d hoped—well, I’d hoped things might get better between us.’

  ‘An affair, you mean,’ she said dully.

  ‘Anything! I was hoping for anything.’ He sighed wearily. ‘I can’t stand this much longer, Julie. I want you, you know that. The way you avoid anything physical between us is driving me mad!’

  ‘Steve-‘

  ‘No, don’t say anything.’ He moved to the door. ‘I’m reacting to my jealousy of Reedman. I’ll be all right tomorrow.’

  ‘Are you sure…?’

  ‘Yes.’ He gently touched her cheek. ‘Poor Julie, I do put you through it, don’t I?’

  ‘It’s my fault,’ she shook her head.

  ‘It’s no one’s fault,’ he assured her softly. ‘I’ll pick you up at seven tomorrow.’

  ‘If you would rather not go—’

  ‘I’m coming with you,’ he insisted firmly. ‘I’m certainly not losing you now. Besides, this invitation is an indication that I’m at last being accepted by your friends.’

  It was certainly that, although she had no idea how Ben was going to act towards Steve. It was all right making the grand gesture of the invitation, and she had heard nothing from Connie to the contrary of them staying overnight, but it was a different matter when faced with reality. She had warned Connie that Steve had no idea of her married status, but Ben could so easily give her secret away if he were so inclined.

  ‘You’re quiet,’ Steve remarked on the drive to Hampshire.

  She smiled. ‘Sorry.’

  ‘Not angry with me about last night, are you? I was acting like a bloody fool.’

  ‘Of course not,’ she assured him instantly. You had a right to be angry. But all that’s cleared up now, isn’t it?’

  ‘Reedman, you mean?’

  ‘Yes,’ she nodded, not wanting to get into a discussion about the progression of their own relationship. She had lain awake thinking about it all night, and she still didn’t know what they were going to do. Perhaps in all fairness she should stop seeing Steve altogether, give him the opportunity to find someone else, someone who could give him the love he wanted. And yet she couldn’t make that break, wanted his friendship if not his love.

  ‘Yes, it’s all cleared up,’ Steve turned to smile at her. ‘I just wasn’t seeing straight last night. Of course it was a coincidence Reedman turning up at Mario’s. He had his fiancee with him—’

  ‘Was she wearing a ring?’ Her voice was sharp.

  ‘Not that I noticed,’ he shrugged. ‘But you said he’s getting married, so I assumed that was her.’

  ‘I think it was,’ she nodded.

  ‘Well, if he’s after you he would hardly chase you in front of his future wife, now would he?’

  ‘No.’ But she wasn’t so sure Zack’s presence at Mario’s had been a coincidence. She had a nagging feeling in the back of her mind that he had known she was going to be there. The feeling had persisted during the night, and was still with her. Zack had shown no surprise at finding her there with Steve, had more or less come straight over to their table. No, she didn’t trust Zack’s motives at all.

  Connie opened the door to them herself, looking very beautiful in a midnight blue dress that matched the colour of her eyes. ‘Julie!’ her face lit up with pleasure as she hugged her. ‘And you must be Steve,’ she turned to greet him warmly. ‘You didn’t exaggerate, Julie,’ she teased. ‘He is gorgeous!’

  ‘Tell me more,’ he grinned.

  ‘Connie!’ she warned.

  ‘I think I’m going to like you,’ Steve smiled at Connie. ‘Maybe you could tell me later, when Julie’s not around, what else she says about me?’

  Connie laughed. ‘I wouldn’t want to inflate your ego that much.’

  Julie frowned as she watched her friend. She was acting the perfect hostess, giving their coats to the housekeeper, making sure their cases were taken upstairs, the bright smile never far from her lips, and yet Julie could sense the •.train about her, her gaiety brittle, fine lines In side her eyes and mouth. Connie was worried about something, she could see that.

  Maybe Ben had changed his mind about their being here? But surely if that were it Connie would have let her know. Then what was it?

  ‘Connie…?’

  Her friend chewed worriedly on her bottom lip. ‘I—er—Someone turned up unexpectedly—’

  ‘Me,’ said a quietly mocking voice from behind them.

  Julie could feel Steve tense at her side as they turned to face Zack. Her breath caught in her throat at how magnificent he looked in the black dinner suit. He wasn’t dressed any differently from Steve, the suit was more expensively cut probably, and yet he looked so much more distinguished, so completely dominating.

  ‘Isn’t this a nice surprise?’ he drawled tauntingly.

  ‘Er—let’s go through to the lounge,’ Connie suggested jerkily.

  ‘Yes, why don’t we,’ Zack agreed softly.

  ‘I’m so sorry,’ Connie muttered before following Zack through to the other room.

  ‘So am I,’ Steve muttered, looking accusingly at Julie. ‘Did you know he was going to be here?’

  ‘How could I?’

  ‘Quite easily, if you arranged last night to meet here,’ he said grimly.

  ‘Well, we didn’t,’ she sighed. ‘Now shall we join the others?’

  ‘Why not?’ he said bitterly, that reckless look back in his eyes.

  Julie almost came to a halt as they entered the lounge and saw the woman sitting on the arm of Zack’s chair. Teresa!

  Zack and Ben both stood up as she walked into the room, Zack’s expression mocking, Ben’s pleading. Poor Connie and Ben, they ha
d had no idea Zack was going to turn up here with Teresa. Well, she wasn’t going to make things more awkward for them than they already were. If Zack behaved himself the evening could still pass off smoothly. Although looking at that mocking glint in his eyes she didn’t think there was much chance of that!

  He put out a hand to help Teresa to her feet, making the introductions. ‘Teresa Barr. This is Julie, and her boy-friend Steve Carter.’

  She had been right last night in thinking Teresa was beautiful—she was. Standing only as high as Zack’s chin in her high heels she had what some men would call ‘the figure of a pocket Venus’, small and dainty, with hair like spun gold, the latter long and silky down her back. The black dress she wore emphasised her voluptuous figure, and she leant softly against Zack as his arm came about her waist to hold her at his side.

  Julie saw the gesture of possessiveness, and deliberately kept her expression bland. It didn’t bother her in the least that Zack was her£ with his girl-friend!

  Teresa was frowning now, her features small and doll-like. ‘Julie?’ she queried in a puzzled voice.

  At least three people in the room stopped breathing, although Julie could see Zack was perfectly in control, and Steve lived in ignorance of the significance of that one little question.

  Teresa looked up at Zack now. ‘Darling, is this-‘

  ‘My wife?’ he finished coolly. ‘Yes, Julie is my wife.’

  Why didn’t she faint, do something, anything, to escape the bombshell Zack had just deliberately dropped? Connie and Ben looked horrified, Teresa looked uncomfortable, and Steve looked completely stunned. And through it all Zack continued to look at her calmly, challengingly!

  CHAPTER 5

  How she got through the rest of the evening she never knew. Steve’s behaviour was quiet and sulky, Teresa’s somewhat embarrassed and uncomfortable, Connie and Ben were doing their best to keep a flagging conversation going. Only Zack seemed unconcerned, talking quite cheerfully, caring nothing for the fact that he received only Connie and Ben’s attention.

  After dinner was no better, although once again Zack seemed immune to the tension surrounding him, chatting amiably about world affairs and drawing a moody Steve into a conversation about the European media.

  Poor Steve! The shock on his face when Zack had said she was his wife—although to his credit he had quickly masked the emotion, and although he must be eaten up with anger at her he gave no indication that the marriage was news to him.

  But Zack knew damn well it was, he had gone out of his way to find out if Steve knew they were married! Steve’s claim that these meetings with Zack weren’t coincidental suddenly seemed a real possibility, and Julie wondered warily at his reason for wanting to cause trouble between herself and Steve.

  Because he was causing trouble, and he knew he was. His pleasant attitude wasn’t fooling her for a moment, and the glitter of satisfaction in his eyes told her that whatever he was up to he was succeeding.

  And he was drinking steadily, something she had never known him to do, despite Connie’s claim that he had begun to drink after their break-up. But he had been drinking wine with his meal, brandy afterwards, and now he was sipping liberally at large whiskies. She soon found out the reason for that!

  ‘Would you mind if Teresa and I stayed the night?’ he suddenly asked Connie. ‘I-‘

  ‘Only I think I’m probably over the limit,’ he added with one of his charming smiles. ‘And Teresa doesn’t drive at all.’

  Connie looked awkwardly at Julie, seeing the panic in her face. ‘Well, I—’

  ‘Don’t you have the room?’ he persisted.

  ‘Of course we have the room,’ Connie denied instantly. ‘And you know you’re quite welcome to stay, both you and Teresa.’

  ‘Maybe Steve and I should be the ones to leave,’ Julie said instantly, imagining nothing worse than having to get through a morning hi id lunch in this awkward atmosphere too.

  ‘Oh no, Julie,’ Connie looked at her pleadingly. ‘I’ve promised the children they’ll see you in the morning. Nicholas has talked of nothing else all day.’

  ‘And you should never disappoint a child,’ Zack drawled, watching Julie intently over the rim of his glass.

  She flushed, meeting the mockery of his gaze. The only child here at the moment was liim, and she had no idea what game he, was playing! ‘I have no intention of disappointing Nicholas,’ she said distantly. ‘I’m feeling tired, Connie, would you mind if I went to my room?’

  ‘Of course,’ Connie agreed instantly, standing up. ‘I’ll come with you, I have to tell Mrs Pearce to prepare the other two rooms.’

  ‘Steve?’ Julie looked at him anxiously. He had been drinking as much as Zack, although he looked much worse for it, a high flush to his cheeks, a glazed look to his eyes.

  ‘I’ll be up in a minute,’ he mumbled, taking another swallow of whisky.

  Connie looked at him worriedly. ‘I’ve put you in the room next to Julie.’

  ‘And will you put Teresa and me in adjoining rooms too?’ Zack taunted.

  ‘Zack-‘

  ‘Sorry,’ he muttered at his brother’s angry protest. ‘Sorry, Connie.’

  ‘That’s all right.’ She bit her lip, obviously unnerved by the strangeness of this situation.

  ‘Julie?’

  Julie followed her friend thankfully out of the room, although she wished Steve had come with her. She couldn’t help feeling as if she had left him to the wolves, although that was silly; Ben and Teresa weren’t antagonistic, in fact Teresa hadn’t had two words to say all evening.

  She couldn’t help liking the other girl, which was rather strange considering their situation. But she had found Teresa Barr to be as nice as Connie said she was, although a little on the shy side, and obviously deeply in love with Zack. And there lay the trouble as far as she could see. Zack certainly didn’t love Teresa. He treated her with amused indulgence while she could only look on adoringly, and Julie could see that he would be bored with such a wife within six months.

  As he had been bored with her? No, never bored. There had never been boredom between them—love, hate, but never ever boredom.

  But there would have been eventually, she knew that. It wasn’t in a man’s nature to be faithful to one woman; she had learnt that from a master.

  ‘Whew!’ Connie heaved a sigh of relief as she dosed the lounge door behind them. ‘What a disaster of an evening!’

  Julie grimaced. ‘I can’t disagree with that.’

  ‘I’m so sorry,’ Connie pulled a face. ‘I had no idea Zack and Teresa were going to turn up in that way. He didn’t say anything about it when he called this morning—’

  ‘Zack telephoned this morning?’ she said sharply.

  ‘Mm, just for a chat.’ Connie led the way upstairs. ‘He didn’t say anything about coming here tonight.’

  ‘No, he wouldn’t have done,’ Julie said dully, remembering another time when Zack had forced his personality on her in this way, that time with telephone calls. He was definitely up to something—but what?

  Connie turned to look at her. ‘You don’t sound surprised.’

  ‘Somehow I’m not.’ Julie followed her friend into the bedroom. ‘Zack’s playing a little game no one else understands. When he’s ready to he’ll let us know what it is.’

  Connie sat down on the bed. ‘Do you think it could have anything to do with the divorce?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ Julie shrugged. ‘I’ve already agreed to it, I don’t see what else I can do ‘

  ‘Neither do I.’ Her friend stood wearily to her feet. ‘I’d better go and arrange the rooms.’

  ‘Are “rooms” necessary?’ Julie responded

  ‘They are here,’ Connie nodded. ‘What Zack does in London is his affair, here he abides by our rules.’

  ‘You never used to be such a prude,’ she teased, remembering the night Connie and Ben had spent at their flat, together, before they were married.

  ‘Put it down t
o old age! Now I really had better go and sort out their rooms. What a night!’ and Connie left the room with a disgusted grimace.

  What a night indeed! And it hadn’t ended yet. She had washed and changed into her nightgown, a flowing silky green affair, when the knock sounded softly on her bedroom door.

  ‘Yes?’ she queried in a whisper, aware that everyone had come up to bed about five minutes ago.

  ‘It’s Steve. Let me in,’ he muttered.

  She quickly opened the door, closing it again as he pushed inside without being asked. He was angry, furiously so, and in the circumstances he had a right to be.

  ‘Just when did you intend telling me that that gem?’ he didn’t waste any time.

  ‘Steve—’

  ‘ You’re actually married to that man,’ he accused. ‘Married to Zachary Reedman!’

  ‘It was years ago—’

  ‘You’re still married to him!’

  ‘Not for much longer, we’re getting a divorce.’

  ‘Dear God, Julie, why couldn’t you have told me?’

  He sat down on the bed with a groan, burying his face in his hands. ‘Everyone thought you’d had an affair with him, but you and he were actually married! Why the secrecy, Julie? Didn’t the great Zachary Reedman want it known he was married to a mere reporter?’

  ‘It was my idea,’ she choked. ‘Mine and mine alone. Zack never liked it. But I—I thought it might hinder my career—’

  ‘Hinder it?’ he scorned. ‘I should think it would have done the opposite!’

  ‘I never wanted Zack’s reflected glory!’

  ‘God, I just—I can’t—How could you let me find out that way?’ he looked at her accusingly. ‘No wonder you didn’t want to marry me— you were already married to him!’

  ‘I told you, we’re getting a divorce.’

  ‘And is that supposed to make me feel better?’ he rasped angrily.

  ‘Steve, I’m so sorry.’

  ‘So am I. I loved you, you know.’

  ‘Loved…’

  ‘Yes,’ he gave a derisive laugh. ‘But now I know that you cared nothing for me. You didn’t even trust me enough to tell me you’re- married. I feel betrayed, Julie.’

  ‘I only ever wanted friendship, Steve,’ she said chokingly. ‘I told you that in the beginning.’