A Soulmark Series

by Rebecca Main

  My hand slips to my waist and removes the butterfly knife. From habit alone, I let it flip open and around my fingers with expert ease. It feels oddly warm in my hand, no doubt from the Borealis Matter it now hosts inside of it. When I finish my tricks, I hold the handles tightly within my grasp and press the flat side of the blade against my forearm. I wish desperately for my dragon skin armor, but there is nothing I can do about that. The wolves have not been able to find it, for whatever reason.

  “Please find me, Nova,” I whisper, stealing myself for the quick pain of the blade. My hand jerks back, but the blade doesn’t touch my skin. I jump at the cold touch on my forearm, but can't rip my arm from the vampyré’s hold.

  Chapter 16

  Revelations

  “What are you doing out here?” She all but snarls at me, eyes flitting across the forest.

  “What am I…?” My brow scrunches in confusion. “I came out here for you. To save you.”

  Nova scoffs and releases me, taking a few large steps back. She eyes the forest line nervously, shaking her head. “There’s nothing you can do to save me,” she spits, but sorrow lines her words.

  I take a moment to look at her. Nova crosses her arms at my inspection, but it doesn't stop me from my cataloging. She's soaked through. Her long hair hanging in thick wet strands that cling to her neck and shoulders. She still wears her standard issue Warden-wear. Its stains dampened and hidden due to the inclement weather. She looks... worn, but there is no difference in her appearance otherwise—except for the cooler tone of her tawny skin and the hunger in her eye. “You have to go. Get out of here.”

  “Nova….” I lick my lips nervously and shift forward. “I have the Vogart.”

  Nova stills, eyes widening and filling with hope. Her bottom lip trembles. “You do?” I nod my head fervently, and Nova stands before me an instant later. “Where? Is it on you? Do you have it now?” Her hands fly over my body in a panicked search, and there is nothing I can do to stop her. Even if I wanted to “Where is it?” she asks, her eyes bleeding red with sudden hunger.

  “It’s not on me,” I confess, holding my breath as I wait for her next move, aware of my vulnerability.

  “I….” Her voice shivers with emotion as her eyes flicker back to brown. “I’m sorry,” she whispers hoarsely.

  “It’s all right. It’s all right,” I soothe, reaching out tentatively to touch her arm. I’m surprised she doesn’t flinch back. Instead, Nova stands perfectly still, like a marble statue, as she gazes at me in despair. “They have it, but I can get it. I can use it on you.”

  Her perfect veneer splinters as her eyes go glossy. “I don’t think I can last that long,” she grieves, eyes closing shut as if in pain. “He keeps making me come out here. Night after night. Trying to draw out the wolves or the witches or you. That’s why you can’t be here. I’ll have to tell him—tell him everything—and if I don’t….” Nova wheezes, eyes a brilliant scarlet once more as they open to stare at me. “He’ll punish me. He already punishes me. He won’t let me feed, Callie. He’s starving me. He’s ordered me not to feed, and I can’t fight it. I can’t fight the sire bond.” Nova’s hands knot themselves into her hair as she lets out a pained moan and begins to pace.

  “It will be all right,” I try to say, but she only moans louder. I take a few steps back and tighten my grip on the blade.

  “No, it won’t! It can’t be! Look at me.” She turns her tearstained face toward me. “I’m a monster. Just put me out of my misery, Callie. I can’t stand this hunger. I can’t stand the thought of hurting someone. Please,” she begs, dropping to her knees. "Please kill me."

  I stare at Nova in horror. I can’t possibly…. There is no way I can bring myself to do that. Not to her. Not when her sisters are counting on me. Not when I so desperately want to right this wrong.

  “You’re not a monster,” I tell her harshly, surprised by the candor in my voice. “You’ve kept yourself in control this whole time around me, and we both know you didn’t have to. You could have taken me out easily.”

  Nova stares at me, bottom lip still trembling but unmoving otherwise. “I’m so hungry,” she cries softly, shoulders sinking. “And I can smell them, you know? The wolves surrounding us. And they smell good, Callie, so much better than just your average human. It doesn’t matter that it’s raining. I can smell them even from here. Even like this. My senses are in hyperdrive. I bet they have guns, don’t they?" A hoarse laugh issues from her lips. "To take me out? Just let them, Callie. Let them do it. And tell my sisters—”

  “No!” I interrupt viciously. “Don’t say another word.” Emotions clog my throat, the rain feeling suddenly colder as it seeps its way to my bones. I press my fingertips against the earpiece. “Keenan, do you copy? Over.”

  “Roger that. What do you need? Over.”

  “Swear to me you won’t let anyone harm her.” The line stays static for too long. Long enough that Nova and I both turn uneasy eyes toward the forest line around us. My heart clenches painfully at the look of raw hope on Nova's face. One I'm sure is mirrored on my own.

  “Roger that. Callie, don’t do anything—”

  “Over and out.” I snap into the receiver before pulling it off and pocketing it. I reholster the blade next, hands shaking with nervous energy.

  Nova stares at me wide eyed. “What are you doing?”

  What am I doing?

  I swallow. “Tell me honestly. How much of you is left? How much control do you have?”

  “I… I’m still me, Callie. But this hunger is unrivaled. It's unignorable. I'm a predator now, more than I've ever been in my life. The hunger is just a part of my nature now. I can’t help it,” she tells me, “but I think I can control it. I have so far. I just don’t know how much longer I can if I don’t feed. He won't even let me eat a fucking rabbit.”

  “Then feed on me.”

  Nova stares at me aghast, shaking her head from side to side. “I won’t.”

  “You said it yourself; you won’t be in control much longer if you don’t feed,” I argue, stepping closer to her kneeling form.

  “He told me I couldn’t.”

  “Couldn’t what?”

  “He said….” She frowns as she tries to recall his exact words, trying to hide the desperate hunger form her expression. “He said 'I may not feed unless I give him what he wants.'”

  “And what does he want?”

  “The ring. One of the wolves or witches. You.” Her breath hitches on the last word, a different kind of longing and loss drawing into her gaze. I drop down to my knees in front of her.

  “I thought you said he wanted you to draw us out.”

  “He does,” she says, sniffling and wiping the rain and tears from her face.

  “Well, you did it. We’re beyond the border. So feed. Feed on me. I trust you. You won’t kill me.” I slip my hand into hers, amazed when she squeezes my hand back painfully tight.

  “Callie… I don’t think I would ever forgive myself if I hurt you.”

  “You won’t,” I assure her, griping her back with equal ferocity.

  Her eyes flit across my face, searching for reassurance. When she finds it, she takes a deep breath, licking her lips. Nova leans forward, hand rising to my face to caress my jawline and tentatively run her fingertips over my lips. My breath hitches, as does hers.

  “When you told me he was your soulmark, I was crushed. Could you tell? Did you know?” She lets out a weak laugh, fingers still tracing my cupid’s bow. “And I’ll admit, I thought that if we had to take out any wolves during our recon, I would go for him. That way, even if you were forced to be with Wyatt one day, maybe you could find comfort in me. I knew if you found your way to him that there would be no hope for us.” Her eyes drop to my neck. “I don’t suppose there’s any chance you haven’t sealed the mark, is there?”

  My mouth feels suddenly dry, even with the smattering of raindrops slipping past my parted lips. “Nova….” The tone of my voice gives me aw
ay, but she only shakes her head softly. A small, wistful smile gathering on her lips.

  “It’s all right. It was a fool’s hope.” Her eyes alight back to mine, the scarlet that stares back at me leaving me speechless. “Just one kiss, before….” Her lips press swiftly against mine, the action freezing me almost completely.

  Her lips are unnaturally cool against my own. But they are soft. Softer than I would have ever imagined as they move tenderly against my own. The kiss is brief, yet I find myself short of breath when she pulls away.

  “You know,” she murmurs, “I don’t need to breathe anymore, but somehow you still manage to take my breath away. Funny how you can still do that even now without trying.”

  “Nova,” I whisper back, not knowing what to say.

  “Shh. No more talking. I’ll only take as much as I need. I promise.” Then without another second's hesitation, she dives toward my neck. I catch the barest glimpse of her fangs and then—

  “Ahh.” The startled cry shoots out of my mouth before I can help it. The pain, though not the worst I have felt, is unequivocally the strangest I've felt before. Especially knowing my blood is being drunk straight from my body. The hot wash of it spills over my shoulders past the seal of her mouth, and Nova gives a hearty moan, biting harder. “Careful,” I mutter as I grit my teeth against the pull of her mouth.

  She makes no reply, only holds me more securely as she lessens the drag of her gulps. I feel a fever break on my forehead, a strange heat unfurling inside me as she continues to feed.

  “Oh.” My eyes flutter closed as a wave of desire rides through me unexpectedly. What is this? How can I possibly be feeling this way? A gasp tears from my mouth as a particularly deep pull is initiated by Nova, accompanied by a guttural moan from the woman. It’s as if it pulls straight at my core. “Stop,” I rasp.

  It takes her a moment, but she does. She licks at the wound, sending a caustic shiver up my spine as I feel the puncture marks close. Nova's breathing sounds heavy in my ear, a heavy metallic tinge to her breath. Her head turns ever so slightly and accidentally brushes her bloodstained cheek against my own.

  “Thank you,” she says, still breathing heavily. I give a dim nod, closing my eyes to the pain that radiates from my neck and the lingering pleasure in my loins. “Callie, I—” A sharp crack echoes through the forest, and I am suddenly on my back with Nova above me. Red veins run from the bottom of her eyes, fangs fully extended as she lets out an angry hiss toward the west.

  “Get off her!” Keenan shouts. Another shot is fired, and Nova grunts in pain.

  “Nova, get off me! Get off me! He’ll kill you!” The next shot rings out, but Nova rolls us to the side faster than I can comprehend. My head spins at the action. “Nova,” I pant, pushing at her with effort. Even with the strength of the bracers, it has too little effect. “Run.”

  She looks down at me fretfully, her scarlet eyes reverting to brown. I can hear Keenan’s heavy footfall and give one last push.

  “I love you,” she whispers hoarsely. “I won’t let him hurt you.” She goes to touch my face one last time but thinks better of it, sprinting off in a flash of speed.

  “Are you all right?” Keenan comes sliding down next to me, mud splashing onto both of us at the action. He wraps me up in his arms to sit me up.

  “I’m okay,” I croak, wincing at the motion. I raise a hand to stop the rain from pelting in my face, suddenly feeling extremely cold and weak.

  “She bit you,” he snarls, eyeing the mark on my neck with anguish, “and you liked it.”

  I suck in a harsh breath. If I had more blood circulating in my system, I’m sure I would have been blushing. “I couldn’t help it. Vampyré fangs release a toxin that make their meals more malleable. Besides, I told her to. Vrana’s starving her. She was going crazy.”

  Keenan’s features harden as he lifts me up. The roar of engines sounds in the background, but my focus is entirely taken by the man holding me. “She’s a vampyré, Callie,” he scolds me harshly. “She would have killed you.”

  I swallow painfully, but stare him determinedly in the eye. “And you’re a lycan. You’re just as capable of killing someone. She might be driven by a hunger for blood, but you have a wolf inside you that's just as untamed and wild as that hunger.” My answer shuts him up effectively, and me, if I’m being honest.

  “We’re going home,” he grunts.

  +++

  I’m immediately given a slew of potions to drink from Zoelle when we return. Her face is crestfallen at seeing my bloodied shoulder and pallor but sets firmly a second later, ordering me into the kitchen, where I am fussed about until I’m fit to scream. I give my account to both Keenan and Zoelle, then Xander once I have finished with them. It feels like ages until I’m allowed to go back to my assigned room, Keenan hovering closely behind me.

  “Wait,” he says once the bedroom door closes behind us. “Let’s talk before you take your shower.”

  “Keenan,” his name comes out in a whine. “I’m tired and cold. I just want to get out of these clothes and under some hot water. Can’t this wait?” I don’t bother to turn around to face him. I can feel his body heat on my back, mere inches away.

  “All right,” he utters. I walk away from him and lock myself in the bathroom. I don’t need visitors this time around.

  When I’m under the fall of hot water, I feel as if I can finally breathe. Whatever tonics and potions Zoelle forced down my throat are slowly working their magic. Thank God. Nova had taken too much by just an ounce or so, enough for me to feel it.

  I turn my back to the stream of water, letting it pound against the back of my neck and shoulder. The Wardens would have my head if they learned of my actions today. Allowing Keenan to mark me? Check. Allowing a fledgling vampyré to feed on me? Check. What else will I find myself doing before the end of the day? Announcing my allegiance to the Adolphus Pack? Or have I done that already by allowing Keenan to mark me?

  I exhale long and slow. Everything I’ve known is being turned upside down. Lycans aren't mindless beasts set to kill at the slightest insult. Vampyrés can control their hunger. And Wardens sometimes do act like poachers. Maybe that is the darkness inside of me? Maybe I have become too desensitized and no better than a lowly poacher. The thought gives me a stomachache, but if Nova can rein in her thirst, then I can rein in my darkness. Perhaps the key to doing so is to reteach myself about the creatures I fought, find out for myself what they are made of instead of relying on my teachings.

  I dread to get out of the shower, but know my time is reaching its limit. Locked or not, Keenan will be coming to get me sooner rather than later. When I emerge from the steam-filled bathroom, Keenan is waiting patiently by the window. Arms folded across his chest, face expressionless though adorned with a downward tilt of his mouth. His body language communicates his frustration, but it’s the bond between us that speaks to me of his fear. And his anger.

  “Hey.”

  “Why don’t you take a seat? Zoelle said you should rest as much as possible to recover from the blood loss.”

  I raise a brow and sit on the edge of the bed. “What did you want to talk about?” My hair is bundled atop my head in a messy bun, but droplets of water drip down my neck. I wipe them away.

  “Why did you let her do that?”

  “I told you,” I say, not bothering to hide the aggravation from my tone. “He was starving her. She’s one of my best friends, and I made a promise to her sisters that I would find a way to help her. If drinking my blood helped her to find some sanity, or help her stand strong against Vrana, then who was I to deny her?”

  “She could have killed you,” he argues.

  “She didn’t,” I counter swiftly. Keenan turns his regard toward the rain outside, his disappointment washing through the bond. “I know why you’re really upset,” I finally manage to say, “so do you want me to say it, or you?” Keenan doesn’t say a word. “It didn’t mean anything, Keenan. It was just a chemical reaction—�
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