A Love Like This (Book 1)

by Lane, Kimberly

  “I’ve been here a few times before so she knows----” Mike stops mid sentence. His face looks as if he just witnessed someone kicking a puppy. I turn around and see Tucker standing a few feet from our table.

  “Why don’t you tell Leila how well you know Kim,” Tucker says.

  “Well this is a surprise,” I say. “Would you like to join us?” Tucker’s eyes are glued to me as he pulls up a chair. Mikes face is twisted with annoyance.

  “You look gorgeous,” Tucker says looking into my eyes making my stomach turn cartwheels.

  “Thank you,” I say. “What are you doing here?”

  “Just stopped by to pick up take-out and I saw you two so I decided to say hello.”

  “Well you’ve said hello. You can go now,” Mike says.

  Tucker turns to Mike, “Let’s ask Leila if she wants me to leave.”

  “We don’t need to ask Leila. We’re on a date, you’re being rude and if you weren’t my boy I’d kick your ass.” They both turn to me and I nearly pee on myself from anxiety.

  “Mike and I are out as friend’s and I’m not about to get in the middle of this pissing contest.” They continue to argue spitting obscenities at each other in hushed tones. They don’t seem to notice me grab my purse and stand to leave. I march to the bathroom and call Sarah.

  “Come and get me please,” I say rather than hello.

  I explain what happened and after laughing for around ten minutes she agrees to come and pick me up. I walk into a stall; line the toilet with a handful of seat covers and sit down to play a round of angry birds on my smart phone. Sara sends me a text saying she’s out front. I leave the bathroom and look over at the empty table where I left Mike and Tucker.

  Kim the waitress bounces over to me before I get to the front door. “Your friends are waiting out front.” She touches my arm as I turn to walk away. “May I ask you a personal question?” She asks looking slightly bothered. “Which one of those guys are you dating?”

  “Wow that is personal,” I say and smile sweetly before spinning around on my heels and walking towards the door.

  I step out into the damp San Francisco air and see Mike, Tucker and Sarah standing a few feet from the restaurant’s entrance. Here I was thinking that I would be able to get through my last year and half of school with little to no social interaction. Then out of nowhere I have two handsome men fighting for my attention. Mike is fun loving, good-looking and would be a blast to hang out with but he would never really commit. Tucker probably wants a relationship but he comes with a lot of baggage. I’m too young to be looking for a commitment anyway maybe a little fun would be good for me. As I approach the group I see Tucker and Mike staring at me with their mouths agape.

  “What,” I say looking down to see if I have toilet paper on my shoes. I touch my nose to make sure there’s nothing hanging around there.

  Sarah leans over and whispers in my ear, “We can see your boobies and your head lights are on.”

  I look down gasp mortified and cup both breasts in my hands. I straighten my stance and say, “Good night gentlemen,” before rushing off towards Sarah’s car. Tucker runs after me, grabs my arm, twirls me around and kisses me hard. His hand feels hot on my bare back and I can hear my heart pounding in my ears as I wrap my arms around his neck and return his kiss. Needless to say my lust for Mike completely disappears.

  He pulls away and says, “That’s the tip I wanted.”

  “So corny,” I whisper.

  He kisses me again and my head is spinning. All outside noises are blocked out and replaced by the thump of my heart. We are probably only standing here for a few second but it feels like forever. I’m still a bit dazed when Mike snatches Tucker away from me and punches him square in the face. Tucker must be caught off guard by the punch because he just stands there looking shocked for a moment. The fog lifts and Tucker charges at Mike. I’m stupefied watching the two wrestle around on the ground. If there was a water hose nearby I would turn it on both of them. Instead I shake my head and walk away to stand next to Sarah’s car while she pries them apart. Sarah points at Mike and Tucker and says something I can’t decipher. They cross their arms over their chests defiantly. Sarah ambles over to the car and hands me the keys. “You should drive, I’m a little stoned.

  “What did you say to them?” I ask as I climb behind the wheel.

  “I told them they were both idiots and that they needed to stop acting like a bunch of horny adolescence and make a decision.”

  “What do you mean make a decision? I believe I have a say in the matter.”

  “They need to choose who is going to pursue you otherwise it’ll ruin their friendship.”

  “If you had to choose between Mike and Tucker who would you choose?” I ask.

  She doesn’t hesitate. “Mike without question.”

  “Why,” I ask as I merge past the toll booths on the Bay Bridge.

  “Tucker’s like my brother. He’s a nice settle down kind of guy and I’m not interested in a serious relationship. Besides that Mike is fine as fuck and he looks like he does what he does well.”

  “Something is wrong with you,” I say as we pull into a fast food drive through and scan the menu for chocolate cake. “By the way how did you get to the restaurant so quickly?”

  “I called him,” she says apologetically.

  “I kind of figured that. What are the chances of Tucker randomly showing up at the exact moment we sit down for dinner?”

  “After I called him I knew he would rush over. I was already on the freeway when I got your call. I headed over just in case you needed me. Are you mad?”

  “Nope I’m not mad, but the one thing I can’t figure out is why.”

  “Why what,” Sarah asks as she peruses the menu.

  “Why are Tucker and Mike trying so hard to get my attention?”

  “It’s so cute that you don’t realize how hot you are,” Sarah says.

  I sneer, “You’re nuts,” I say smiling to myself.

  Chapter 6

  Nickie is sitting perfectly still on Damian’s bed with her knees pressed against her chest. She takes nervous glances in his direction and recites her favorite poems in her head as he lectures her.

  To Aziz: Song of Mohammed Ahram:

  You are not kind to me, but many are

  And all their kindness does not make them dear

  It may be you deceive me when afar

  Even as always, you torment me near.

  Kashmiri Song

  I would have rather felt you round my throat,

  Crushing out life, than waving me farewell.

  Nickie watches Damian pace the floor ranting about seemingly nothing. “Why can’t I leave him?” she thinks dazed from the pain in her ribs.

  “Do you hear me Nickie?” Damian shouts. His face grotesque and contorted into a monster she doesn’t know.

  “Yes I hear you,” She whispers dryly trying to remember why she loves him. He continues to lecture. She drifts off again:

  Maya Angelou- Some kind of Love Some Say

  “is it true the ribs can tell

  The kick of a beast from a

  Lover’s fist? The bruised

  Bones recorded well

  The sudden shock, the

  Hard impact. Then swollen lids,

  Nickie looks at Damian with tear filled eyes. His face is back to normal now. “Look at your arms,” he says sympathetically. ”Why do you make me do this to you? I won’t hit you again I promise, just try to be more respectful of me and of our relationship.” He hands her a bag of frozen peas for her bruises. Nickie isn’t sure how she disrespected their relationship so she doesn’t know how to prevent from doing it again. The first time he hit her she swore she’d never talk to him again. Dana told her that if a man hits you there’s no telling what else he’d do to you. She knew th
at if her family found out they’d literally kill him. And if she even mentions it to Keisha forget about it. That girl could be more vindictive and mean than any man. So she applied heavy cover-up to hide the marks he left from punching her and decided to never call him again.

  Sorry eyes, spoke not

  Of lost romance, but hurt.

  Hate often is confused. Its

  Limits are in zones beyond itself.

  But he called her constantly after that first beating. He said that he loved her so much that he went crazy over the thought of losing her. He became attentive and passionate even fun loving in the weeks that followed. The next time he hit her she thought she must have done something to make him angry. She told herself that if she did what he asked he wouldn’t have a reason to punch her arms, chest and legs. He never hit her face, never wanted to confront the pain he’d caused. Their relationship wasn’t sexual. In fact they rarely had sex. He told her that he wanted to wait until they were married. She believed him. He told her that she was a slut for pressuring him to have sex. She believed that to. Her spirit was broken a little more with each embarrassing painful blow.

  And

  Sadists will not learn that

  Love, by nature, exacts a pain

  Unequalled on the rack.”

  “I don’t want to lose you,” he says brushing her tears away. “Do you know how much I love you?” He asks gently stroking her smooth tan face. Nickie touches the hand that rests on her cheek without malice and nodes yes. Later that night Nickie takes the train home in a fog. She walks into her studio apartment and gingerly lowers herself onto the couch. She can’t cry anymore. Her whole body is numb and she feels as if her life is spinning out of control. She sits on the couch for what feels like hours staring straight ahead blankly. The phone rings and snaps her out of her haze.

  “Girl pack up we’re going to see our baby.”

  ________

  My phone rings at 5 AM on a Friday morning. “Leila!” Sarah says covering her ears with a pillow. “Answer your phone.” The phone continues to ring. Sarah throws her pillow at me.

  “What,” I grown?

  “It’s your phone, wake up and answer your phone.” I look at the caller ID and sit straight up in bed. I try to steady my breathing before answering. “Did something happen? Why are you calling so early?” I say when I answer.

  “Girl nothing’s wrong. I’ve been calling you for days and you never respond.”

  “So you decide to call me at the ass crack of dawn?” I say lying back in bed. Sarah walks past me wearing a hello kitty eye mask pushed up to her forehead and a matching night shirt. She scratches her butt and farts as she passes my bed.

  “Was that you?”

  I exhale loudly and fan the air in front of me. “No Nick that was my roommate Sarah. I guess she’s punishing me for waking her. I’m sorry I haven’t called much lately. I’m starting to think that doubling up on classes wasn’t the best idea. I have no life and I’m pooped.”

  “Well since we can’t get you to come home we decided to surprise you and drive up. Put all your work aside because there will be none of that this weekend.”

  “Who is we,” I ask.”

  “Pookie and I are driving through the Grape Vine as we speak. We should be there in three or four hours. Keisha wanted to come but Doug can’t watch all those kids without help and Momma wouldn’t baby sit.”

  “Ok call me when you get closer,” I say and hang up.

  Sarah climbs back in bed. “Who’s coming?”

  “My uncle and sister are driving up from LA.”

  “Awesome, I’m finally gonna get you to go out.”

  “Since I know absolutely nothing about the area I guess you’re our tour guide for the weekend.”

  “Get ready for a wild ride,” Sarah says then rolls over and falls back to sleep almost instantly. I try to stay awake but soon I fall back to sleep as well.

  *****

  There’s a knock at the door around 9 AM. Sarah climbs out of bed stumbles over and answers. “Hey, you must be Sarah,” Pookie says hugging her. He walks past Sarah and plops down on the foot of my bed. “Get up girl! We’ve got places to go and people to see.”

  “Hey uncle,” I say sleepily. I sit up to hug him and Pookie wraps an arm around my waist and scoops me out of bed.

  “Oh my God honey you’re emaciated.” Pookie says placing his big brown hands around my waist. “What happened to the freshman fifteen?”

  “I’m a junior so it doesn’t apply.”

  Sarah chimes in, “She doesn’t eat--- all she does is study oh and hang out with the handicapped kids.”

  “Well that’s admirable baby but this,” he points to my waist, “will never do. You’re gonna have to start taking better care of yourself or I’m going to tell your mom--- or worst I’ll tell Keisha.”

  I don’t even want to think about having this conversation with Keisha, “Please don’t call her. I swear I eat. I’ve just been overwhelmed with school.”

  Oh well we’ll fatten you up over the weekend. “I brought you clothes from that boutique you like.” Pookie is a junior fashion editor for Glam Magazine. He is on top of all the latest trends and he gets samples of the hottest clothes before they come out in stores.

  “I wore the white dress. It was quite a hit. “

  “I’m sure it was a hit. What are you a D cup and you can’t wear a bra with the white one.”

  Before I can answer Nickie walks in smiling. “Hey girl, oh my God you’re skinny,” She says hugging me and kissing my cheek.

  “Where were you?”

  “I checked us into a hotel down the street and then Damian called to make sure we made it safely.” Without thinking I scrunch up my nose and roll my eyes. Pookie slaps my arm.

  Nickie glares at me, “What was that look about?”

  I scowl at Nickie and the room goes silent. I’ve told Sarah all about Nickie’s relationship with Damian. Sarah also knows that I don’t talk to Nickie very often because I can’t stand hearing about Damian. Sarah sits on her bed watching everyone frown at each other for a moment. Pookie turns to Sarah and mouths the word, “help.”

  She leaps off the bed, “Ok everybody pump the breaks. Here’s the plan for the day,” Sarah’s latest boy friend is Berkeley’s only white rapper so she’s immersed in all things slang. She walks around the room with her hands clasped behind her back as if she’s planning a military attack. “There’s a restaurant down the street that has the best pancakes I’ve ever had. We’ll walk over and have breakfast there. After that we’ll get all dressed up and go into the city. We’ll do the tourist thing during the day--- hang out at the pier and check out a few museums. The night will be amazing. I know of at least six parties plus I know the bouncers at a couple of clubs we can sneak Leila into.”

  I pick out sweats and a t-shirt then turn and walk into the bathroom to get dressed. Nickie sits down in a huff and starts texting Damian.

  “All right then Ms. Sarah looks like we’re following your lead,” Pookie says.

  We walk three blocks in the cool morning breeze past street vendors and clothing stores to Sophie’s Café. Sophie’s is a soul food restaurant in the heart of downtown Berkeley. The inside of the restaurant is painted bright yellow, orange, and green with brown trimming. The walls are covered with paintings for sale by local artists. There is a hole carved in the middle of the restaurant’s tile floor where a six foot tall tree grows. A full figured waitress with a blond Mohawk and a bored expression seats us at a table near the window and takes our orders. Nickie and Sarah order pancakes with walnuts and bananas. Pookie orders pancakes, oxtail stew, cheese grits, fried okra, French toast and fried chicken for him and me to share.

  “Jermaine Peterson, I cannot eat all of that. What’re you trying to kill me?”

  “Leila you need to eat, black girls
are not supposed to be this skinny.” He was right I was thinner than I’d ever been. I wasn’t trying to lose weight. I just never realized how much I relied on my mother and sisters for everything, even food. My mother always had a stocked fridge so I never ate out because I preferred her cooking to anything I’d find at a restaurant.

  Sophie’s Café starts to fill with customers. Pookie and I talk about his job and his latest relationship. Nickie and Sarah talk about school and all the parties going on tonight. Pookie stops talking midsentence and looks at Nickie and then back to me.

  “The two of you can stop the silent treatment. We came here to have fun damn it.”

  We are working extremely hard at ignoring each other. He picks up a fork from the table and points it at Nickie and then me. “I didn’t drive all the way out here for drama. Nickie we all hate Damian there it’s out now let’s move on with our lives.”

  “He was right, I shouldn’t have come here. You are all against him and he only wants what’s best for me.” I scoff and roll my eye towards the ceiling. She pushes back from the table and starts to leave.

  “Where are you going to go? You don’t know anyone here and you don’t know your way around.” She stands for a few seconds then sits down and folds her arms over her chest. “I don’t like the way he treats you. You’re a beautiful smart girl and you deserve better than some guy who tries to control your every move and who is clearly gay.”

  “He is not gay,” Nickie protests her face turning red.

  “I know more than one man who would beg to differ. I saw him at a club in Westwood.” Pookie stops talking while the waitress places our food on the table.

  Nickie leans over the table and whispers. “He was probably there entertaining a client.”

  “Yeah if by entertaining you mean screwing. His tongue was so far down that dudes throat----“

  “Stop,” Nickie says starting to tear up.

  I glanced over at Sarah. Her head is bouncing back and forth from Nickie to Pookie as they argue. I can tell that she’s loving the drama.

  “Look I won’t say anything else about Damian and Leila will watch her facial expressions. But I suggest you do a little investigating when we get back home. Now can we please just try to enjoy ourselves?” I don’t say anything even though I can feel all eyes on me. I didn’t realize how hungry I was. I’m shoveling food in my mouth without looking up or stopping to breathe. We all eat our food in silence for a few minutes trying to process the fact that Pookie just oust Damian in a crowded restaurant.