They managed to snag two seats in the third row and Vanessa expressed her displeasure of not being able to get seats in the front row. Syd thought about teasing Vanessa but thought differently when the crowd hushed and a woman stepped up to the podium and spoke into a microphone.
“Good evening, ladies and a few gentlemen.” That got a few chuckles from the crowd, and Syd looked around to see four or five men in the crowd, probably dragged there by their wives or girlfriends. Syd mentally rolled her eyes at the look of anticipation on the women’s faces, and boredom on the men’s.
“Leah and I would like to thank you for coming out tonight to listen to her read a passage from her latest novel, Open to Love. After the reading, we’ll have time for some questions. And if you’re interested, her other novels will be for sale and she’ll be happy to sign them for you. We request that no pictures be taken and that you turn your phones to silent.”
Every face Syd saw in the crowd was riveted to the woman at the podium.
“Now, without further ado, Leah Griffin.”
The crowd burst into applause with a few whistles thrown in. Leah Griffin stepped from behind a curtain and smiled at the crowd as she approached the microphone.
Syd felt her jaw drop open and her eyes widen as she gasped and grabbed onto Vanessa’s arm, then she muttered under her breath so only Vanessa could hear her. “Holy fucking shit.” The room started to spin and she felt a little disoriented.
Vanessa whipped her head toward Syd and she stared back with trepidation. “What?”
“That’s Abby.”
Syd watched Vanessa’s face fall then she turned back to Leah—Abby—only to see Abby staring back at Syd. Abby looked as shocked as Syd felt as the color seemed to drain from her face.
* * *
Abby stood behind the partition waiting to be announced. She took a quick peek and was pleased to see such a large turnout. She normally didn’t like speaking in front of large crowds, but as Leah Griffin, she became another person, one who was admired by her readers. It was that thought that enabled her to do public readings. She had picked a passage early in the story, one that was sure to grab the reader’s attention, or in this case, the listener’s attention. Hopefully, they would like it enough to want to buy her latest release.
Being in Chicago brought conflicting feelings to Abby. One was that she wanted to call Syd to see if they could get together. Abby thought about her every damned day, and missed her so damned much that her heart truly ached. She had been irritable with her gran, then felt ashamed that she would treat her one remaining family member the way she’d been. But her gran never said anything about her behavior. She seemed to take it in stride, knowing how depressed Abby was.
Abby would wake early, do her chores, ride Bevin and Pokey, and work even harder around the farm in the afternoon. She’d be so tired that she’d had just enough energy to eat dinner before falling into bed for a fitful night’s sleep. It was the only way to keep thoughts of Syd at bay.
On the other hand, she wanted to get in and out of Chicago as quickly as possible to reduce the chances of seeing Syd. The odds of that happening were ridiculously low in a city that big, yet she still didn’t want to take that chance. The thought of accidentally running into Syd made her insides tremble, and not in a good way. Not like they had when she was being intimate with Syd. Besides, what would she say to her? They’d each written a letter and said all there was to say. But there was more to say. She wanted to tell Syd she loved her, that she was in love with her, and she never wanted to live another day without her.
It had been two months since they’d last seen each other, and Abby was sure Syd would’ve moved on by now. Found a lover that lived in this amazing city of culture and nightlife, someone who had more in common with her than the farm girl from Iowa.
The applause roused Abby out of her thoughts, and she quickly regained her focus on why she was there. Those people out there were waiting to see Leah Griffin and hear a passage from her latest book. Normally, after an appearance like this, Abby would go to the happening lesbian nightclub in the area and find some company for the night before flying home the next day. But since having been touched by Syd, the thought of anyone else touching her held little appeal. She would just go back to her hotel room alone, maybe raid the mini bar to help dull the pain of being in Syd’s hometown. So close to her, yet so far. Abby brushed her damp hands along the front of her trousers, took a deep breath, and let it out slowly before stepping out from behind the partition.
Abby stepped up to the podium and smiled as she looked out into the crowd. Mostly women, which she expected, but also a few men. Her gaze froze on the woman who’d invaded every waking thought, the woman with the chocolate brown eyes and a look of shock on her face. Shit. She grabbed the podium to prevent from falling over. On the other hand, if she fell over, she might lose consciousness and would be taken away from this place.
Abby could feel her mouth drop open when she spotted Syd sitting in the third row next to an attractive woman who looked almost as shocked as Syd. Abby had never felt so trapped in her life, but she couldn’t just take her book and leave. All of these people came to hear and meet Leah Griffin. Time to suck it up and give them what they wanted. She cleared her throat and shook the fog from her mind.
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you so much for coming out tonight. I’ll be reading from my latest release, Open to Love. I hope you enjoy it.” Abby opened the book to the marked page and began reading. It was amazing how five minutes could seem like five hours, especially when the love of her life was sitting in the third row, clearly avoiding looking at Abby.
She’d glance over toward Syd and her companion every so often, but Syd was looking down into her lap. She wondered what Syd was thinking of at that very moment. Abby had struggled to pull her attention back to the audience and to her reading, but she somehow managed. She had finished her reading and was greeted by a thunderous applause by everyone. Well, almost everyone.
Syd continued to sit quietly, avoiding looking at Abby. Abby allowed fifteen or twenty minutes of thoughtful questions from the crowd, and she tried to be present and engaged, but in the back of her mind was Syd. That had to be the longest night Abby had ever experienced, and it wasn’t over yet. She still had to sign books, chat with people, and pretend that her world hadn’t just upended. She loved interacting with her fans; it was her favorite part of being a published author. But tonight, she wanted to run—into Syd’s arms or back to Iowa—she couldn’t decide which.
Abby had taken a seat at the table where stacks of her latest novel sat, waiting for the readers to hand them over to sign. When the last person bid her a good night, she reached down to get the bottle of water next to her chair to quench her thirst. When she looked up, Syd was standing in front of her, and her mouth went dry again.
* * *
That had been some of the sweetest torture Syd had ever experienced. It was too hard to look at Abby during her reading so she had closed her eyes and listened to the honey-thick voice speaking the words. The same voice that had talked dirty to her during their throes of passion, had whispered sweetly in Syd’s ear after making love, who soothed her when she had been so upset after reading Virginia’s letters. She had contemplated walking out, but one, she didn’t want to be rude, and two, she didn’t want to risk never seeing Abby again. So she stayed and let the torture continue. When people started lining up to have Abby sign their books, she told Vanessa that she could leave once Abby had signed her book, and she begged Vanessa not to say anything to Abby about her. She was going to grab a coffee and wait until Abby was done. She had to talk to her. Syd missed the slow pace of Iowa, the peacefulness she experienced in the early dawn while feeding the chickens, but she missed Abby more.
She rubbed her chin and bit her bottom lip as she thought of what she would say. Syd felt she laid out all her feelings in the letter she wrote to Abby. Had she even read it? She was hoping, but not expecting her t
o call Syd, but after a month of constantly checking her phone for a message from Abby, she had given up hope. She knew she had to keep the conversation platonic. After all, they had started out becoming friends before it became sexual. Abby was someone Syd wanted in her life, even if it was just as a friend. It might be hard at first, but Syd was hoping it could be done.
“Hello, Leah.” It felt so strange calling her that, but obviously keeping her real identity a secret from her readers was important to her, and she would respect that.
“Hi, Syd.”
“You should have called me to tell me you were coming to town.”
“I know, and I’m sorry. I should’ve called you after I read your letter, but I didn’t know what to say.”
Syd nodded, taking Abby’s words at face value…for now. She stood still and just stared at Abby. Now that she was that close to her, she had no idea of what to say. All she knew was that she might never have that chance again and took a leap. “Do you have plans for dinner?”
“Actually, I was just going to order room service. I have a flight back tomorrow morning.”
“Why don’t you come back to my place and I’ll cook us dinner. I’ve discovered a few recipes since we last saw each other.” Syd forced a smile. Please say yes, Abby. I have so much to say and I just want some more time with you.
“Are you sure? We could just go to a restaurant and let the other people do the work.”
“That would be nice, but considering it’s Saturday night, we would have to wait forever for a table. Really, it won’t be that much work, especially if you help me prep.”
Abby laughed and shook her head. “Sure, I’d love to help.”
Since Vanessa had driven them to the bookstore, Syd hailed a cab which was quicker than taking the train. They arrived at Syd’s building in less than fifteen minutes.
“Good evening, Ms. Carter. Welcome home,” the doorman said as he opened the door.
“Hi, Sam. This is my friend Abby. Abby, this is Sam, one of my most favorite people in Chicago. He wasn’t on duty when you came to Chicago with me.”
“Go on now, Ms. Carter. Ms. Abby,” Sam said as he tipped his hat.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Sam.”
They walked across the marble floor to the elevator, and Syd could feel Abby’s gaze on her.
“What?” Syd couldn’t help return the smile Abby had.
“I love the way you treat people. I’ve never met anyone as respectful as you.”
Syd shrugged. “I just treat people the way I want to be treated.”
They stepped into the elevator and Syd’s skin tingled being in such close proximity to Abby. The electricity between them hadn’t waned. Did Abby feel it too? How was Syd going to keep her hands to herself? All she’d wanted to do since she saw Abby in the bookstore was take her in her arms and kiss her until she came to her senses. Her hand shook and she had trouble getting the key in the lock. This was going to be more sweet torture, Syd was sure, but it was something she was willing to go through in order to spend just a few more hours with Abby.
She flipped on the lights and watched Abby take in her home, like it was the first time she had been there. She glanced at the art that hung on her walls, the coffee table books in front of her sofa, and she stopped in front of the window. Syd stood beside her, wondering what she thought of the view.
“Still breathtaking,” Abby whispered.
Syd looked at Abby’s profile, unable to tear her gaze away. “Yes.”
Abby looked at her, and a wistful smile belied the sadness in her eyes. “I’ve missed you.”
“I was only a call away,” Syd said, borrowing Abby’s signature good-bye.
“It wouldn’t have been enough, Syd. It just would have made me miss you more, and I didn’t think my heart could have taken that again.”
“Wait. You told me you were just having fun, that it was just sex, and you didn’t love me back. Was that a lie?”
Abby returned her attention back to the view of the skyline, and she wiped away a tear. She nodded.
“Abby, let’s go sit down. My legs are suddenly feeling weak.” Syd took Abby’s hand and led her to the couch. “Would you like a glass of wine? Or I have Scotch.”
“Wine, please.”
Syd took her time opening the bottle, which allowed her to consider what Abby had said. So Syd wasn’t wrong when she thought Abby had feelings for her. But why would she lie? Syd took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. She had every intention of finding out. She set the glasses on the coffee table and sat next to Abby.
“Why did you lie to me?”
“I did it so you’d come back here to help the kids. They need you, Syd.”
“So you did it for them?”
“Yes. I saw the excitement in your eyes every time you talked about them and the center you wanted to start for them. You got the grant to start it. How could you have done that if you stayed on the farm?’
“I thought maybe we could try the long-distance thing. I would’ve tried anything to stay together with you.”
“And how long could we have done that? Your life is here. Mine is in Iowa. My gran is getting older and she’s the only family I have left. I can’t leave her.”
Syd took Abby’s hand in hers. “No, of course you can’t. I thought I had all the answers. At least some of them.”
Abby brought Syd’s hand to her mouth and kissed it. “It was a good idea, but it’s just not possible. We would eventually get tired of traveling back and forth, and we’d stop spending so much time together. I felt it was best to end it then while we still had a chance at being friends. I didn’t want there to be any resentment down the road.”
It made sense. Syd didn’t like it, but it made sense. “All right. I understand what you’re saying. I’m going to go get dinner started.” Syd stood and put more distance between them. She put her hands on the counter and hung her head. She wouldn’t cry. She. Would. Not. Cry.
“Syd,” Abby said as she put her hands on Syd’s shoulders. Syd let out a wracking sob and turned to bury her face in Abby’s chest. She felt Abby’s arms engulf her and strengthen the hold. “I’m so sorry, baby. I really am.” Abby’s soothing voice was the same Syd had heard when Abby comforted her, and it gave her the courage to lift her head.
Syd looked into Abby’s eyes, then at her lips. She cradled Abby’s face in her hands and kissed her sweetly. A kiss of apology and understanding. “I know. Me too. I’ve never met anyone like you or felt so much for another woman, and I really wanted to be yours and for you to be mine. But I understand your reasoning. I could never ask you to leave Bernice. Let’s just enjoy our time together tonight. Maybe we could work on being friends again.” She kissed Abby once more before stepping back to put space between them. If she didn’t, she’d never stop kissing her, and she was sure they’d end up in Syd’s bed. “Come on, let’s get you fed.”
They moved in the kitchen like they had back at the farm, when things were easy and light. They sat down to eat, and Syd asked Abby about Bernice, the horses, and how her book tour was going. Syd didn’t want their time to end, but it was getting late and Abby had a flight back home in the morning. She placed their dishes in the sink and grabbed her keys and wallet. “Come on, I’ll take you back to your hotel.”
“You don’t have to do that, Syd. I can catch a cab.”
Syd looked at Abby forlornly. “I want to spend as much time with you as I can. Besides, I want to show you something.”
Ten minutes later, Syd was unlocking the front door to the center she’d been working so hard on. She flipped on the lights and guided Abby in. “This is it.”
Abby was silent as she took in the room, moving around in a slow circle. “Syd, this is fantastic.”
Feeling proud of the work she’d done and what this center was going to do for some of the children of Chicago, she stood tall and felt her chest puff out. “Thanks.”
Abby took Syd’s hand and looked into her eyes.
“I mean it. This place is going to be amazing. When are you opening for business?”
“Grand opening is in three weeks. I got the inside painted this week and some of the furniture put together. I’m still waiting for a few more pieces of furniture and supplies, but I’ve been assured they’ll be delivered next week. My boss, Christina, and I have decided to combine our centers, so the kids I’m working with now will start coming here since it’s a bigger space and it’s newer. Let me give you a tour.” The front room held two couches facing each other with a coffee table in between on one side of the room and the other side held four accent chairs that were arranged for socializing.
They walked down the hall and stopped at every doorway. Syd pointed to the room on the left. “This is going to be where the kids can be tutored, or do their homework. It’s basically a quiet space for the kids to learn.” There was a white board on the wall with different colored markers, and two six-foot long tables and six chairs for each table. There were also three computer stations in the corner. She pointed to the room on the right. “This is the library. This is another quiet zone for the kids to read or study. In these two rooms, their cell phones have to be turned off. If they want to text their friends or play on social media, they need to go out to the front room.
Syd led Abby down the hall. “This is the break room where the kids and staff can keep their food. I’m also considering giving cooking lessons,” Syd said with a smile. There was another table with chairs, a full-sized refrigerator and freezer, a stove, microwave, oven, and sink.
“Across the hall is the staff office and at the end of the hall is the game room.” They passed two bathrooms and entered the game room. This and the staff office were the two rooms that still needed to be furnished. “There’s going to be a foosball table, Ping–Pong table, board games, and cards. Out back, eventually, I want to level the ground and have it paved to put in a basketball court, but we’ll have to see how much we get in donations.”
A Call Away Page 20