The Darkness Visible

by Tori de Clare

  He found her in the garden behind the pub, sitting at a wooden table, sipping on a drink, watching the sunset and listening to the sounds of early dusk.

  ‘I love this place,’ she said as he approached. She didn’t look round, but had her eyes trained on the sinking sun. ‘I love the colours this time of evening and the way the light casts shadows on the hills. So peaceful up here.’

  ‘It’s beautiful,’ he said settling opposite her, sliding his keys and wallet in his trouser pocket under the table.

  She looked at him finally and smiled. She had a great smile. He liked her lips, how the top lip was plump and sat luxuriously on a slimmer lower lip; he loved her lip shade, a glossy coral against her dark hair. It matched the colour of her top beneath a pale leather jacket.

  ‘I see you’ve finally taken your wedding ring off,’ she said, glancing down.

  Nathan tipped his head to one side. ‘It’s called facing reality. Let’s take a stroll until the light’s gone. Come on.’

  ‘Will they reserve our table?’

  ‘Yeah, course.’

  ‘OK.’ She stood up and joined him and he took her hand and led her away from the pub towards a murky path that ran parallel to a ditch. There was a great umbrella of trees which blocked the light on each side, but in the distance, the trees ended and there was the promise of light and lush green grass dotted with buttercups.

  They wandered down the dim path until Nathan pinned Kerry Marshall to the nearest tree.

  ‘You’re irresistible, you know that?’ he said, giving her a heavy dose of close eye contact.

  ‘You’re not so bad yourself.’

  He smiled. ‘You don’t know me at all.’

  ‘You may well bore me when I do,’ she said. ‘Soak it up while you can.’

  Nathan liked that enough to put his face to hers and torment her with his lips. He could smell his own scent now. His aftershave overpowered her perfume. He played with her lips, lightly touching them, breathing into her until she grabbed him forcefully by the neck and kissed him roughly.

  Her phone rang, just a dull vibration, nothing piercing. She gently pushed him back, panting slightly. Then she laughed and withdrew her phone from her pocket.

  ‘Don’t get it,’ he said, testing her.

  She looked at the screen. ‘I have to. It’s Jake, my partner. He’s on duty tonight.’ She put her fingers to his lips. ‘Quiet,’ she said. He liked the way she took charge sometimes.

  ‘Hey, Jake, what’s up?’ she said into her phone, turning away from him slightly.

  Nathan heard a faraway voice say, ‘You’ll never guess what.’

  She moved a couple of steps away. Nathan shuffled towards her while her back was turned.

  ‘What?’

  He picked out a few words from the response, enough to gather that something had been found.

  ‘Whose?’ Kerry took another couple of steps away and said, ‘Where?’

  During the next few seconds, Nathan only caught one word. Canal. He stepped away from her. He didn’t want her to catch him listening. Kerry was asking one-word questions.

  ‘Make?’

  Nathan didn’t hear a response. He was busy making connections and coming up with a name – Simon Wilde. Goosebumps raised the hair on his arms, which prickled against his shirt sleeves. He stood stock still.

  Kerry Marshall was looking at Nathan in silence. He didn’t know how long she’d been watching him like this or when she’d finished her conversation. It was the wary look on her face that forced him into a snap decision.

  ‘Kerry?’ he said. ‘Can I talk to you?’

  ‘Sure,’ she looked at him uncertainly.

  The light was dimming. ‘Let’s go somewhere quieter.’

  ‘Than this?’ she said. It was as silent as a cemetery.

  Nathan pointed to the light source at the end of the trees, where the grass swayed with buttercups in the fading light. ‘This way.’

  He took her hand and her towed along until they were out in the open again. The city of Manchester was a huge dark bruise in the distance. The sun was visibly sinking behind the buildings. Lampposts were starting to respond. Little fairy lights dotted the landscape which rolled for miles.

  They sat on a large stone and observed the peaceful scene, until Nathan said, ‘I heard what you were talking about, Kerry. Just odd words, but enough.’

  She nodded once.

  ‘Have they found Simon Wilde?’ he asked.

  ‘I’m not allowed to talk about it, Nathan.’

  ‘I understand that.’ A pause. ‘Look, I want to tell you in the strongest terms that I had nothing to do with his disappearance, OK?’

  She looked at him steadily. ‘Did you know him, Simon Wilde?’

  ‘Is this an interview?’

  ‘Don’t be daft.’

  Nathan said, ‘He was Lorie’s boyfriend, nothing to do with me. It was Naomi’s eighteenth birthday the night I met Simon and Lorie for the first time. They were there as guests at the Hamiltons’ house. We got engaged that night so it was very memorable. I don’t remember much about Simon except that he was pretty dull, to be honest.’

  ‘So how did you come to have a relationship with Lorie if she had a boyfriend and you had a fiancée?’

  Nathan worked some regret into his tone. ‘Well, Lorie worked at the house, so I saw her quite a bit. I got in touch with her behind Naomi’s back because I wanted to get Naomi a wedding present and didn’t know what to get, so I thought I’d ask her best friend. It started innocently.’

  ‘These things usually do.’

  ‘Yeah, well I never got on with Annabel. I think she was jealous of me. They’re twins, you know –’

  ‘With different birthdays. Born either side of midnight. Yeah, yeah.’

  Nathan nodded. ‘So, Lorie offered to come shopping with me and we fixed up a time. From there, it was all too easy. Lorie was attracted to me and just boldly told me so.’

  ‘Understandable,’ Kerry Marshall said with a small smile. She looked up at him through long lashes. ‘You’re magnetic, Nathan.’

  Nathan absorbed the comment and pretended not to notice. ‘Anyway, it’s no excuse on my part, but Naomi wanted to keep her virginity until the wedding. I was cool with it until Lorie came on to me pretty strong. Thing is, I should have been stronger.’

  Nathan performed his eye-watering trick and Kerry put an arm around him. ‘Was it just the once?’

  ‘I wish.’ He stopped. A pause to help him think a little. ‘I’ll be honest with you, Kerry,’ he said, searching her eyes. ‘It was three times until I put a stop to it. Lorie looks so much like Naomi, you see. I know I never should have let things go that far. I’m totally ashamed.’

  ‘Did Lorie go on seeing Simon once you two had finished?’

  ‘I really don’t know.’

  ‘Do you still love her . . . Naomi, I mean?’

  Nathan searched for a right answer, if there was one. He didn’t get any of this emotional crap, but it gave him a buzz to experiment with it. His hesitation looked fine, he decided – gave the impression of someone deep in thought. ‘She’s the only girl I’ve ever loved,’ was what he came up with. Cheesy? Kerry was straight-faced. ‘I’m sorry, Kerry, I can’t just switch my feelings off because my wife is sleeping with my brother. I do love her, but it’s beyond repair. I accept that it’s over. She doesn’t trust me anymore. I don’t trust her either.’ He took her hand now and played with her fingers one by one. ‘She took all the money and all our wedding gifts.’

  ‘Really?’

  ‘Yes. Her parents gave us a million as a wedding present as you probably know. There must have been lots more money in the cards. I never even opened them.’

  ‘When did you find out you were going to get a million?’

  ‘A few days before the wedding when they gave us a cheque. I couldn’t believe it. We paid it into our joint account and then she moved all the money into Dan’s account when she left me on our honeymoon. Naomi d
oesn’t do forgiveness.’

  ‘That’s what her ex-boyfriend said.’

  ‘Tom?’ Nathan said, and Kerry nodded. ‘Naomi and Dan left me penniless, the pair of them. I lost my home, my wife and my financial security – to my brother. That’s why I’m going to fight Naomi for half the money. I love her, but I have to be fair to myself, Kerry. There has to be some justice.’

  Her hair stirred in a cool breeze. She reached for a long stick of grass and pulled it from the ground. ‘I absolutely agree. I still can’t believe they walked.’ She looked out over the horizon. Nathan followed her gaze. ‘I could lend you some money, just until you get straightened out.’

  Nathan looked at Kerry, but she kept staring at some point in the distance. Somehow, he remained calm, though his mind was buzzing. Reverse psychology was a winner normally. ‘I can’t accept a loan.’

  ‘Course you can. I have savings, a few thousand, no big deal. I could help you out. I’d like to. And by the way, dinner’s on me tonight, no arguments.’

  ‘I wouldn’t,’ said a voice behind them.

  Naomi was standing a couple of metres away looking down on him. The shock stiffened Nathan’s body. She had a black rucksack over one shoulder. What was she doing here? How long had she been standing there?

  ‘Naomi?’ Nathan said in as soft a tone as he could manage. ‘This is a surprise.’

  ‘I’ll bet.’

  ‘What are you doing here?’

  ‘I needed to see you, Nathan.’ She paused to shift her weight and stuff her keys into the front pocket of her jeans. ‘You remember the last chat we had about money in my treehouse – the time you dragged me out of bed with a knife to my throat so we could have a midnight chat?’

  ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’

  ‘Yes you do. You threatened me, so we moved house. Well, nothing was really resolved, so I drove round to your parents’ house tonight and saw you were on your way out and followed you here. I didn’t realise you were meeting someone,’ she said, flicking a glance at Kerry Marshall.

  Nathan found that his right hand had balled into a fist. He wanted to ram it into Naomi’s mouth and leave her toothless. ‘Yes, well, this is my friend –’

  ‘Kerry.’ Naomi cut in. ‘PC Kerry Marshall, isn’t it?’ she said, looking her up and down. ‘I remember meeting you at the police station.’ Naomi smiled.

  Kerry nodded and said nothing, but pulled at a long piece of grass. Nathan resented being in a tight spot, and suddenly he didn’t know what to say or do in the fading light. He flicked another glance at Kerry. Her jaw was tense while Naomi’s face was smug.

  ‘What did you want to discuss with me? We could talk in private for a minute.’

  ‘Oh, no need,’ Naomi said sweetly. ‘You two are out together tonight and Kerry’s offered to pay for dinner. I wouldn’t want to hold you up for long.’

  Nathan managed a tight smile. ‘So, what can I do for you?’

  ‘I’d like an annulment of our marriage please. I think we both agree that it was over before it ever began.’

  Kerry Marshall was biting her lip and playing with her bracelet now. Nathan looked between the two of them and said, ‘An annulment has to meet certain criteria.’

  ‘Of course it does. And we both have to be in agreement for it to happen.’

  ‘We don’t qualify for an annulment, Naomi.’

  ‘Why not?’

  ‘You know exactly why not.’

  She smiled again. Nathan’s fist tightened. ‘I thought you might say that. So I arranged to see this lovely nurse who examined me, then got a second opinion – he was a consultant, can’t remember his name – but anyway my dad had to pay for his time, and they’ve both signed this letter to say that I’m . . . how can I put it – untouched.’ She pulled a white envelope from her rucksack and held it out. ‘Want to read it?’

  Struggling for words, Nathan said, ‘What are you talking about now? Are you on medication?’

  ‘I asked Dan that question once because you told me he was ill.’

  ‘How is Dan?’

  ‘I wouldn’t know.’

  Kerry was fidgeting, becoming uncomfortable, checking her phone. Nathan’s mind clicked into gear. The bitch must be crushed, and quickly.

  ‘You must be ill, Naomi,’ he said, voice rising. ‘You went on honeymoon with me. We made love for days and you told me that you loved me. Then you ran away and started telling the most cruel lies about me. The police actually thought I was capable of hurting you. Then you slept with my brother and I had to lose my home because I couldn’t face him anymore. My whole family is divided and I have to listen to my mum crying about it at night. And now you come here to tell me you have evidence we never slept together.’ Kerry was still examining her bracelet. ‘I still have feelings for you, but I’m trying to rebuild my life, can’t you see? What are you trying to do to me?’

  Nathan produced some moisture in his eyes and made sure Kerry noticed before he stood and took the three paces that landed him in front of Naomi, close. She didn’t budge.

  ‘What’s wrong with your eyes?’ she asked.

  ‘It’s called getting upset, OK? Just because you never feel any emotion –’

  Naomi laughed. Kerry Marshall looked up in surprise. ‘I think it’s time we ended this little charade, Nathan, don’t you? If I had an Oscar –’

  ‘It was never a charade to me. I gave you everything I had.’

  ‘Which was thirty-five grand of debt, a sack full of damaging lies and your mother’s ring.’

  Her mouth twitched in the direction of a grin.

  ‘You need help, Naomi,’ he said through clenched teeth and glassy eyes.

  ‘That’s just what I thought,’ she said, ‘which is why I decided to get this medical note to prove that we’ve never slept together, let alone left the country together.’

  ‘You’ve been sleeping with my brother for months now.’

  ‘Says who?’

  Nathan’s mind was blank. He blurted out, ‘Kerry saw you leaving Dan’s on Christmas Eve.’

  A pause while Naomi’s mouth fell open. ‘And she thought it was OK to share that information with you, did she? No doubt she also told you where I lived, which is in breach of my right to privacy and amounts to professional misconduct.’

  Kerry had her eyes closed and her hand on her forehead. Nathan realised his error. ‘No, actually, Kerry is blameless. It was Dan who told me where you lived.’

  ‘Yeah right,’ Naomi said. ‘Dan had no idea. Why are you lying, Nathan? It’s all you know isn’t it? You’re a compulsive liar and a trickster. You’re incapable of honesty.’

  ‘You’re sleeping with my brother. You’re the liar, Naomi. Why do you twist everything?’

  Naomi sighed and drew a deep breath. ‘You know, for an intelligent person who prides himself in the art of critical thinking, you’re sounding pretty irrational. I have a letter here which proves my innocence. You’re going to have to decide what to do about it.’

  Nathan snatched the envelope and opened it and scanned the letter, though he could only see a blur of black and white. ‘Money can buy anything, can’t it?’

  ‘Most things, yes.’

  ‘You make me sick. How much did your dad pay these people to write this fiction?’ Nathan said, shredding the letter and scattering it on the ground like confetti.

  Naomi glared at him. A breeze whistled through the long grass lifting the scraps of paper. Kerry Marshall stood up and took a couple of paces towards the city of Manchester.

  ‘Good thing I sent a copy of that letter to the solicitor’s office.’

  ‘What solicitor?’ Nathan asked.

  ‘The one where you’re going to meet me ten days from now. We have an appointment with a Mr Cavendish.’

  ‘Why should I meet you there?’

  ‘Because you need to fill out the annulment form. I want you to do that in the presence of a solicitor. Then he’ll send the papers to the courts.’


  ‘I’m taking you to court for a divorce, Naomi, so we can divide the money you stole off me. I’m not meeting you at any solicitor’s.’

  ‘I’ve got a settlement right here,’ Naomi said, taking the bag off her shoulder. She opened it and Nathan peered inside. It was bulging with cash. Nathan’s eyes widened. ‘You were absolutely right. You once predicted that I’d beg you to just take my money and leave me alone. Well, this is my offer and it’s final. Fifty thousand.’

  ‘Fifty grand?’ he yelled. ‘Are you kidding me?’ But he kept looking into the bag. It was full of crisp twenty pound notes. ‘That’s less than ten percent of what you owe me.’

  ‘It’s ten percent more than I owe you, but I want my annulment, so it’s a concession.’

  Kerry Marshall looked over her shoulder and spoke, finally. ‘If that letter holds any truth, you won’t need Nathan’s cooperation to get your annulment.’

  ‘Kerry!’ Nathan shouted.

  ‘What?’ Kerry Marshall spun around and left her hair behind, floating in the wind. ‘Let her get her annulment if she can, Nathan. I say do nothing. There’s no truth in her letter, so she’s bluffing, right?’

  ‘Well of course she’s bluffing.’

  ‘You’d better hope so,’ Naomi said.

  Kerry Marshall looked at Nathan. Nathan looked inside the bag again and had to resist the impulse to snatch it.

  No one moved.

  Kerry looked at Naomi. ‘Maybe Nathan doesn’t want the crumbs off your table and he isn’t willing to lie to a solicitor, which I have to warn you, is a criminal offence.’

  Naomi put one hand on her hip and glared at Kerry. ‘Are you threatening me?’

  Kerry Marshall moved a couple of paces forward. ‘I’m saying the show’s over. Walk away now and we won’t say any more about this. I’m sure you wouldn’t want me to take that medical letter down to the station where trained officers might be sent to interview the people who’ve signed it.’

  Nathan shifted his weight uncomfortably. ‘Yeah just go, Naomi, before you land yourself in trouble. You’re making a fool of yourself and that’s the last thing I want. I’ve given you every opportunity to get some help. I’ve done the best I can for you.’