“And that was strictly pleasure?”
I thought about that trip and shook my head with a chuckle. “Well, I had intended it to be that way, but I ran into some business while I was down there.”
“So, not a vacation then.”
“No. I guess it has been a while. When was your last vacation?”
“Umm.” She looked up, like she was trying to count out dates or something in her head. It was cute how her nose bunched up as she thought. “I guess it’s been years. I haven’t taken a vacation since before I started med school.”
“You were a very serious student, weren’t you?”
“How did you know?” she smiled.
“And I bet you never blew off class because you were hung over or just didn’t feel like going.”
“I almost did. I went to a party my freshman year and got really drunk. I woke up the next morning feeling terrible, but I went to class anyway. It cost my parents a lot of money to put me through school and there was no way I was going to disrespect that. What about you? Did you go to college?”
“I got my degree in computer engineering while I was in the military. It’s come in quite handy.”
“So, that’s how you know how to bypass my alarm and sneak into my house.”
“It’s one of my many talents.” I gave her a big smile and she rolled her eyes at me.
“You have quite the ego.”
“I have the skills to back it up, so I don’t see that as a weakness.”
“Why do I get the feeling that you have the skills for a lot of things?”
And just like that, something changed in the air around us. Her skin flushed, meaning she hadn’t realized how dirty that sounded.
“I’d be willing to show you my skills anytime you want.”
She stood quickly and brought her cup over to the sink. “I think I’ll go take a shower. I have a lot to do today.”
“Want some company?”
“No, I don’t think that’s necessary.”
“I meant it more for me. It’s been a few days since I’ve showered. I’m pretty sure that rancid odor is me, and since your cousin kicked my ass, I’m not really able to clean myself.”
That wasn’t true at all. It had been a while, but I’d been in worse condition and gotten along just fine. Still, if I could get her to offer, I’d take her up on it in a heartbeat. She looked like she wasn’t sure if she wanted to go there with me, but the doctor part of her brain must have kicked in because she looked over my body and I saw the wheels turning in her head.
“If I help you, there’s no touching on your part. This is just me helping you out because I know you must be in a lot of pain.”
“Scout’s honor,” I grinned.
“I really don’t believe that you were ever a scout. This is such a bad idea,” she muttered under her breath.
“I told you I love bad ideas.”
“Come on. Let’s get this over with.”
I planned to use this time with her wisely and if I did it right, there would be no getting it over with. I followed her upstairs and was surprised when she stepped into the bathroom in a bra and panties. She shot me a look that said not to mess with her, so I held up my hand, letting her know I wouldn’t try anything. Well, I wouldn’t touch her. That didn’t mean there weren’t other ways to try to seduce her.
I pulled down my pants and caught the strangled noise she made when my cock bobbed free. She turned on the water to let it warm up and then wrapped my shoulder in saran wrap.
“That’ll have to do for now. We’ll just have to be careful not to get it wet. I’ll clean and change your bandage after we get you showered.” She undid the wrap from around my ribs and I hated that it hurt more now that there wasn’t the pressure to stabilize them.
“Thanks,” I said, gripping her chin so that she would look at me. “I’m sorry it took me so long to thank you. You’ve been taking care of me when you didn’t have to.”
“I would do it for anyone,” she said quietly.
“I don’t want you to do it for anyone. I want you to only do it for me. I know you feel it between us, too. We could have something explosive here.”
She took a step back from me. “We would only ever have sex and you know it. Now step in the shower and let’s get you cleaned up.”
I stepped under the water, letting the warm water relax my muscles. I wanted to put my whole body under, but instead, I stood off to the side so I didn’t get my shoulder wet. She stepped in with me and reached up to remove the shower head. She rinsed my hair and then ran the water over my body. Dried blood trickled down my body, leaving light pink swirling down the drain. She grabbed the washcloth and squirted some girly smelling shit onto it and then lathered it up. Starting with my good shoulder, she ran the washcloth over my skin and down to my pecs. I groaned when she lingered just a little too long over my nipples.
I was hardening and she was standing so close that I was sure if she moved even the slightest bit, I would be brushing against her. Nothing I could do about that. Her hands trailed over my abs and settled against the bruises on my ribs. When she bent over, I nearly lost it, thinking that she was about to suck my dick, but instead, she kissed my bruises. My chest heaved at her touch and I was confused as hell. This woman was repulsed by my actions, but she still wanted me. I didn’t know if she was coming or going half the time.
Her hand slid down further and she looked up at me from under her lashes as she wrapped her hand around my raging erection. Damn, she was beautiful.
“I thought you didn’t want that?”
“I thought I didn’t, too. I guess my body was thinking something else.”
“You need to be sure,” I said, stepping into her space. “Once I have you, you’re mine. I might not be able to give you the life you want, but I won’t let anyone else have you either.”
She jerked me harder, panting as her grip tightened around me. “Does that mean you’re mine, too?”
“There hasn’t been anyone but you since I first saw you. I promise, there never will be again.”
“I think you’re clean enough. I need to get you into my bed.”
She shut off the water and threw a towel at me that I used to wipe off as much water as possible. I followed her into the bedroom and for the first time wondered how the hell I was going to do this with a shoulder that didn’t work and busted up ribs. She led me over to the bed and pushed lightly on my chest, down into the mattress.
“Before we do this, I’m assuming you’ve been with a lot of random women. Do I have anything to worry about?”
“I’ve never been inside a woman without protection.”
“Good. Then I want you bare inside me. Is that good for you?”
For once, I found myself completely tongue tied and could only nod my head in agreement. She stepped over to me and straddled my waist, wrapping one arm around my good shoulder.
“I’m not much into foreplay. How about you?”
“I love foreplay, but if you want to sink down on my- holy shit,” I groaned as she took me in with one swift move. My eyes crossed as I tried to control my body from erupting in the next few seconds. I hadn’t thought that it would be like this if I ever got inside her. I had imagined me being in control and having my way with her, but instead she had me by the balls here.
“Tell me if I hurt you.”
“Not a chance in hell. You could make me bleed and I wouldn’t say a fucking thing.”
She moved faster and faster, pushing down on my shoulder to give herself leverage. It pulled at my other side and caused some pain in my ribs, but I had never been harder in my life. She felt so good that I was finding it hard to really take in all that she was offering me. Her perky breasts were bouncing in front of me and I wanted to slip the cup of her bra down and take her nipple in my mouth, but I couldn’t do that and keep myself balanced at the same time. If I ever got the chance to do this again, I was going to take my time with her and memorize every inch of her bo
dy.
“Ride me harder. I want to feel your pussy clench around my cock.”
That must have done it for her, because she tightened around me, strangling my cock to the point of pain. I came hard inside her and then collapsed back onto the bed. Pain shot through me as I landed on the soft mattress. Shit, that probably wasn’t the smartest thing to do. It had felt good in the moment, but now I was seeing spots. The last thought I had before I passed out was that I didn’t really give a shit. It had been well worth it.
CHAPTER SIX
Kate
CRAP. I HAD fucked him into passing out. I giggled at the thought, and even though it was totally inappropriate, I couldn’t help myself. Part of me couldn’t believe I had actually had sex with him. I was a rule follower and I always tried to do the right thing, and Knight was the antithesis of everything I believed in. Yet, there was something so right in what he did, which made me question everything I thought I stood for.
Was it possible that he was right and I was wrong? Were there some people out there that couldn’t be saved? I didn’t want to believe that. I had always thought that if people got the treatment they needed, they could get better. Even a rapist could be reformed if he went through the proper therapy. But maybe Knight was right in that the victims never got justice.
I looked down at my dark knight sleeping on the bed and wondered if he would ever consider reforming for me. I wanted to believe that there was still something good inside him, and I could even swear from time to time that I saw a glimmer of it. Even though I thought his form of doling out justice was wrong, I knew that he was doing it for the right reasons. I couldn’t sit here all day and think about it. The debate going on in my head was too much to deal with, so I got up, throwing on a t-shirt, and went downstairs to make breakfast. When I brought it back up on a tray, Garrick was sitting up in bed with a smirk on his face.
“I think that’s supposed to be my job.”
“I’ll forgive you. You have plenty of time to make it up to me.”
His smile faded a little and I wondered what I had said that made that happen. But before I could let my mind wander too much, he linked his hand with mine and pulled me closer.
“I have some different ideas about how I can make it up to you.”
“Yeah?” He nodded. “Well, considering that you passed out after we had sex, I think you should take it easy.”
“You’re no fun.”
“If you’re a good boy, maybe I’ll get out my stethoscope later and we can play naughty doctor.”
“I like the way you think,” he grinned.
“Eat up.”
“Oh, I plan to.”
“The food. God, you have such a dirty mind.”
He shrugged and dug into his eggs. “One look at you and my cock gets hard. I can’t help that you do that to me. If you think about it, it’s really your fault.”
We ate in silence and then Knight put the tray on the nightstand and pulled me closer, snuggling down into the bed. His hand trailed down my back, sliding over my skin and leaving tingles behind.
“What’s your real name?” I asked after it had been quiet for way too long.
“Hudson McGuire.”
“And you don’t have any family?”
“None worth mentioning.”
“What’s that like?”
“Not having family?”
“Yeah. I don’t know what that’s like. I mean, I have a big family that supports me and loves me. I can’t imagine not having that.”
He sighed and continued to run his fingers up and down my back. “In a way it’s nice. You live your life the way you want and no one is there to be disappointed in you or give you grief for your choices. I couldn’t imagine doing what I do if I had a mother that would be worrying about me. The downside is that I don’t have anyone worrying about me. I have no one to see at holidays. I usually spend them getting drunk or working. There’s literally no one in this world that gives a shit about me.”
“What happened to your mother?”
“She died a long time ago. I don’t have a single memory of her. My dad said that she was a great woman and I really hope that I’m not disappointing her, but I guess I never really think about it too much. She’s not here to give a shit, so I live my life the way I want.”
“Where’s your dad?”
“He died right after I went to basic.”
“Do you worry about what he would think?”
“Not really. He was in the military. I like to think that he would be proud of me, but maybe that’s just wishful thinking. The rest of my family are distant relatives that never gave a crap about us anyway.”
“So, you live by your own rules and no one holds you accountable.”
“Pretty much.”
“What about me?”
He pulled away slightly so he could look at me. “Kate, whatever we have is something special, but I told you, I can’t give you more than this. My life isn’t made for settling down and raising a family. You know enough about my history to know that’s not even possible. I can give you this and I can come to you when I’m not working, but it’ll never be more.”
“How do you know? Have you ever tried to have more?”
“What would you have me do? Sit at home and watch the kids all day while you go out and earn the money? I sure as fuck can’t get a regular job. I go by a different name now, but that doesn’t mean that it would stand up to scrutiny. I have to be careful that I don’t get my ass thrown in jail because if someone looks too closely at me, they would know that I’m not Garrick Knight in any way other than name.”
“So, you have to be careful so that you don’t get caught and you can go out and murder more people, but you can’t be careful so that you can try for something with me?”
“Are you telling me you would seriously want that? Say we did it, stayed together and had kids someday. You realize that I could never marry you, right? What would you tell our kids? Would you tell them that I’m a good person they could look up to?” He seemed to be getting angrier by the second and I wondered if he was upset because he knew that he wasn’t a good person or because he was pissed at me for even suggesting it. “What would you say about why we never got married? Would you trust that none of the people from my past would come looking for me and possibly take our kids to get to me? Because even I’m not sure about that.”
Everything he was saying was so overwhelming, but even with all the information being crammed into my brain, I could see the logic in what he was saying. He was absolutely right about all of it. That wasn’t the kind of life I wanted to live, but at the same time, I didn’t want to let him go either, which was strange considering that I barely knew the man and what I did know didn’t paint a pretty picture.
“You’re right. I don’t know why I even brought it up. We barely know each other. We live totally different lives. It would never work anyway.”
He lifted my chin, forcing me to look at him. “We may not have the conventional relationship, but we could have something really fucking good. You just have to decide if that’s what you want.”
It was the same every time he looked at me. His black eyes held me captive and promised pain if I crossed him and immeasurable pleasure if I allowed it.
“So, what exactly would this unconventional relationship look like?”
“Well, I’m grounded for a few weeks while I heal up and then I’ll get back to work. When I have a few days off, I’ll come visit and we’ll spend as much time together as possible while we can. I’m not saying it’ll be perfect, but while I’m here, you’ll have all of me, everything I can give you.”
“And what about when you’re not with me?”
“I’ll be working.”
“But, will there be other women?”
He blew out a harsh breath and looked away from me. “I’m not going to lie to you, there have been times that I’ve used women to get information that I need. I’ve never wanted any of them, though. Th
ey were just sources for me. But I’ll always be honest with you.”
“Are you telling me that you might fuck other women in the future to get the information you need? And I’m supposed to be okay with that?”
“Hey, this is my life. I do what I have to, not only to keep my own ass safe, but to get the job done. If I don’t come through on a job, I end up with my ass on the line. And if these people are willing to pay for someone to be killed, they’re willing to have me killed for not completing a job.”
“I thought you said you were taking out rapists and drug dealers. Those are small time jobs, right? Why would someone pay to have you killed?”
“Those are some of the jobs I do, but I have plenty of jobs that are much bigger and most of them come from people that are just as evil as the ones I’m taking out.”
“Then why do you do it? You’re just taking out the garbage for someone else.”
“It’s one less piece of garbage to pollute the earth. And occasionally, I get to take out the big fish, too. But it takes lots of planning and time, something I don’t always have. Besides, I work alone and the really bad people usually have an army protecting them. It’s not like I can just slip in and take them out. But every time I get closer to these assholes, I make notes and plan for the time that I can get in and take them out.”
“Your world is very complicated.”
“It is. Is that something you can deal with?”
“I need to think about it.”
Knight and I spent the rest of the day lounging around the house. I needed to get out though and have some time to myself, so I ran to the grocery store and picked up some food for the week. I was so confused by everything Garrick had told me, but deep down, I knew this would never work for me. How could I pass up a normal life with a family for someone that would only be around occasionally and couldn’t fully give himself to me? Still, I had him for a few weeks more and I was determined to enjoy what little time I had left until he left me again for some other mission.
✯✯✯✯✯
“What do you think you’re doing?” I asked Garrick as he pulled on a black leather jacket. “Where did you get those clothes?”
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