Caden (The Harlow Brothers Book 2)

by Brie Paisley

  Out of breath, I place my hands on my knees. It’s hard to get a handle on myself since I can’t stop laughing. “Did that just really happen?” Caden asks, and all I can do is nod. “Cason sounded mad.” Looking up, Caden is glancing back toward the house as he says, “I don’t think we should go back for a while, small fry.”

  Shaking my head, I suck in a deep breath before answering him. “I think that would be wise. Unless you want Cason to kick your ass.”

  “Psh. He can try,” he starts. He places a hand on his hip as he adds, “I can’t believe that just happened. What are the odds?”

  Finally catching my breath, I stand and walk over to him. Wrapping my arms around his waist, I glance up at him. “It was pretty epic, but please no more running.”

  Caden lets out a chuckle and rubs up and down my arm. “Alright. No more runnin’ it is.” He steps away from me, and I wonder what he’s up to now. “Why don’t we just,” he says and lays down on the road, “relax here?”

  “In the middle of the road? Where we could possibly get run over?”

  Putting his hands behind his head, I can only stare at the fine man below me. He sure is a sight to behold. “No one is goin’ to run over us. Come here, small fry. Lay with me.”

  Letting out a deep sigh, I do as he wants. Resting my head on his now outstretched arm, I place my arm over his stomach. “If we die, I’m seriously going to be pissed at you.”

  Glancing up at him, he grins then says, “I promise we’ll be fine. Just relax and gaze at the stars with me.” Rolling over on my back, I gaze up at the stars. I’ll admit, this is very sweet and romantic even though we’re technically hiding out from Cason. “I used to do this all the time when I was a kid,” Caden says softly.

  “What? Lie in the middle of the road and wait for some lunatic to run you over?”

  “No,” he says with a chuckle. “I meant I would look up at the stars and wait until I could see a shootin’ star, and then I would make a wish.”

  Admiring the stars above us, I quietly ask, “What would you wish for?”

  “Well,” he begins. Letting out a sigh, his arm I’m resting my head on pulls me closer. “I would wish for things little boys always want.” He’s silent for a bit, and I glance at him once more when he says, “When I got a little older, I wished for a love like Carter and Shelby.” Frowning, I start to ask why when he begins to explain. “After what happened with Emily,” he stops, and I hope I never see that woman. I hate the way she played Caden and Cason. “I wasn’t sure if love would ever happen for me. And seeing the way Carter was with Shelby, I don’t know. I wanted what they had.”

  Understanding what he means, I lean up to gaze into those blue eyes of his. “They do have something special don’t they?”

  “They do. It’s funny that I’d forgotten all about my wish.” I feel as if he wants to say more, but instead, he caresses my face. He gazes back at me, and he swallows hard. Feeling he’s about to do or say something I’m not ready for, I lean down and take his lips. He doesn’t seem to mind as he kisses me back, but this kiss feels so much different than our other ones.

  He’s kissing me like he’s in love with me.

  It’s so tender but holds so much passion at the same time. Even if I don’t want to acknowledge what’s going on between us, deep down I can feel it. My heart pounds in my chest with each caress of his tongue against mine, and my stomach dips when he sucks my bottom lip. Looking into his eyes, I feel the last brick around my heart crumble. It falls with the rest of the wall I thought I had placed securely around my fragile heart, and knowing what this means, I have to pull away from him.

  He doesn’t protest as I lay back down beside him, but on the inside, I’m freaking out. I wasn’t looking for love when I came to Mississippi, but apparently, it found me anyway. Trying to get a hold over my emotions, I clench my jaw so the words don’t come tumbling out of my mouth.

  I can’t be in love with him.

  I’m here for one reason only, and that’s to find my birth mother.

  One week later …

  I’ve been trying everything I know to put distance between Caden and I. Since that night we gazed at the stars, I’ve tried so hard to put my feelings aside. But no matter what I do, Caden refuses to give me space. A part of me doesn’t mind that he knows what I’m doing, but that other part is freaking out. Love was never a part of my plans, but no matter what I do, it’s always there threatening to surface. I fear the words are going to break free, and I just don’t know if it’ll be a good thing or not.

  Which is why I’m waiting for Kelsey to be ready to Skype.

  I need my bestie to give me advice. She’s always been the one to give it to me straight, and she’s the only one I trust with this. And it wouldn’t hurt to have an outsider’s opinion.

  Sitting down on the couch, my heart continues to pound in my chest seeing Caden eating a granola bar in the kitchen. I’m not sure if he’s picked up on sudden nervousness again, but it’s so hard to be near him when I know I’m in love with him. He hasn’t brought it up, and neither have I. Jerking my gaze away when I see him walking toward me, I remind myself to chill the fuck out. Just as he reaches me, my phone rings. Seeing Kelsey’s face on my screen, I open the Skype app. “There’s my favorite girl,” she says with a bright smile, and I shake my head.

  “I better be your only girl,” I playfully say. It amazes me how Kelsey can have her black hair piled on top of her head, makeup free, and still look beautiful.

  Her bright green eyes narrow at me as Caden takes a seat beside me. “You know you’re my one and only.”

  “Am I goin’ to have to share now?” Caden asks.

  “Is that the handsome fella you’ve been hiding, Savvy?”

  Rolling my eyes, I face the phone so Kelsey can see him. “You must be Kelsey,” Caden says with a huge grin.

  I can only sit back and watch Kelsey’s eyes widen and of course, a smile forms on her face when she glances back to me. “I totally get why you’ve been hiding him, Savvy. He’s gorgeous.”

  Caden chuckles at my friend’s bold statement, but she’s not wrong. Not by a long shot. “I haven’t been hiding him,” I claim.

  Kelsey shrugs as she says, “Why am I just now meeting the mystery man?”

  Before I get a chance to answer her, Caden leans over and kisses me on the cheek. “I’ve got to go to work, small fry. Be good while I’m gone.”

  Licking my lips, I suck in a breath as I watch him get up. It should be illegal for him to wear his police uniform so well. “I’ll try my best.” Chuckling, I can’t help but watch as he leaves the apartment.

  “Damn, Savvy. You’ve got it bad.”

  Placing a hand on my face, I groan. “I know. I can’t help it.” Lowering my hand, I let out a heavy sigh. “Obviously you’ve seen him. How in the hell am I supposed to resist that?”

  Kelsey frowns and is quiet for a moment before she asks, “Why are you resisting then?” I open my mouth to explain why, but when nothing comes out, she claims, “You have absolutely no reason to hold back. I mean you’re living with the man for Christ’s sake.”

  “I know all this, Kel.”

  “Then what’s the problem? Seriously, Savvy. What’s holding you back? Because I’ve got to tell you, if you don’t want him, I’ll gladly take him.”

  Glaring at my friend, she laughs, and I’m shocked by the instant jealousy that flares in the pit of my stomach. “Hands off. He does have three single brothers though.”

  Kelsey’s eyebrows raise as she asks, “Really? Maybe a trip to Mississippi is in order then.” Wondering if she’s serious, I start to ask before she says, “Maybe someday.” Waving her hand back and forth, she claims, “We got off track. Back to you. You were about to explain exactly why you haven’t told Caden how much you love him.”

  “Is it that obvious?” Shit. If she can tell just by Skyping, then I’m sure Caden knows.

  “Honey, it’s written all over your face. Plus I know you
.”

  Knowing she’s right, I take a deep breath. “I’m in deep shit here.” When Kelsey just blinks at me, I know it’s time to fess up. “I wasn’t expecting to fall in love with him. I didn’t think I could meet someone like him.”

  “That still doesn’t tell me why you’re holding back, Savvy.”

  Leaning back on the couch, I pull my legs up to my chest as I hold the phone so Kelsey can still see me. Gazing off in the distance, I quietly ask, “What if he can’t love me back?”

  “Savannah Lynn Owens,” she says sternly, and I snap my gaze to her. “That boy is so clearly in love with you. I can see it, and if you can’t, then you’re lying to yourself.”

  She does have a point, and I know it. But everything goes back to my insecurities of never being able to receive love because my own birth mother just gave me away. Not to mention, she went to such lengths to keep it hidden. “You could be right.”

  Kelsey lets out a long sigh before saying, “Savvy, just because your mother gave you away does not mean you can’t be loved. Your parents love you more than anything in this world, and I love you like you’re my own sister. You can be loved. You are loved, Savannah.” Blinking back the tears that have suddenly appeared, I suck in a breath as she continues. “I know love can be scary, but you can’t let the fear hold you back. Trust me. Fear rules my life, Savvy. Don’t let it run yours.” Wiping a tear that rolls down my face, she adds, “You need to tell him how you feel. If you don’t and he slips through your fingers, I know you’ll regret it.”

  Sniffing, I let my legs drop, and I sit up straight. “You’re right. I should take the risk and hopefully it doesn’t backfire.”

  “It will not backfire. Now why are you still talking to me? Go get your man, Savvy.” Letting out a laugh, I thank her for once again help me figure my shit out.

  Hanging up the phone, I place it on the coffee table feeling somewhat better about my feelings. I know what I have to do, but even with knowing, I’m still afraid. All that’s left to do is to just tell Caden.

  I will.

  When the time is right.

  It’s funny how everything I’ve ever wanted is within my grasp, but one little thing threatens to rip it away from me.

  It all started an hour into my shift. Caleb called, and I rushed over hoping the news he wanted to tell me was going to be good.

  It wasn’t.

  It was so far from fucking good.

  “You’re sure this is correct?” I ask for the third time.

  “Yes, Caden. I told you this already.”

  My thoughts are spinning with trying to process all this new information. Had I known where this road would lead me, I might have turned the fuck around and changed directions. But now that I’m here and have all the information Savannah has ever wanted, I’m not sure how to go forward. “Can you keep this under wraps?”

  Caleb frowns as he asks, “What are you askin’ me, Caden? You want me to keep this a secret? Because I’ve got to say, I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

  “I know, but this,” I say, waving my hand in front of Caleb’s computer screen. “Isn’t what I was expectin’. This shit will not go down well.” My instincts are screaming for me to protect Savannah at all costs. Even if I have to bury the fuck out of this information, I’m willing to do so if it doesn’t hurt her.

  “I get it, I do, but you have to tell her.”

  Knowing he’s right, I glance away from the computer screen and run my hands down my face. “I know and I will. Just give me some time to figure this out. Can you do that?” As bad as I want to tell him to delete everything, and wipe the fucking evidence away, I know I can’t do that. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to run right to Savannah and tell her. When Caleb nods, I know he’s at least given me some time to figure this shit out.

  Even if I know all this could possibly blow up in my face, I have to at least consider what this means not only for Savannah but for the rest of my family too. And for the first time ever, I’m going to be lying to the ones I love. For the first time, I’ll be the one holding onto a secret that could literally destroy everything I love.

  Three weeks later …

  The one thing I’ve learned about keeping a secret is the guilt makes me do stupid things. Every day that goes by and I don’t tell Savannah that I know who her birth mother is, my guilt intensifies. I want to tell her, but I’ll admit I’m a selfish bastard for holding back. A part of me wants to protect her and keep her away from the fucking train wreck that’s coming. But the other part of me doesn’t want her to know because she won’t have a reason to stay with me anymore. Granted I’ve had multiple opportunities to tell her the truth and come clean, but every time the words start to come out something stops me. The thing is Savannah is so happy, and she’s finally showing me how she feels about me. She hasn’t come out and said it, but she doesn’t have to. I can see it in her eyes, feel it in her sweet caress, and above all, I see it in her actions.

  Which is why I don’t want to fuck what we have all up.

  Every morning I wake up with her by my side and each time I swear this will be the day I tell her. Knowing she’s going to wake soon, I pull her closer to my side and kiss the back of her neck. She mumbles something I don’t catch, and I smile when she begins to rub her ass against me. “Mornin’, small fry.”

  Sleeping beauty rolls over showing me that gorgeous smile, and my heart clenches in my chest knowing there’s a chance I won’t get to see this anymore. It’s just a feeling I have in the pit of my stomach, and with the way she fought so hard against me, I know once the truth is out she’ll take off running. “Good morning,” she says in a raspy voice.

  Pushing all the guilt aside, I brush her hair out of her face. “You still want to go over to Carter and Shelby’s tonight?”

  “Maybe. Ask me later okay?” Caressing her cheek, I savor this moment with her. Why do I feel as if we have an expiration date? Probably because you’re keeping a secret from her. Swallowing hard, I know this is my chance to come clean, but just as I’m about to tell her, she asks, “Everything alright? You’ve been acting strange lately. Well more strange than before.”

  Tell her. “I’m fine. Work is just stressin’ me out.” God more fucking lies. I’m surely going to hell for this.

  Savannah kisses me sweetly then says, “If you want to talk about it I’m always here.”

  “I know. It’s nothin’. Just another day on the force.”

  She sits up in the bed then glances down to me. “You’re off today right?” Once I nod, she gets out of bed and grabs some clothes. “Maybe we could do lunch later?”

  Smiling, I love how she’s always trying to make plans with me now. It’s moments like this I think maybe she will be okay with staying with me, but then again I don’t know for sure. She’s never said, and although she doesn’t bring up leaving as much, I worry she’s still a flight risk. “Of course, small fry. I’ll pick you up at the gym.”

  “It’s a date then.” There goes that bright smile again, and my heart skips a beat. “I’m going to shower before Cason uses all the hot water. Again.” Chuckling as she walks out, I hear her mumble, “He’s worse than any girl I’ve known.” She couldn’t be farther from the truth. I have no clue what my twin does while in the bathroom, but if you let him, he’ll stay in there for hours. I don’t even want to think about the nasty things he does in there. Just … ew.

  Jumping out of bed, I put on a T-shirt and a pair of boxers. Once dressed I glance at the bathroom door knowing I don’t have long to talk to Cason. I haven’t really seen much of him since I learned the truth about Savannah’s mom, and he’s working a lot with adding new training equipment and a lap pool at his gym. Thankfully I find him in the kitchen. His eyes lock with mine, and he immediately sets his coffee mug down on the counter. “What did you do?” he asks, and I take a deep breath.

  I’m not surprised at all by his question. Being his twin, he picks up on things more than any of my brothers. “I
didn’t do anythin’,” I claim which is the truth and part of the problem.

  “You’re hidin’ somethin’.”

  Crossing my arms, I hate this part of our bond. It would be nice to just say what I want first without all the accusations. “What makes you say that?”

  Cason gives me a blank stare as he says, “I know you. What is it?”

  “Alright, alright.” Leaning against the counter, I glance back toward the bathroom just to make sure Savannah is still in there. “I found out who Savannah’s birth mother is—”

  “And you haven’t told her yet?”

  “Well if you would give me a minute to finish I would’ve told you that. Rude much?” Cason lets out a loud sigh, and I shake my head. “Anyway as I was saying’, no I haven’t told her.” With Cason’s hard stare, I quickly add, “But I’m goin’ to. I just … I don’t know how. This is big, Cas. Like life changin’ big.”

  “You’re point is what exactly? She still has a right to know.”

  “I know. Believe me I know, and I feel like an asshole for keepin’ it from her.” Cason frowns and is quiet for a while. He just stares at me and I won’t lie, it’s starting to get a bit awkward. “Are you just goin’ to stare at me all day or give me some advice?”

  “My advice,” he begins as he picks up his coffee mug. “Tell her.”

  “Tell me what?” Jerking my head to the right, Savannah is walking toward us.

  My heart races knowing this is the perfect time to tell her, but instead I chicken out. “Oh just that you’re the most amazin’ woman on this Earth.” Cason smacks my arm, and I jump away from him. Giving him a pointed look, I opt for distraction. Grabbing Savannah by her hips, I pull her to me and give her a kiss.

  “What was that for,” she asks, and I smirk hearing the intake of her breath.

  “Just kissin’ my favorite girl.”

  She frowns up at me, and I swallow hoping she doesn’t bring up what Cason said again. I’m not ready to tell her what I know, and as bad as it makes me seem, I want to hold off as long as I can. “Are you sure you’re alright?”