by Chris Colfer
DIE MAGIC SCUM
Brystal read the burning message, and her whole body went tense.
“I guess they weren’t here for the wedding,” Seven said.
“No,” she said. “They were here for me.”
CHAPTER FOUR
A BEWITCHING OFFER
The following morning, the Fairy Council was gathered around Brystal’s glass desk, staring down at the glowing arrow as if it were a poisonous animal.
“They came out of nowhere and then disappeared without a trace,” Brystal recalled. “There were hundreds of them. They all wore the same silver robes and masks that covered everything but their eyes. The image of a white wolf was stitched across their chests like a crest of some kind. They used wooden posts to spell out Die Magic Scum and set it on fire. It was the only thing they left behind.”
“Creepy,” Skylene said, and shivered at Brystal’s account.
“Are you sure they didn’t leave anything else?” Emerelda pressed. “There weren’t any footprints or tracks? Any clues about who they are or where they came from?”
“I’m positive,” Brystal said. “I searched the area for hours and found nothing.”
Tangerina was vigorously flipping through the pages of a thick book. It contained illustrations of different armies, navies, and royal guards throughout history, and the official uniforms each division wore.
“Are there any other details you can give me?” Tangerina asked.
“The archer had a crown of sharp metal spikes,” Brystal said. “That’s all I could see.”
Tangerina tossed the book aside. “None of these uniforms match your description,” she said. “Whoever they are, they aren’t from an official fleet in any of the kingdoms.”
Brystal’s eyes filled with fear. “Then maybe they were ghosts,” she said.
The comment sent chills down the fairies’ spines. Emerelda used a handkerchief to pick up the red arrow, and she inspected the glowing arrowhead with an emerald magnifying glass.
“And you said their cannonballs were made from the same material?” she asked.
Brystal nodded. “Their arrows and cannonballs went straight through my shield,” she said. “Not only is the stone immune to magic, it also burns my skin whenever I touch it. Other people were in contact with it, too, but it didn’t seem to hurt them. I suspect it’s only harmful to people with magic in their blood.”
Emerelda cautiously touched the arrowhead with her index finger and quickly pulled it away—it burned her skin, too. The fairies passed the red arrow around, and the glowing stone had the same effect on all of them, confirming Brystal’s suspicion.
“How strange,” Skylene said. “It burns but it doesn’t leave a mark.”
“It must be a new invention,” Emerelda said. “I’ve spent my whole life around rare stones and gems, but I never saw anything like this in the mines.”
“Actually, I think it’s pretty old,” Xanthous said.
Like Tangerina, Xanthous was also searching through a big book. The pages contained sketches of different weapons used throughout history. He opened the book to a section on archery and placed it on the desk beside the red arrow.
“Take a close look at the red arrow,” Xanthous said. “Notice the shape of the arrowhead? See how it’s been cut like a triangle? Now look at the shaft and the fletching. See how they’ve been painted black?”
The fairies studied the red arrow and nodded.
“Now compare the red arrow to the sketch of a modern arrow in the book,” Xanthous went on. “See how modern arrowheads are shaped like diamonds? Notice how the shafts and fletching are colorless? There’s a reason for that. Over time, archers learned that arrows fly better when the tips are narrow, and they travel farther without the weight of paint.”
“So how old is it?” Skylene asked.
Xanthous gulped. “Well, if my theory is right, then it’s not just old—it’s ancient.”
He turned the page and showed them the sketches in the previous section. No one could deny it—the red arrow looked exactly like the arrows used in ancient times. Brystal paced behind her desk as she thought about the revelation.
“If the weapons are ancient, they must have a limited supply,” Brystal said. “That explains why they used them so sparingly. They only used enough cannonballs to get my attention, and even though they had plenty, they only shot one arrow at me. They weren’t there for a full-fledged battle—they were there to hurt me.”
“I’m confused,” Emerelda said. “Why haven’t we heard of these weapons before? And where did those men find them?”
“Maybe they didn’t find them, maybe they were saving them,” Brystal said. “It’s possible this group has been around since ancient times, too. There are a lot of secret societies that have been operating for centuries.”
“Like what?” Skylene asked.
“Skylene, they wouldn’t be secret if we knew about them,” Tangerina said.
“Oh,” Skylene said. “But then why wait until now to attack? Why only target one person? And at a wedding of all places?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Brystal asked. “For the first time in six hundred years, magic is legal and accepted in all four kingdoms—whoever they are, they’ve never had a bigger reason to attack. And nothing starts a war faster than eliminating the leader of your adversary. So they waited for the perfect time to strike.”
It was a very unsettling idea to process. The magical community had plenty of enemies, but none with such powerful resources.
“It’s especially cruel to ruin such a special occasion,” Skylene said. “As far as I’m concerned, hate is no excuse for rudeness.”
“Poor Barrie,” Tangerina said. “Are they going to have another wedding?”
“He and Penny decided to complete the ceremony in private,” Brystal said. “I can’t blame them. Everyone was pretty traumatized after the attack. My father was so shaken up he actually asked me to repair the damage with magic.”
“We should postpone our events until these men are caught,” Emerelda said. “It’s a miracle no one was killed at the wedding, but imagine what might happen if thousands of innocent people were watching.”
“I agree,” Brystal said. “And I don’t want the other fairies hearing about this. The magical community has spent enough time living in fear.”
“Are you two nuts?”
The Fairy Council turned around and saw Lucy had snuck into the office without their noticing. She was stretched out on the glass sofa, eavesdropping on their conversation.
“You’re supposed to be suspended!” Tangerina reprimanded.
“You’re supposed to be suspended,” Lucy mimicked. “That’s how dumb you sound.”
Brystal sighed. “Lucy, I don’t have the energy for this,” she said. “You know you’re not allowed at Fairy Council meetings.”
Lucy hopped to her feet. “This is no time to be divided!” she declared. “There’s a squad of ghostly terrorists using ancient weapons to enact hate crimes! We need all hands on deck!”
“We’ve got plenty of hands, thank you very much,” Skylene said.
“But you’re already making mistakes!” Lucy professed. “The last thing we should do is cancel events and keep quiet about this. We need as much public support as possible! The more awareness we spread, the more likely we’ll find out who these creeps are. We should put up posters asking people to come forward with information. We can offer a reward in exchange for evidence—like a cash prize, a unicorn, or Tangerina!”
“Hey!” Tangerina yelled.
“As soon as word gets out that the beloved Fairy Godmother is in danger, people will be begging to help us!” Lucy continued. “In the meantime, we should hire a professional investigator to help us track down the men. I know a brilliant detective in the Eastern Kingdom—full disclosure, he’s also a children’s party clown, but no one can solve a mystery quicker than Juggles!”
Brystal rolled her eyes. “Thank you, Lucy,” she s
aid unenthusiastically. “The council will take your suggestions into consideration. Now, please, leave the office.”
“Come on, Brystal, you’ve got to listen to me!” Lucy pleaded. “I’ve warned you what might happen if we don’t keep people interested in magic! Getting the public involved in a manhunt is the perfect opportunity to keep them excited about us!”
“Lucy, please—”
“These ghost guys know exactly what they’re doing,” she went on. “They’ve got costumes, ancient weapons, sneak attacks, burning signs—they’re putting on a great show! What happens if destroying magic becomes more entertaining than magic itself? What happens if they make it trendy to hate us again?”
Once again, Lucy was overwhelming Brystal with her unsolicited advice. Brystal waved her wand, and the office doors flew open.
“I’ve already asked you to leave,” she said. “If I have to ask you again, consider yourself banned from the council.”
It took all of Lucy’s physical and mental restraint to bite her tongue. She sulked to the door, stomping her feet loudly as she went. As Lucy left the office, Mrs. Vee entered with her arms full of large scrolls. Lucy didn’t even acknowledge the housekeeper as she passed her in the doorway.
“Well, Lucy seems quiet,” Mrs. Vee said. “I guess there’s a first time for everything. HA-HA!”
“What can I do for you, Mrs. Vee?” Brystal asked.
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything important,” the housekeeper said. “I finally finished the blueprints for the kitchen expansion and I was too excited to keep them to myself. With your permission, I’m planning to knock down the south wall and add a modest ten thousand square feet. Yes, it’s a little extravagant, and yes, it includes a day spa. But as the famous phrase goes, Happy cook, happy outlook! HA-HA!”
Mrs. Vee headed to Brystal’s desk with a happy bounce in her step. Skylene gasped as an exciting idea popped into her head.
“We should show Mrs. Vee the arrow!” she told the others. “She’s pretty ancient, too—maybe she knows the answers we’re looking for?”
“Ancient?” The housekeeper was offended by the comment. “I may have more yesterdays than tomorrows, but I’m still a child in tortoise years! HA-HA!”
Skylene carefully raised the red arrow off the desk. “Mrs. Vee, have you seen something like this before?” she asked. “Brystal was attacked last night by men in silver robes! They had weapons made from this weird stone that defies magic!”
“Well, I’m no stranger to strange men, but that doesn’t mean I know every Tom, Bob, and Joe in—”
As soon as Mrs. Vee laid eyes on the red arrow, she went silent and all the color drained from her face. The housekeeper dropped her blueprints, and her whole body started trembling. She fearfully backed into a wall and slid to the floor.
“No!” Mrs. Vee shrieked. “It can’t be!”
Her reaction stunned the Fairy Council. They had never seen Mrs. Vee even frown before, but the arrow had sent the housekeeper into a nervous breakdown.
“Mrs. Vee, have you seen one of these arrows before?” Brystal asked.
“N-n-never in person,” she stuttered. “B-b-but I know what it is.”
“What about the men who attacked Brystal?” Emerelda asked. “Do you know who they are?”
Mrs. Vee nodded, and tears spilled down her face, like the question was painful to answer.
“The Three Thirty-Three!” she gasped.
“The Three Thirty-Three?” the fairies asked in unison.
“THE THREE THIRTY-THREE!”
Mrs. Vee became hysterical and wailed like she was being attacked herself. She jumped to her feet and ran out of the office without saying another word. The fairies could hear her screaming as she ran down the floating steps and headed to her chambers on the first floor.
“What the heck just happened?” Tangerina asked.
“Mrs. Vee just confirmed we have the right to be worried,” Emerelda said.
“But what does the Three Thirty-Three mean?” Xanthous asked. “Is that just their name or are there specifically three hundred and thirty-three of them?”
“Either way, we need to find out,” Brystal said. “I’ll check on Mrs. Vee and see if I can get any more information from her. Emerelda will cancel all our upcoming appointments until further notice, and none of us will mention a word of this to anyone.”
The Fairy Council nodded at her instructions. Brystal headed to the door, but before she could get out of the office, Lucy suddenly returned and blocked the doorway. Her round face was bright red and she was out of breath.
“Lucy, I told you to—”
“Sorry, I know I’m not supposed to be here!” Lucy panted. “But something is happening that you should know about!”
“Don’t worry, we already know,” Brystal said. “I’m on my way to check on her.”
“Huh?” Lucy asked. “Oh, I’m not talking about Mrs. Vee—although, it’s always unsettling to see an old woman running down a steep flight of stairs—I’m talking about the border! Something is trying to break into the Fairy Territory!”
The Fairy Council quickly dashed across the office and looked out the window. The grounds were filled with students practicing their magic, but they had all stopped to watch something moving in the distance. At the edge of the property, a section of the hedge barrier was shaking and swaying like a monstrous creature was trying to push through it.
“You think it’s the Flirty Dirty-Three? Or whatever they’re called?” Skylene asked.
“That’s impossible!” Emerelda said. “No one can get through the barrier unless they have magic in their blood!”
“But their weapons broke through Brystal’s shield!” Xanthous said. “They might have a way to break through the barrier, too!”
It was a horrifying possibility and Brystal wasn’t going to take any chances. She ran outside as fast as she could and her friends followed her. The Fairy Council hurried to the border and formed a line of defense between the hedge barrier and the students.
“Everyone inside the academy!” Brystal commanded. “Now!”
The students could sense the panic in her voice and quickly headed for the castle. Shortly after the Fairy Council arrived, Horence galloped across the property on his three-headed horse and joined the fairies. The knight leaped to the ground with his sword raised, ready to protect the academy at all costs, but Brystal worried it still wouldn’t be enough to stop the 333.
The hedge shook and swayed harder and harder, and the branches snapped and crunched louder and louder. Suddenly, all the leaves in the area turned yellow and wilted to the ground. The hedge rotted away, forming a wide opening, and the trespasser appeared. It was a large carriage that was shaped like a human skull. The whole vehicle was painted black and its windows were designed like cobwebs. There were no drivers, horses, or wheels, and instead, the carriage crawled on eight wooden legs like a massive spider. It crept out of the hedge and stopped a few feet in front of the Fairy Council. The legs bent slowly as the carriage planted its belly to the ground. The door swung open with gusto and a passenger stepped outside.
The passenger was an attractive woman in a tight black gown that coiled around her body like a snake. Her skin was as pale as bone, her lips were as red as fresh blood, and she wore ashy makeup around her wide, dark eyes. The ends of her long black hair burned like thousands of dying matches, shrouding the woman in a smoky fog.
“Well, well, well,” she said. “Look at all the color.”
The woman spoke with an airy voice, and she gazed around the academy with a mischievous grin. Although Brystal was relieved the trespasser wasn’t from the 333, there was still something menacing about the woman that Brystal didn’t trust.
“Who are you?” she asked.
The woman’s smile grew when her eyes landed on Brystal. As she walked toward Brystal, the grass turned brown and shriveled under the woman’s feet. Brystal raised her wand at the mysterious visitor, but the woman wasn�
��t intimidated in the slightest.
“There’s no need to point that thing at me, dear,” she said. “We’re on the same side.”
“I’ll be the judge of that,” Brystal said. “Now, who are you?”
“My name is Mistress Mara,” the woman said with a shallow bow. “And you must be the famous Fairy Godmother. I’d recognize your sparkling wardrobe and confident disposition from miles away. We are absolutely thrilled to make your acquaintance.”
“We?” Brystal asked.
“Girls, come out and meet the Fairy Godmother!” the woman called to the carriage. “And remember to use your manners!”
At her request, four adolescent girls emerged from the carriage. They were all around the age of thirteen, and they wore identical black cloaks with pointed hoods, and striped stockings that matched the colors of their hair.
“Allow me to introduce Sprout, Hareiet, Beebee, and Stitches,” Mistress Mara said. “Girls, this is the legendary Fairy Godmother, but she needs no introduction.”
Sprout was the tallest of the group, and she had bushy green hair that barely fit under her hood. Hareiet was bucktoothed and had a twitchy nose and two purple braids, and one of her eyebrows was permanently raised in suspicion. Beebee was the smallest and roundest of the girls. She had short blue curls and very thick glasses, and she seemed to be buzzing with excitement. Stitches had wiry orange hair, an unusually wide mouth, and a blue eye that was slightly bigger than her red eye.
The girls bowed to Brystal, and she noticed that all the women—including Mistress Mara—wore a golden necklace with a white moonstone. Once they were introduced, the girls eyed the property with creepy smirks that made the Fairy Council uneasy.
“Are they your daughters?” Brystal asked.
“Oh, heavens no,” Mistress Mara said with a laugh. “I’m merely a mentor to these four. Personally, I never understood the appeal of motherhood. Why create life when you could enjoy your own?”
The woman threw her head back and laughed at the remark. Brystal lowered her wand and the students at the castle figured it was safe to return. Slowly but surely, all the fairies throughout the territory gathered behind the Fairy Council and studied the curious visitors.