Mutually Exclusive

by Charlotte Winston

  She wrapped her arms around her chest to ward off the chill he projected. “Then why do you care about the house your biological mother died in? The cabin’s been in my family for generations; we go there every year. My father’s favorite place.” His hands rubbed the sides of her arms.

  “I know. Trina loved it, too,” he whispered before moving away. “She came to us months before she died, prior to the accident, spouting all this nonsense about how your father promised to take care of us. He wanted to leave his wife and be with her. Make us a family. She took us to the cabin for a weekend of bonding. My mom told me Trina was my biological mother and I needed to give her a chance.” His laughter held no humor.

  “She brought us to the house he shared with someone else—your mother—and they acted like it was normal. I saw the pictures of your happy family, and wanted to vomit. Here was the woman who’d birthed me. At worst, she was neglectful; at best, she was a distant aunt. And she wanted me to pretend it was normal to be having sex with a married man. And your father stood there as though he were doing nothing wrong, told me I’d have the father figure I’d always dreamed of, as though my aunt and uncle weren’t good enough. My adopted parents, who I called Mom and Dad.”

  His hands cupped her face, kissing her forehead. She couldn’t grasp the notion her father would leave her mother. This was worse than when she’d found out Santa Claus wasn’t real. Like he held all her dreams in her hand, ground them into dust, and let them float away on their way to the ground. “My parents were happy.”

  He kissed her forehead, one arm wrapped around her while his hand guided her head to his chest. She felt the comforting beat of his heartbeat underneath her ear and held on to him as though he were the last driftwood between her and drowning in the raging river. She wouldn’t contemplate how Roman felt more like home than she’d ever anticipated.

  “Can you be sure what went on in your parents’ marriage? How old were you when he died?”

  “Eight,” she whispered into his chest. “I’m not getting into their marriage with you but if you hated your biological mother, it doesn’t explain why you want the house.”

  “I’m going to destroy it.” She flinched at the vehemence in his words. “No matter how flawed, she was my birth mother, and your father took her and twisted all her dreams. He made her believe they were going to be together. He and the damn house drove her crazy and destroyed anything she could have been. She wasn’t sleeping, barely eating, and kept talking about how she couldn’t leave the house because of him. She came to me after your father died, swearing he hadn’t, and all we needed to do was wait a bit and he’d come back to her. I tried to explain it wasn’t even her house but she swore up and down your father wanted her there and I guessed no one was using it.” Alexandra moved away from him, rubbing her chest where she felt the pain from his words. Roman continued as though she wasn’t freaking out at his newest revelation. No way was her father still alive.

  “We both know it was a lie, but your damn father gave her hope, and as the months rolled by, it never sunk in with her. And I hated him. I know it may have been irrational, but he deserved my anger. My biological mother was weak, and he’d manipulated her. I overheard him the weekend we were there, telling someone on the phone he was enjoying his mint. She would be a great addition to his startup company. He was going to use her, and Trina was building castles in the sky.”

  The pounding in her ears was too much; she could barely hear, let alone function with all the information Roman had just thrown at her. She walked to the bed, sitting before she fell over. She’d entered into an agreement with a man who hated her father—the one man she’d always worshipped without question—stolen from her before she really had a chance to know him. The more she saw about her hero, the worse she felt, but she needed to know the true extent of him. “What company?”

  Roman shrugged. His face gave nothing away, and she’d give a million dollars to read his thoughts. “He never said, although he mentioned another star she’d worked with before. He looked up and saw me watching and told the other guy he would call him back. Then he patted me on the back and told me I couldn’t tell my mother what I’d heard. I assumed it was something dealing with the adult film industry. She quit when she started dating your father, but when she came to pick us up from my aunt, my true mother, she said everyone was clamoring for her to come back. She refused because she wanted to make a go of it with your father, but there was a lot of money at stake.”

  And the fun never ends. Alexandra couldn’t handle any more surprises about her father. “Why did she commit suicide?”

  Roman exhaled, as though the weight of the world was on his shoulders and he couldn’t hold it any longer. He sat beside her, slinging his arm over her shoulder and kissing her hair. She burrowed her face in his neck, inhaling his familiar scent. She wanted to lose herself in him, but needed to hear the rest of the explanation.

  “I got a phone call the day she died. She was crying, telling me he wasn’t coming back. I told her of course not your father was dead. But she said she got a letter from him and he considered her a liability. They could no longer be together despite wanting her, so it was her version of a ‘Dear John’. She cried, telling me she couldn’t go on without him, and I brushed off her threats. I told her she could, because she had two boys who needed a friend.

  “I already had a mother, but I wanted her in my life, you know? She was flawed, broken even, but there is still a little part of me who wanted the woman who swooped in and took me on an adventure a couple days a year to show she cared. And I hated him. You have no idea how much I hated him. For the devotion my mother showed him, and the bullshit he spewed, and how his supposed final words pushed her over the edge. She hung herself in the house you love so much, and I want it gone. Nothing good can come from keeping it. To your family, it represents love, and a disillusioned harmony they bullshit you into believing, but for me, it’s a reminder my mother didn’t love her children enough to fight through the issues she was dealing with. She gave her love to a man who was unavailable, and it killed her.”

  “Roman.” Alexandra moved his arm from across her shoulders. Her heart broke for the little boy who needed his birth mother, but she needed to understand where she fit in this story. “You had to know who I was before we started our agreement. Why would you have sex with the daughter of a man you hated?”

  Roman looked away, and a sense of unease ran through her the longer he sat silent. She lay her hand over his thigh, seeking the guy she’d been falling for, but he jumped as though he’d been burned. His hands ran through his head while he paced in front of her. “I told you no because you were his daughter. When you came in, I was still going to tell you no. You’re beautiful, but I didn’t need to get entangled with the daughter of Marcus Kane. But I couldn’t throw you to the wolves with our other patrons. When you offered the house, it sealed the deal. I’ve tried to buy the property for years, and knew if anyone could get me access you could.”

  “It’s mine,” she acknowledged. She probably shouldn’t disclose that tidbit, but the words were out before she could stop them. “I got it on my last birthday. We go there to remember my dad, usually on the weekend he died, and I hate it. I want to remember him doing something he loved, not in the house. I had no idea someone died there. My family…” She cleared her throat, composing herself. He walked to the mini fridge in the corner, grabbing her a bottle of water. She accepted, drinking it to clear the lump in her throat. How would she be able to talk about the lies?

  “They tried to protect my sister and me.” She felt her eyes water but carried on. “There’s no shame in protecting us.” He stayed quiet, and Alexandra wanted the ground to open and swallow her whole. She’d believed he cared about her. They’d spent time together in and out of bed, and were friends. But she now felt like a means to an end. To destroy a house. A piece of architecture in her family for generations, but something which held such pain for him he couldn’t stand the thought
of it even existing. He should have told her. She understood why he didn’t at first, but he had no excuse for lying when they started to become friends. And that hurt. Damn, she hurt.

  “I need to go.” He grabbed her hand, pulling her back down beside him.

  “Alexandra—”

  “No.” She shook her head. “I’m not running out, I’m not ending anything, but I need to go. Today was…enlightening to say the least, and I need to process. Without you angling for sex, or for a house I believed would go to an owner who wanted it. So I’m going to go. And you’re not going to follow me. Because you’re going to respect my decision to be alone right now. I will call you later this week and let you know what I’ve decided, because I don’t know if I can continue to have sex with a man who’s lied to me since the minute I met him.”

  “If we don’t continue it’s your choice, not mine. I kept up my end of the bargain; you better keep up with yours.” A punch to the stomach would have hurt less. He let her know where she fit in the equation. And she wanted a guy who may not be available. Someone lost to her long before she ever met him.

  14

  “Aren’t you stunning, as always?” Parker greeted Alexandra with a hug when she walked into the ballroom two weeks later. “I think your win has you glowing.” She smiled.

  Alexandra laughed; Parker was probably right. Since she’d nailed the Williams case, the company was able to proceed with going public. She couldn’t believe it, and this all but sealed the deal for her to become partner. She won the case, and she probably won the office she craved. Franklin had left her alone, and she got the results of her DNA test that morning. Negative. Whatever crazy idea she had about her father being alive were put to rest. Thank God. She was even having sex on the regular, even though no one knew about it.

  She’d seen Roman several times since she discovered why he wanted the house but it felt stilted, their earlier banter thrown to the wayside for sex only. The trial period was coming to a close fast, and she’d agreed to sell him the house when it was over. It was unsettling, since she’d been honest with him and he’d lied to her. She missed their old relationship. He’d been her constant companion prior to her discovering his true intentions and something more seemed to be brewing before she discovered his deception. It was a lie of omission, but it didn’t matter when she realized his true intent. He still continued to send her little gifts to her desk, generally of the X-rated variety, even though she wasn’t talking to him. She gained a new set of kettle balls, a pink pair of handcuffs, and the same kind of vibrator he used on her sometimes.

  Since I’m not with you, the note said sneakily. They were almost a couple, but not. Although sometimes at night, when she had lay there after a sweaty round of sex, she’d reach for his hand and he’d take it, communicating without words. It had somehow become more, but how do you take something based on lust and create a lasting relationship? Did she even want to after what she found out? A foundation built with sand, full of empty promises, sexual gratification, and lies, thrived at night so you didn’t have to face what you did in the daylight.

  “Thank you.” She smiled. “You two look gorgeous yourselves.” She hugged Parker’s fiancé Anthony, dashing in a three-piece suit, standing beside Parker so they looked like a pair of brunette dolls. Ready to play in Barbie’s funhouse, where all the wealthy, privileged people hung out, ignoring the gilded cage it represented. She took in the grandeur of the event, all there to celebrate her grandfather, amused at the opulence and money people tended to throw at these affairs, knowing they had so many skeletons in their own closet it would take a forklift to dig them out.

  She’d spoken to no one about what she learned of her father, wanting to get through the event before she breeched it with her mother. She laughed at the hypocrisy because nothing mattered as long as appearances were maintained. It was the same with Roman’s club. Half these people were members, she’d seen some of them herself, but no one would let on they’d been spread-eagle having a threesome the night before.

  “How are you?” Parker inquired after Anthony left to talk to some clients from work. “Gran and Papa said you should be a shoe-in for partner, and Mom has been walking around like they offered her the promotion.”

  “I know.” She squeezed Parker’s hand in excitement, the most emotion she’d be able to feel at this shindig. “Right now, it’s just a waiting game. I still have five months before they make a decision, but Henry pretty much told me the other day I have it.”

  “I knew you could do it,” Parker gushed. “Dad would be so proud.”

  “Thank you,” she whispered. Months before, she would have gotten emotional when talking about her father with her sister, but she couldn’t find it in herself to cry for a man who’d become an enigma. “But enough about me, what’s going on with the wedding?” After failing to find a venue Parker decided to have a destination wedding with only twelve guests in the Dominican Republic. There would be little preparation on their end because the resort took care of most of the details. It bummed Alexandra since she’d always dreamed of helping her sister plan a fairy-tale wedding. Her current schedule meant she wasn’t getting married anytime soon, so she wanted to live vicariously through Parker.

  “Amazing,” she said. “I am relaxed, and the resort has made the process as smooth as possible. All I have to do on this end is pick out my dress, as well as yours.”

  “When did you want to go?” Alexandra took two champagne flutes from the passing waiter, giving one to her sister before taking a sip of her own.

  “Next month.” She shrugged. “As long as we make sure there is enough time for alterations.”

  “No problem,” she told her. “I’m so happy for you and Anthony. You guys are made for each other, and I’m so excited my big sister is getting her piece of happiness.”

  “Thank you.” Parker threw her arm around Alexandra’s shoulders, kissing her cheek again. “Now my little sister needs to take her own advice and find someone for herself.”

  “Parker, you know I have—” Alexandra began.

  “Work,” Parker interrupted. “But I’m sick of that excuse. You’ve always been so focused on work it’s been unnatural. You’ve allowed it to consume you. I wish some man had broken your heart. At least then there’d be a chance someone could come along and show you men aren’t dogs and piece it back together, but not you. Dad would be proud of you with whatever career path you chose; there’s no reason to be obsessed with him.”

  “I know that.” And after she discovered the new information she couldn’t fully commit herself to a legacy she couldn’t agree.

  “Do you? You’re so busy trying to fill Dad’s shoes, you’ve forgotten what it’s like to have a life of your own. I loved Dad, too, but he wasn’t the perfect guy you created in your mind.”

  “I have a life,” she objected, ignoring Parker’s comments about her father.

  Parker stepped back, scanning the crowd. “When was the last time you had a date?”

  “That’s none of your business,” Alexandra mumbled. She couldn’t remember, and since Roman and she weren’t technically dating, she couldn’t even use him as an answer.

  “I thought so,” she told her, “which is the reason I agreed to this.”

  Alexandra narrowed her eyes, “Agreed to what?” Parker refused to answer, instead holding her arms out for their grandmother, who was staring at Alexandra with a calculated gleam in her eyes.

  Cagey old goat, she thought, taking in the entourage that seemed to follow her. She hugged her grandfather before greeting Blair and Derrick. Her mother was last, holding on to her longer than normal. They’d spoken a couple times since their disagreement, but Alexandra hadn’t brought it up again.

  All the hellos were issued to people she knew, leaving the handsome man who stood off to the side for last. He was stunning, one of those guys you’d think were sculpted from a Greek statue. She noted the blond hair that hang in shaggy waves, the blue eyes, chiseled cheekbones,
and the lips that looked like they could do some damage, suddenly turned up in a smirk. Clearly someone else knew what was going on here, she thought, returning the expression. This could be fun. Not.

  “Alexandra, darling.” Her grandmother smothered her with affection, palming her face and examining her like a drill sergeant. “You look stunning.” She leaned in to whisper. “Come meet Brandon. He’s one of the new engineers who works at your grandfather’s company.”

  “An engineer, huh?” She grinned, shaking his hand.

  “Not the most attractive of professions,” he admitted, the blush creeping up his cheeks.

  “Well, you know what they say about engineers.”

  He blinked a couple of times, confusion and trepidation setting in his face. “No, I don’t. What do they say?”

  “They know how to get stuff done.” She said it with a straight face, watching the blush set in when he figured out what she was referring to.

  “Right.” He coughed to cover up his embarrassment, taking a long pull of his beer.

  “Is my granddaughter being inappropriate?” her grandmother asked when she figured out Alexandra made him blush. “She takes after her father, and my husband, so I do apologize.”

  “No apology needed.” Brandon smiled at her. “Shall we?” He offered her his arm, and Alexandra hesitated, not wanting him to get the wrong impression. Everyone around them was silent, watching the exchange, and Alexandra wasn’t going to be rude to the guy. He had been a gentleman, so she took the arm he offered and allowed him to lead her away from the group.

  “Thank you for that,” he told her as soon as they were out of earshot. “I was worried you were going to make a stink of coming, and then your grandmother was going to try harder to get us together.”

  “You don’t…” she started, quieting down when he shook his head.

  “Let them think we’re discussing our future children.” He winked. “It saves us both the trouble of having to pretend we want to date. It’s been phenomenal working for your grandfather’s company, and I’d hate to sour our relationship because their granddaughter rejected me.”