The pain in his eyes, his whole demeanor pushed her to ask, “Bam, have you found your Mate?” At first, she thought he wouldn’t answer, but when he did, she almost wished he hadn’t.
He shook his head slowly, “I’m not enough.”
“Bam, that’s not true…”
He cut her off by shaking his head vigorously, looking her directly in the eyes, telling her with his eyes not to continue. She stopped. They sat in the quiet for a while. Bane sat on the edge of the trees, tears in his eyes, wanting to be there with the two most important people in his life. His Mate and his brother. Both were in need of his support. And he was pussying out because she had called him a monster, but he had felt it to his core. He had some of the same issues that Bam did, not thinking he was enough. He’d always thought that she’d be the one person to accept him unconditionally. And she’d rejected him. He was hurt, butt-hurt.
“Back at the house, when we were having breakfast with everyone, you said I was Bane’s Ever. What’s an Ever?”
“Mate. I just always said Ever when I was a kid, like you found your Forever. It kind of stuck. When I used to think I’d have one, too, I always thought that she’d call me her Ever and that’s how I’d know she was my One.”
“Bam. You are going to find your Ever, too. You are such a great guy,” she reached out to place her hand on his shoulder.
He looked her in the eye, “Don’t have one,” and stood so quickly she flinched. He started for the trees.
“Wait, where are you going?”
“Home. Bane will come for you.”
“But…,” she didn’t finish. He was already striding through the trees, and she couldn’t see him anymore.
Bam stalked into the trees straight at Bane. When he got to him, he kept walking, until chest-to-chest, pressed together, he shoved Bane into the tree directly behind where he was hiding, a low snarl constant in his chest, “Go. Get. Your. Ever.”
“She doesn't want us.”
Bam looked at him for enough time for it to become uncomfortable.
“She can’t accept us, she said we are monsters. I’m only doing what she wants, staying away.”
Bane’s Bear whispered , “You pussy!” in his head.
Bam continued to stare at him, his chest pressed to Bane’s. Then he turned abruptly and walked away. Before he was totally out of sight, he said, “He’s right. You are a pussy.” And then he was gone.
Bane stood there, open-mouthed. His brother, the one he had always believed needed his care, had just called him a pussy. And chested up to him. The fuck just happened? How the hell did he know what you said? He thought to Bear.
Brother Bear very smart. You pussy, his Bear answered.
“Hello? Bam? Anybody?”
Janie was calling for anyone to come to her. She was out in the woods. By herself. Bam had left her there and it was up to Bane to go to her.
Mate not afraid of Bam. Bam Bear bigger than you. No monster. You pussy.
Bear’s thoughts brought him up short. She’d spent the whole day with Bam and she’d been fine. She hadn’t been afraid. She’d not called him a monster. She’d tried to soothe him when he’d been upset.
Pus, Bear started, and Bane cut him off. You call me a pussy again, and I swear to God I will have Avaleigh shave you bald. Your entire fucking body. Bald. Except for your fuzzy little tail, and fluff around your paws. Like a huge ass poodle. He wasn’t sure if Bear believed him or not, but he shut the hell up, and that was the point anyway.
He started toward the creek, just as Janie started toward the trees where Bam had disappeared. She was only about halfway there when somebody came out of the trees and started toward her. It took her only a split second to realize that it was Bane. She lost all sense of self. All she knew was that she needed Bane. She ran. She ran like she’d never run before in her life, and as she got closer to him, he paused in his steps to watch her. When she was only a few steps from him, she launched herself through the air at him. He caught her and tried to pull his head back to look at her, but couldn’t because she had her face buried in his neck, and she was crying. Her arms wrapped around his neck as tightly as she could get them. He had wanted to try to talk to her, see what she wanted to do, but it didn’t look like that was going to happen. Bane tentatively wrapped first one arm around her, then the other, afraid she’d reject him again. As she settled even deeper into his arms, he gave in and tightened his arms around her, turned his face into her hair, her neck, breathed in the scent of his Mate, and held on.
Chapter 15
After a while her tears stopped and turned into sniffles, which she wiped on his shirt. And Bane didn’t give one single fuck that she was wiping her nose on his shirt. His Mate was in his arms, and that was all that mattered. But they still had so much to talk about. She was young, so young. And the whole shifter thing, it had really freaked her out. He needed to be sure that she understood everything that she was to him. That there was no going back for him, if they did this. He was all in, but she might need time…
It was as though she could hear his mind churning. She pushed herself back from his chest, Bane still holding her ass and back, her legs still wrapped around his waist. She placed a hand on his cheek, “Mate?”
He was stunned. She was asking if he was her Mate. “Yes. But…”
“No. No but’s. You said yes.”
“We need to talk.”
“NO! Just listen, I need to explain what happened. I would never have walked away from you, but my mother was in danger.”
“I know, Janie. She told me. I understand. But there is still so much,”
“Do you not want me anymore? Can you not forgive me?”
“I do forgive you. I said I understand. But you’re so young, Janie. You can’t be more than 20. This is for life. There is no going back. It’s not like marriage, and you can just get a divorce if you change your mind. You need to be sure this time.”
Her head pulled back a little at his words, like he had slapped her. “Okay. I guess I deserved that after the way I hurt you. But I’m not going to change my mind. I was sure then, and I’m sure now. I want you. Only you. And just for the record, I’m 24.”
“You didn’t trust me to take care of you. You didn’t even give me the chance, Janie. If there is trouble again…”
“I had lived with my father and his terror all my life. The last thing I wanted to do was to expose you to his rage. I didn’t know what you are. I was afraid he or some of his friends would hurt you. I could survive alone. I’d be miserable, but survive. But I would die if anything ever happened to you. I was trying to protect both my mother and you.” She leaned in and kissed his lips very gently. “I love you, Bane. Always have. Please give me another chance.”
His heart thundered. She loved him. He’d heard the words and was stunned. He just stood there, holding her, looking at her perfect little face.
“Bane?” Her eyes were starting to fill with tears again. “Please, Bane.”
There was no way he could deny her anything, ever. She’d crushed him, but she was also the only one who’d ever brought him to life.
He leaned his head forward at the same time he tightened his arms, bringing her face closer to his. He pressed his forehead gently against hers, “Love you, Mate,” he whispered to her. Her face squenched up, and the tears started again, but happy tears this time, “I love you, too. Don’t ever let me go.”
He offered her a small smile, a sheen in his eyes, also, “Never going to happen, my Heart.” Bear was purring and chuffing, making Bane rub his nose all over her cheeks, her hair, leaving his scent all over her.
“Is that your Bear?”
Bane nodded, “Yeah, he’s happy. He’s growly, but it’s a good growly, don’t be afraid.”
“I’m not. Can I see him?”
Bane hesitated. The last time she’d freaked out. “You sure, Heart? I just got you back; I don’t want to scare you again.” He brushed a stray hair from her face and tucked
it behind her ear. “I never want you to fear me.”
She nodded excitedly, “I want to meet him.”
He sighed, “Okay, come on,” he took her hand and started toward the middle of the clearing, nearer the creek. “But please, Janie. Don’t freak out. It’s me, even when I’m Bear. I know who you are. I am capable of intelligent thought. I just have a different body. Okay?”
He walked her to a point near the middle of the clearing and let go of her hand. He took three or four steps back and started stripping out of his clothes. Janie watched, her mouth dry, other parts of her wet and pulsating as he stripped off his boxer briefs and stood before her completely nude. “You are beautiful, Bane. Perfect,” she whispered to him. He offered her a tenuous smile, nervous about her reaction to Bear. He threw his head back, stretched his arms and legs, flexing every muscle in his body, and after a series of snaps and pops, it happened so fast that her human eyes couldn't even follow the progression. Then, standing there before her was a huge, black Bear. He just stood there and watched her. When she didn't make any move to come toward him, he slowly, deliberately sat back on his haunches, like a dog. Then he grinned at her. She let out a string of giggles. It was the silliest thing she had ever seen. This Bear was actually grinning at her. He let out a breath he didn't even realize he’d been holding, his Mate was giggling at his Bear. She approached him slowly, hand outstretched, as she would a stray dog. “Hi, big boy, you are beautiful, too.” She told him. His Bear was still holding perfectly still, but preening inside at her praise. Then Bear stretched his neck to force her hand to make contact with his snout. Don’t frighten her, Bear, Bane hurriedly thought to him.
You hush, I beautiful. Mate say so.
“Wow, you are so…, magnificent.” Bear preened even more, ducking his head down for Janie to get the message to pet him. This time she gave him a true belly laugh. Petting him, scratching his ears, wrapping her arms around him and snuggling him against her breast. “I love you, Mate,” she whispered to him. She kissed his snout, then asked for Bane.
“Can I have Bane again?” Bear licked her entire face, chin to temple, backed up a few feet and shifted back into Bane.
“Hi, Baby,” she told him.
“Hi, Heart,” he answered.
She walked over to him, slowly, pulling her shirt over her head as she went, dropping it on the ground as she continued toward him. His heart was pounding out of his chest. His Mate was topless, coming toward him, and the look in her eye did not say innocent. It screamed of want, of need. She hooked her thumbs in the waist band of her sweats and panties and started pushing them off. She paused long enough to kick out of them; then, she was moving toward him again. In the few seconds it took to get to him, he was rock hard. Pounding. Swollen so big that surely his skin would tear. Upon reaching him, she pressed her entire body against the length of his, reached up on tiptoe while wrapping her hands in his hair and pulled his lips down to hers. Just before she kissed him she whispered, “Take me. Teach me, Bane. Make me yours.” And he was lost. He crushed his lips down onto hers, consumed her. He wrapped his arms around her and covered her mouth with his. His tongue caressing, tasting, tempting her own mouth to kiss his. She moaned at the taste of him, and the feeling of sheer power that radiated from his body as he learned hers. He lifted her from the ground and she wrapped her legs around his waist before he dropped to the grass on his knees. He gently laid her back on the grass and unwrapped her legs from around his waist. Her ass was resting against his knees where he knelt right in front of her. He held her ankles as he pushed her knees back toward her shoulders, and met her eyes before looking down her body to the treasure that awaited him. As his sight took in all that was her, dripping, throbbing, almost flushed red from her desire, he let loose a rumble of appreciation from deep inside. She immediately tried to close her legs, not sure what the rumble meant and embarrassed that he was seeing her like this. At once, he jerked his head up to look at her, hands tightening slightly on her ankles, “No, this is mine. Do not ever hide from me. You are,” he paused looking for the right word, “everything.” Every ounce of love, devotion, adoration that could ever exist in his soul was put into that word. Into the look he gave her. It wasn’t enough, the word wasn’t enough, but it would have to do. He hoped the emotion she saw in his eyes would make her understand. She shifted against him where her ass sat against his knees. He looked down at her pussy again, dragging the tip of one finger gently through the wetness dampening the delicate curls between her legs, “You are perfect, Heart.” Then in a voice that let her know that his Bear was there too, “Mine.” She was panting now, not sure if the arousal or embarrassment would be the end of her. But she was certain that hyperventilation was in her immediate future. “Yes,” she whispered to him, “I’m yours.”
“Tell me what you want, Heart.”
“I, I don’t know. Nobody’s ever touched me like this.”
His head snapped up, “You’ve never…?”
“No, you’ll be my only.”
Bane immediately started to get to his feet, panic on his face.
“What? What is it? What did I do?” Janie asked, starting to panic herself now.
He was standing, looking around for her clothes.
“Bane, tell me what I did wrong!” she raised her voice to be sure to get his attention.
He stopped looking around himself for her clothes, “I can’t take you like this. Not here, not your first time, on the ground like an animal. You deserve something special, something you will always remember. Something that no one else will ever have. Not like this, on the ground.” He shoved both his hands into his hair in frustration, looking around himself again. “I can’t believe I almost ruined your first time,” he muttered to himself.
Janie was on her feet now, wrapping her arms around his waist, looking up to be sure he was looking at her, sure to hear every word she had to say to him. “I have something no one else will ever have. I have you. You are my Mate. And you are going to make me yours, here, on the grass in the most peaceful setting I’ve ever seen. Right here, near where you are building our home. And each time we come here with our family, and eventually with our kids, we are going to look at each other and smile. Knowing that this is where the two of us became one. Where you claimed me, and I claimed you. It’ll be our special place, sacred to us. No one else will ever get to experience that with you.”
He smiled at her, his Janie. She wanted to tie them both to this peaceful, special place. And if this was what she wanted, this was exactly what he’d give her. He kissed her again, then slowly, carefully laid her back in the grass, and she kept her hold on him, making him lie down with her. His kisses ran down the side of her neck, then to her collarbone and eventually her nipples, where he leisurely nipped and suckled ‘til she was moaning in need. In response to his every move, every caress. He licked the underside of her breast and was surprised to find how sensitive she was there. He was lost kissing his way down her stomach, and dipping his tongue into her belly button. The taste of her skin was addictive, and he was fully under her spell. He smiled to himself; his little female had no idea just how much control she had over him. There was nothing he wouldn’t do just for one of her smiles. He started to move lower, kissing her hip bones, and lower yet, when she grabbed his head, wrapping her hands in his hair to stop him. He looked up, and her eyes were huge, her head shaking back and forth, “What are you doing? You can’t kiss me there,” she told him. He chuckled at her, moving to take her hands from his hair, kissing the center of each palm as he held her wrists in his hands, “Yes, Heart, I can. Lie back, let me teach you, just like you asked.” Then he dropped his head and buried his face between her legs. Tongue busy, lapping up every bit of honey dripping from her core, flicking her clit, tracing circles around it, as she writhed her hips against his face. Her hands now gripping the grass underneath her, beside her, trying to gain a little more traction, so she could move her body exactly where she wanted his mouth. He slid his han
ds under her ass and held her to him, so he could delve even deeper inside her. Licking, sucking, biting, stroking, until she exploded on his tongue. Screaming out her release as the muscles in her body constricted, making her shake and shiver. He made sure to bring her all the way through it; then, he slowly crawled up her body, kissing, licking his way, until he was looking down at her face, his hips flush against hers, his cock throbbing, pressed against her entrance. She opened her eyes, now heavily lidded and smiled lazily at him, “Oh. My. God. You can do that any time you want.”
“Good. You’re now my favorite flavor,” he kissed the end of her nose. “Are you ready, Heart? I need to be inside you.”
She rocked her hips a little to just barely edge the tip of him inside her, and he growled, a deep needful growl. “Make me yours, Bane.”
“It’s going to hurt, Love, but only for a little while. Then it will be good after that. I promise,” he looked at her, waiting for her to give him the final okay.
She nodded, “Just don’t stop until it’s done. I want to make sure that no one can ever take me from you again.”
He kissed her and pushed a little further inside her, trying to give her plenty of time to adjust to his size. She inhaled deeply and lifted her hips a little to give him a better angle. He pulled out a bit and pushed again, this time moving until he felt the slight barrier inside her. “I can’t believe that you saved this for me. That you are giving me this gift.”
“I love you, Bane. It will only ever be you.”
He looked at her with tears in his eyes, “You’ll never regret this, Heart. You’ll never regret me. You will always be my only priority. Everything I am is yours, everything I will ever be. Yours,” then he pulled back slightly and slammed home. She arched her back and cried out at the pain. But he held her tightly in his arms, his hips pressed against her, holding perfectly still, kissing her throat, the shell of her ear. Telling her how much he loved her, how precious she was and would always be to him. It was only a few minutes, moments really, until the burning stopped. And she rocked a little on him, experimentally. At the feeling of him pressing, rubbing deep inside her, against her womb, she gave a little shiver and moaned. He lifted enough to see her face, “Okay, now, Heart?”
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