Chase This Light

by Francis Gideon

  “If you’re ready, I think we should go to the bedroom. That way, I can help you undress me, then I can undress you.”

  “Good. Yes. Good plan.” Desire rushed through Pete’s body. “I think I’m in desperate need of some help.”

  Jason pressed another solid, hard kiss on his lips. When they stood from the couch, they walked upstairs hand in hand. Jason checked on Micah only once before pushing open his bedroom door and giving Pete his undivided attention.

  Jason’s bedroom was large and only sparsely furnished. Compared to all the other rooms of the house, this one seemed utilitarian. His bed was positioned in the middle with an end table on either side, a large walk-in closet to the left, and an en suite bathroom to the right. A dozen or so photos lined the wall, including a corkboard. Several images contained a woman with dark brown hair and stark blue eyes and an older version of the same woman. Alison and Adelaide. A couple photo booth images of Jason and Alison cramped together in a small space, making faces and kissing one another’s cheek was front and center, along with Micah’s baby pictures.

  “You should definitely get more stars,” Pete confirmed. “I think that’s needed.”

  Jason came up behind Pete and kissed his neck. “Good, I’m glad you think so.”

  Pete turned away from the pictures and met Jason’s mouth again. Their kiss was slow, tongues exploring as if they had all night. Pete supposed they did. Now that it was almost December, the nights were already sixteen hours long. He forgot all sense of time in the winter. Even Jason’s desk clock blinked 12:00 as if it had recently been unplugged. The sun was far off on the horizon, but it would come again. Until that moment of brightness, they had one another.

  Clothing was gone in a matter of moments. Warmth spread between their skin, making both of them shiver with anticipation. When they stood in front of one another like this, Pete had to get up on his toes to kiss Jason’s neck, ear, and along his jaw. He strained for only a few minutes before he dropped to his knees in front of him, opting for an easier—and much more enjoyable—activity. Pete ran his hands down Jason’s thighs, feeling the strong cords of muscle. Jason groaned as Pete massaged him. When Pete took him into his mouth, Jason shuddered with delight.

  “Fuck, fuck,” Jason said, caught between a moan and a whisper. The room was far enough away that Pete was sure Jason wasn’t worried about sound spilling over. Jason was whispering, almost like they were a secret together. Like the darkness was cloaking them from so much more.

  Pete licked down Jason’s shaft and buried his nose and tongue between his balls. When he slid a finger farther, Jason spread his legs and opened to him.

  “On the bed,” Jason begged. “Please. On the bed.”

  “Say my name,” Pete said. He rose to his feet again and locked eyes with Jason. “Say my name.”

  “Pete, Pete, Pete.” Jason spoke reverently, as if Pete was a psalm. Pete shuddered at the thought.

  “Get on the bed. Can I fuck you?”

  “Yes, yes, yes,” Jason said, repeating the same rhythm as before. “Pete, Pete, Pete.”

  There was some scrambling in the dark as Jason directed Pete to where he kept condoms and lube. Jason peeled back his covers and shifted a pillow under his stomach. He lay facedown, his legs spread as Pete moved between them. He kissed Jason from his neck to down his spine, then hovered along the ditches in his lower back. Jason groaned and fisted the sheets.

  Pete spread Jason’s cheeks with one hand and slid in two lubed fingers. He kissed his back as he explored Jason’s body, trying to find his spot. Once he did, he worked on milking Jason’s moans in time with his own heartbeat. Jason slid his hands between his thighs and stroked himself to Pete’s fingers. The sight of Jason’s twisting shoulder blades and moans of pleasure was enough to make Pete’s cock twitch. He removed his fingers with another kiss and slid a condom over himself.

  “I fucking love this,” Pete gasped as he hovered outside Jason’s body. He kissed his up his spine, over his neck, and met Jason’s mouth as he turned his head to meet him. Pete slid inside as Jason still kissed him. Warm heat engulfed Pete. Jason moaned, his smile tight in pain, before he relaxed.

  “This okay?” Pete asked.

  “Yeah, yeah.” Jason swallowed hard, caught his breath, and then murmured, “Pete, Pete, Pete.”

  Pete twitched inside of him. He started to rock his hips with controlled movements, but soon lost all discipline. Their bodies blended together, made into something better. In no time, it was arcing toward the end.

  Pete came with a gasping moan. He tried to keep pumping, though erratic, as Jason’s orgasm followed and spilled onto the sheets. Both did nothing but pant for a long time.

  “Pete, Pete, Pete,” Jason said.

  “Jason, Jason, Jason,” Pete followed.

  Jason turned to see him over his shoulder. Their lips met again and again. After a long embrace, Pete got up to clean himself off. When he slid back under the sheets, Jason was still naked and kissed him again.

  The night was far, far from over.

  IN THE morning, over coffee with Jason, Pete watched as the sun peeked up from the trees. This was what he loved about this place, this territory, and this country. It was beautiful and simple. For a moment, he thought he saw a glimpse of the white bird in the trees. It turned out to only be snow hidden amongst the evergreen needles.

  One day, he thought. One day I’ll see it again. For now, though, there was more than enough confirmation from Jason and Micah that Pete was on the right path.

  Epilogue

  Spring

  JASON HAD been digging all morning. I knew I shouldn’t have worn my favorite jeans. At least the dark blue ones with the Guess logo faded in the corner of the back pocket were his oldest pair, so it wasn’t too much of a loss that they were now covered in mud and ripped at the ankle. Even better, their destruction meant he could go shopping and buy another pair. A smile spread out on his face, and he worked twice as hard at digging the next hole for the sapling tree.

  “Ready to go?” Pete asked. He held up the sapling by its biodegradable bag. He grinned down at Jason as if he was well aware of how crummy it was to dig, which had been why, not three minutes from the museum, he called “tree handler” as his role for the day.

  “You enjoy me suffering, don’t you?” Jason said, teasing.

  “Nah, I just like you on your knees.”

  “Pete!” Jason’s cheeks flamed. Pete only laughed as he pushed by Jason and dropped the tree into the ground. He patted down the earth all around it and nudged Jason’s side.

  “Oh, come on. It’s not like anyone heard me say that. Everyone is playing in the park.”

  Jason glanced behind them to the museum’s park. Micah wore a bright blue T-shirt and was pushing himself higher and higher on the swing set. Kirsten was watching everyone as the rest of the men on the museum team, plus Nadine, participated in the tree planting ceremony. They had decided to go with evergreens since that would last the longest and the museum wouldn’t have to deal with leaves every fall. So far, they had completed their first line of trees around the perimeter, but there was still at least another dozen more to plant.

  “Why are there so many?” Jason complained, rubbing his knees as he stood up. “I thought we were doing half the border.”

  “We are. But we still need a lot because not every tree survives. The more we plant, the better the odds. And this isn’t too bad. Not nearly as many as what we’ll plant three weeks from now.”

  “Three weeks from now…?” Jason groaned as he remembered. Of course. The first tree planting ticket he’d purchased when he and Pete started dating. The months since their fight and reconciliation in late November had flown by, so much so that Pete was planning on moving in when his lease was up at the end of June.

  “Are you telling me that we’re going to plant more trees right after you move in?”

  “Yes, that’s exactly it,” Pete said, laughing. “So we better work out all our muscles
now so we’ll be nice and strong. I don’t have a lot of cash to hire an intense moving crew like you did.”

  Jason groaned, but it was in jest. Pete nudged his shoulder, spreading more dirt over his shirt. Jason grabbed Pete and planted a kiss directly on his lips. The other workers, including Nadine, were on the other side of the lot and digging more holes, completely out of sight. For a while, it was like no one saw them make out at the back of the van where the saplings to plant were located.

  “Daddy! Pete!”

  Micah’s voice stirred them from their embrace. Jason grinned and opened his arms as Micah ran into them. He lifted him up and over his waist, though his knees smarted and his muscles ached.

  “Daddy, Daddy, push me on the swings.”

  “I don’t know if I can, big guy. I’ve gotta plant some more trees or else Pete will be upset with me.”

  “Hey,” Pete said. “I’m not upset with your dad.”

  “I know. But can I help plant? Then we’ll all go down on the slide.”

  Jason shot Pete a look. “Sound fair to you?”

  “Definitely.”

  For the last remaining trees, Jason and Micah dug the holes while Pete brought them over. Micah patted the dirt around the last tree and then promptly wiped his hands through his hair. Jason made a face at Micah’s utterly filthy curls, but soon shrugged it off. They were all filthy. Baths for everyone—including himself and Pete—were definitely happening the moment they got home.

  “Now we go to the slide?” Micah asked.

  “Yes, definitely. Go over and wait in line, and Pete and I will be right there.”

  Micah ran across the field. The light from the afternoon, getting stronger with each passing day, seemed to follow him the entire time. Jason’s heart hurt for a while as he watched his son, already growing so much faster than he thought possible.

  “You thinking what I’m thinking?” Jason asked, turning to Pete.

  “That we need a shower desperately. Together. When we get home?”

  “You know, that’s not far off from what I was thinking about five minutes ago.”

  Pete smiled and pecked Jason’s cheek. “What, then?”

  Jason waved it off. “Never mind. Kind of corny.”

  “You do that well.”

  Jason laughed. “Fine. I was thinking that one day that kid is going to be able to outrun me.”

  “And is that bad?”

  “No, just different. It’s nice watching something like that grow up and to think I had a part in it.”

  “You did have a part in it. A huge part. That’s how I feel about the Yukon too, and especially these trees,” Pete added, gesturing to the back of the van. “Even when I’m an old man and working at this damn museum, I can look out and see what I’ve done.”

  “You can do that with us too, hopefully,” Jason said. His heart was as fragile as it had ever been in that moment. So Pete’s subsequent smile, and tight hug, really did mean the world.

  “Thank you,” Pete murmured. “I want to kiss you again but you’re so, so dirty right now.”

  Jason pulled Pete close anyway and whispered all the ways they could remedy this issue at home. Pete trembled in his arms.

  “Oh, I see. Then I guess we better get to the park soon and go down that slide.”

  “Yeah, we should.”

  The two of them dropped off their planting equipment with Nadine, then headed to the park hand in hand. Pete leaned his head against Jason’s shoulder.

  “You know you’re going to have to get in that slide too, right?”

  Jason sighed. “I’ve been dreading it, but I’ll do it because I love you. And Micah.”

  “Yeah, yeah,” Pete said, pushing him toward the park structure. “I love you too.”

  At the start of the tunnel slide, Micah sat first, followed by Jason, and Pete at the back. Jason held his breath as Pete pushed off. Micah yelped in laughter as they descended into darkness and emerged in light on the other side. Jason admired the fact that he’d made it to the other side relatively unscathed until Pete crashed into his back and sent a ripple of laughter through Micah.

  “Again!” Micah said.

  “Ugh, okay,” Jason said. “Just give me a minute.”

  The next time it was easier. With Pete and Micah by his side, Jason was sure anything was possible.

  More from Francis Gideon

  When something is perfect, it sets itself up to be destroyed, and for everything gained, something is lost.

  Since Dryden was young, his mother taught him about balance. While she weaves jewelry to sell at the marketplace, Dryden learns how every unspoiled gem begs to be damaged, just like the universe corrects every misfortune.

  But with age and experience, Dryden begins to see the cracks in his mother’s naïve view of life. If she is wrong about balance, she might be wrong about the supposed beast in the woods. Dryden ventures into the forbidden, where a handsome hunter named Otto saves him from a deranged fox and seduces him. But like so much else, Otto has an unseen side, and if Dryden wants to regain his freedom and break Otto’s spell, he’ll have to answer three riddles in three days.

  With the help of his mother’s stories and the fox who once threatened him, Dryden must beat the monster and restore balance to his world. But it will come at a cost.

  Cop-turned-bounty-hunter Gabe Dominguez is hired to capture firestarter Nat Wyatt. For a dragon-shifter like Gabe, apprehending Nat is easy, but transporting him involves more time, energy, and blood loss than he envisioned. An attack from a band of fairies, an out-of-control forest fire, and a showdown at an auction don’t faze Gabe, but Nat’s innocence might stop him entirely.

  Since discovering his abilities, Nat’s lost a best friend, a boyfriend, and trust in his brother. Only his love of concerts and card games get him through life without a home. Rumors of the Judge, a giant dragon who once destroyed half of Canada avenging those he loved, provide Nat with hope of vindication. When Nat discovers his captor is the Judge, he thinks he’s finally caught a break. Through late-night conversations and a shared love of music, Nat tries to convince Gabe he’s not guilty.

  Can Gabe continue his cutthroat lifestyle, or will he run away with his dragon hoard like he’s always longed to do? Can Nat escape his legacy, or will his be another spark snuffed out by people who don’t understand? The Oracle, the most powerful wizard in Canada, might be the only one who can provide answers.

  Trevor Dunn has never gone to the Calgary Stampede, in spite of living in the city all his life. He would much rather listen to music and draw comics in his basement than hang out with a bunch of cowboys. When his sister drags him to the Stampede’s opening parade anyway, Trevor is drawn to a cowboy sporting a green hat.

  Charlie opens Trevor’s mind to the world of country music and country boys. But then an old flame appears in the middle of the festival and Trevor is torn. He adores Charlie, but Mathieu—a punk singer turned acoustic crooner—was Trevor’s first love, and Trevor lost him by being too afraid to chase the dreams they shared.

  When the Stampede ends, Charlie will go back to Toronto, Mathieu will go back on tour, and Trevor will go back to his basement. Realizing that’s not what he wants, Trevor enters a mechanical bull-riding contest in hopes of winning the heart of his true love—or maybe both of them. This time, fear won’t stop him from going after what he wants.

  FRANCIS GIDEON is a writer of m/m romance, but he also dabbles in mystery, fantasy, historical, and paranormal fiction. He likes to stay up late, drink too much coffee, and read too many comic books. He credits music, especially the artists Patti Smith, Frank Iero, Gerard Way, Florence + the Machine, and The Pixies as his main sources of inspiration, but the lists grows every day. Since age twelve, he’s been trying to figure out what genre is best suited for a strange, quiet kid like him and so far, he’s happy to be where he’s ended up.

  When not writing fiction, Francis teaches college English classes while he studies for his PhD. He has published severa
l nonfiction and critical articles on everything from the Canadian poet and artist P.K. Page, transgender identity in the YouTube community, using fanfiction as a teaching tool, and character deaths in the TV show Hannibal. Those are all under different his “real” name, though. He writes his novels using his middle name, Francis, so that his students don’t google him and ask too many questions.

  In the past, he used to own at least three cats but due to allergies, now can only own a betta fish named Mike. Both Francis and his partner live in Canada, where they often disagree about TV shows and make really bad puns. Most of Francis’s novels are dedicated to his partner because he tolerates Francis’s long hours spent locked away without contact. Also, Francis is a hopeless romantic at heart, in case you hadn’t already figured that out.

  Website: francisgideon.wordpress.com

  E-mail: francisgideon88@gmail.com

  Twitter: @francisgideon88

  By Francis Gideon

  Chase This Light

  Fearful Symmetry

  Never Lose Your Flames

  The Taste of Ink

  Published by DREAMSPINNER PRESS

  www.dreamspinnerpress.com

  Published by

  DREAMSPINNER PRESS

  5032 Capital Circle SW, Suite 2, PMB# 279, Tallahassee, FL 32305-7886 USA

  www.dreamspinnerpress.com

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of author imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.