by Karen Anne
Harry ran a hand through his hair and looked around to see if anyone was listening. Reassured we were in the darkest corner of the bar, he looked up at me over the frames of his glasses. “I do, but I only have one.”
“Oh.” I assumed he wanted it. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny clear bag, and inside was the magic white pill that had erased all my pain the other day. Harry opened the bag, took out the pill, and placed it on his tongue. My heart sank a little. That was a dick move. He didn’t have to pop it in front of me.
But then he got off the stool, stepped toward me, eliminating the space between us, swept his hands up to the sides of my neck, and pulled me closer. Pulled me closer and kissed me.
His lips were warm and inviting. His hands slid back, grabbing my hair, and holding me in complete submission. A little surge of electricity flashed across my heart over the complexity of what he had done. His lips felt both incredible and very wrong against mine.
This was David’s cousin, and although hot as hell, it would be inappropriate on so many levels to change the dynamics of our relationship. So when he parted my lips with his tongue, I should have pushed him away. But I didn’t, because in that moment, I wanted to feel something, even if it was the wrong thing. And as his tongue rolled over mine, he expertly placed the magic pill there, then drew back, releasing me from his kiss.
I looked at him, still in shock over what he had done, swallowed the pill, and chased it down with his beer before I was able to speak. “What was that all about?”
“I said I had one.” Harry smiled. “I never said I wouldn’t share.” He licked his full bottom lip, reminding me that it was just pressed against mine. I had to refrain from touching my mouth. “I’m going to get another beer. Would you like one?” He tilted his head and leaned in closer. I was speechless, so I nodded.
When he walked over to the bar, I tore my brain apart over what had happened. I had been thinking about Harry kissing me all week. That was mainly why I didn’t seek him out. Now that he had, I was even more confused.
That kiss was bold, and hot… and…and it made me feel incredibly alive.
Newly rejuvenated, I strolled over to the jukebox and flipped through the choices, looking for something I could dance to. The pill would be kicking in soon. Knowing that my anxiety shed itself, and a happier, more confidant Kristen took hold. I slipped a few bills into the machine and hit the numbers, making my choice. No one had played any music yet, so my song began right away. I started swaying my hips to Sia’s Cheap Thrills, singing along as I picked a few more songs.
A hot hand was on my waist, and I could feel Harry behind me, matching my movements. God how long had it been since I danced with a guy! David was usually dancing with his guitar, leaving Brit for my dancing partner. I leaned back, feeling how perfectly we fit together. Harry placed the two beers on top of the juke box with his free hand, and then wrapped his arm around my body, resting his palm on my hip.
There was something sensual about having dropped the veil of inhibitions. We were in a bar where no one knew us, chemicals soaring through my system and the knowledge that David was officially out of my life. I swung around to face him, raising my arms over my head as our legs interlocked and our bodies began to wind themselves together to the hypnotic rhythm.
I leaned in closer and inhaled his scent. I had no idea what he was wearing, but he was delicious. Harry buried his head against my neck and began kissing me… I brought my palm to the back of his head and held him closer, willing to freeze time and just enjoy this moment of reckless abandon. Harry swept his lips across my skin, brushing them over my cheek until he found my lips again. I didn’t kiss him. I drowned in him. I had been fighting this for so long. Why? It felt so good, and finally, I allowed myself to surrender. My lips instantly parted, and his tongue was dancing against mine. He was kissing me deeper than he had the last time, and without the pill to juggle, it was like our tongues were properly being introduced for the first time.
The song ended, and my next pick came on. It was a ballad, and a lot more sobering. Harry slowed his kisses and took a moment to catch his breath. I realized I was breathing heavy as well. He raised his gaze to meet mine, and there was a look in his eyes I had never seen before. Was that lust? I couldn’t tell. I didn’t even care. He reached up and grabbed one of the beers off the shelf and handed it to me. Then he grabbed his and took a long a drink.
“What are we doing?” I asked, a smile creeping up on my face when I saw how disheveled his hair was. I reached up and ran my fingers through it. He was always so neat. To see him like this was comical… but still hot.
“What we should have done a long time ago.” He clinked his glass with mine, grabbed my hand and led me to the back of the bar. I expected to be lured into a dark corner. But he stopped at the pool table and handed me a stick. “So, what should we play for?”
TWENTY-FIVE
On Thursday, Harry met me in the music room as promised. When he came in, it was weird seeing him in the daylight. I mean, we were technically inside, but the last time I had seen him it had been dark, and we had kissed, and we were high, and life was just one weird blur. But now we were sober, and there were very fluorescent lights overhead. There was nowhere to hide, and I was nervous, and antsy.
“Hey, you,” Harry said and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I felt my heart skip at the gesture. Stupid rush of hormones.
“Hey, I was afraid you wouldn’t show.”
Harry crinkled his brow, and his dimples danced in his cheeks. “Why wouldn’t I show?”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged. My gaze dropped to his full lips, and I remembered how they felt against mine. Good— so damn good. Sigh. What the hell was I doing here?
He dropped his bag and sat next to me on the piano bench. “So… how private is this room?” And there it was: He wanted to do naughty, dirty things in the college music room. And there was a part of me that wanted to do all those things, too. His kisses felt like a rollercoaster. The foreplay was the slow climb to the top, then as his lips touched mine, the coaster plummeted to the bottom, taking me through unfamiliar twists and turns. I was terrified but excited at the same time, all the while holding on for dear life. It was a rush, and seeing those pretty lips right in front of me… I wanted to experience it all over again.
“Uh, pretty private.” I gestured to the padded walls. “It’s sound proof, and since I booked the room for a lesson, no one should walk in. Why?”
“I just had a shitty morning, stuff going on at work, and then there was this argument I had on the phone…”
“Who’d you argue with?” I hoped it wasn’t someone that could report him. I’d hate for him to get fired. I had a feeling he was skipping out on work today to hang with me. I couldn’t be sure, but it was just a hunch I had.
“No one important.” His smile got wider. “Uh, how was your day?”
“I’m pretty sure I bombed my psych midterm. Side effect of going out and playing pool when I probably should have been studying.”
“So we’re both having solid days then.”
“Yeah, looks that way.”
Harry rested the palm of his hand on his thigh and looked around the room once more. “Well, we do have a private room. Want to make it a private party?”
I laughed. “What do you mean?”
Harry eyed the door, making sure it was shut all the way. Reassured, he pulled out a small, red tin. The kind that holds mints. I furrowed my brow and watched him open it. Inside were a few of those white pills, which could easily be mistaken for the mints. Harry offered me one, and I thought, what the hell, and held out my palm. “Don’t swallow it,” he said with a warning tone.
Still confused, I watched as he closed the lid of the piano and ran his hands over the smooth, black lacquer. He reached over, grabbed a staff notebook, and tore out a blank piece of paper, folding it into fours to create a pocket. I leaned over, fascinated by what he was doing. Harry placed the pill inside the pocket and offered it t
o me to drop mine in. Then he put the paper onto the makeshift shelf of the piano. Pulling out a lighter, he pressed it against the paper, crushing the pill.
I should have been terrified. I should have said he was taking our happy hour a bit too far, but I was fascinated. It was still the same stuff, and if I had to be honest with myself, it gave me a weird rush. We were at school, anyone could walk in, and as Harry dumped the fine crushed powder onto the piano, my veins vibrated with excitement. When I was thirteen, I used to snort blue pixie sticks with my friends at slumber parties. It was just kids being stupid, pretending we were coke heads. We didn’t even really know what a coke head was.
But this time it wasn’t pixie sticks, and I wasn’t thirteen, and I had no idea how to classify the man sitting next to me.
The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, on high alert, but not wanting to back out, I took a deep breath and calmed myself. This was no different than an afternoon cocktail. It was one pill—the same pill I had taken three other times to dull the pain—just in a different form. No big deal. Harry pulled out his license and started dividing the powder equally between us. I expected him to make two neat lines, but he got all artsy on me and made an X and an O.
“Your call, Kris. Hugs or kisses?” He looked at me with a crooked grin, and my heart twitched in my chest in response. The O was closer, but I leaned over to his side of the piano. With a shaky hand, I placed one finger to the side of my left nostril and snorted up the powder with my right. I threw my head back— twitching my nose and rubbing it. It was itchy and felt weird.
I had just snorted my first line, and I was still here, one hundred percent fine.
Harry cocked his head to the side, showing how I had only taken half the X. I nodded and repeated the gesture, snorting up the rest, leaving no trace of powder. I think I felt his hand at the back of my head, but I wasn’t sure. His touch was so soft. Either that or I was already hallucinating—clearly this way was far more effective. I already felt good.
When I lifted my head and saw it was all gone, Harry smiled. He leaned over, collecting the powdery O in one shot. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t impressed. He cleaned off the piano, making sure there was no trace of our crime scene, then said, “So, I just taught you something. What are you going to teach me today?”
“The C chord.” I laughed. Suddenly, everything was funny again. The drowsy sensation of happiness fell over me right away, much faster than the last two times, and this was closer to the first time. I lifted the lid of the piano and spread my legs apart to work the peddles. My thigh pressed against his, and I momentarily closed my eyes at our contact.
“So… um… These are your chords. This is A.” I played the chord. “B.” I played that one. “And C.” But before I could play C, Harry placed his hand over mine, and the gesture caught me off guard.
I turned to look at him. He tilted his head and leaned in. My eyes instinctively closed as he kissed me. It wasn’t like last time where I was shocked. I think from the moment he had sat down, I fully expected this. There was an urgency between us, like we both wanted this but needed the courage of the drug before we could meet here. Wherever here was. Maybe it was a place that only existed when we were high. I didn’t care. The only thing I cared about right now was feeling his full, hot lips and delicious mouth. Every massage of his tongue against mine felt better than the last, and I abandoned my life preserver, deciding to go for a swim in the deep end. I wanted to drown all my pain of the last few months in Harry.
“I’ve been thinking about this all day,” he said against my lips as he grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled me closer. I secretly loved that he was being a little rough. It was so opposite of David, and I was finding it hard to think, for every movement he made was exciting.
Suddenly, Harry plucked his mouth away, looking around, and licking his bottom lip. I was about to ask if anything was wrong when he stood and pulled me up by my wrists. Kicking back the piano bench he raised one brow into a perfect arch. “You said these walls are soundproof, right?”
“Y-yes…” I stammered. “Why?”
Harry grabbed my hips, lifted me up, and sat me right on top of the ivory keys. The piano clashed beneath my ass, and I looked at him, wide eyed. But there was no time to complain, for his mouth was back on mine, and my arms were looped around his neck. I couldn’t remember the last time I had made out with anyone like this. Oh right… last night at the bar. Of course, David and I had made-out often, but this was so savage and raw.
Harry was pressed against me, his body hard and firm, and every time we moved, there was the tinkling of keys, which only made me want him more. There were no inhibitions. No boundaries. Just us.
And the sound of the door opening.
“Miss Kristen, I forgot my music,” said the voice of Aidan Lee. My eight-year-old student.
I tried to push Harry off me, but it was too late. I was sitting on the piano, one leg hooked around Harry’s waist. Harry’s lips covered in my rouge lipstick. His glasses were crooked, my shirt disheveled, and Mrs. Lee glared at us like she had just walked in on a bad music teacher porno.
“Outside, Aidan!” she snapped. “This is not for children’s eyes.” Aidan looked horrified and confused. He darted out of the room— without his sheet music. I looked on the floor. There it was. It must have fallen off the top of the piano in the midst of our drug induced frenzy.
I pushed Harry off me. “Mrs. Lee. I am so, so sorry,” I said as I slid off the piano and planted both feet on the floor.
“You have no idea what sorry is. Such disrespect. This is a school! You will no longer teach my son, and I will tell Mr. Russel about this!” Mr. Russel was the chair of the music department, my boss, and probably the teacher I admired most at school.
“Mrs. Lee, I said I was sorry. Aidan should have knocked. If I were giving a lesson, as the sign on the door clearly stated, he never should have entered.”
“You would blame a child?” Mrs. Lee looked horrified at the thought. “And what kind of lesson, may I ask, were you giving?”
I couldn’t answer her. Everything was getting fuzzy and too much to handle. I snapped. Poised, in-control Kristen stepped aside, and don’t-give-a-crap-Kristen took over. “You know what? Your kid sucks, and I’m glad I don’t have to listen to his shitty version of Hot Cross Buns anymore.”
Mrs. Lee didn’t answer, just stormed out, slamming the door behind her. A framed poster of A Chorus Line came crashing to the ground from the aftershock.
Thunk. Crash. Glass everywhere. Mr. Russel loved that stupid poster. I spun around and looked at Harry. He was smiling— no, laughing. And suddenly, I was laughing, too.
“Why am I laughing? I think I just got fired!” I was hysterical now, tears forming I was laughing so hard.
“Maybe, but it was so worth it. Did you see her face? And that kid! He’ll probably rub one out thinking about you tonight. Congrats, I do believe you are responsible for that guy’s first erection.”
Now I was laughing so hard I had fallen to the floor. I was waving my arms, scared if he said another word I’d pee my pants. “I hate to inform you…” More laughter. “But I think that was your first and last piano lesson.”
“I guess you’ll have to give me singing lessons then.” Harry offered his hand to help me up, but I was laughing too hard, and he ended up collapsing next to me. He laid flat against the floor, and we both just listened to the sound of our laughter as it echoed around the room. Finally, when we stopped, I rolled over to him, my breathing labored from the laughter. “So, I really don’t want to face Mr. Russel. Let’s sneak out before Mrs. Lee is done with him. Wanna go back to my sorority house?” I smiled. “We can walk there,” I added, convinced neither of us should be operating heavy machinery at this point.
He curled a lock of my hair around his finger and pulled me closer. David flashed in my mind. How many times had he playfully tugged on my hair to steal a kiss? But I shoved the memory away, expecting Harry to kiss me.
But he didn’t. Instead, he tapped the end of my nose. “Yeah. That sounds fun.” I think we both knew what he meant by fun.
We laughed most of the way there. Harry kept doing imitations of Mrs. Lee, and I almost wished I could have seen what we looked like from her point of view. I’m sure it was all very educational.
When we got to the Delta Sig house, we burst into the living room, laughing and telling tidbits of a conversation that no one would understand but us.
“What’s so funny?” Skylar asked as she looked through the hallway closet for her shawl.
“I think I just got fired,” I said, snorting.
“How is that funny?” Skylar looked disgusted, which of course made me laugh harder.
“You had to be there,” Harry said.
I nodded, took his hand, and pulled him up the stairs to my room. I wanted him alone, now. As soon as we were in my room, I locked the door and stuck my phone in my speakers. Clicking on Pandora, I didn’t even care what station was on. Nicki Manaj started singing to us, and Harry reached over, raising the volume to fully experience the surround sound.
“You really like Nicki, huh?”
“No, I just plan on getting really loud with you.” He stepped closer, eliminating the space between us. “Do you object to any of that?” He seemed to tower over me. If I wasn’t so high, he’d be crazy intimidating right now.
I needed to move on. The only way to get over David was to start over, and now seemed like as good a time as any. I raised myself up on my tippy toes and went to kiss him, but he pulled back. “What?” I asked in surprise. His expression was stoic, his eyes locked on mine.
“You didn’t answer my question. I asked if you objected.” Harry wrapped his hand firmly around the back of my neck, lacing his fingers through my hair. He was doing that controlling thing again. My knees became jiggly. “You want this, right?”
I nodded, and he slammed his mouth against mine. I melted against him, and the rest of the world faded away. I couldn’t hear the music. I didn’t care that there was a house full of sisters. All that mattered was living in this moment. We had a “no boys sleeping over” rule, but this wasn’t a sleep over. This was afternoon delight.