Star Woman in Love

by Piera Sarasini

  St. Germain and Lady Portia were concerned. They had been hoping that the Twin Flame Game would by then have played a more central role in the way humans were going to change. That was only going to happen if Cassandra’s development was to unfold hand in hand with her relationship with Oscar. If not, this might create an enduring tear in the Plan. The elements of darkness and doubt had already sneaked in. Now things had taken a complete turn for the worst between the two ex-lovers. The ascended couple didn’t like the fact that Cassandra may end up being alone in her evolution. That would mean that individuals on Earth were going to develop one-by-one, and not two-by-two, like the creatures boarding Noah’s Ark. It could also be dangerous for the planet.

  The healing of the Twin Flame relationship had broader implications. It stood for an old wound in the heart of humankind: the way men treated women historically. Oscar was a symbol of the evolution of the male of his species. Would they embrace the Divine Feminine, womankind in the full scope of her powers? It didn’t seem to be the case. Oscar had opted for the old ways: he had chosen to be with a weaker, less evolved woman. The Masters had therefore devised a stratagem to counteract the tricks of the Dark Side that had tied Oscar and Cassandra to their egos.

  Portia addressed the Lodge.

  “Being Twin Flames ourselves, St. Germain and I understand and embody the meaning of mirroring one another in a perfect relationship. Cassandra and Oscar are Twin Flames too. They have showed each other everything about themselves that needed to be healed. Their mutual mirroring will continue even after their separation, whether they like it or not and whether they acknowledge it or dismiss it as nonsense.”

  Myriam, the Butterfly Lady, took to the floor.

  “Up until Oscar’s betrayal and rejection, Cassandra was sure about her psychological make-up and could control her energy quite effortlessly. We had nothing but praise for her poise. By contrast, Oscar was tormented and sad. Just like many people who are running away from the wound they carry in their hearts, he has developed the habit of subconsciously projecting onto others the deeply ingrained mechanisms and blocks buried somewhere in his psyche. Despite the fact that his encounter with his Twin Flame has brought his wound to the surface, these inner blocks still remain a part of his energy. In his desperate attempt to let them go, he has rid himself of the mirror that reflected them. But his problems are still in him. We know he didn’t reveal the entire wound to Cassandra, and he’s still keeping the darkest part to himself. The wound and his blocks are going to continue to be reflected between the Twins, and will repel Cassandra and Oscar to go their separate ways again until he finds the courage to look inwards and heal on his own.”

  “You are right, Myriam,” Portia said. “Separation often seems to happen to Twin Flames. They find each other only to run away from each after a little while. That’s because there are parts of themselves they are not loving or accepting, and they can’t handle seeing these being magnified by the connection. They don’t feel good enough, as in Oscar’s case. They are afraid that if they get close, the other Twin will see those parts they are trying to deny. They fear rejection would crush them and ‘prove’ to them that the very things they detest about themselves are indeed true.”

  The World Teacher, Master Kuthumi, a specialist in understanding the ways of the flesh, had more to say about this particularly human weakness.

  “At the start, attraction prevailed between Oscar and Cassandra. They are two healthy young people and their physical selves came to the fore, where they stood for quite a while. They were inseparable at the start. Their minds almost couldn’t see the physical boundaries between each other. While their focus was kept on love, it inspired them to grow together into their best selves. This growth caused Cassandra’s evolution to step up a gear. It hadn’t happened with her previous romantic liaisons because they were not of the Twin Flame type. With Oscar it was different. As soon as they met, the cells of her fourth dimensional body started to form and her powers began manifesting. This coincided with the emergence of hurtful memories from Oscar’s past as his mind expanded to embrace the fullness of his own identity.

  Cassandra’s mind is predominantly stellar with a transient human body, and Oscar’s is more human with a very male human body. As cowards do, he blamed her for the troubles of his past. He resented her because he thought she couldn’t understand his torments. The truth is that subconsciously he wanted her to also suffer in order for her to be at one with him at that level. When he abandoned her, their separation created wounds in her that she had never thought she would be capable of suffering. Obviously they lied dormant in some forgotten corner of her mind. She had also been hurt in the past. Wasn’t she abandoned by her father when she was a little girl? And didn’t her mother kill herself in the throes of depression, and leave her behind when she still needed her? And what about Gordon who impregnated someone else whilst dating Cassandra?

  She thought she had dealt with all of this, but her subconscious had made a different assessment of the situation. Her wound is now fully blown up because of the heed she gives it. Unfortunately, her subconscious mind is now clinging to the human cells in her body, which maintain and keep reproducing the memory of these hurts. Now both Oscar and Cassandra have to deal with their own wounds. In actual fact, at present they are far from handling them. She is enslaved by hers and far from even considering healing them. He is running away from his, and subconsciously projecting them on others. Twin Flames always seem to do this, as St Germain and Portia can testify.”

  St. Germain proceeded to speak to the Council.

  “The separation of Twin Flames tends to be sudden and far from amicable. The Twins point their fingers at each other, blaming their partner for the breakdown of their physical relationship. This has all been pre-determined by both Twin Flames along with their Spirit Guides and Soul Family before they incarnate, to help them learn and grow the most. The physical separation forces the Twin Flames to look deeper and awaken more of their soul-consciousness. It takes time for Twin Flames to trust in the love of their Union. Their relationships tend to come about at once and are very intense. They elude the logic in which individuals are taught to trust. Many Twins feel a transformation happening within, even if they tend to try to fight it because they are afraid of the unknown.

  Humans have a tendency to content themselves with how they have made sense of the world, especially as it fits into most other people’s views. Evolution into their angelic selves is taking time to kick-start on Earth. It’s because people are afraid of anything that cannot be labelled, and accepted as the status quo. Humans are not quite sure how they could survive if they allowed themselves to trust in intuition, follow the inclines of their soul and take a spiritual stance to life. Won’t people think they are mad? Won’t they lose friends and even family? What if they are married, won’t their spouses think they are crazy or bad?

  This is one of the reasons why people on Earth feel alone even when they are in relationships. They are confused and think they are mad. They shy from everything and especially everyone who reminds them of their wholeness, of their true potential. They settle for mediocrity and second best, so not to have to face up to the process of embracing their full identity. They run away from their Twin Soul to avoid that hard work, to save themselves the trouble.

  The problem is that as they run from the connection, away from their Twin Flame, they begin to lose themselves. They close their hearts and become numb, depressed, lost. On the surface, they try to pretend that everything is fine. The truth is that their efforts to make everything seem “normal” again are based on fear. They are too weak to believe in this, especially when they think it was their Twin who hurt them so much. This is Oscar’s case. He cannot yet see that it is his own inner hurt, his own inner rejection that has caused so much pain. His inner numbness has become very frightening, and his depression real. He chooses to push it to a forgotten corner of his mind. Chances are that it will grow deep, monstrous roots there. P
eople could see that Oscar was changing but he couldn’t tell them why; he believed no one would understand.

  Oscar’s Twin Flame relationship with Cassandra stepped up a gear as she was turning into a higher being. Concurrently, he began to feel more and more alone and being pushed deeper into himself, into his darkest emotions. He reached that part of his psyche where his intuition is, and where the inner knowing of the soul-consciousness resides, where his best-kept darkest secret resides. In the end, his fear of losing himself outdid his fear of facing up to his inner issues.

  Now we don’t know what is in store for our two Twins. Sometimes Twin Flames need to feel the deepest depths before they accept there is another way into love, into freedom, into happiness. The Path leading there can be very rocky; yet its purpose is to help them to trust in themselves more, and to practice Self-Love. If both Twins find such love at the centre of their soul, it will be reflected back between them, and Reunion will occur. We just hope this is the case for Cassandra and her Twin Soul...”

  “Cassandra has no Twin Soul!”

  A startling roar came from a disembodied voice. Ice-cold silence descended on the Masters. Who was the uninvited guest who had infiltrated their meeting? In synch, they turned to look at the point from where the sound was coming, astounded at what was happening. For the first time an intruder was among them. Who was this being? How could he have the power to project his voice into their gathering? His energy was mighty and angry. A bright ball of Light appeared in a far end of the hall. A figure could be seen inside it. Its contours kept fading and changing. All mouths were ajar.

  The shape spoke again to what looked like a petrified audience. This time his voice was sweeter and golden. “Do you remember me?”

  A lizard appeared on the table and turned into the most handsome man the world had ever seen. His wavy locks skimmed his chin and his eyes sparkled like gold in the mid-summer sun. He towered over the other male Masters by a few inches. They knew him. How could he make it here? How could he penetrate the crystal curtain that surrounded Shambhala? Had the Plan been tampered with to such an extent that portents of this scope could happen?

  The long silence continued. The Masters’ faces seemed grave and concerned. Events that had appeared rather unexplainable before were now making sense. They had to be flexible, given these new circumstances. Lady Myriam was the only one in attendance who couldn’t hide her happiness at the sight of this unexpected visitor. He didn’t look at her but she felt their still strong bond.

  Sanat Kumara’s voice shattered the silence in the Hall. “Master Lucifer, you’re unforgettable. Of course we recognise you. What takes you here? I don’t need to point out that your visit to Shambhala is a clear infringement of the Rules of the Plan. This is a strike under the belt. I demand an explanation.”

  “Sanat Kumara,” Lucifer said, “we all know that the Plan is just a canvas. We can paint what we like on it. Some of us obviously have more imagination than others. As for what I am doing here, I am here to lay my claim on what is mine. I am tired of your attempts at transforming my beautiful creation into something ethereal and intangible. I like contrast, I like drama. We all do on Earth. We thrive on war, famine, poverty, materialism. The ego has never had a better time in the third dimension. Well, perhaps the Middle Ages were as good... anyway, my message is short and to the point: Cassandra has no Twin Flame, and I will show you!”

  His body fizzled out like fireworks and the smell of sulphur was all that was left where the fearsome intruder had been standing. Perhaps this recent episode meant that something dreadful could now take place. The Dark Side had filtered into Shambhala. The tear in the Plan was wider and made them more vulnerable than the Masters had accounted for. The Counterplan was stronger than they had foreseen. Their enemy was angry and vengeful. He could count on many allies on the third-dimensional Earth. Cassandra was wounded and required extra protection against the Prince of Darkness. She’d never been any more third-dimensional than in the last year. Oscar had apparently already been lost to the Dark Side. What was going to happen next? Was Shambhala under threat?

  “Lords and Ladies,” Sanat Kumara addressed the Council with a grin on his face. “Well done, my friends. We managed to convince him we were actually scared and surprised. I almost chuckled looking at your poker faces.”

  All the participants broke into loud belly laughter.

  “I now invite you,” the Sanat said, “to re-focus the flames in your hearts and raise the frequency that we had to lower to allow Lucifer to appear amongst us. The poor soul really thought he had us eating from the palm of his hand. As if we were like the human beings he controls like puppets with his treacherous strings! We know full well that everything the ego comes up with is an illusion. Let’s appreciate the humour in that: Lucifer thinking that he can conquer Shambhala. That’s the ultimate joke, isn’t it?”

  As the vibrations in the Hall rose to their habitual level, the Masters looked happy and satisfied. Lady Myriam was startled by the experience. After all, Lucifer was her Twin Flame. They had to keep away from each other for so long he had obviously forgotten her. Perhaps the future would bring them together again. If only she could make him change that stubborn mind of his. For now, however, she was content that while he was briefly in her presence she had managed to reactivate some of the symbols in his aura that he had switched off. Only Twin Flames can do that to each other, and only if it’s for the other’s highest good.

  * * * *

  Dublin, spring 1999, part 2

  With Matt away on tour and my stubbornness stopping me from following him, I found myself alone in Dublin again. No one was left with whom I could tell my sorrowful tale of the abandoned lover. I myself was starting to feel bored with the account of my loss. I resolved to focus my mind on healing my heartache and regain the powers I once had. That moment of clarity came overnight. A dream announced that I was going to see you again very soon. This time I would be prepared. I would keep my frequency high, concentrate my thoughts on memories of our best time together, on the sweet words you used to whisper in my ears when we made love. That would make me invincible. I just had to make sure that my mind wouldn’t falter even once.

  I left my penthouse and followed my feet to St. Stephen’s Green where I sat on my favourite bench by the pond. Ducks glided on the water and children fed them big chunks of bread. I worried that the poor birds might choke. The scenery was beautiful anyway, so I deflected my mind to my habitual secret pursuit of thinking about you. This time I wouldn’t cry. But despite my efforts to focus on positivity, my subconscious was the keeper of dark secrets, the worst of which was about to manifest in the park.

  The sudden sight of you caught my eye. You were on the bridge gazing at the water. A familiar female shape was at your side, almost glued to you. She was big. Was it Marina? It wasn’t. This woman was quite a bit younger. And she looked pregnant. You bent to kiss her like you had so often kissed me. You were together. My heart died in that second.

  I lost the plot that day. I cursed you. My ego took over my journey. I had become a passenger on a senseless route, just like in Rimbaud’s drunken boat. Rage blasted my purpose. I couldn’t care less about my powers, about the Plan, about my existence. All I wanted now was revenge. You had to suffer. You had to feel humiliated the way you had made me feel. First you’d cheated on me with the ugly fat woman. Then I miscarried your child. And lo and behold! Now you were turning up with a pregnant woman at your side. I ran quick maths in my brain. You must have replaced me immediately, unless of course you had impregnated her while you were still with me. Your adding of insult to injury was gratuitous. On that barren day I suspected that all the love I thought you had given me was indeed my own. I was mistaken in feeling it came from you. It was mine and it belonged to me. Wherever it had gone, I wanted it back. All of it, every single heartbeat spent in your name.

  I demanded that the White Lodge should apply the Law of Karma. A payback from the Universe to me for the scorn
you had shown me. Your actions had to have a price to pay. I wanted a huge compensation for what you had stolen. If the Universe wouldn’t comply with my demand, I would get what I wanted myself. Your stupid choices and the state of affairs you had brought upon us were so primitive and ugly. They made me want to vomit. My powers had not deserted me. I was simply and very dangerously misusing them. Consequences could be terrible but that was the last of my preoccupations.

  That’s how, sitting on the bench in the Green, I invoked the help of the Dark Side. I rejected my nature, my True Identity and my past work in a moment of madness. Of course, the Counterplan would be flexible enough to incorporate the whims of Cassandra, the Saviour of the World! The answer came in a second. A tall handsome man with chin-length wavy hair came to sit next to me. His smile was enigmatic as he asked me if I was okay. My consciousness expanded when my eyes met his. The wind was now blowing in a totally different direction.

  “Miss Morgante, what a privilege to meet you. Your wish is my command.”

  I wasn’t surprised that he knew who I was, given my fame. My new ally was a sheep in wolf’s clothing. I didn’t realise it right there on that bench but my battle with the Dark Forces had begun.

  “My name is Robert Harker. This is quite a coincidence. I’ve been meaning to contact you for some time.”

  I no longer wanted to cry. The sudden appearance of this intriguing stranger cut my intentions short. His impeccable, elegant presence was electric. His voice was soothing and very sensual. His eyes were mesmerising. His beauty was familiar. Yet I could have sworn I’d never seen that man before. He spoke with a public school English accent. His words went straight to the splinter of my despair and seemed to want to pull it out. I was enthralled.

  As we conversed, I realised I’d not felt this well in ages. There was a sense of spaciousness enveloping my life. My heart reminded me of its presence again. As soon as it did, I tried to gaze at the man’s aura. I couldn’t see past his body. At least he had stirred up my curiosity and made me want to use my powers again. That had to be considered an improvement in my situation.