Endless Heart: Heart, Book 3

by Emma Lang

  A woman’s voice sounded from the left. “What happened?”

  “You don’t want to know.” The man kept half-dragging him down the street. Shane’s feet hardly touched the ground.

  “Oh my God. Has he been drinking?”

  Lettie’s voice cut through his whiskey haze like a sharp razor. Shane’s head snapped up, and he spotted her wearing a blue dress the color of the sky, her brown gaze locked on him. At that moment, he wanted to hate her. He wanted to hate her so she couldn’t ever hurt him again.

  But he didn’t and he couldn’t. He wasn’t strong enough, man enough for her. He tried to tell her to leave him in the puddle, but his words got tangled up. She came around to his other side and put her strong arm around his waist.

  “I’m so sorry, Shane. So very sorry.” Her voice was full of tears, regret and guilt. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

  “Not good enough” was what came out of his mouth. She stiffened, and he heard a little noise as though he’d kicked a kitten.

  “I know I’m not, but that don’t mean I don’t love you.”

  “Noooo, not you. Me. I can’t, shit, um.” Dizziness swept over him, and sparks of light shot across his vision.

  “We need to go to the house. Sam, I think your mother has had a hand in this. They’ve had identical dream memories of each other.” The other woman sounded like she was in charge. “And Sparrow visited Lettie.”

  “What? When?” The man looked at Lettie. “Did she leave you a feather?”

  Feather? How did they know about the feather?

  “I don’t know what it means, but I’m hoping it’s good. There’s been lots of sparrows lately.” Lettie pressed her head against his. “It’s not going to make him hate me any less.”

  “Have faith in the spirits, Lettie. They guided you here. They guided him here. You were meant to be together. We need to listen to them and find your path.” The man was talking and the words should have made Shane’s head hurt, but they didn’t. They were clear as the night sky in summer. Something did bring him here, but he didn’t know why. Was it for Lettie? Or was it for him? He fumbled with his pocket, elbowing the man unintentionally.

  “What is he doing?” the blonde woman asked.

  “I don’t know. Fishing for something in his pocket.” The man steadied him, and Shane was able to grasp what he was after. When he pulled out a sparrow feather, a few gasps sounded.

  “Holy shit.” Lettie was never a woman to shy away from cussing. “He has a feather too.”

  Shane could see the blonde woman smiling widely. “Oh, Sam, the spirits talked to both of them. Sparrow did bring them together. We need to help them.”

  “Let’s go to the lake. The spirits are strongest there. Perhaps they will speak to them.” The man, yes his name was Sam, nodded at Lettie on the right, then headed down the road at a brisk pace. Good thing Lettie had long legs to keep up.

  Memories crowded his mind of those beautiful long legs wrapped around his hips, creamy skin in the water, softer than any flower. “Your legs are beautiful.”

  Sam snorted. “I don’t think he’s talking to me.”

  The blonde walked in front of them, throwing worried glances back every few seconds. “We’re almost there.”

  “What are we going to do when we get there?” Lettie was breathing hard, and it was because of him. She half-carried his sorry carcass.

  “We’re going to let the spirits guide you.” Sam wasn’t making much sense.

  “But why the lake?” Lettie was persistent, and it made Shane grin. “What’s special about it?”

  “It’s a spiritual place where nature and the spirits come together, where things are clearer. The spirits surround it, keep it safe. I’m hoping it will clean his head from the whiskey too.” Sam grunted as they started walking up a small hill to the crest of the lake. “Angeline, can you bring coffee for Shane?”

  Angeline, the blonde woman’s name. She was Lettie’s best friend and knew all her secrets. No, not all. Lettie had kept her real name to herself. That bitter truth poked him in the heart again.

  “Yes, of course.” Footsteps sounded in the leaves as presumably she went to retrieve the coffee.

  Shane didn’t want any. That would make the pain come back, take away the lovely haze he floated in. There were reasons he drank, and escaping was only one of them.

  “Let’s go to the grassy spot by the shore.” Sam guided them down, the uneven ground making their progress slow.

  “Sam, I still don’t understand what I’m supposed to do.” Lettie sounded desperate, exactly how he’d felt thirty minutes ago. She should have some whiskey too.

  “Just let the spirits guide you, Lettie. They will show you the right path. I’ve found much of my own happiness here, and this is where I brought Angeline the first time we stepped out together.” Sam stopped, breathing hard. “I see sparrows here all the time too. My mother is always around, keeping watch. She chose you two to help. Now you have to accept the help.”

  Sam and Lettie laid Shane down gently. He found himself lying on a soft bed of grass looking up at the puffy white clouds in the blue sky. It was almost the same color as Lettie’s dress. She knelt beside him, her thick braid swaying dangerously close to his eye. She frowned, her brown eyes so full of pain he had to look away.

  No, no, no. He didn’t want to know he’d hurt her although he already knew he had.

  “Shane. Look at me.”

  No, no, no.

  “I’m sorry. I should have told you. I was afraid of losing you before I really had you.” She took his hand in hers. He didn’t pull away but he should have. It felt so good to touch her. That simple contact infused him with calm.

  “Lied,” came out of his mouth.

  “I know. I lied. I love you, Shane. I ain’t never loved anyone like this. I was scared.” She squeezed his hand, and he realized hers were shaking. “Please don’t hate me.” Her voice had dropped to a raw whisper.

  Sam had disappeared, leaving the two of them alone. A breeze picked up, and the sound of dry leaves dancing echoed across the water. The small hairs on his body stood at attention. His mind was suddenly clear as a bell. He pushed himself into a sitting position. Lettie knelt beside him, looking miserable and frightened.

  “What’s happening?”

  She shook her head. “I don’t know.”

  The breeze turned cold, then warm, winding its way around them. A hummingbird stopped directly in front of them, the hum from its wings sounding almost like a bee. It cocked its head and approached Lettie.

  Her eyes widened as the bird seemed to examine her, then it flew close to him. As he stared at the beautiful green and yellow bird, it was as though it was studying him. In an instant, the bird flew away. Shane clutched the sparrow feather in his hand, his heart pounding hard enough to push the whiskey out of his pores in a rush.

  Shane heard humming or chanting, low and distant. He looked at Lettie. “Do you hear that?”

  “Someone’s singing.”

  He glanced around at the empty lakeshore. “Who?”

  “I don’t know.”

  He studied Lettie kneeling beside him. The sight of her in the blue dress stole his breath. She looked just as he had imagined her, in the exact color to make his brown angel turn into a stunning vision. Her face was blotchy with tear stains, and her hair had escaped some of the thick braid. The wisps danced on her cheeks in the breeze.

  Shane couldn’t have explained it to anyone who asked, but he was no longer drunk, not even a little. Goose bumps danced across his skin as he stared at her. The chanting grew louder, his bones vibrating with each note.

  He reached out and cupped her cheek. How could he have ever thought she was a wicked brown demon? Or a plain woman? She was exquisite, more beautiful than nature’s bounty around him. Her heart was pure, and it beat for him as his beat for her.

  “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about my real name.”

  “Your real name is Lettie.”
r />   She shook her head. “I would like it to be—”

  “Then it is.” Shane was crystal clear on what he needed to do. More clear than he’d ever been in his life. “We can leave behind who we were and be who we are.”

  She frowned, looking confused. “What do you mean?”

  He put his hands on her shoulders and stared into her beloved brown eyes. “Sam was right about one thing. This lake cleared my head. I know now what I need. I love you. You love me. Who we were before a month ago, those people are dead and gone. I forgot that for a while because I was scared too.”

  Her frown disappeared, and hope blossomed in her expression. “You were scared?”

  Shane managed a smile. “Of course I was. Once we’re married, I have to be a husband, a man. I ain’t got a good history for either one of those. But I think we are like that bird, free to choose. I choose you. I choose Lettie.”

  Her smile was like the most beautiful sunrise he’d ever witnessed. “And I choose you. I choose Shane.”

  She threw herself into his arms. Shane hung on to her, her body melding with his into one being. The wind wrapped around them, the chanting grew louder still, vibrating through them, in them.

  As they embraced, it was as though the spirits erased their sins, bathed them in forgiveness, and they were reborn. Their lives could begin again, together, without the burdens they had borne for so long.

  The wind and the chanting stopped in a blink. They sat back and stared at each other for a moment. She looked as amazed as he was sure he did. His heart thumped steadily, full of hope for what lay ahead.

  “Marry me, Lettie.”

  Her smile made his heart skip a beat. “I can’t think of anything I want more.”

  This time when they kissed, it was soft, sweet and pure. A new beginning.

  Chapter Nine

  “You may kiss the bride.” Will Barker, the young preacher who had settled in town less than a year ago, smiled at Shane. The minister’s eyes sparkled as Lettie’s new husband leaned in to kiss her.

  His lips were soft and dry, the kiss barely a peck, but neither one of them wanted to put on a show for the folks attending the wedding. A whoop sounded from Sam and Sheriff Booth as the small group closed in for congratulations.

  The men smacked Shane on the back while the women congratulated Lettie. It was a dream, one she hoped she never woke up from. Each of them had overcome the past that hung on their backs like anchors.

  Lettie was almost full to bursting with pure joy. It radiated out from her heart through her entire body. She was nearly glowing like a star in the sky, shining bright. Shane’s gaze fell on her as she was hugged for the fourth time by a weeping Marta. He waggled his eyebrows, and Lettie giggled.

  She stopped and stared at him open-mouthed. She had never giggled in her life. Truthfully, she didn’t know she could. Shane winked, and she giggled a second time. He pulled away from the men and hugged her hard. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he swept her off her feet, twirling her in a circle.

  Everyone laughed and clapped while he spun her in another circle. Lettie could feel the happiness in the air—it was almost visible. When he twirled her around for a third time, she pinched him.

  “If you make me puke on you, I might not ever forgive you.”

  He buried his nose in her neck and laughed. “You’ll never let me forget that I’m sure.”

  “No I’ll tuck it away and use it when I need it.” She laughed in his ear, earning a growl.

  After another round of congratulations, the Gundersons served a feast for the small wedding party. It was a traditional German meal that looked delicious, but Lettie was too excited to eat much except for the strudel. That hit her sweet tooth but made her jitters worse.

  Not only had she gotten married again, but she had another wedding night to get through. This one would be a pleasurable experience, unlike the first one. She pushed aside all thoughts of the nightmare that was her first lifetime. She was Lettie Murphy, for now and for always. The other woman she’d been no longer existed.

  Their love and the magic of the lake had healed both of them, or perhaps it had been the sparrows.

  While Shane chatted with the sheriff, Alice approached Lettie, a tentative smile on her face. For the first time since she’d met the young woman, Lettie smiled back.

  “Congratulations.” Alice gave Lettie’s hand a small squeeze.

  “Thank you, Alice.”

  Alice glanced down at her feet. “I don’t know how to apologize for what happened with Buster. I didn’t—”

  Lettie cut her off. “You don’t need to apologize. He is a son of a bitch who hurt both of us.”

  Alice shook her head. “He hurt you more. He tried to kill you and take everyone’s money. All because I wasn’t strong enough to fight him or keep my mouth shut.” Misery laced her words.

  Surprising herself, Lettie pulled Alice into a quick hug. “Like I said, he was a son of a bitch. What he did is his fault alone.”

  “You forgive me?” Alice looked impossibly young and hopeful.

  “There’s nothing to forgive, girl.” Lettie gestured to the guests. “Now why don’t you go get some vittles and enjoy the party?”

  Alice smiled again, this time with genuine happiness. “I’m glad you found a man to love. Someday I hope to find my own.”

  With that, Alice turned away, leaving Lettie to wonder if the young woman would ever find what she sought. Not if she took to spending time with bastards like Buster and his cohorts. Maybe her friends could help that along.

  Sam and Angeline appeared in front of her, big smiles on their faces and a paper-wrapped box in their hands. “We have a wedding present for you.” Angeline handed the box to Lettie.

  “We need Shane here too.” Sam winked at his wife. “I’ll be right back.”

  “What is it?” Lettie shook the small box, but it didn’t reveal any secrets. She’d never received a gift before and found the anticipation was horrible. “Can I open it?”

  “No, wait for Shane and Sam.” Angeline laughed. “You’ll like it, I promise.”

  Lettie didn’t want to wait. She turned to the left and tried to untie the string without Angeline’s notice.

  “Now, now, don’t cheat.” Angeline tried to take the gift, but Lettie pulled it away. “Be patient, Mrs. Murphy.”

  Mrs. Murphy.

  “That’s the first time anyone’s called me that.” Lettie met her friend’s gaze, her throat tight with emotion. “It’s the first time I’m happy to be who I am.”

  Angeline pulled her into a tight hug, and Lettie was glad to return the embrace. Another first for her. Physical affection hadn’t been enjoyable or wanted. Now things were different. She was different.

  “Oh my.” Angeline pulled back. “That had to be the longest hug we’ve ever shared.”

  Lettie took her friend’s hands and squeezed. Angeline had been the one constant in her life since she had married Josiah Brown. Impossible they’d escaped after a mere two months, yet were closer than most siblings. They survived the worst and emerged on the other side of darkness together. Angeline was the best friend anyone could ever want. “Thank you for not giving up on me.”

  “I would never do that.” Angeline cocked her head to the left. “You are, and always will be, my friend. I love you, Lettie, no matter what.”

  Lettie nodded, too overcome with emotion to respond in kind. She hoped one day she could tell her friend how much she meant to her, but Angeline understood. She always had. Life had stopped kicking Lettie and gifted her with all she could ever want.

  “Now give me that gift back before you open it,” Angeline teased.

  “I’ll think about it.”

  They both laughed, lost in the friendship that had defined them as women. The men returned and found them nearly in tears from laughing so hard. Happiness had come to stay, and Lettie reveled in the experience. Never again would she live in the darkness.

  “Now you can open it.” Ang
eline pointed to the box. “We hope you like it.”

  Shane raised his brows and watched Lettie as she untied the twine with trembling fingers. When she finally got the box open, a folded piece of paper and a key were inside.

  Lettie frowned at her friends. “What is it?”

  “Read it.”

  Shane took the paper and unfolded it. “It’s a deed.” His eyes widened as he looked at Lettie. “It’s a deed to a house in both our names.”

  “House? What house?” Lettie held the key in her hand and wondered why it looked familiar.

  “Your house, silly goose. The house you’ve been living in.” Angeline looked as though she’d burst from grinning. “Both of us decided you deserved a home, and what better place than the house that brought Sparrow into your lives, and to each other.”

  Lettie was speechless. She thought she’d been emotional before, but this was too much. Shane watched her, waiting for her to respond. He respected her, which was a unique experience but one she could get used to.

  “I-I don’t know what to say.”

  Shane grinned. “Say thank you.”

  “It’s too much. I can’t take your house.” Lettie couldn’t imagine giving anyone a house as a gift.

  “It’s not our house. We have a house down by the lake. That was my father’s house. I know he and my mother would love for you to live there, raise your children, be happy and enjoy every moment as much as they did.” Sam folded the key into her palm. “Please take it.”

  She met Shane’s gaze and saw the absolute love there. Life had given her so much already, and now it had given her a home of her own to share with the man she loved, her husband.

  Lettie turned back to Sam and Angeline. “Thank you.”

  They both grinned and went back to the food, hand in hand. Lettie stood there, trembling and overwhelmed with the bounty she now had. Shane wrapped his arms around her and held her tight, his heart beating against hers in a steady rhythm.

  “I love you, Shane Murphy.”

  He sighed softly. “And I love you, Lettie Murphy.”

  She closed her eyes and breathed in his familiar scent. The brown bird had transformed into a hummingbird, flying free into the blue sky of life, her mate at her side. Love had saved them, love would embrace them, love would be the foundation for their home and if they were truly blessed, cradle their children.