Blood of a Werewolf

by T. Lynne Tolles

  She could feel the earth under her feet. Every texture and feeling was heightened by a hundred times. The moon was rising and it was huge and bright. It painted everything it touched with a silvery-blue highlight. She heard him shout, Come on, as he started into a full out run. She followed in suit. It was glorious, this feeling of running through the fields in the moonlight. Her fur felt alive. She smelled everything and heard things moving underground as she ran passed them. It was sensory overload.

  Suddenly, a rabbit darted across her path and she changed course to pursue it. It was like she had no choice, she wanted to play with it, chase it. She heard Dean say, Later. Follow me now. She didn’t know how far away he was, but his voice seemed to be right next to her. She instinctively knew which way he had gone and pursued him. He was standing near a large pond looking back at her as she ran up next to him. The water was black and still and the moon reflecting in it wiggled slightly with the breeze. He said, Look.

  She looked down in the water, first at his reflection and then to her own. It was a bit scary to see herself as something else and she jumped back a bit. After a second and with Dean’s insistence, she crept up to the water’s edge again and looked at her reflection. What she saw looking back at her was a tan, furred wolf with blue eyes. She thought it was pretty. The reflection cocked its head quizzically as she thought about it and she looked back at Dean. You’re beautiful even as a wolf. See? he said. She looked back at herself and the moon reflecting in the water.

  Everything was so peaceful. Dean was right; it was like being a part of nature, being one with nature in a way that was impossible as a human. She took a step towards Dean and nuzzled his neck with her nose in appreciation. She said, Thank you for being with me and for showing me this, your world.

  Not just my world. It’s now your world, too. You are part of nature and all that it has to offer you. It’s a simple life, but a wonderful one too.

  He was right. It was wonderful. She saw everything differently now. She playfully lunged at him to make him run and play with her and he happily obliged. They took off running, faster and faster. She had never felt so strong; every muscle responded with ease, and her breathing was even, not labored. It was the best feeling ever. As she chased Dean across the fields of grass in the moonlight, she slightly nipped his tail as she gained on him. He turned on a dime and he lunged at her, both of them rolling in the grass, playfully mouthing each other the way two puppies might play. She was laughing in her mind and making little growl noises in her throat. To a human bystander, it might look as if they were fighting, but as wolves tumbling in the grass, it was pure fun. The mane of fur around his neck was thick and her nipping never even reached his skin.

  The rest of the moonlit night was filled with running, playing, and exploring. She couldn’t remember the last time she felt so good and so free. She didn’t remember returning to the house when the moon was setting in the sky but she would always remember this time with Dean. She wished she could share this with her sister, but she knew she couldn’t. Oh, she could relay the feelings, even have her watch, but Darby could never feel the sensations, smell the odors of the earth, and hear the sounds of animals all around. That was something she would only ever know with Dean.

  When she woke in the morning she was naked on the bed, curled in a ball with Dean wrapped around her. It was a wonderful feeling, protective, comforting, and pure. But as she realized she was human again, she grabbed the sheet on the floor and jumped out of bed. This roused Dean out of a deep sleep. He lifted his head and supported it with his hand. He stared at her for a long time. A connection had been made between them, a bond. She stared at his face with those sleepy, hazel eyes, wishing she could hear his thoughts as she had the night before. She picked up her clothes at the foot of the bed where she had neatly folded them, went to the bathroom, and got dressed.

  He felt her unease and slipped on a pair of jeans and was seated on the couch when she came out of the bathroom. Seeing him there, looking so natural and inviting, she wanted to run to him and smother him in kisses and just hold him, but she wouldn’t – she couldn’t. She couldn’t explain these feelings that were welling up in her. Their bond as wolves was that of kindred spirits, but being human again changed everything. She felt self-conscious, timid, and unsure of herself. She didn’t know what to say, or what to do. She just stood there staring at him.

  To break the silence, he stood and approached her, putting his hands on her shoulders. He said, “Will you come again tonight?” For as stern as his face seemed to be, there seemed to be a pleading in his eyes.

  “Umm, yeah, I guess. I wouldn’t be imposing, would I?”

  Sweeping one arm in a grand, waving gesture, he said, “You see I have so much going on. Busy. Busy. Of course you’re not imposing. I invited you.”

  “Yes, I guess you did,” she smiled shyly. What was wrong with her? She never acted this shy with men before. Had she changed – she didn’t recognize herself. “I would… that is… like to come… if that’s all right?”

  “Again, I invited you, remember?” he said with his ever so slight smile.

  “Okay. Same time?”

  “Sure.”

  “By the way, would it be all right to bring Devon tomorrow night? That is, if it’s all right for me to come all three nights.”

  “You want to bring your boyfriend?” he said, sounding grumpy and defensive.

  “No – he’s not my boyfriend. Devon is my sister’s boyfriend. Blake left two days ago, and I’m pretty sure he’s not coming back.”

  “Oh, sorry,” he said but there was something in his voice that made her think he wasn’t all that sorry. He continued, “Can I ask why?”

  “Yeah, I guess since my sister can’t be here, I’d like Devon to know what to expect when we get home. I know it probably sounds stupid, but I think they want me to feel that they are totally fine with this. They want to share the burden so to speak.”

  “That’s nice, the family thing, I mean. I miss that. The vampire is fine with this? Are you sure he doesn’t want to find your weak points?”

  “Devon is not like that. I think you two would actually get along really well if you could get over this vamp vs. wolf thing. You might even find you have a lot in common.”

  “Really? You think so? Yeah. I mean, I trust you, so if this is what you want, I’ll do my best to be cool about it.”

  “Great.” She stretched up on her tippy-toes and kissed his cheek. Well that was stupid, why didn’t I just kiss him. Why am I acting so demure? What a goof.

  “See you around the same time then?”

  “Okay, bye,” she said, walking out the door.

  Chapter 22

  Rowan went to the hotel room and jumped into the shower. She checked for messages, although she didn’t expect any, except maybe one or two from Devon who was probably bored to death. There weren’t any. Devon was probably trying very hard not to look or act bored for Darby’s sake. If he had brought his laptop, he probably could have gotten a lot of work done while watching her sleep and heal. He really is sweet.

  She got dressed and figured she better make an appearance at the hospital. She was sure they had lots of questions about how things went. She grabbed her keys and her backpack and headed to the hospital.

  Darby was beginning to look like her old self. The color was coming back into her skin and her wounds were healing fast. Devon looked tired, but happy. She told them about the transformation and the feeling of oneness with nature. She described to Darby what she looked like as a wolf and how much fun she had. She tried to describe all the different new sensations there had been and how she and Dean could speak mentally when she was a wolf. She talked non-stop, not realizing how much she had to say. She wanted to share everything with Darby and Devon.

  Darby was interested and excited to hear everything. Devon seemed enthralled by it all. She imagined many of these sensations were also felt by vampires. They really did have a lot more in common than she had ev
er thought. She hadn’t realized how long she went on about her adventure and when she did, she got a little embarrassed.

  “I’m so glad it went well, Rowan. Will you go again tonight?” Darby asked.

  “Yes. I think I should spend as much time learning from a fellow werewolf as I can before going home and facing it alone.”

  “You are not alone, Rowan. We’ll be with you. I wish I could go with you tonight,” Darby said.

  “Oh, you’ll be sick of it soon enough, when I start bringing home prizes like Harry. Maybe we should get a bigger kitty door, say like a doggy door,” Rowan joked, but some of it was serious.

  Darby grimaced, “We’ll do what we have to. If we need to move to accommodate this, we’ll move, maybe somewhere in the woods or the country where you can hunt and play as you like.”

  All by myself. Alone. Utterly alone - like Dean. No family to play with or hunt with, just a lone wolf where no other wolves live. Her thoughts washed over her and a stabbing pain pierced her chest. She didn’t want to think about that anymore.

  “Devon, I was hoping you could come tomorrow night? I’ve okayed it with Dean. I know it might be a little awkward at first, but since I can’t share this with Darby right now, I’d like someone to know what to expect.”

  “Yes, definitely, if that’s what you want?”

  “Yes, I do. Thank you! You don’t mind, Darby, do you?”

  “Are you kidding? I can’t wait for my turn. I’m envious,” she said with a huge smile.

  “Well, I’m going to run. Maybe take a nap. I might not get back here before I leave for Dean’s, so if I don’t, I’ll see you tomorrow.” She kissed her sister and gave Devon a big hug and shot out of there as fast as she could. The sadness was taking over her again and she wanted to lie down.

  Darby and Devon talked a while after Rowan left. Darby asked, “What do you make of the silent pause in Rowan’s conversation?”

  “She’s lonely, Darby. She doesn’t have anyone like her. I know how I would feel if I didn’t have Blake to console with. There’s a lot to be said for being with one’s own kind. I would suspect she’s bonded with Dean and is having a tough time with leaving him and once she does, it will get worse.

  “But that’s silly; she has us,” Darby retorted.

  “It’s not, Darby. In fact, it’s about as natural as it gets. Blake, at the most crucial of times, has abandoned her. The only werewolf she knows of is Dean. You are her sister, and she wants to share this with you, but lets face it - how much can you really share with her? She can describe her feelings, her sensations, and her transformations, but you’ll never experience them with her. I hate to say it, but Blake may have blown it with Rowan. She may never be able to forgive him for this. I’d say if we don’t see Blake before this full moon phase is over, he may never win her back.”

  “But love doesn’t work that way. You can’t fall out of love like you are flipping a switch.”

  “Abandonment leaves terrible scars, Darby, and not only did he abandon her, but he left her because of what she is now. She can’t make the werewolf thing go away. It is who she is. It wasn’t her choosing. It would be like someone leaving you because you had been badly scarred in a car accident and they found you grotesque. That is the ultimate betrayal of love.”

  “Oh my God, Devon, I never thought of it like that, but you are right. She’s going through all this and I can’t do anything to help.”

  Rowan arrived at Dean’s house with a six-pack in one hand, and a sheet in the other. Dean laughed heartily when he saw this. It was the first time she had ever seen him in a full out laugh. It made him look more handsome than ever and she blushed, grateful he couldn’t read her mind yet.

  She handed him a beer and sat at the other end of the couch. She was as nervous as she had been the night before, but not for the same reasons. She thought if they could get to know each other a bit, maybe this shyness would go away.

  She asked him about his family and what he did when he wasn’t a werewolf running in the moonlight. What would he like to do with his life?

  He said he was a carpenter by trade, but had done a hodge-podge of different things. His family was all gone now and he didn’t have any grandiose plans for the future. He liked things simple and money seemed to make things messy.

  “But don’t you get lonely?”

  “Sure, but it’s not like you can find another werewolf on an Internet dating service. They don’t put that information in the search criteria – I’ve checked.”

  “True, I suppose. But, why not a human?”

  “It’s a big thing admitting you’re a werewolf to someone. What if they freak out? What if they think you’re loony? Next thing you know, you’re strapped to a gurney in an asylum somewhere or being hunted down by an angry lynch mob of townspeople.”

  “I see your point.”

  “So what about you? Who is Rowan? What does she do when she’s not in Colorado with a werewolf?”

  “I’m a student at UC Santa Cruz. My parents were killed in an accident a few years ago. My closest family is Darby, who you met. Darby and I are descendants of witches. We’ve dabbled a bit in magic, but up until recently we hadn’t really utilized any of that power. Darby and I live together in our parents’ house not too far from San Francisco. That’s pretty much it.”

  “That’s a lot. Witches, huh?! Can you ride a broomstick?”

  “No. Dodged any silver bullets lately?”

  “Touché. That was insensitive of me. I don’t entertain much. I suppose my manners are not what they should be.”

  “It’s all right. I guess I’m probably a little oversensitive given my new life-altering gift.”

  “I suppose being made into a werewolf is very different than being born into it.”

  “Yeah!” She chugged the last of the bottle she had in her hand. She grabbed another and handed one to him and twisted the top off hers.

  “Can I ask you why your vampire boyfriend left?” he said.

  “Sure. He found my being a werewolf disgusting, even when he wasn’t sure I was one yet.”

  “Ouch. How are you doing?”

  “Great,” she lied. “Isn’t it about time to get into my sheet?”

  “Um. Yeah, I guess so.”

  The transformation was easier the second time. She knew what to expect and it wasn’t scary anymore. She enjoyed this time with Dean, sharing everything. They chased rabbits and frogs and ran as fast as they could. Aside from Dean eating his rabbit, the night was perfect. They swam in the black water of the pond, and played chase under the glorious white moon, nipping each other’s tail in a game of ‘tag – you’re it’.

  It was a simple life, as Dean had said, but it was pretty damn wonderful too. She wished this bond they felt when they were wolves was the same when they were human, but they really were just getting to know one another. She was leaving after the next full moon, and that made her heart ache as a wolf and a woman.

  The morning came too fast. She woke to find herself wrapped around him. Her head on his shoulder, his three-day-old beard scratchy on her forehead. His arm was draped over her and resting on her hip. Her hand rested on his broad chest and she had one leg over him and one between his legs. She didn’t jump out of bed this morning. She just lay there peacefully, comforted by his warmth in the safety of his presence. She knew she should get up and cover herself and him, but she wanted to hold on to the night for as long as she could, praying it would never end, when she knew it had to. That’s when Blake’s face popped into her mind and embarrassment showed its face. Instead of jumping out of bed this time, she tried ever so gently to untangle herself from Dean. It was like pulling a plant out of the ground, the roots grumbling and protesting at being pulled from the comfort of their warm soil home, but she too didn’t want to leave. Grateful that she hadn’t woken him, she took the quilt that was wadded up at the foot of the bed and gently covered his handsome body.

  She grabbed her clothes and quietly got dressed in th
e bathroom. When she came out she saw the last two beers of the six-pack still sitting on the coffee table and she picked them up and the empties and put them in the kitchen. She tiptoed back to the bedroom, placed a note on the pillow, and kissed his forehead.

  Back at the hotel, she took a shower and then stopped after dressing and lay back on the bed. She thought of lying there with Dean. How pure and simple life was with him and how chaotic and crazy it had been with Blake, not that it was his fault, or Devon’s, for that matter. Every time she thought of Blake, she would picture his face in disgust from her dream several days ago. How could he do that? She hadn’t changed inside. It all seemed like a scene from a bad ‘B’ movie. The anger had grown in her when she hadn’t even been aware of it.

  As she had before, she pushed the thought out of her head and headed for the hospital. The talk there was minimal. She was brooding and they were trying to give her space to let her brood if she wanted to, but that seemed to make her even madder.

  “So we go home tomorrow?” Rowan asked.

  “Yeah! Devon booked us on a United flight out of Denver at noon. I’ll be checked out of here first thing in the morning. How are you doing?”

  “Good,” she lied.

  “If all goes well tonight with Devon and Dean, maybe you should invite him to stay with us in California for a visit. You could take him surfing, maybe go to Big Sur before you go back to school. It might be fun?”

  “Sure. I’ll mention it. Not sure he’d come though. I’m not sure he’s ever been away from here. So Devon, how about I meet you in front of the hospital at 8:30?”

  “I’ll be there.”

  “Bye D – love you,” Rowan said sadly as she opened the door.

  Darby wasn’t sure Rowan heard her, but she yelled, “I love you too, Rowan.”