by Casey Peeler
As we make our way to the farm, I take every opportunity to touch her, and she lets me. She laughs at my jokes and my attempt at singing. When I hear the first beat of her song, I know it’s time to show her how much she already means to me.
Doing the only thing I should do, I pull the truck off the side of the two-lane highway. There’s not too much traffic, and hell, I don’t care if it is a major city interstate. Leaving the engine running, I hurry not to waste any time, yank open her door, and pull her into my body as we dance to the beat of the music like this song was meant only for us.
She sings the words as we dance, and I can’t help but fall harder for her. As the last beat ends, I raise my hand to her cheek. I want to tell her that I’ve been in love with her since I was five, but I can’t do that. She’ll think I’m off my rocker. Instead, I pull her lips to mine and kiss her like I’m meeting her in my dreams. When we break away, a small grin begins to escape her lips, and I know she feels it, too.
I take her by the hand and lead her back to the truck. On my way back to the driver’s side, I want to holler, but that would be too obvious. Once I jump into the seat, I look into those emerald eyes and smile. She mirrors my smile, and we make our way back to her farm.
After turning onto the long driveway leading to their farmhouse, she places her hand on my forearm. “Thank you, Em.”
I put the truck into park and move to look at her. “No, thank you, Raegan.” I lean in and kiss those lavish lips one more time because there’s no way I’m getting a shotgun pointed at me on that porch again. She bites her lip as I pull away, and I know I want to attack them again, but question her instead. “Rae, do I have to let you go?”
“No, but there could be a shotgun waiting on ya if you don’t,” she says, looking toward a newly lit room. Let her go. There’s a bullet with your name on it.
I let out a small laugh before I kiss her quickly once more and take her to the front door. Once we are on the porch, she takes her time, like she’s waiting for more, but I can’t, not with Mr. Lowery waiting on the other side of the door ready to scare me to death again. As if she understands, she tells me she’ll see me tomorrow. I toss her a wink and head back to my truck.
As soon as I make it out to the main road, I crank up the radio and smile, because I know Raegan feels the same way. Once I’m home, I grab a drink and a bag of chips before watching SportsCenter on ESPN and calling it a night. At some point, I wake up to the TV still on and chip crumbs on the couch. Dang! Mom’s gonna kill me. I quickly clean up my mess and make my way to my room. Just as I’m about to meet Raegan in my dreams, the house phone rings, and everybody knows that a phone call this late at night can never be good.
I hurry to the hallway to see what’s going on when Mom meets me halfway.
“Em, Cole’s been in an accident. I don’t know much. All I know is it’s not real good right now. Throw on a shirt and let’s go,” she says with distress in her voice.
“Yes, ma’am.” I hustle to my room, slide on the first shirt and pair of shoes I can find and meet George and her in the car. Rae. I’ve gotta call Rae!
“George, can I call Rae? I think she and Mr. Lowery would wanna be there,” I say with a little hesitation in my voice.
“Please,” he says.
Chapter 11
Raegan
Waking up to the sound of my phone vibrating on the nightstand, I see Emmett’s name, and I can’t help but smile, even though I feel like I’ve been run over by a Mack truck.
“Hey,” I mumble half-asleep, but attempting to sound like I’m awake.
“Rae! It’s Cole! He’s been in an accident,” he races to say with terror in his voice. I realize it’s not morning, and I pray I’m not reliving a nightmare that occurred twelve years ago.
“Em, we’re on our way. Do we need to get you?”
“No, I’m with George and Mom,” he says.
“I’m getting Gradaddy now.” I press End on my phone, toss it onto my bed, and run to Grandaddy’s room.
“Grandaddy! We’ve got to go to the hospital. It’s Cole. He’s been in an accident.” Grandaddy sits up in a hurry when he hears the word “accident,” and I know he’s reliving more vividly what I barely remember.
“Get dressed and meet me in the kitchen in five.”
Shutting the door, I run to my room, toss on my shorts from tonight, a bra, tank top, and pull on my boots. I don’t bother with my hair, teeth, or anything. Instead, I grab a ball cap and hurry to meet Grandaddy.
He walks in right after me. I toss him the keys, and we haul ass to get to Cole in time. I swear, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think my grandaddy was a NASCAR driver. He puts the truck in the wind, and we are at the local hospital in a matter of minutes. We find a parking spot and hustle to the front doors. As they slide open, I see Emmett and his mom standing there. I run to his arms.
“He’s gonna be okay, right?” I ask as I sob in his arms.
“We don’t know. It’s a waiting game. His dad’s back there right now,” he answers as I pull back and wipe the tears.
Grandaddy turns to Emma, Emmett’s mom. “Can I go back there?”
“I’m sure, Dover. You’re family,” she says quietly.
“Sunshine, I’ll be right back.” He looks directly at Emmett. “Don’t let her outta your sight.”
“Yes, sir.”
Grandaddy makes his way to the nurses’ desk and into the back. Emmett pulls me close, and I take a seat with him and his mom. Never in my life did I expect to sit in the hospital waiting room, waiting to find out a family member’s fate from another car accident.
We wait for what feels like an eternity before George and Grandaddy walk out. Cole’s dad looks like hell, and Grandaddy is putting on a show, but I can read his emotions like a book.
“How is he?” I ask. They don’t’ say anything; they just walk toward us. Please, God, no! “Grandaddy?!” I scream. He walks up to me, squeezes my hand, and looks me in the eye. Oh my god! Please tell me he’s not gone. I feel my breathing increase, and I’m on the verge of hyperventilating.
“Sunshine, slow down. Take a deep breath,” he says calmly. I try to do as he says, but fear consumes my body. I can’t do this again. “He’s gonna be a’ight. It’s gonna take a while, but he will pull through.” I crumble in Grandaddy’s arms as tears of joy pour from my eyes. “Do you wanna go see him?”
“Yeah, but shouldn’t Em and his mom go first?” I ask as I look around to his family. His dad informs us that Emmett and I should see Cole now, because they are going to be here all night and will see him when we come out.
I look at Grandaddy as Emmett waits for me. “It will be okay, Sunshine. I promise.” Then, Emmett takes me by the hand, and we walk to face Cole in a hospital bed.
Once Emmett and I are alone in the hallway, he turns to look at me. “Are you okay?” I shake my head yes. “I don’t believe you.”
“I just never pictured coming back to this place for another accident. It’s like someone’s playing a sick joke on us,” I say. He wraps his arm around my shoulder, pulls me close, kisses my forehead, and we make our way to Cole.
Emmett
Once we arrive at the hospital, George goes back to see Cole. Mom decides to give them a little privacy, and we take a seat in the waiting area.
“Mom, you can go with him if you want. I can wait on Mr. Lowery and Rae out here.”
She shakes her head no. “George and Cole are a pair. They have been each other’s rocks since his mom left all those years ago. They need time to themselves. George will assess the situation and come get us if he thinks it’s that bad.”
I start to comment, but then I see the doors open. She looks pale as a ghost and almost on the verge of breaking. When her eyes meet mine, I see into her soul. She’s afraid of what might happen if she loses someone else. Running into my arms like I’m her saving grace, she begins to cry, and between sobs, she asks if he’s gonna be okay.
Mr. Lowery asks Mom i
f he can go back there, and she agrees. He makes sure I understand I’m in charge of Raegan, and that makes me feel worthy to have her, but scared at the same time.
We take a seat and wait for them to return, and it feels as if time is standing still. As they emerge from the hallway, they look like relief is washed over them. We stand to meet them. They inform us that Cole will make it, but he will have to stay here for a little while. Then, George tells Raegan and me to go back first. I look at Mom, but she insists.
Once we are alone, I ask her if she is okay. She shakes her head yes, but I don’t believe her one bit. She says what I knew she was thinking. She’s terrified of what will happen when she walks through those doors.
Chapter 12
Raegan
As we walk into Cole’s room, I brace myself for what I might see. Trying to make it the worst-case scenario will at least lighten the actual results, even if they are bad.
When Emmett opens the door, I take a deep breath and see Cole lying in a hospital bed looking lifeless. There are cords attached everywhere, the room is dimly lit, and I stare at his chest to see if it is moving.
Walking toward the bed, I see his eyes are opening, and he’s trying to look at us. I let go of Emmett and hurry to his side.
“Cole, it’s me,” I say as I grab his hand in mine. He starts to speak. “Shhh…Don’t talk.” He ignores me.
Softly, Cole says, “Rae, I’m so sorry. You shouldn’t have to be here like this again.”
“Stop, Cole. I’m just glad you’re all right,” I counter as I begin to cry again. Emmett walks closer and pulls me tighter while I continue to hold onto Cole’s hand. We don’t say anything else; we just silently pray he’s going to be okay. After about twenty minutes of silence, Emmett says we probably should let the others come in. I shake my head and lean over Cole, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “I love you, Cole.” He tells me he loves me, too, and Emmett informs him he will return later.
Grandaddy, George, and Emma are waiting for us when we walk back into the waiting area. We don’t say a lot, but his parents go back into the room after they insist that Emmett goes home.
As the three of us make our way out to the parking lot, we all slide into Grandaddy’s truck. We drive toward Emmett’s house, and after we drop him off, I’m taken back in time to when I made this journey with my grandaddy after the funerals, but instead of Johnny Cash, I hear Luke Bryan’s “Drink A Beer,” and I’m blessed that Cole is still with us. Grandaddy doesn’t say a word; he pats my thigh, letting me know he understands and assuring me it’s gonna be all right.
Once we get to the farm, we make our way inside and back to bed. It won’t be long before the sun comes up. I set my alarm, because I know even though it’s Sunday, there is still work to be done before church.
I wake up to the sound of my alarm, and my body feels as if it has just fallen back asleep. I take a deep breath before pushing the cover aside and doing what has to be done.
Emmett
As we walk into Cole’s room, everything is in slow motion. I’m not an emotional guy, but knowing a family member is lying there fighting for his life puts things into perspective.
Cole looks peaceful in the bed, but almost to the point it’s scary. I know he’s a fighter, and I know he’s awake. Glancing at Raegan, I can see the horror on her face as she watches to see if his chest is rising. When she sees movement, she walks toward the bed, and I let her go. I don’t know how deep their connection runs, but I can tell he knows the real Raegan like I do.
As she begins to talk to Cole, I want to hurry to her side, but I also want to give them a moment. When tears begin to stream down her face again, I can’t hold back any longer. I stand beside her, hold her tightly, and smile down at Cole. I’m not a guy that puts his feelings out there, and Cole gets that, so no words are exchanged.
Silence fills the air, and when it begins to smother me, I tell Raegan we should let Mom come back for a while. Before we walk out of the room and toward the waiting area, she gives Cole a kiss on the cheek, and I squeeze his hand.
George and Mom tell me to go home and rest, but I want to stay. They don’t give me an option, and Mr. Lowery gives me a ride home. The ride to the house is quiet, but I lock my pinky into Raegan’s. She smiles at me, and the only sound we hear is the local country station.
Once we’re at the house, I open the door, thank Mr. Lowery, and tell Raegan I’ll call her in the morning. She smiles, and the fact I can’t touch my lips to hers drives me crazy. There is no way I’d do that in front of Mr. Lowery, although I’m pretty sure he’s reading my mind.
Watching Raegan and Mr. Lowery leave in the truck is rough. I know I’m walking into an empty house and unsure of when things will return to normal. When I can no longer see the taillights, I close the door and make my way inside. I don’t bother going to my room; I just sprawl out on the couch and drift off to sleep.
Chapter 13
Raegan
After tossing on some old clothes and pulling my hair from my face, I make my way outside to the barn. As I enter the barn, I grab the buckets and fill them with feed and start my rounds when Grandaddy enters.
“Mornin’, Sunshine. How are ya?” he says.
“I’m a’ight. Well, actually, I’m worn slap out, but it’s all good,” I say truthfully.
He takes several buckets of feed as well and starts at the other end of the stalls. He makes his way to the pig trough, and I take a basket to gather the eggs. Once we are finished, we walk inside the house to clean up and eat breakfast.
“Rae, are you up to church this mornin’?” he asks between sips of coffee.
“Yeah, but after church, I think I might need a nap,” I say.
“I’m right there with ya. We can go visit Cole on our way home from church. Maybe we should take George and Emma lunch. I think I’ll call and see if that works for them.”
“Okay.” We finish breakfast, and I clean the kitchen before getting ready for church. I want to call Emmett, but I’m afraid he might be sleeping. I’d hate to wake him if he was, so I decide to shower and get ready first and then call him.
As the scalding water runs over my body, I feel a wave of relief and refreshment. I could stay in this spot forever, but eventually, I’d turn into a prune. Then, the relief is replaced with memories of last night. I try to push them to the side, but I can’t. Closing my eyes, I see Cole lying in the hospital bed, and when I open them, I can still hear Emmett’s voice in my head. Tears begin to stream down my face as I try to escape my current situation. Yet again, someone I love is hurt due to an accident. I just pray this is where it ends. I don’t know if I can be strong much longer, especially if something happens to Grandaddy. As a sob expels from my lungs, I reach deep within my soul. I have to be strong. They both need me. I take a deep breath and hold it as the water pours down my face. As I exhale the air from my lungs, I turn off the water, grab a towel, and dry off quickly before getting ready for church. Once I’m finished, I pick up my phone and text Emmett.
Me: Em, just wanted to let you know you were
on my mind. Call me when you wake up.
Within minutes, my phone rings, and I hear the raspy, yet tender voice of Emmett on the other side.
“Mornin’, Rae. Are you okay?” he asks.
“I’m okay, but the question is, how are you?” I hope he can’t sense what I have been feeling all morning.
He doesn’t say anything for a moment. “I feel like I’ve been run over, but hearing your voice makes everything better.” I smile at the thought of my voice making him better.
“I understand that completely. I’m goin’ with Grandaddy to church and to see Cole after. Have you heard anything this mornin’?” I question.
“Yeah, Mom called and said he is comfortable and making some improvements. They said they hoped he would go home in a day or two if his improvements continue. I’m goin’ by there in just a few.”
“I’ll see you there in a little while then. We’
re bringin’ lunch, too.”
“Y’all don’t have to do that,” he says.
“Yeah, we do. Y’all need to eat, and I’m sure someone can only eat so much hospital food.” We both laugh, and that feels good.
Relieved that Cole is going to be okay, Emmett and I talk for a few minutes. I enjoy living in the present and not thinking about last night. Cole was lucky; I was lucky because he’s the only one that knows the secret, and I can’t make it through this without him.
Emmett
As the sun begins to peer through the curtains into my eyes, I roll over on the couch, feeling like I’ve been sleeping on a piece of plywood and a transfer truck has run over my body. It’s no use to try to get comfortable. I look at my phone to see if I’ve missed anything, but nothing’s there.
Sitting up, I take a moment to rub my eyes, and call Mom to see how Cole is doing.
“Hey, Mom. How’s he doin’ this mornin’?” I question.
“Better. They hope he’s gonna be able to go home in a few days, even though he won’t be able to go to work for at least a week or more. I don’t know how we’re gonna keep him from the farm,” she says with a hint of laughter in her voice, and that’s how I know it will all be okay. After telling her I’ll be by in a little while, we hang up. I toss my phone onto the table and lie back down, closing my eyes for just a few more minutes.
Somehow I drift back to sleep, but wake up to the buzzing of my phone. Still half-asleep, I fumble around the table, trying to grab it. Got it! I look down to see Raegan’s name, and I’m suddenly awake and feeling like a million bucks. After giving her a quick call, we hang up, and I smile, knowing I’ll see her today. I hustle to shower and get to the hospital.
Chapter 14
Raegan
Grandaddy and I enjoy church and are asked a gazillion questions about Cole. Of course, everyone thinks alcohol was involved, but it wasn’t. Cole’s smarter than that. I swear, some people are just idiots.
Once church is over, we pull through KFC for a family meal and make our way toward the hospital. I sneak a potato wedge from the bag.