Raising the Baton

by Herschensohn, Bruce;

  Raj cleared his throat and said, “His Holiness, I was born in India; I am an Indian, and I have recently been living in America; in New York and other cities and for the most recent two years I have been living back here in India—in the ‘62 War and now in Delhi.”

  “Yes. I was told by Gylao that you are a very important man—that you helped India in the war. Gylao tells me you have become as well-known as Prime Minister Lai Bahadur Shastri!” And he laughed very fully and loudly.

  “No, His Holiness. I am no competition for Prime Ministers.”

  Again the Dalai Lama laughed and this time he nodded as he laughed. “Prime Ministers are a separate breed!”

  “His Holiness,” Raj said, “Chinese are the separate breed. I have come to hate the Chinese. They killed many Hindus in 1962. Many Hindus.”

  “No! No, no. Do not hate Chinese. Never. The Chinese are good people. Never confuse people with governments. Never ignore how good people may be educated badly. Education can be honorable or dishonorable; honest or dishonest.”

  “Since China has taken over Tibet, how are children educated there?”

  “Completely by government’s definition of the word ‘education’. And all religion and religious practices are banned. Now I left the Potala in Lhasa with a great many Tibetans in 1959 so all I saw is what I saw before I left—and now I know more about recent times there from Tibetans who arrived in Dharamshala or Missoori or some other Indian Hill Stations here in India.”

  “Is religion practiced in Tibet now in secret or not at all?”

  “In secret. It is against the law.”

  “Do the children believe the indoctrination of the government of China? Of the People’s Republic of China? Or do the parents guide their children privately?”

  “Their parents often tell them the truth. But the fear among the people is that within generations our religion will be terminated. It is what the government of China is striving for. It may happen.”

  “With 45,000 refugees in India and having freedom of religion here, how can it be exterminated?”

  “I mean in Tibet itself. And besides, if Tibetans become too spread out over India their kinship and ultimately our religion can fade away. We try to keep our communities with no more than one thousand inhabitants in them. It is mandatory if we want to maintain Tibetan schools.”

  “Is the United States acting sufficiently?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “In what ways? Through the U.N.? Financially? Support from private organizations? Through immigration?”

  “I am very grateful to the United States. That support is very much appreciated. You know the United States has been good to Tibetans and to India. Of course we want as much assistance as possible. Of course immigration as well. But we want to stay together and in big groups.”

  “Is enough being done by India?”

  “We are extremely grateful to India. Your two nations—this one, the nation of your birth, India, and the United States of America have done more than any other countries. Look, I am here in India. Go to India’s Hill Stations or in any city close by the Himalayans and talk with all the Tibetans that live there like Dharamshala where I live now. There’s Mussoorie, Chamba, Mandi, Dalhousie, Palampur. Go to Darjeeling. There are more Tibetans in Darjeeling than there are Indians there,” and he laughed at what he had said. “Talk to them.”

  “Is Nepal helpful?”

  “No. Many Tibetans have starved to death in Nepal. Many have gone back to Tibet from Nepal. I hope they can live.”

  “How about Bhutan? Sikkim?”

  “They are better. In Asia India is the best.”

  “And how is the Chiang Kai-shek government on Taiwan?”

  “No. Not through the government. Only through private organizations and people separate from the government there.”

  “What is the Panchen Lama’s present feelings in Tibet?”

  “He believes in living in Tibet and feels it is right to remain there. That is why he stays.”

  “It seems the longer the current political leaders go on in Eastern Europe, Cuba, Tibet, and so on, the harder is the possibility for revolution from within—within those countries. Is that true?”

  “I do not know enough about Eastern Europe and Cuba but I do know that there are many countries in the world and Tibetans are different in that Tibet is a religion as well as a country. We are Tibetans. We want Tibet preserved in all its ways.”

  “Do you think your people will be able to go back within this generation?”

  He laughed. “I am not a prophet. You must know more about this than I do. You are well traveled. You know the world.”

  “Being optimistic, assuming Chiang Kai-shek’s government regains the entire mainland, do you ideally want an autonomous separate state of Tibet?”

  “That is what we had. Tibet is us. It is what we want.”

  “Being pessimistic, if the situation remains unchanged as you and I and our generation become old and gray, I understand that eventually a search must be launched for a new Dalai Lama. Is that correct?”

  “Yes.”

  “Must this be done within Tibet itself or could the search be held here in India—in the Hill Stations you mentioned—in Darjeeling? And will the religion end if the search, wherever it takes place, is repressed?”

  “I would hope it takes place wherever the new Dali Lama may be at that time. I am 29 years old. There should be time one way or the other.”

  They then got into a long discussion on religion, and during much of it the Dalai Lama would speak in his native tongue and it was translated by Rinchin and often respectfully disputed as the Dalai Lama heard the translation. “Now we—you and I will talk about religion and so we can accurately discuss it I will tell you the truth that Tibetans are believing people rather than as the Chinese government wants you to think of them as their political instruments.”

  “Yes, I understand that.”

  “We believe every living thing has a soul-mind and a body. The body comes from seeds from the parents.” He was not content with the description for the translation. “The soul-mind is not from the parents. Sometimes maybe but the soul-mind is usually continuous from previous lives—present life—future lives. There is no limit to the beginning. There can, however, be a permanence at the end of reincarnation. Reincarnation can be in all different forms—an ant, a horse, a human, so many forms. Now, to something else: there are two true forms of Bhudism in Tibet—Mahayan and Vinhayana—or at least there were before 1959. There are two types of reincarnation and one has no control of being reborn in a particular form but is dependent on their Karma. The other type of reincarnation has control over the form of re-birth. Among those who do have control there are stages. Again, two forms. One can be reborn into tens, hundreds, thousands, millions of forms simultaneously; the other with only one physical form. The first through the seventh Dalai Lama were the ones with High Stage—I think.” This; the fourteenth Dalai Lama, kept saying ‘I think.’ “The eighth, I think, onward were the low stage.”

  “Based on what?”

  “Prophets said so. One to seven were higher. So, anyway, there could be thousands, millions of Dalai Lamas. Now the one must be selected with ‘the purpose.’ So in answer to your very important question I did not answer sufficiently, it could be a Chinaman, an Indian, an American. The fourth Dalai Lama was a Mongolian. Next in our belief of this mind-soul is that it is pure and good. Desire, anger, is a false self.” There were translation problems. He included compassion in his discussion and it was difficult to know if this was part of a false self or a real self by his definitions. “Do you feel compassion?” he asked his guest.

  “Yes,” Raj answered.

  “Always?”

  “No.”

  “Do you feel anger?”

  “Yes.”

  “Always?”

  “No.”

  “Then what is not always, is false. Not pure. Because one person is attracted to an object, are al
l people attracted to it?”

  “No.”

  “Does one person look the same to two people who look at that person?”

  “No.”

  “You get a five percent attraction to something. Because of that five percent attraction in no time it becomes a thirty percent attraction. It is all based on ignorance. Good thoughts are not based on ignorance—so destroy bad thoughts and retain the good. Get the correct facts.” He was emphatic on that dialogue. “And bad thoughts will destroy. For everything there is a cause and an effect. Bad Karma is a cause. Bad Karma is bad thoughts. That’s why there is no beginning. Everything is from a succession of cause—effect—cause—effect.”

  “I am a Hindu and to me the hardest thing to understand is to try and comprehend a ‘no beginning.’”

  “I know. I know.”

  “In America I have learned an American phrase that everyone there knows: ‘which came first? The chicken or the egg?’”

  The Dalai Lama laughed uproariously. “We in Tibet have that saying, too.” He looked at the coffee table. “And in this case, which came first, the cause or the effect?” He pulled the table over to exhibit his example. “This, today is a table. Ten years ago it was a piece of lumber. Eleven years ago it was a tall tree. A hundred years ago it was a seed. A thousand years ago it was atoms. And before that it was a single atom—until we go back to the formation of the world. For each there was a cause and an effect. There must have been a cause for the formation of the world. It goes on endlessly. The western religions believe in a single Creator as is often said, all good and all powerful. Did He then know suffering would exist? If He did, then is that evidence that He was not all compassionate? If He did not know suffering would exist, then was He not all powerful? Does it mean that He does not have control of the world? It is good to ask and good to answer. And if there is a God, how did God begin? How did He come into existence? From another God? Was there a series of Gods?” Raj did not know he was being given a psychological X-Ray.

  While shifting in his chair, Raj asked, “Do you not believe in Gods or a God?”

  “Oh, even as a Hindu you have now interpreted everything with Western fault. I am trying to make you think—not about me—about you.”

  Like most visitors with the Dalai Lama, the host strained the mind of his guest and forced his guest to think. Raj Bhavnani, as most visitors before and after him, did not leave as an unbeliever but as a more ardent believer. As provocative as the Dali Lama’s statements came across to the visitor, it was not so much what he said that created the importance of what he was. There was something about him as a presence. It was different.

  The two shook hands. The Dalai Lama smiled and Raj Bhavnani smiled and the Dalai Lama held Raj’s arm and then the Dalai Lama laughed. Loudly and completely. Not because anything was funny but because so many things were good.

  sharps and flats

  THEME TWENTY-TWO

  THE DECISION

  THROUGHOUT MOST OF 1964 Anna went back and forth from San Diego to Los Angeles for her acting roles in the three movies of her Three Picture Deal.

  It was October of 1964 when Anna phoned Chris at work and asked him to meet her on Sunset Cliffs that they knew so well. Abnormal. Not her usual habit when she wanted to meet him somewhere when he would have been leaving work now or later and, either way, where he would more regularly see her immediately at the Silver Spray without any phone call in advance.

  The Sunset Cliffs were as beautiful as usual except the meeting of the late afternoon brought some dark clouds on the far horizon coming over the ocean and maybe that was an indication of something to come that was heavy.

  Anna grabbed his hand and said, “Chris—I have something to tell you.”

  He immediately thought—with immense fear—that she was about to tell him either she was sick or maybe that she has been with Raj and she is in love with him—of all things—from all the men in the world. There was a surge in Chris’ stomach. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes, I’m fine.”

  “Is this ‘serious time’?”

  Her hand left his hand slowly and a breaker came in and went back into the sea. “I suppose it’s serious time, Chris. Chris, did I ever tell you about Lorna—Lorna Whitley—my best friend on Gemstone—Lorna. Did I ever tell you?”

  He shook his head. “I don’t think so. What’s up?”

  “She was my best friend on Gemstone.”

  “Okay. Understand. Is she okay?”

  “Oh, yes. What I want to tell you is that she used to wear a Christian Cross necklace around her neck hanging beneath her blouse. Very religious. She wore it beneath her blouse because her role on TV was not someone who would be wearing that; her role didn’t call for that—but she was very religious and wanted to wear it so she did when she wasn’t in front of the camera pretending to be someone else.”

  “Sure. That makes sense. What’s up? Why is that important right now?”

  Anna reached under her blouse. “Look!” There was a necklace with a Christian Cross.

  “She gave it to you?”

  “No. It’s not hers. It’s a gift she sent me for this Christmas. It’s mine. She’s been visiting convents and now she’s in the Vatican City—the Holy See. She wants to be a—a Nun—a Sister.”

  “Really? Wow! From ‘Gemtsone’ to a Nunnery? Okay!” He had no idea what all this had to do with anything of importance between the two of them. “That’s quite something.”

  “A lot of actresses have done that. It’s not that unusual. There’s Dolores Hart and I’m sure you heard about her. What’s unusual is that Lorna wanted to visit the Vatican and so she’s in Rome now. And I’m going to visit her.”

  He stared at Anna. For a while he said nothing and then he murmured, “You—you’re going to Rome?”

  “Yes.”

  “Why?”

  “I don’t know why. But I think I may want to be a Sister.”

  At this point he didn’t know if his stomach was ever going to feel like his stomach had generally felt in normal life. At least her subject of the day had nothing to do with her being sick or even with his unstopping suspicion of Anna and Raj having something going on. Raj, after all, was a subject of some competition. But God? Jesus Christ? The Pope?

  He cleared his throat. “You aren’t even a Catholic are you?”

  “What do you mean? Yes, I am! On one of the most recent times I was in New York I spent almost one full day in Saint Patrick’s Cathedral!”

  “Did you do that?”

  “Yes!”

  “Was that on the trip when we met?”

  “No. A visit before that trip.”

  “You spent the day at Saint Patrick’s Cathedral?”

  “Almost a day. Yes.”

  “Did you enjoy it?’

  “Yes!”

  “I mean to the point that you want to live there?”

  “At Saint Patrick’s? You can’t live there! That is not the objective of what I am doing!”

  “So what will you do in Rome?”

  “Learn. Lorna is there.”

  “So was Mussolini.”

  “Please. None of that World War II thing.”

  “Sorry. But what about your career? What about acting as your career? Being in the movies!”

  “I’m not in Roustabout.”

  “What do you mean you’re not in it?”

  “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want you to know—but I was cut out. That’s all. It happens. I was cut out. I played in it and they cut it out. I saw the Answer Print—that’s like the first print before all the release prints are made—and my scene wasn’t in it. I was watching it in a screening room at the studio and it was in the scene before I was supposed to be on and there was a dissolve and the scene with me wasn’t there. It was the time in the script that the scene with me was supposed to be in—and it was out. I wasn’t hurt or sad, I was glad. It was a crummy part and I probably looked like a tramp so they were right in putting me on t
he cutting room floor. It’s a relief.”

  “Well, you’re obviously not too pleased. I’m sorry, honey—but you said that those things happen often to a lot of roles—cuts.”

  “And I talked to Morton, the film editor of The Girls on the Beach. He said I’m not cut out—I’m in it at least so far, but he said that there is no director’s cut yet—that’s going to be up to the director, Bill Witney. So I checked on Harlow and all I know about Harlow is that it’s still being cut and that Peter Lawford said he saw the first cut and that I was terrific. But who knows? Someone else told me I look like Carroll Baker and Carroll Baker plays Jean Harlow. So why should they want a look-alike of Carroll Baker?”

  “Am I to assume that you’re so scared of the fate of those two films—because of the cut of Roustabout—you’re now worried about the two films that you haven’t even seen yet—and you’re so concerned that you’ve decided to be a Nun?”

  For the first time of the meeting this late afternoon she smiled; even gave a little laugh. “Yes,” she said with her smile continuing, “You can say that! Maybe anyway!”

  “You’re going to Rome for sure?”

  “Yes.”

  “When are you leaving?”

  “Friday.”

  “What Friday?”

  “The coming one. This week’s Friday.”

  “Oh, Anna!”

  THEME TWENTY-THREE

  “THE RIDE TO LINDBERGH FIELD”

  THE BORROWED POST-WAR CHRYSLER was not at all pleased at the prescribed destination of which it was heading as driven by Chris at dusk. Like dogs can tell where they’re going because of the scents of the journey, cars can tell where they’re going because of the frequency and depth of the pot-holes in the streets. That Chrysler felt it was a member of the family and for some unknown reason it was now was being mistakenly steered by the heads of the family, Chris and Anna, north-east to U.S. Highway 101 toward the airport. The car was trying to figure out what was going on and if someone was going to take a plane and if so, why?