by J Santiago
Lu smiled a weary smile. “No, not really. I’m just accepting the inevitable.”
Willa reached over to give her hand a squeeze. “Are you telling Dr. J.?”
“I want to let her fucking suffer,” Lu said with no malice, “but since I’ll be destroying her son, I think I owe her a heads-up.” Lu didn’t tell her what else she had planned. No one needed to know that. It was between her and Lex, and it was the only way she could think of to save the man she loved some hurt.
Willa stood. “Let’s go,” she said. As they started to walk to the door, she added, “Is it OK if I strip Pete down and fuck his brains out?”
“Did you just admit that you want Pete Pellitteri?” Lu asked, not hiding her shock.
“Yes. I did. Are you surprised?”
“That you want him—absolutely not. That you are finally admitting it? Hell yes.”
“So,” Willa calculated, “will you tell me what Lex said?”
“Ugh, Will. You’re relentless,” Lu said, laughing, following her sister out of the funeral home. “Let’s go find those pesky Pellitteri boys.”
“Yes, lets!” Willa agreed. “Let’s do that.”
The Village had changed a lot since Lu’s younger days. Since she left at seventeen, she’d never really hung out at the bars in the small commercial district on Siesta Key. She did recognize that it had been infused with some upscale boutiques, a couple of bars and restaurants. They chose the Daiquiri Deck because of its open-air venue. The beautiful night was clear, humidity free and cool enough to lure people to sit outside. They left the house to the adults and drove to the bar as quickly as they could exit. Willa and Lu were happy with the choice because it meant they could walk home. It wasn’t like they could get too crazy, with the memorial service at ten o’clock in the morning.
Willa, Pete, Lex, Lu, Caroline, and Miguel were all that was left of the crowd. The talk of the table turned to soccer when Willa and Pete went to get drinks. Lu excused herself and headed to the bar to join them. Walking up to Pete, she grabbed his hand, squeezed it, and leaned in to him. “You doing OK?” she asked.
“Yup, Harvard, I’m doing OK,” he said with a sad smile.
“So many people were there today. Must have made your mother feel good.”
“More humbling than anything,” Pete responded. “But, yeah, I think it made a difference.”
Willa looked at her watch. “I think we should call it a night. I’ll get their drinks, then can we leave?” she asked Lu.
Lu didn’t hesitate. “Absolutely.”
“I’ll come with you,” Pete said. “Lex can swing by and get me when he’s ready. I think they’re talking business.”
“I got lost about two minutes into the conversation,” Lu said.
They each grabbed a drink from the bar and headed back to the table. Placing the drinks in front of their respective owners, Pete said, “We’re gonna walk to Will’s. Just swing by and get me when you’re ready.”
Lex looked at his brother, then at Lu. She was across from him, out of his reach. “You too?” he asked her.
“Yeah. I’m beat.” Lex nodded his head, seemingly accepting of her decision. Surprised, but relieved, Lu walked over and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’ll see you in the morning,” she said.
Lex merely turned his head, which was right next to her ear and whispered, “Before that.” With the din of the music and the swirling conversation, no one heard him but Lu.
Quickly withdrawing, she looked uneasily toward Pete and Willa. “Ready?”
They said their good nights and walked the half mile to Willa’s condo. Lu dropped back, lost in thought and trying to give Willa some space to operate. When they made it to the apartment, she quickly withdrew to her room, leaving Pete and Willa alone.
Willa was still debating, wondering if she should really try to seduce Pete. He interrupted her thoughts.
“I’m surprised Lex didn’t put up a fight when Lu left.”
“I’m not,” Willa responded. “He’ll end up here. He’s just biding his time.” Pete opened her sliding glass door and walked out on the balcony.
“Do you love hearing the water when you go to sleep and wake up?” he asked.
Standing a heartbeat away, Willa moved to his left and leaned on the railing, mimicking his stance. “You know I do.” She wanted to talk to him about Lu’s plan, but she wasn’t sure how to broach the subject. Over the last eight years, Willa and Pete had, by mutual, silent agreement, avoided the subject of their siblings. It just seemed simpler not to talk about it. Willa had always been afraid that Pete secretly hated what Lu had done, what she agreed to, and she didn’t want to have to defend her sister. But suddenly she needed to talk to him about it.
“What do you think Lex is going to do when he finds out about Nina?”
Dropping his head in his hands, he looked completely distraught. Rolling his head to the side, he caught her eye. “I feel like I am waiting for Armageddon to occur.”
Willa didn’t mean to, but she smiled. “Nice.”
“Fuck, Willa. We’re burying my father tomorrow. The people I’m closest to are going to come apart at the seams when this all gets revealed.” He sighed and looked back to the water. “There’s a good chance Lex will absolutely hate me, but I’m so relieved. I want him to know Nina.”
Willa knew there was more, so she stayed quiet—which was damn hard.
“Can we fast-forward past tomorrow and just get to the aftermath?” Pete asked.
Willa couldn’t resist any longer. She pulled his hand out of its clasp and locked her hand with his. She pulled him close, into a hug. She felt him stiffen, then relax into her. “Damn, Willa. What the hell are we going to do?”
“We’ll figure it out,” she murmured.
They didn’t talk for a while, just held each other. Pete’s hand started to move up and down her back and she willed herself to let him dictate this.
“Will,” he whispered, close to her ear, making her shiver with desire, “would it feel at all incestuous to you if I tried to kiss you?” He drew back and smiled at her.
And she burst into rippling laughter. “Ah, Petey, you really know how to get a girl hot.”
He laughed too. Then, he grabbed her gently by the back of her neck, pulled her forward and kissed her. And it was good. Very good. Not at all incestuous and not at all the little Petey that she had grown up with. When he ended the kiss, she grabbed his hand and led him to her room.
“Stay here tonight, Pete.”
“OK. But Willa”—he stopped her, grabbed both of her hands, and kissed her briefly—“this can’t go any further tonight.” He kissed her again to take the sting out of his words. “Tomorrow we are going to be operating in a whole new world. We need to take this slow.”
Willa was about to protest. Pete stopped her by laying his index finger across her lips. “Listen to me. I already love you. We have an amazing niece together. But my brother and your sister are about to destroy each other. I just can’t do this now when—” He stopped. “Armageddon. I know this isn’t you, but can we do this my way?”
Willa was burning up with desire. Always the impulsive one, she wanted to have him now. But Pete was the reasonable one—the one who tempered Lex. And just as he was the voice of reason so much when they were growing up, what he said made sense. Her blue eyes burned hot.
With his finger still on her lips, he begged, “Please don’t make this harder for me than it already is.”
His big chocolate eyes were impossible to resist. She reached up and gently took hold of the hand that had rested lightly on her mouth. “OK. But you better be really fucking good,” she said with characteristic bluntness.
Laughing, he leaned forward and branded her with a scalding kiss. “You don’t need to worry about that!”
Willa led him to her room. She got ready for bed, he texted Lex. Then he wrapped himself around her and fell into a contented sleep.
11
Lex couldn
’t remember ever being so exhausted. The last couple of days had finally caught up with him. But as he crossed the threshold of Willa’s condo, a startling energy coursed through him—his proximity to Lu instantly registering. He needed her. Surprised to find the living room empty of his brother, he sat lithely on the couch.
He’d been warned off by everyone, his mother, Caroline, Dr. A., and Willa. The vehemence of their positions gave him some pause. Their concerns were valid. They beat at him now as his body continued to strum with unreleased desire. He would return to England, she would stay here. While baby genius Lu was super intelligent, she wasn’t worldly. He would hurt her. His world wasn’t made for a tenure-track professor. How could he leave her behind again?
He’d heard it all and he’d listened. He’d even thought briefly about leaving without making love to Lu. But how could he? Maybe Pete was right about this being just familiarity and grief. Did he just want her because he was home and it felt like he should be with her because his memories of Sarasota were all wrapped up with her? He didn’t think that was it, but he couldn’t be sure of anything at this point. His objectivity on the subject didn’t exist.
He thought back on the day. She had been there for him every moment he needed her. As if she could sense his lapses of composure, she would send him an encouraging smile or lightly touch him (which about drove him insane). Even having Pete around didn’t bring him the kind of peace that Lu’s presence provided. What did that mean? Why did his fingers itch to touch her and his heart long to know her? A little unnerved by the direction of his thoughts, governed by an innate sense of self-preservation, Lex thought about the one thing that gave him balance. She still needed to explain what happened when he left. He needed to know why she gave up on him and their plan. Remembering that betrayal helped him rein in his overwhelming feelings for her.
Suddenly noticing that Pete wasn’t sleeping on the sofa that he was sitting on, he wondered if he had misread the text Pete sent him. Pulling his phone from his pocket, he looked at it again. Confirming what he thought he knew, he wondered where Pete was sleeping. Then it dawned on him. Pete was sleeping in Willa’s bed. Lex let out a soft chuckle. Finally. In the midst of all this confusion, things seemed right in the world.
Running his hands over his face and leaning deeper into the couch, he contemplated leaving Lu alone. He was convinced that she was deeply involved with someone. It was the only explanation for her reticence. Because, let’s face it, he knew she wanted him too. Smiling at his arrogance, the trait his father liked best and least about him, he stood up and made his way to Lu’s room.
The sight that greeted him didn’t disappoint. She was so innocently sexy that she sent his heart sputtering in his chest as he imagined himself sliding into her. He closed the door to her bedroom and leaned back on it. Lying on her stomach, her black hair fanned out behind her over the pillow with strands covering her neck. Her right leg, long and straight, while her left leg was bent and a pillow spanned her stomach—a habit he remembered from when she was six. He knew his hand would be traversing those long legs momentarily and he was instantly hard. As he imagined all the ways he would have her, her eyes opened and she looked directly at him. She was wide awake.
“Playing possum, Lu?” he asked. Although he wanted to go to her, he remained where he was, leaning on the door.
She smiled warily as she moved to sit up.
“Don’t!” Lex said, a little too sharply.
Lu froze, watching him with wide eyes. She wasn’t lying down anymore, but she wasn’t sitting up.
Lex pushed himself off the door and made his way to her. “I was just imagining running my hands up your leg, from toe to thigh.” Still moving toward her with panther-like grace, his voice soothing, he gently pushed her back down onto the bed. Then he knelt on the side and starting at her toes, he ran his right hand all the way up the length of her leg and back down again. He repeated the motion, but this time continued up her body, groaning when he encountered her thong, but seeking her back and lightly stroking her. “We need to lose this shirt and these,” he whispered, running his hands under her thong, then leaning over and pulling her ear lobe into his mouth.
Lu, who had continued to watch him warily, closed her eyes as desire overwhelmed her. She didn’t know where the thought came from, but her brain continued to fight, while her body was screaming, “Resistance is futile!” She smiled, which Lex immediately noted. Kissing her neck, between her lobe and her jaw, he continued with his perusal.
“Turn over for me, baby,” he said, moving his hand down her back. When she did, he lifted her tank top up, prodding her to lift her head up. He threw the shirt to the side, then moved down and discarded her underwear. Then he took in his first glance of her body. “God, Lu, you are beautiful,” he murmured. He couldn’t stop his hands from gliding over her, exploring her breasts. With a devilish smile, he looked directly at her and noted, “I liked your sixteen-year-old breasts, but these”—he looked down, then back up at her while his hands found her nipples—“these are a definite upgrade.”
Mortified but not surprised that Lex was cracking jokes, she briefly considered sitting up. But Lex anticipated her reaction and bent down to take a nipple in his mouth. As he gently drew on her, he watched her with his laughing eyes. Lu was powerless to do anything. He watched her melt into it, her eyes heavy with desire, and his laughter died, just like that. He had an overwhelming need to kiss her. Pulling his mouth from her breast, he stood up. Lu, confused, opened her eyes and looked up at him. She still hadn’t said a word.
He pulled off his shirt and pants, stripping in a fluid motion, like he did everything else. Then he was beside her. And then on top of her between her legs, his face even with hers. He kissed her gently. “Lu, I want to take this slow and worship every inch of your body.”
She heaved a stuttering breath, her body so wet and ready for him that she didn’t think she could take much more.
“But I can’t wait that long. I meant it today. I need to be inside of you,” Lex said.
Again, Lu didn’t say anything. She merely watched him with her too-old eyes. Her fingers were stroking his head, playing with the bristles of his hair.
He kissed her again. He knew she was ready for him. Her heat surrounded him. He could smell her desire.
“Talk to me, baby,” he prompted, but then he kissed her again, stealing her breath. His hips moved between her legs, bringing him in contact with her heat. “Lu?” he said, the question evident in his voice. He realized then that he needed her to want this. He wanted her to want him as much as he wanted her. And ego aside, he needed to hear it or see it or feel it.
Lu continued to stare at him. His arms were starting to shake as he held himself back. Then the most bizarre thing happened. Her eyes filled with tears and he groaned in frustration and fell on top of her, rolling out from between her legs.
Neither one of them said anything, and the room filled with an uncomfortable silence. Then Lex rolled out of bed, pulled on his pants, and walked out onto the balcony.
Lu stayed in bed, fighting the urge to go to him. If she went to him, they would have sex. All he needed was for her to say yes. He’d been breaking her down, slowly, surely. But he had needed her to capitulate totally—that was just Lex. It was always, had always been, all or nothing with him. She wanted to, but how much worse would it be when she told him about Nina? And how many times could she have this argument with herself?
Not able to stand the distance between them, she got out of bed and picked up his shirt off the floor. Slipping her arms in, she quickly fastened a couple of buttons and walked out to the balcony. She leaned against the door jamb and took in the view.
Perfection. His elbows resting on the railing. He gazed out at the gulf as it rolled gently against the sand, beating a gentle rhythm. Sliding in and rolling back out—erotic images filled Lu’s brain, and she thought she might combust right there. His athlete’s body rippled with muscle. Ink scrolled all over his b
ack. She hadn’t known he had any tattoos. Fascinated, she moved closer. Without meaning to she began tracing the lines of the intricate pictures detailed on his body.
She felt him stiffen, but he didn’t say anything, so she didn’t either. Her fingers continued to peruse his back. A weird band spanned his upper back, from his left shoulder blade to his right. Probably Celtic, but she couldn’t be sure. His number, seven, was on the lower left side of his back. He had Italian and Cuban flags, intertwined, a tribute to his heritage. It should have appeared crowded and incongruent, but somehow it all fit together.
“You followed Dr. J.’s tattoo rule?” she murmured, fascinated with her exploration of his body.
He didn’t answer her at first and she didn’t blame him. He’d tried to get her to talk and she’d left him hanging.
“Yes,” he said simply.
She stopped moving her hands, allowing them to rest lightly on both of his hips. Then, as if in a trance, she moved forward and kissed his back, on his spine. Then slid her tongue down his body until she reached the waistband of his pants.
His body grew taut. She could feel him struggle. She knew his frustration with her; she was frustrated too. But she knew she needed to be with him. Before she did anything else, she wrapped her arms around him and leaned into his back. “I need you to promise me something,” she said.
He drew a ragged sigh. “I don’t think I can make you any promises, Lu. I wish I could.”
“Let me say this, Lex,” she begged, her forehead resting on his back, her arms still around him, but a small gulf existed between their bodies.
Taking another fortifying breath, he said, “I’m all ears, Lu.”
At any other time, she knew, he would be saying that with a smile. “I need you to promise me that after the memorial service tomorrow, when everyone clears out, that you can give me some time.”
She could feel his hesitation. “Lu, I’ve let it go. We don’t need to go back over the past.” He didn’t want this to be about the past. He needed to hold on to that to keep some perspective.