by J. A. Owenby
I tapped an intricate rhythm on the rim, bounced the sticks off the edge into the air, spun them around, and caught them. The audience went wild as paint sprayed over my poncho and face. My eyes closed momentarily while I entered into a five-minute routine, and my mind quieted. Music and my drums were the only things that helped me truly find peace inside myself. When I played the last lick, I let out a loud whoop. Thunderous applause finally pulled me back to reality. I flashed a grin at Benji and Avery while I removed my now multicolored slicker and wadded it into a ball. I dropped it on the mat and hopped off the stage.
“Damn, girl, you get better and better every time I hear you!” Avery gave me a big hug, ignoring the blue and yellow splotches on my face and hair.
“I need to go to the bathroom and wash up.”
“Coming through!” Avery called. Everyone let us pass by without us having to elbow our way through them.
“Oh my God. I am terrified when I’m up there, but it’s such a fucking rush!” I exclaimed, turning on the cold water. I grabbed a few paper towels and soaked them. “So much for any makeup remaining in place.”
“Lemme get it.” Avery held her hand out to me, and I gave her the wet mass that was my makeshift washcloth.
She tilted my chin up and dabbed lightly at my skin. “I think that performance calls for more drinks. On me.” She smiled while she cleaned me up.
“Thanks. Since I’m broke until next payday, I’ll take you up on it.” I tilted my head so she could reach my neck.
A few minutes later, we exited the bathroom and made our way to the bar.
Avery rattled off our order, and I glanced over my shoulder, locating Benji chatting up a guy I hadn’t seen before. My gaze returned to Matthew, the bartender, and I flashed him a shy smile.
“You’re hot as hell up there,” Matthew said while he made our drinks. His big brown eyes never left me as he poured a jigger and a half of vodka into a glass, then topped it with cranberry juice.
“Thanks.” Heat rose in my cheeks. I rarely received compliments, much less about my appearance, and I immediately turned stone cold inside. I’d worked for so long not to be seen, so I never really knew how to take praise or what to say in return. Unfortunately, my first thought was to wonder what the person wanted from me—my body or a blow job. Dark memories of my last foster home ripped through me, leaving me trembling slightly.
“Yours is on the house. If you performed more often, I think it would definitely pull in a crowd. Plus, I’d pay you in alcohol.” A huge grin split Matthew’s face as he winked at me.
“I might take you up on that sometime.” That wasn’t the first time Matthew had flirted with me, but it was just harmless. He wasn’t really interested.
Avery discreetly nudged me in the ribs, and I narrowed my eyes, shooting her a knock it off look before taking a drink of my Cape Cod.
“Thanks, Matthew. I appreciate it.” I gave him a grateful smile and scanned the room to see where Benji was. A flicker of something familiar caught my eye, and I turned toward the end of the bar. Eyes the color of blue-gray stormy skies stared back at me. My breath hitched as a chill tingled down my spine. The drink slipped from my hands and crashed to the floor.
“Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or some shit.” Avery grabbed my arm and shook it slightly. “Hey, Tensley.” Her other hand gently patted my cheek as she demanded my attention.
I dragged my focus away from the guy at the end of the bar and swallowed hard. This can’t be happening. How did he find me? Bile rose in my throat, and I willed the foul taste down.
“I gotta go,” I croaked. “Sorry I made a mess, Matthew.”
Matthew nodded at me. “You don’t look too good. Don’t worry about it. We’ll get it.”
Before Avery could say anything else, my focus landed on the guy at the end of the bar again. I wanted to tell myself I was mistaken, that there was no way in fucking hell Layne Garrison was staring back at me. But I couldn’t deny it.
2
Gasping for fresh air, I bolted through the front door and into the parking lot. Tears pricked my eyes, and I angrily forced them back. I’d sworn off crying years ago. It was a sign of weakness and vulnerability. One thing I’d learned from bouncing around to different homes and families was to never let them see me hope or cry. Hope I would fit in—cry when I didn’t.
“What in the world?” Avery asked, running through the parking lot after me. “Tensley, stop!” She pulled on my arm and whirled me around to face her. “Shit, you’re pale. Are you sick?” Her eyes narrowed while she analyzed me.
“Yeah.” I would go with that excuse. I’d had several shots close together, which would support my lie. “I needed some air before I puked all over Matthew. Sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you.” I held my breath, not knowing whether she would see through me. I hated not being honest with my best friend, but I didn’t know how to even begin to process that Layne Garrison was in Spokane, Washington. Fuck.
A brisk wind kicked up and I wrapped my arms around myself. It wasn’t that cold yet, but October was right around the corner, and the temps would take a hard dip.
“Nope. Your reason isn’t working. Try again.” She tapped her finger against her chin while she studied me.
My shoulders sagged in defeat. Avery wasn’t going to let it go.
“You were looking at some hot dude when you turned ghostly white on me. Even those cute freckles on your nose and cheeks paled. Something is definitely up with this guy, and I’m not sure I like it.”
“Tensley?” Benji hurried toward us. “What’s up? Why did you guys leave so fast?”
Shit. Apparently, my shock had sent off a beacon warning to my friends, casting me in the spotlight. But I didn’t know how in the hell I would explain who Layne was.
I dabbed at the little beads of sweat that had formed over my brow, and my attention bounced between Avery and Benji.
“Spit it out already.” Benji motioned for me to hurry up. Patience had never been his strong suit.
I closed my eyes. “He’s someone I know from Arkansas. We went to high school together.” I peered at them through one eye, afraid of the million questions they were sure to fire my way like rapid torpedoes.
“Oh, this sounds delish.” Benji looped his arm through mine. “Why the mad dash, then? I mean, you know him. Why not wave and say hi?”
A group of loud guys barged through the door of the bar, their voices echoing through the parking lot. I peered over at them and my heart skidded to a stop. Layne had lagged behind his friends and was staring at me. He didn’t look much different than he had a few years ago. He’d always kept his dark hair short, but long enough for him to comb his fingers through it. His shoulders had broadened since I’d seen him last, but he appeared to have topped out at a little more than six foot. Although I hated him with every fiber of my being, even I couldn’t deny that he had a fabulous ass and muscular legs. But he knew it, which made me despise him even more.
Avery elbowed me in the side, her eyes narrowing slightly. “Are you going to talk to him?”
She was testing me. I hadn’t been able to reroute her suspicions that something was off.
I shook my head. “No.” Maybe if I ignored him, the demon spawn would disappear and go back to the hell he’d come from.
The bright-red neon lights of the open bar sign blinked, casting an eerie shadow over Layne’s face. It was then that I noticed how exhausted and sad he looked. Hollow.
“Layne, dude, come on!” one of the guys called to him.
Layne shoved a hand into the front pocket of his jeans, stared at me another few seconds, then joined the group. A massive sigh of relief whooshed out of my lungs.
Benji looped an arm through mine and dragged me toward the car. “Girl, you got some ’splainin’ to do.”
“That’s it? It’s only midnight, and we’re leaving?” Avery hurried behind us, her heels scuffing against the asphalt. I had no idea how she walked in those shoes,
but she loved them. She had multiple pairs that worked with her jeans, and even more for her dresses. Avery’s closet looked like a section out of Nordstrom’s.
“Well we can’t talk in there because it’s too loud.” Benji nodded toward the bar. “And I know this shit is going to be too good to miss a single word of, so it’s off to grab a midnight bite and some coffee. Besides, I wasn’t going to score tonight anyway.”
He opened the car door for me, and I gratefully slipped into the back seat, tucking myself away from the world once again.
Avery hopped in the front, and in seconds, Benji started the car then pulled out of the parking lot.
Avery twisted in her seat and stared a hole straight into my soul. She’d always had the uncanny ability to do that, and it made me incredibly uncomfortable. There were some things not even my best friends knew about me, and I wasn’t planning on sharing. “He’s hot and you know him, so cough up the deets. If you don’t want to talk to him, I will.”
“No!” I covered my mouth with my hands in order to not say anything else.
Benji peered in the rearview mirror at me, and I went limp.
“He’s not a good guy.” Maybe that was enough information to calm their curiosity. It was bad enough he was there. I didn’t want to dredge up bad memories too.
Avery’s face was filled with intrigue. “Why?”
Fuck. Layne wasn’t a part of my past I wanted to revisit or cough up details about. Yes, he was gorgeous, but underneath his hot exterior, I was sure he had horns and a forked tail.
“Give her a few minutes to think, and she can talk when we have some coffee in front of us. Besides, I don’t want to miss anything.” Benji flipped on his turn signal while we waited for a few cars to pass us in the opposite lane before turning into the Satellite Diner and Lounge.
As soon as he parked, I jumped out of the car and hurried toward the restaurant entrance. I stepped inside the warmth of the rustic diner and held the door open for Avery and Benji.
The soft glow of the lights illuminated the few faces that were scattered at tables across the room. A whiff of hamburgers lingered in the air, and for a moment, I was hungry. But then Layne’s face appeared in my mind and my longing for food dissipated.
“Almost snow weather,” Benji said as he draped his arm over my shoulder. We strolled through the restaurant and selected a cozy, private booth for four in the back corner. Avery and Benji sat across from me, and I sank into the hard, unforgiving leather seat as deeply as I could.
Holly, one of our regular waitresses, approached us, grinning broadly. “How are my favorite people tonight?”
“Hey, honey.” Benji gave her a million-dollar smile and a wink. Although Holly knew Benji wasn’t into women, they flirted like they were going to go hook up in the bathroom. “Just the usual for us, please.”
“Got it. Pot of coffee, cream, and pancakes for all.” She didn’t even scribble the order down on her little pad.
We were there at least once a week. It was cheap and something I could afford. My job at the college library covered living expenses and left me with a bit of side money, but not much. I’d made the cutoff for the work study applications by the skin of my teeth, so I wasn’t going to flip off fate and look for something better right now. When Avery, Benji, and I had looked for a house to rent, I’d offered to take the smallest room in order to reduce my costs a bit. What I hadn’t anticipated was the fight between them for the master, but Benji had finally won by offering to pay part of my rent as well. I wasn’t sure why he’d played it that way, but it had gotten him what he wanted.
“All right, toots, fill us in on Mr. Smoody.” Benji squirmed in his seat with anticipation while he waited for me to begin.
I looked at him and Avery, pondering how much I should tell them. Then it dawned on me what Benji had said. I frowned. “Smoody?”
“Smoking hot and moody. I saw him sitting at the end of the bar, staring at you like you were an edible. Girl, it was smoldering.” He fanned himself, closing his eyes briefly.
Although Benji had an amazing ability to read people, he was wrong about Layne. Really wrong.
“Oh, I like that.” Avery leaned her head on Benji’s shoulder, but her attention never left me. “Enough stalling, Tensley. Spit it out like it’s a bad, skunky beer that just hit your tongue.”
I sat up ramrod straight in my seat. Maybe it was safe to tell them at least some of the story. “His name is Layne Garrison, and we attended high school together.”
“You already said that,” Avery said, drumming her fingers on the table impatiently.
“Mm-hmm. I got that part already. Keep going.” Benji propped his elbows up and leaned forward, ready for more.
“In Arkansas … I-I just have no clue why in the world he’s here, like, in Spokane.” My forehead creased as I searched for a good reason, but my mind only came up with a big, fat blank.
“Okay, wait.” Avery pressed her fingers to her temples. “I’ve had more to drink than I realized. Tonight, while we were at Barney’s, you turned around, and Mr. Smoody was at the end of the bar, staring a hole in your head because he knew you from Arkansas?”
“Is he your kindred hillbilly folk?” Benji chimed in.
I rolled my eyes. “We’re not hillbillies. Well, I take that back. Some are, but he wasn’t, and neither was I.”
Avery harrumphed and reached for the pot of coffee and cups Holly had just set down in front of us. She filled it, topped it off with creamer, and scooted it toward me. Then she began to pour her own coffee but hesitated, her green eyes landing on me. “Whoever he is, he meant something to you. I can’t put my finger on it yet, but there were sparks between the two of you. I just don’t know if they were good or bad.”
“Bad, definitely bad.” I focused on my steaming cup and took a sip. “Layne …” My heartrate spiked at the mention of his name. I’d sworn I would never speak it again once I left Arkansas, yet there I was a few years later, discussing him. “Layne bullied me in school. I have no clue why, but he hated me. He and his girlfriend, Chloe, made my life hell.” There, I’d said it.
“Oh, hon.” Benji reached across the table and took my hand in his. “What happened?”
“A lot. Too much to go into, but said torture included, but was not limited to, pulling my sweatpants down in front of the entire school during lunch, filling a paper bag with dog shit and putting it in my locker, and tapping my pubic bone with a glass bottle when I walked by. The last one doesn’t sound like much, but somehow that son of a bitch knew right where to aim. It doubled me over every time.”
“Jesus,” Avery said. “This wasn’t some silly high school nonsense, Tensley. That’s brutal. Mean.”
“That wasn’t even the worst of it, but I can’t …” I held up my hands, waving any additional questions off.
Benji’s eyes grew serious. “Do I need to rough him up?”
There was no doubt in my mind that Benji would be a good match for Layne, but there wasn’t any need for anyone else to get hurt. “Thanks. I really appreciate it, but I’m sure the college campus is big enough to provide some separation.”
“Well, you and I have three of our five classes together, so if I see the smoody shit anywhere around, I’ll scream bloody murder. He won’t fuck with you again,” Avery insisted.
My chest warmed with affection for both Avery and Benji. For the first time in my life, I’d not only developed deep friendships, but I knew they would do anything in their power to protect me. What they didn’t understand was that I had needed someone like them a long time ago, but now it was too late. Only one person could protect me—me.
“I appreciate you both.”
We grew quiet, focusing on our coffee. Layne’s smoky-blue eyes flashed in my mind again, and my anxiety crept up another notch. I hoped like hell he left me alone, but just in case, I needed a backup plan. Like pepper spray, a kick to the groin, or a strike of my hand to the soft tip of his nose. Although the thought should have pro
vided me a bit of peace, it didn’t. Every time Layne had cornered me at school, I’d frozen. His sneer and laughter flickered through my memory, and my leg began bouncing nervously beneath the table.
“Here ya go,” Holly said as she set down our pancakes, breaking through my internal horror.
“Thanks.” I grabbed my knife and fork. The smell of fresh pancakes tickled my nose, and I took a large whiff. I nearly groaned as I shoved a forkful into my mouth. “Never do I grow tired of fluffy buttermilk pancakes.”
“Right?” Benji dabbed the corners of his mouth with his napkin, then began to cut another bite. “Why do you think he’s here? I mean, seriously, Tensley, what’s the likelihood that he’d leave Arkansas and land in the same place as you? That shit only happens in movies.”
Dammit. I’d hoped they would let it go when our food arrived. I really didn’t want to talk about it anymore.
“He was an all-star track athlete back home. Maybe he got a scholarship. I can guarantee you, his girlfriend, Chloe—if she still has her vile claws in him—is also here. She’d never let him move across the country without her.” I squinted as the lights from a car entering the parking lot flashed through the window and into my eyes.
“As a teacher’s assistant, I have access to student records,” Avery offered. “I can get a little bit of information if you want it. At least you’ll know where his classes are so you can steer clear.”
I didn’t like the idea of Avery checking into Layne, but it sounded like the best option to stay out of his way. Although I’d left Arkansas and my past behind, it never hurt to have some knowledge in order to protect myself.
“Deal. Let me know what you find out.”
The bell on the door jingled, and I glanced in that direction. A lead ball plummeted to the pit of my stomach. “Son. Of. A. Bitch.” My fork dropped out of my hand, bounced off the table, and clattered to the wooden floor.
Layne’s intense stare fell on me for the second time that night as he walked straight toward our table.