Eddie’s Prize

by Maddy Barone

  “We have to keep him separate. He could be infected, and pass it to all of you,” Taye explained gently.

  “But you said that wolves can’t get the Woman Killer Plague. Maybe lions can’t either.”

  Eddie got up and caught the bundle of his clothes Taye tossed at him. “He’s right, Lisa. It’s a small risk, but any risk is too much.” He put his clothes on quickly and stood looking at her with a pained expression. “I hope we’ll be able to talk at least, even if we have to keep some distance between us. There is so much for me to tell you. So much that you deserve to know.”

  “So much that you should have told me months ago.”

  Eddie winced at her sharp tone. “Yes,” he admitted softly. “I don’t blame you for leaving. I was stupid.” He broke off with a quick glance around at their audience. “You’re not wearing a coat, Lisa. Go inside and warm up. When you’re ready to hear me out, come to the stable. Please come. I need to apologize to you.”

  Lisa watched Taye lead Eddie to the back where the stable was. The distance that Taye kept between them might have been merely a precaution to prevent the possible spread of germs, but it made Eddie look so alone. She blinked against tears.

  “Come inside,” said Jay, nudging her toward the den with a hand on her shoulder. “Madison was right about one thing, at least. You’re not wearing a coat.”

  “You must be cold,” Lobo agreed. He had his dog in his arms. He added darkly, “He didn’t have to throw The Beagle aside that way. Her pride is hurt.”

  Lisa allowed them to steer her inside the den. The Beagle whined pitifully against Lobo’s chest. Lisa glanced at the dog, looking for injuries. “I hope nothing else is hurt?”

  “No.” The motorcycle thug crooned at his dog, “You’re gonna be okay, aren’t you, sweetie? You need a nap in front of a warm fire and some petting and fussing.”

  Was Lobo talking to his dog or to her? She felt like she could use some petting and fussing too. She couldn’t completely smother a grin when he made kissy faces at his dog. She wondered if that was why he did it.

  Carla waited, wide-eyed, in the front foyer area. She grabbed Lisa’s arm and dragged her down the hall to her private room. She shoved Lisa down onto the bright couch.

  “Did I see what I thought I saw?” she demanded. “Eddie is some sort of shape shifter?”

  “Um … well, I guess so.” Lisa wrapped her arms around herself. “Eddie is a lion. A mountain lion. That’s the secret he said he couldn’t tell me.” She started to rise. “I have to talk to him.”

  Carla shoved her back down. “It won’t hurt him to wait a day. He’s made you wait over three months to find out something this important. You’re still looking pretty green. How are you feeling?”

  Lisa swallowed. “Overwhelmed. Angry. Sick. Why didn’t he tell me?”

  Tears erupted, clean angry tears that washed away the sick. “He asked his mother if he could tell me, as if he were in kindergarten asking if he could go outside and play. And when she said no, he went along with it. When I asked him about it, he got pissy and wouldn’t talk to me at all.”

  Carla sat next to her and put an arm around her shoulders. “So he’s a bit of a momma’s boy. He’s told you now. Or shown you, which is even better, isn’t it? Now all the Pack knows too.”

  A knock sounded on the door, and Taye came in. He was carrying a tray with sandwiches and coffee for two. He set it down on the table by the stove and peeked at Lisa cautiously—looking as alarmed as a tough Alpha could when he saw the tears on her face.

  “Is she going to be okay?” he asked Carla.

  “Yes,” said Carla firmly. “Eventually.”

  “Madison wants to talk to her, but if she doesn’t want to, Snake says he’ll be happy to bite him.”

  Lisa choked out a laugh and wiped her nose on a handkerchief Carla gave her. “I’ll talk to him in a while. Does he have food too?”

  Taye sighed. “Snake! Get Madison some lunch!” he yelled.

  From the hallway, Lisa could hear Snake grumble. “And don’t bite him!” she called. “I want to hear what he has to say.”

  He said he would apologize, and she wanted to hear it. She deserved to hear it.

  * * * *

  After she was fed and bathed, Lisa put on her coat and hat, picked up the bag her growing afghan was kept in, and went out to the stable. Snake followed her, carrying a chair and a pile of blankets.

  It wasn’t actually freezing in the stable, but it was certainly cold. The wolves didn’t seem to feel the cold. Did Eddie? He was in a stall with a door that was only chest high. Snake set the chair down at what he considered a safe distance from the door. He draped one blanket over the seat and back of the chair to cushion it and fussed while Lisa seated herself. He flapped out another blanket and laid it over her knees, and a third he draped around her shoulders.

  “Are you warm enough?” he asked. “The bricks are still heating. I’ll bring them out in a few minutes.”

  Eddie had come to the stall door and leaned on it, his eyes fixed on Snake with a baleful intensity that made Lisa nervous. She automatically leaned back to put some distance between herself and Snake. Almost immediately, she recognized what she was doing and leaned forward again to deliberately place a hand on Snake’s arm. She wasn’t caving in to Eddie’s jealousy any longer.

  “That sounds good, Snake. Thanks.”

  Snake shot one threatening glance at Eddie and left the stable. Lisa watched Eddie’s eyes shimmer between blue-green and yellow-green as he glared at Snake’s back. She had seen them do that before, and more than once she thought she’d seen his face subtly alter its shape. Those times she had waved it off as shadows or simply a strange expression. Knowing what she did now, she wondered how she had missed the truth. A couple of times she had felt his fingernails scratch her, which really made no sense. His nails were always well-trimmed. Yet the hand-shaped bruise on her arm had tiny round scabs at the end of each finger mark. Claws. Could he change just a little bit? Like his fingernails turning into claws?

  Lisa leaned back in the chair when Eddie’s eyes shifted from the door to her face. He stared at her for long moments, looking slightly alien until the yellow in his eyes faded back to blue. Each of them was silent, as if waiting for the other to begin. Was it stupid to be afraid of hurting his feelings?

  To give herself something to concentrate on besides him, Lisa pulled her granny square out of the bag and began hooking before starting with what she hoped was an easy question.

  “How long have you been a, uh, mountain lion?”

  The stall door creaked when he leaned against it. “I suppose all my life. The first time I changed was on my eighth birthday.”

  Lisa couldn’t help a peek at him. “But nobody knows about it?”

  “Until this morning, the only people who knew were my mother and my sister.”

  The afghan drooped from her hook as she dropped it to stare at Eddie. “What about your dad?”

  “No.” He shook his head. “He doesn’t know.”

  Lisa wrapped the yarn around her fingers again. “How can he not know? You lived with him for twenty-six years. He must have seen your eyes change or your claws pop out.”

  Eddie scrubbed his hands over his face. “That never happened until the last few months. You are the catalyst, Lisa. The cat—I’ve always called it the beast or the monster—has changed since we’ve been married.”

  Lisa swallowed nerves. “Does it … hate me?”

  He laughed roughly. “No. The opposite. He calls you our mate.” He turned away from the door to pace the small area of the stall. “I wish I could explain this better. All my life I’ve controlled it. I’ve pushed it down and shoved it back, and only let it out a couple times a year. He said he was content with that until you. Now he wants us to combine into one person.”

  “Who? Me and you?”

  “No, me and the cat. He thinks we’re not supposed to be two separate beings, but one.”

  Lis
a blinked, her hook slowing. “What does that mean?”

  “Damned if I know.”

  The door of the stable opened, and Snake came in carrying a towel-wrapped bundle. He put it on the floor for Lisa to prop her feet on. The heavenly warmth of the heated brick seeped through her boots. She smiled at him. “Thanks, Snake.”

  Snake stood straight and stared at Eddie. “How can you and your cat be one being? You’re a man and he’s a cat.”

  Eddie growled. “This is a private conversation.”

  Snake was unimpressed. “Lisa is my sister. What concerns her concerns me. Answer the question.”

  Eddie’s hands moved as if he was going to tear at his hair. “I don’t know. Is that how it is for you wolves? Separate?”

  Snake shrugged. “Sure.”

  Eddie paced some more. “I think it’s different for me. The mountain cat thinks we started out as one person, but we split into two because I rejected him.”

  “Like a split personality?” Lisa suggested.

  Both Snake and Eddie looked at Lisa.

  “You know, like Multiple Personality Syndrome. I talked about it before, remember?”

  Eddie looked vague.

  “I’ve never heard of it,” said Snake.

  The only reason Lisa knew about it was because of some research she had done in preparation to audition for a movie role. She drew a breath to explain about how some children who experienced terrible trauma had developed additional personalities to deal with various scenarios, but let it out without saying anything. It was too complicated to try to explain.

  “Well, never mind,” she said instead. “Eddie, do you talk to the mountain cat?”

  Eddie looked faintly embarrassed. “He talks to me in dreams.”

  Snake stuck his thumbs into the waist of his cutoffs. “What do the other mountain cats say?”

  Eddie stopped pacing and glared at Snake. “I’m talking to Lisa.”

  Lisa gave Snake a smile. “You don’t mind giving us some privacy, do you?”

  Snake left reluctantly. When the door had shut behind him, Lisa asked. “What do the other cats say, Eddie?”

  He leaned on the door again. “There aren’t any others. Just me and Mom.”

  Lisa’s crochet hook fell from her slack hand and clattered on the floor. “Your mom is a mountain lion? Darlene?”

  He showed neither amusement nor offense at her incredulity. “Yes. I suppose I should tell you about our family history.” He folded his arms over the top of the door and rested his forehead on one wrist. “About fifty years ago, during the Terrible Times, my grandfather and all his sisters and brothers, and aunts and uncles, and cousins, lived in New Mexico. They were all mountain lions, and they lived in caves in the mountains. Humans found out about them and attacked. Every person was killed except for my grandfather. He was nineteen years old. He was wounded but escaped. He travelled north through Colorado and into western Nebraska. A couple years later, he met my grandmother there.”

  Eddie lifted his head to stare at Lisa. “I don’t know if she was his mate, like the cat thinks you’re my mate, or if he was just tired of running and wanted to settle down. They married, and my mom was born. They had a small ranch west of here. I guess they were happy.”

  Lisa waited for him to go on. After a lengthy pause, he did.

  “My grandmother didn’t know what her husband was. After his entire family was murdered because of what they were, he kept it to himself. But when my mom was around nine years old, she changed into a mountain lion. Her mother was shocked. I suppose she was scared. Or something. She took my mother to her priest at the church. They tried to exorcize the demon from her.” Eddie’s smile was painful to see. “It didn’t work. But they did manage to kill my grandfather when he came looking for his daughter.”

  Lisa swallowed. “How horrible,” she choked.

  “My mother and grandfather had an hour together before they hanged him, and he told her everything he could about himself and his family, but she was just a kid. She didn’t understand very much of what he tried to tell her. My grandmother gave my mother to the church to be raised. Mom doesn’t speak of it much, but I gather it was an unpleasant childhood. To this day, she despises churches and priests. You’ll notice we don’t have any here in Kearney? Dad put them all out when he became mayor.”

  “I guess you can’t blame her,” Lisa whispered.

  “She ran away from them when she was sixteen. She came to Kearney and met my dad, and they were married the next year. She’s never gone back or tried to find her mother. From the moment I changed, she has taught me to hide it. Hide it as if my life, and the lives of my entire family, depended on it. Do you understand?”

  “Yes. “ Lisa’s voice was soft. “I’m sorry.”

  Eddie’s voice gentled. “For what? You didn’t kill my ancestors.”

  “I badgered you to tell me your secret. I was angry you wouldn’t share it with me. Now I understand why you couldn’t.”

  “I should have. Lisa, I understand why my mother feels the way she does, but I should have told her I trust you with my whole heart. You are my heart. I should have told you, even if she didn’t like it.”

  “Poor Darlene,” Lisa whispered. “I can’t imagine what she went through.”

  Eddie knocked on the top of the door to get her attention. “Yes, what happened to her was horrible. But it doesn’t excuse me. Lisa, I’m sorry. Damn this quarantine! I wish I could hold you.”

  “Me too,” she wailed.

  “I’m so sorry for everything.”

  She sniffed inelegantly. “Everything?”

  “Everything,” he said firmly. “The jealousy, not trusting you, the running away for hours at a time … everything. Some of it really can be blamed on the cat. I was hurt by the men you had in your life before me, but I got over that when I saw how hard you were willing to work to be a good wife. The cat, though … he’s not very reasonable. The harder he tried to escape my control, the harder I fought him. I was so desperate to keep him a secret from you. It was easiest to just get away from you and let him loose.”

  “That’s why you would run out like the devil was chasing you.” Lisa hunted for a handkerchief. There wasn’t one. She sniffed. “Are you still fighting with him?”

  “Not so much anymore.” Eddie’s eyes closed, and Lisa wondered if he was searching inside himself. “I think, now that you know the truth, he’ll be happier.” His eyes opened—glazed turquoise bright with tears. “Lisa, I love you. Please come back to me.”

  She drew a deep shuddering breath. “I love you too, but you’ve hurt me badly. I need a little time to think about this.”

  Hurt shadowed his face. “Is it because of the cat? Do you hate me because of it?”

  “No! No, Eddie, that’s not it. Since the day the plane crashed, I haven’t been able to choose for myself what I want. I had no choice about the Bride Fight, or who I would marry. When I make this decision, it will be my decision. Can you understand?”

  “Yes. I really am sorry I’ve been so rotten to you. I know words can’t change anything, but I want you to know that.”

  She gathered up the afghan, put it into the bag, and then folded up the blankets. “Are you warm enough? Shall I leave these blankets for you?”

  His smile was pure sweetness. “Taye gave me plenty of blankets, and if I do get cold, I can always change.”

  “Okay.” She stood looking at him, reluctant to leave him, but knowing she had to. “I suppose I’ll send Snake back out to get the chair.”

  “Or you could leave it here,” Eddie suggested. “Come back again, Lisa. I like talking to you.”

  She nodded. “There are still things we need to talk about.”

  She wished she could kiss him. She lifted a hand in farewell and left the stable to go to her room and think everything through before supper.

  Chapter 26

  She didn’t make it to her room right away. A dozen of the Pack, including Taye, Snake, and Jelly, s
tood in a line between the stable and the den, obviously waiting for her. Lisa slowed as she approached them.

  “Are you going back to him?” Jelly asked, his light brown eyes wide and anxious.

  Taye said sternly, “Jelly, that’s Lisa’s decision to make.” His dimple peeked out. “But are you?”

  Lisa glanced at the stable behind her. Dusk was falling, and the cold air cooled her tear-burned eyes. She wiped her hands over her wet cheeks and lowered her voice. “I think so.”

  Snake growled, and Jelly flared into adolescent fury. “You can’t go back to him! I saw how he treated you at the Gala! And I heard the mean things he said to you there too!”

  Lisa nodded. The story of Darlene’s heartbreaking childhood had given her understanding about why Eddie had refused to tell her his secret, but it didn’t erase all of his actions. “If I go back to him, it won’t be right away. Eddie still has a lot to answer for. I need him to acknowledge his crimes and beg for my forgiveness before I’ll give in.”

  Snake’s scowl dissolved into an admiring grin. “I didn’t know you were so mean.”

  Lisa hitched the afghan project bag higher on her arm. “It’s not mean. I want him to know I won’t overlook his bad behavior anymore.” A surge of satisfaction swept over her. “I deserve to be treated better,” she declared.

  Taye’s straight black brows were pulled low over his eyes. “What exactly did he do and say to you at the Gala?”

  Before she could brush it off, Jelly answered. “He pushed her down, and then he called her a bad name. And he grabbed her arm so hard he left an awful bruise. And he said he wished he didn’t have to endure her for the rest of his life.”

  The old pain flashed back to life in Lisa. “That will be hard to forgive,” she whispered.

  Taye’s face hardened. “Be very sure before you return to him. If he hurts you again, we’ll kill him. If you love him, you’ll take that into account before you decide.”

  He wasn’t joking. All the men here were so kind to her that she sometimes forgot how ruthless they could be. She nodded. “I’ll take that into consideration.”

  Taye grunted, eyes fixed now on the stable with a promise of violence. To prevent him from racing into the stable, Lisa gave an exaggerated shiver. “It’s really getting cold out here.” When that didn’t distract him, she spoke plainly. “I want him to answer to me. You could beat the snot out of him, but that doesn’t settle the matter for me.”