Rapture
Page 3
“These are the basic rules. Pets don’t walk on two legs, but four.”
I bowed my head and answered meekly, “Yes, Master.”
Kade actually chuckled and that made me look up at him. I flinched when his hand descended, but he only petted my hair. “Your acting skills are excellent, but they won’t work with me.”
I sniffed, watching him cross to the table set at the side of the room. The smell of food suddenly assaulted my senses. My stomach rumbled, reminding me the last meal I had was days ago.
“Come, Chase.”
I hated myself for succumbing. I knew what he wanted, and I did it, crawling on my hands and knees like an animal. Each distance covered made me conscious of the plug in me. There was a cushion by his feet, and I knelt on that, grateful for the softness.
Hold on a second. I was grateful he remembered to put a cushion for me to kneel on after he’d collared me and affixed leather cuffs to my limbs?
The smell of bacon and eggs assaulted my nostrils, and I found myself eagerly leaning to Kade’s knees. My pulse raced when he gripped my wrists, shaking his head at me.
“What did I do wrong now?” I blurted before I could stop myself.
Kade smirked as if he was waiting for my outburst all along to confirm I was doing as he just observed—acting.
“Master, please,” I automatically said, hating how easy the words came out of me.
“Pets aren’t allowed to touch their Masters without permission either. Has Marco taught you nothing?”
I couldn’t put sufficient words to what I was feeling. Anger, definitely, for allowing him to treat me like an animal, and disappointment for failing him. I bowed my head and decided keeping my mouth shut was the safer route this time.
“Do you remember my policy about answering my questions?”
Alarmed, I nodded and quickly said, “I’m sorry, Master. No, Marco didn’t lay out the rules.”
Kade nodded as if that explained everything. “Hold out your wrists to me.”
I presented my wrists to him and tried to keep my hands from trembling. He showed me what was on the table—a simple link of chain. Then he attached the chain around the rings connected to my wrists, preventing movement. I bit my lip. How could have he predicted my disobedience so easily?
He thumbed my left nipple thoughtfully. “I’m seriously considering piercing them so I could attach them to the table while I eat.”
Kade fingered the hook on the table, and I swallowed, wondering if he was insane. Thankfully, he said nothing more. We ate the rest of breakfast in silence, with Kade feeding me bits and pieces of bacon and eggs.
Not long ago, I thought Marco was the lesser evil, but I wasn’t sure anymore.
Chapter Four
Chase
My first mistake had been underestimating Kade and thinking I had him all figured out. After breakfast, he led me to the bathroom connected to the room. He made me sit on my haunches on the cold floor while he turned the tap to the bathtub on. Nervous, I watched him move about the bathroom. He opened a few drawers and pulled out towels and toiletries. I sighed in relief. I almost expected him pull out some frightening kinky toy like a magician.
Still, the game eluded me. Usually Marco left me on my own whenever I needed to clean myself up. Did Kade bring me here to watch him bathe? Did he somehow get off on making his human pet watch while he enjoyed the tub?
Without speaking, he approached me. I stifled the urge to flee and kept my head down. My composure broke when he easily lifted me by my waist. I gasped, tempted to kick him.
“Hush, pup,” he said in a soothing voice, lowering me into the tub.
Any fight I had died the moment the warm water caressed my skin. I sighed. Oh, God. I couldn’t remember the last time I had a proper bath. All Marco ever allowed were cold, quick showers. Even then, I had no privacy.
“Not too hot?” Kade asked.
I shook my head, and then remembered he expected answers to his questions. “No, Master,” I said quickly.
“Good.” He didn’t speak while he lathered my hair with shampoo and washed me with soap. Kade mutely slapped at my hand when I tried to rub at my knee. I understood. He wanted me to remain immobile as he groomed me.
After toweling me down, he dried my hair with a dryer and combed it, his touches impersonal and professional. The strange ritual confused me, but, instinctively, some part of me relaxed its guard. So far, Kade only resorted to his ‘punishments’ when I did something wrong. He hadn’t smacked me around or kicked me simply for the fun of it like Marco did.
“Come, pup.”
I followed him out of the room on my hands and knees and hesitated when he pointed to the bed.
“Lie on your back on the bed.”
“Um.” I hesitated, worried when his eyes narrowed.
“Are you refusing to obey the orders of your Master?” His voice held a slight edge.
“No, Master.” I quickly scrambled up the bed. I jerked when he grabbed my arm, crying out when he mutely pinched the tip of my cock.
“Stay still,” Kade admonished, reaching for what I realized was a thin chain connected to the head post of the bed.
Seeing the chain made me panic, and I realized the nature of his cruel game. I jolted up, but Kade firmly pressed one large hand over my belly.
“Don’t make this harder, Chase. Each act of disobedience earns you a punishment.” His low voice whispered so dangerously against my ear made my entire body tense. I watched him with wide eyes as he clipped the chain to the band on my left wrist. He did the right band next, so my arms were spread wide.
“Please, no. Don’t do this please,” I whispered, helplessly watching him walk to the foot of the bed.
“Do what, Chase? What did you expect me to do?” Kade asked, gripping my ankle. He didn’t attach the dangling chain at the foot of the bed immediately. He rubbed at my ankle gently, his touch hovering between the keen edge of seduction and the promise of violence.
“I-I don’t know. Something bad,” I managed, swallowing when he finally tied me spread-eagle to his bed. “Oh, God. Please. Just let me have it.”
He raised his eyebrows, feigning ignorance, while he circled me like a predator eying its prey. Underneath all his splendid control, his real self peeked out, a ravenous and possessive beast. The sheer intensity of his gaze as he appraised his prize—me, strung up and helpless—scared the living daylights out of me.
“What exactly are you asking me for, pup?” he asked in a mocking voice.
With the barest of touches, he traced the needle-riddled skin of my left arm with his fingertips, from my wrist to the crook of my elbow. I looked away, suddenly ashamed. Why shame touched me, why some smidge of self-pride returned to me that particular moment, was beyond me.
My place in the world had been decided for me. Junkie. Hole. Object. Nothing. Anything Marco wanted me to be. I ceased to become someone’s son, boyfriend. Hell, I ceased to become a human being the moment Marco forcibly made me his. Each degrading moment I endured with Marco stripped one layer of innocence from me. Yet here I was, mourning that innocence I no longer thought had any value.
“You know what I’m asking for. Please don’t make me say it,” I said, suddenly angry. What did Kade expect from me? My resolve and pathetic defiance crumbled bit by bit the longer he looked at me and said nothing. “Do you want to hear me beg? Fine. Please. Please give me my daily fix of R.”
Kade’s lips quirked to a cruel smile. My stomach knotted as the knowledge sank in. The bastard didn’t want to hear me beg. He never planned on giving me any R in the first place.
“Please, Kade,” I whispered, eyes filling with tears, not caring how my desperation shone like an ugly beacon. “I need the R to cope.”
Kade did the bad Master, good Master trick again. Instead of punishing me for using his name and acting out, he leaned in close. I jerked back, but he only kissed the side of my jaw, smoothed my hair.
“No, you don’t, Chase. Usin
g R to keep subs in line is fucking stupid. No. I’m going to wean you off of this filthy habit and make you submit to me without the drugs.”
Then Kade left me to my misery. I didn’t know what frightened me more— being cut off from the drugs, my only solace in this miserable existence, or Kade’s certainty I’d submit to him without them.
“No way in hell,” I whispered to the empty room.
* * *
I screamed myself hoarse, pulling at my restrains until they chafed and made my skin raw. I begged, pleaded, and cursed at the unfeeling bastard who kept me prisoner, but still nothing. Anxiety and restlessness invaded my waking thoughts. Sleep became hard to come by. Time became as insignificant as the innumerable dots on the ceiling.
Nothing I said or did seemed to affect Kade. Seeing what I did to my limbs, Kade mutely bandaged the irritated flesh and slapped fur-lined cuffs over them. He loosened the chains, allowing me some movement, but otherwise kept me in the same position while the withdrawal symptoms tested the limits of my sanity.
Kade only let me loose when he bathed or fed me. Sometimes, he kept my hands restrained behind my back. I didn’t know if he liked me helpless or he simply didn’t trust me enough.
When Kade was too busy to tend to me, he usually sent Henderson up. I’d been terrified of the hulking ex-military man at first, but, unlike Kade, Henderson proved to be predictable.
He’d place my tray of food on the bed, unlock my restraints, and watch me eat with a blank expression on his face. Kade must’ve given him explicit instructions because he’d stand by the side of the bed with his arms crossed until I finished every bite.
Begging, baiting, or trying to seduce Henderson wouldn’t get me anywhere. He wouldn’t respond to my questions or pleas. Henderson went about his tasks professionally, as if he was stuck caring for someone else’s pet dog or cat. Far from a potential ally, he was Kade’s man through and through, his loyalty unquestionable.
In the end, the only man I could try to sway and take a crack at was my captor.
“Please, I’ll do anything you ask of me, Master. Just a little. Please.” I repeated the words over and over again each time he checked on me, but they weren’t the words he wanted to hear.
I wasn’t sure what he wanted. I’d say anything just to feel the point of the needle sinking into my skin. Silence turned out to be the worse torture he could ever inflict. First Henderson, and then him. His gestures, his touches, were the only forms of communication I could rely on. They became my only connection to reality, reminding me the world remained physical and tangible. Kade became my anchor. The only face I looked upon while I remained locked away, and the only face I was excited to see after my long, grueling hours of sentence of isolation.
What else was there to look forward to? Marco gleefully reminded me my life no longer mattered because it belonged to him. Now it belonged to Kade.
When the horrible shakes started, and my entire sweat-soaked body began to tremble, I learned to yearn for his rough and large hands, the touch of a killer. I wanted to feel the pads of his thick fingers, the harsh texture of his calluses stroking my chest, belly, and thigh. It made me feel remembered, wanted, and real. The way my body painfully woke reminded me I wasn’t just a forgotten object left in the dark.
“Please. Say something. I need to hear your voice,” I croaked one night.
He settled himself against the edge of the bed, rubbing my knee. “Very well. What do you want to hear, Chase?” Just the sound of his voice consoled me, reminded me I wasn’t stuck in some sort of hallucination or some unique brand of hell.
“Just talk to me, please. I can’t stand the roaring silence. What are you thinking about?”
Something flickered across his gaze, an emotion I couldn’t read, but it vanished quickly, like a fleeting deer. “I’m thinking of you. That what I’m staring at is a product of manufactured human misery.”
I flinched at his words, suddenly remembering I hated him as much as I craved his touch. By stringing me up like this and making me face my demons, Kade began slowly working towards his goal. By stripping away every artifice and leaving me bare and shivering, he gave me no option but to crave my own submission to him.
“You, Keith, and the Brotherhood deal in nothing but pain and misery,” I whispered, shivering when he thumbed Marco’s name on my left pectoral.
He barely touched me, yet the slightest touch brought needle-sharp pain, jolting me back alive. Despite being wary, I desperately leaned towards his hand like an animal starved for affection.
“What we deal in is necessary evil,” Kade corrected. His dark eyes bore holes into mine, as if he finally acknowledged I was no longer an object fuelled by drugs but a real individual coming to terms with a painful reality.
“Taking R forces your brain to work like a spring. R acts like a depressant that pushes down the spring, making the brain reliant. When that weight disappears, well, you’re experiencing its effects.”
“I don’t need you to put into romantic words what I’m experiencing,” I spat, closing my eyes when I felt the slight tingle crawling up my spine, all the pent-up adrenaline of my withdrawal on the verge of erupting.
Shame filled me. I hated this. Hated Kade was always present to see the worst of me. I wasn’t always like this. Then again, I wasn’t always broken. Did Kade really think he could fix me?
“Hush, pup. What I’m doing is for your own good.” Kade pushed aside the hair from my face, traced the bridge of my nose, my cheekbone, and lingered on the curve of my jaw. “Once I’m done with you, you’ll be perfect.”
“So you’re saying I’m imperfect now? You’re too good for me?” I couldn’t help but ask, wary when a smile appeared on his cruel lips.
“I see we need to correct your behavior at once after we’ve cured you, but no. To answer your question, the last thing you are to me is repulsive, Chase,” he explained.
“You’re lying. You’re disgusted because you’ve suddenly discovered you’re left with this. With me.” I realized my words were a mistake a second too late.
Kade gripped my chin forcefully, painfully almost. Instead of being frightened, I was revoltingly relieved. Any tactile sensation, even pain, felt like a blessing.
“Don’t ever call me a liar,” Kade spat. Then he laughed harshly, a telltale sign his next few words were going to shred what little that remained of my pride. “Look at yourself, you pathetic, mewling boy. At the state you’re in right now, you’re practically begging me to hurt you.”
Hot tears gathered in my eyelids. “You made me this way, bastard. What did you expect? You tied me up for weeks and denied me any human contact but yours.”
“Do you prefer I untie you and set you free, Chase? Do you prefer being Marco’s boy? If you like waking up not knowing where you are, with dried blood and cum all over you, then say so,” Kade said in a cold and mocking voice lacking any mercy.
Panic began mounting inside me when he stood and reached out for the chain connected to my left wrist. Time came to a standstill. I felt more awake, more alive than I’d ever been.
This man had the power to hurt me. He wielded the power of life and death over me, but he never exercised his power. True, Kade kept me tied to his bed, but he’d never starve, hurt, or torture me. He did none of the things Marco did.
“No! Please, Master. I’d rather be with you,” I cried out, not caring when the last of my pride dissolved into nothingness. He paused, but I couldn’t stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks. I said with mounting frustration, “I just want to know why you don’t take advantage of me? If you find me appalling, tell me. I’ll change. I’ll be better. I promise.”
“You’re really worried about this, aren’t you?” Kade murmured, settling back on the edge of the bed. I was grateful for his familiar weight.
“Yes,” I whispered.
Knowing he wanted my gaze trained on him, I did my best even though I wanted to look away so he couldn’t see my dying and withering soul.<
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“Marco conditioned me thoroughly so I knew my only value lay in my body and my ability to please. What else can I think when you refuse to touch me?”
He leaned in close, tongue darting out to catch my tears. Kade licked his lips, as if he were savoring the salty fluid. I blushed for no reason at all, but he continued, dark gaze trained on me.
“Let me assure you I do want you, pup. I want you so badly every time I enter this room. I want to claim you until you can’t walk, can’t even breathe. If I can, I’ll fuck you to death and revive you so I can do it all over again.”
I breathed hard, not trusting myself to speak. Kade leaned in close to my face, his lips barely brushing against my cheek. To my shock, a sharp jolt of electricity crawled up my chest, and a strange longing settled in my hardening shaft. Marco pretty much killed my desire for anyone. I didn’t think I could get aroused without the help of drugs, yet I lusted for Kade like a dog in heat. I even moaned like one when he simply bit down on my earlobe.
Then he switched gears, twisting the plug in my ass, making me cry out.
“So don’t tell me how hard it is for you. You don’t know how it’s been for me,” Kade whispered. I whimpered when he stopped touching me. “But don’t worry your little head off, pup. I’m going to make you my bitch soon.”
Then he left me once again in the dark.
I loathed myself for my actions and the horrifying way I’d behaved. Hating myself, though, was nothing new. Wanting him, genuinely wanting him, to string my body like an instrument not because of self-preservation but for both our pleasures, had been the startling revelation.
Chapter Five
Kade
Fuck morals. I never pretended to be an honorable man, let alone a decent one. Growing up hard and fast on the streets with no one to rely on but my brother weeded out any shred of decency I possessed.
We built a lucrative empire out of dirt, even if it was an empire built on human misery, just to prove to the entire world we weren’t worthless sons of a junkie. I’d always been proud of how far we’d come, and it had always been enough. Until Chase came along, and I decided I needed to make him mine.