Only the Strongest Survive

by Ian Fox

  *

  What happened next was what she had feared most. They had a drink in a bar and then she could resist him no more. She found Blake so attractive and it had been such a long time since she had been with a man.

  He lived on the fourth floor of an older brownstone. Hungry for love and tenderness, they nearly broke the lock to his apartment trying to get in and immediately tore each other’s clothes off after the door was closed. Their hands were everywhere, as if trying to feel every inch of each other, kissing, biting, and sucking.

  He lifted her as if she were a feather and carried her to his bed. He liked the fact that she was fully his and she enjoyed feeling his strong hands on her. Not wanting to part from his lips, she kept pulling him toward her. They swapped positions a number of times, as if competing for being the one on top. Emely won in the end. She wanted to be above him; even now she wanted to be in control.

  *

  Emely had hoped to spend the rest of her life with Blake, but it was not to be. At the beginning, their relationship was passionate. Despite that, later it turned into routine, everyday meetings. Finally they had to admit they weren’t a suitable match. They parted with no bitterness or sadness.

  A year later, Emely’s company ran into problems and she became involved in some shady business. She needed a good lawyer but couldn’t afford the most expensive ones, so she called Blake and explained it all to him.

  “It’s no problem, Emely. If you want, I can come around this afternoon and you can show me the papers. Until I see the contracts, I can’t promise anything.” A few hours later he picked up all the documents.

  After spending the night examining them, he called her early in the morning. “I think we’ll win. You did want to go to court, didn’t you?”

  “I don’t know, Blake. Anything. I want the money back that I invested.”

  “OK, don’t worry. I have a few good friends among the judiciary and I’m sure we’ll manage to take this thing to completion within six months. Is that alright with you?”

  “I don’t know how to thank you.”

  “Don’t thank me, I haven’t done anything yet. Leave your worries to me and concentrate on other deals.”

  As he had promised, the trial started six months later. She was amazed when she saw his appearance in front of the jury. The loving, gentle man she had known turned into a merciless tyrant who did everything in his power to beat her opponent. His quiet voice became as deep as a bear’s and almost too loud for the small courtroom. A few times he came so close to the witnesses that they nearly sank into their seats.

  When finally the verdict was read in Emely’s favor, all she could say was, “Amazing. I cannot believe it.”

  That was when she decided he’d be the legal representative of her company. In addition to a high salary, she also offered him a share in her company if he represented her for at least ten years. Her decision proved to be a good investment.

  Chapter 12

  _______________________

  During the next two weeks, Emely and John were together nearly all the time. In the morning, they followed the trading on the stock exchange and speculated. At noon, John went to the kitchen and fixed them something to eat. They had their lunch in Emely’s room, and the trading went on until five o’clock. Afterward, they had a nap and then dinner, which continued to surprise Emely.

  While eating, they talked about different matters in a relaxed manner. Emely always tried to put John in a good mood and ensured there were no awkward silences. She knew how to listen for hours. Often, John was quiet and with time she learned how to get him to talk and then he sometimes found it hard to stop. When he was in a bad mood, she directed the conversation toward subjects that cheered him up. If he was nervous, she looked at him with her gentle eyes and puckered her sensual lips so that he soon calmed down. She wanted him to enjoy every minute with her, and he did.

  Gradually he began revealing things he would have never mentioned in the past. Once, he confessed that he used to wet the bed when he was a child. This embarrassed him and Ronald kept scolding him. He even told her that once he really had been in love. He was eighteen at the time and met a girl from the neighboring street. All the boys envied him since she was very beautiful. John used to wait all day for her to come out of her house. Until one day she didn’t. He rang the bell and she screamed at him through the open window that she didn’t care about him anymore, in such a loud voice that the whole neighborhood could hear. He nearly died from embarrassment and this experience had made him hate all girls.

  Emely listened and always offered words of comfort. When necessary, she was critical and when he was vulnerable, she caressed him with her responses, noticing how he got mellower with every passing day.

  Everything was going according to plan. She still saw in him an enemy who was keeping her incarcerated and she just waited for her moment to arrive. She felt it getting closer. A few times she had had an opportunity to hit him with a bottle or another hard object, but she was never sure that he wasn’t watching her without her being aware of it. She was waiting for a moment when he’d turn his back to her. Then she would show no mercy.

  After dinner they frequently went for a short walk around the nearby clearing and enjoyed the sounds of the crickets and other wildlife. Often they did not go to bed until after midnight. If John had errands in town, he drove there straight after lunch so that he could spend the evening with her. He no longer went out late at night. A few times he became aware of feeling stressed and nervous during the few hours he wasn’t with her. It passed as soon as they saw each other again. He never thought of her as a sexual object and was still getting flashes of horrifying images at night so that he woke drenched in sweat, thinking she was dead.

  What he saw in her was someone with whom he felt good. He didn’t delve into these feelings, just surrendered to the relationship they had and was happy that it was as it was. Until now he had never met anyone who wanted to spend as much time with him and listen to him for hours. Emely was the first who never complained and always agreed with him. She possessed everything he wanted from someone with whom he would like to live.

  One evening Emely seemed a little absentminded. He knew she was thinking of friends and that she was upset. Her eyes were becoming moist and he could see immense sadness in them. When he went to bed that night, he was sad too. He was aware of reality and thought how one day he would have to let her go. This thought seemed suffocating and produced a hitherto unknown pain in his heart. It scared him so much that he chased the thought away at once, it was just too painful. Only a few hours without her seemed torture to him; a few days or even weeks were inconceivable. He would go crazy.

  Days passed. While he admired her and enjoyed every moment with her, she waited. Waited and waited, never giving up hope. She had learned patience. Like a spider capable of spending days perfectly still sitting in its net, knowing that prey would appear sooner or later. She, too, possessed a huge desire to kill. The only difference was that she was not waiting for prey but a careless moment that would save her from her prison. On the outside she was calm and gentle, but evil was brewing inside her and she often imagined cruel scenes. In her imagination, she had no mercy, only hatred that grew with every day.

  *

  She needs company, John suddenly thought. In the afternoon he went to a pet shop in town. He spent a long time looking at the yappy, small, cuddly bundles that were begging with their pleading eyes to be given a home. He hesitated for quite some time before he finally chose one of the puppies.

  When Emely saw the helpless animal, she was surprised. Pressing the little puppy close to her chest, she squealed and nearly cried with joy. She had wanted a dog all her life. When she was a child she kept asking the nuns, but they soon took the idea out of her head. Later her business and desire for success didn’t allow her any time for herself, let alone anyone or anything else.

  “He’s so sweet,” she kept saying as she cuddled the frightened dog. “
Where did you get him?”

  John was excited to see Emely so touched. He had spent days wondering how to bring a little joy into her life and now he knew that he had hit the jackpot. “I bought her for you. You’ve often mentioned that you like animals.”

  “For me? I can’t believe it. But this is impossible. Who’ll take him for walks? Dogs have their needs, just like people.”

  Emely’s nose was pressed into the puppy’s furry coat and she never stopped stroking the frightened dog.

  “In the morning and at lunchtime I’ll take her and in the evening we’ll go together.”

  “And what if Ronald appears?”

  “I’ve thought about that too. If she doesn’t bark, there won’t be a problem. If she does, I’ll quickly come and get her and keep her upstairs. It’s a Yorkshire terrier and they’re so small that they can live in a constrained space, like your room. Besides, they have such short legs that they get tired after only a twenty-minute walk. They don’t need as much attention as some dogs. Oh, and it’s a she, not a he.”

  “Oh, John, I’m so glad,” Emely said, nearly crying. Still cuddling the dog, she put a hand on one of his shoulders and kissed him spontaneously on the forehead. A moment of confusion and silence followed. Emely wasn’t sure why she had done it. She was so happy and perhaps at that moment she really did want to kiss him, but she regretted it only a second later.

  John was breathless. His body felt heavy, as if made of iron, and his face got incredibly hot. His cheeks turned bright-red, while his heart became a time bomb, the ticking of which seemed very loud to him.

  *

  While cooking dinner he was still confused and tense. He forgot to add salt to the meat and oil to the salad dressing. His thoughts had been unable to move away from that warm kiss. What’s happened to me, I can’t stop thinking about her. He longed to touch her gently, but was afraid of being rejected. He didn’t want to take her by force and wanted her to desire him as well. But that seemed impossible.

  *

  At dinner, the main theme of their conversation was the newcomer, whom they named Kitty. Emely kept getting up from the table, ensuring Kitty didn’t wander too far away. In her excitement she didn’t even notice that the meat was not salted, but John did and spread a pinch of salt over her plate when she wasn’t looking.

  “You’ll be less bored when you’re alone in your room,” he said while she spent more time on the floor than at the table.

  “John, I’m so happy,” she said sincerely. “I’ve always wanted a dog and don’t really know why I never got one. Now I see how much pleasure I’ve missed out on.”

  He smiled briefly and looked down in embarrassment. Her beautiful blue eyes sent his blood gushing in his veins every time he looked at her. “After dinner, the three of us can go for a short stroll.”

  “A wonderful idea.”

  Without a thought of what she was eating, Emely gobbled the meal down, barely able to wait for dinner to be over so she could go and see Kitty running around outside. Her enthusiasm was like a child’s. In recent years she had concluded some deals that were worth millions of dollars, she had bought factories, hotel chains and other large companies, but had never felt as much joy as she did when that little puppy danced around her legs. She watched John looking at Kitty for a few moments and in a way he no longer seemed so terrible to her. She stopped being afraid of him. His eyes, which in her view always reflected nothing but disdain and coldness, now seemed warm and gentle. Maybe he’s not that bad after all, she thought. Oh no, I’m getting sentimental. I’ve just fallen for one of his tricks.

  Before they stepped out, he put a restraint in his pocket. If Ronald showed up, John would have to fasten Emely to a tree so that she couldn’t get away. He was not so stupid as to leave her alone in the woods, knowing she would never wait there for him. He had searched for another, less painful solution to this problem, but so far had found none.

  *

  They walked for approximately half an hour and Kitty was getting tired. Her red tongue hung out and her tummy that had been filled not long ago was now completely empty. John lifted her and carried her for a while. The poor thing was so exhausted that she didn’t resist at all and enjoyed looking at the world from a higher perspective. It was now Emely who was hopping around, one moment on John’s left and then right, unable to contain her excitement. She kept reaching for Kitty, stroking her soft coat. In doing this she once or twice came dangerously close to John. Every time she touched him with a part of her body he felt a hot flush all over, as if someone had poured warm water over him. He was inhaling deeply, smelling her perfume, and reacting like a teenager.

  *

  When they parted later that evening to go to bed, his good mood turned into a bad one, a kind of agony. He became nervous and restless, everything bothering him. The room seemed too small, the mattress too hard. He thought about going into town, but changed his mind; he was sick of drinking and staying up late. Often he had come home so drunk that the next day he couldn’t remember his journey home. Besides, the thought of having sex with other women was no longer appealing. He was angry with himself—now that he could afford the most beautiful women in the world, he no longer desired them. An attractive man in his early thirties with a wallet full of money should have no problems with women. All he’d have to do is to appear in one of the casinos and start showing off and women would come to him without being asked. He had always wanted a life like that, but now that he could have it all, he was no longer interested. Instead, he wanted something he knew he couldn’t have—Emely. Every time he closed his eyes, she appeared in front of him. He dreamt of her body, of caressing it, and making love all night long. For the first time in his life he didn’t want just a naked body to empty himself into, but someone to hold. He dreamt that she kissed him of her own accord. He wanted her to want him.

  *

  John slept very badly that night and it was not nightmares this time that stopped him from sleeping. He felt so alone and the desire to approach her in whatever way grew with every passing day. This desire was turning into a torture that he found increasingly difficult to control.

  *

  Before, he had been happy with his life; he wasn’t doing brilliantly well, but neither did he have reason to complain. He had never before suffered, never felt like he did now, not wanting to go on living like this. At the same time he didn’t want to go back to his old life. He was trapped. He saw no way out and this increasingly bothered him. Is this love? he thought bitterly. Let her go to hell.

  *

  “Good morning,” Emely said to him, her voice full of energy. “Kitty can barely wait to go out and relieve herself.”

  John dug his fingers into his hair and smiled faintly. He put his hand in front of his mouth and yawned discreetly. His eyes were red from lack of sleep. “Then it’s best if I go now.”

  “Couldn’t I come with you? I’d like to so much.”

  John turned toward her, intending to say no, but when he looked into her blue eyes that pleaded so earnestly …. “Well,” he said, wrinkling his forehead and thinking it out: they would definitely avoid Ronald if they left through the back door. And coming back, they would be able to see his car from far away.

  Emely took advantage of his hesitation and the expectant look in her eyes now surpassed even that in Kitty’s. “Please, John, I’d like it so very much.”

  “OK,” he said with a smile. He was simply unable to resist her, but regretted it immediately and became angry with himself for having become so soft lately.

  Emely joyfully picked up Kitty and kissed her on her black nose so that the puppy started sneezing. “Let’s go then.”

  *

  Emely carefully watched Kitty running around. Her eyes stopped on John for a moment and she had to admire his broad shoulders. He was an attractive man, she had to grant him that. In spite of this, the thought of him approaching her in any way always made her shudder. Although he had greatly changed recently and s
he was no longer as afraid of him, she preferred him to keep some distance from her.

  They walked side by side for over an hour. Emely was intoxicated by the morning beauty of the natural world around them and John was intoxicated by her. She felt an incredible energy she had not known before. Her former life had taken place mostly in various offices and she had only rarely come into contact with the countryside. She inhaled deeply of the moist air, as if wanting to fill herself with even more energy. Now that she was out even less, she knew how to value the beauty of the world outside and became aware of how mistaken her former life had been. Her ceaseless desire for power and wealth had blinded her so much that she often stayed at work late into the night instead of spending time with someone she loved. Instead, she could have walked unrestrained in the parks or the nearby woods, if only she had taken the time. She had had to try so hard to succeed in the world in which men still prevailed that she soon didn’t know how to stop. Only now, when her freedom had been forcibly taken, did she become truly aware of the mistakes she had made. It made her feel vulnerable.

  She had acted wrongly when she greedily took over companies that ran into short-term trouble. As soon as she received information that a firm had liquidity problems, she, without any remorse, had spread false rumors about it in two or three banks, which in turn led the other banks to panic, too. It was true that some of these companies would have gone bankrupt had she not taken them over, but some would have perhaps saved themselves and continued to do business successfully. What she had been doing was not right and she was becoming increasingly aware of this. In fact, I have not lived at all, she thought. I was just the propelling force in a huge money factory that was growing bigger and bigger.