by Lylah James
“But, Boss—” he started.
I sprang forward and wrapped my fist around his collar, pulling his feet off the floor. “Did you fucking hear what I just said?”
He swallowed hard and nodded. I released him, and he fixed his shirt. How did they think I would let him stitch me up before taking care of Ayla first?
I glanced at Viktor, and he shook his head in exasperation. “Sam, do what he says. He’ll never listen to any of us. Take care of Ayla first.”
Viktor went to the bathroom, and I turned to face Ayla again. Sam leaned forward, placing a knee beside Ayla on the bed.
He took hold of the towel but didn’t move it from her. He glanced at me, his expression pensive. “Boss, may I? With your permission, I need to see how bad it is.”
My hands fisted to the side. I hated the thought of another man seeing her body, but what choice did I have?
Sam waited for my permission. I felt the urge to yell and carve his eyes out but instead stood frozen.
When I felt someone touch my arm, I swiveled around to see Viktor holding a towel. “Tie it around your wound. It’ll stop the bleeding for now.”
I bent down and quickly tied it around the bleeding area. After making sure it was in place and wouldn’t spill blood everywhere, I walked to the other side of the bed.
From the corner of my eye, I saw Viktor and Nikolay quietly leaving the room, giving us privacy. Lena stood beside Sam, looking just as worried as before. Her tears were long gone, but her face showed her sorrow and fatigue.
There was Maddie. And then there was Ayla. How much more could she take?
I climbed in bed beside Ayla. Moving closer, I molded my body around hers. I held her to me for a second, breathing in her fresh scent.
I sent Sam a fierce stare and then nodded. Lena settled at Ayla’s feet, her hands knotted on her lap. Turning my attention back to Ayla, I saw Sam carefully pulling the comforter and then the towel away from Ayla’s body.
I heard him suck in a breath and glanced up to see his frown as he took in the bruises that marred Ayla’s pale skin.
I had avoided looking at the bruises too, fearing I would snap from seeing the evidence of what she had been through.
Deep, purple bruises covered her arms and legs. Some were faded, but others looked fairly new. Maybe a few days. Her knees and elbows were scraped. Probably from the hard ground. The skin looked ragged in some places.
As I continued to look at her body, my breath became erratic and my lungs tightened. The side of her left leg was nearly black, and one of her arms was starting to turn an ugly shade of green. This bruise was probably less than a week old.
There were other small cuts all over her body. Her face was slightly bruised but looked much better than the rest of her.
One thing that took me by surprise was her stomach. The skin from her chest to the fullness of her stomach was pale and clear of any bruises. Not even a single one. It appeared as though her front was left unaffected and untouched.
I had no idea how Ayla protected herself in this state—all I knew was that I found her alive. She was breathing, and I would do anything to keep it that way.
With my face buried in her neck, I closed my eyes. I couldn’t lose her now. I lost her once, and that was it. Never again.
“She is badly bruised, Boss,” Sam finally muttered after inspecting Ayla’s body.
I lifted my head up just enough to look at Sam. “I can see that,” I snarled. “I want to know what you can do.”
If he was useless to me, I would have to find someone else to look after Ayla. I wanted to know if she was okay or not. If she would be okay.
“I can treat her wounds, of course,” Sam started. He paused, his eyes going to Ayla’s stomach. “She is pregnant, and I don’t know much about pregnancy.”
I clenched my jaw tight, grinding my teeth together. The words I didn’t want to acknowledge.
She is pregnant.
Fuck! I knew that, but hearing those words made it more real. It was real. This was real. My Angel was pregnant.
And I didn’t even know if the baby was mine.
My eyes moved to her round stomach again. I stared at the roundness for a few seconds before my gaze snapped up at Sam’s voice.
“During her captivity, we don’t know the trauma her mind and body took. And how that could affect her pregnancy and the baby,” he continued.
I hated being reminded of her captivity and how close I had been to losing her. I thought getting her out of that hellhole would be the end. As long as she was in my arms, everything would be okay.
But nothing looked okay.
Sam laid a hand on Ayla’s chest. “Her breathing isn’t laboured. So that’s a good sign. She’s probably just in a deep sleep. A lot of time, people who go through trauma, they tend to shut down. Sleep is one way to do so. Ayla would likely sleep through the day and night. It is best she rests. But you will need to keep checking on her.”
“I will. I won’t leave her alone,” I said, placing a kiss next to her ear. “I will be with her.”
As long as she took to heal, I would not leave her side.
I continued to pepper Ayla’s face and head with kisses as Sam cleaned her wounds. He disinfected them and wrapped bandages around the worst ones. He then applied salve on the bruises.
I whispered sweet words in her ears. My words were from the heart—the very same heart that was aching as she remained still. I told her how beautiful and brave she was. How she was my beautiful and perfect Angel.
She was my everything. Everything I could say, I whispered in her ears, hoping that even in her sleep, she could hear me.
I caressed her. My hands wandered over her soft skin, never once stopping while Sam finished up.
I touched her, held her, kissed her. And all the while, she stayed immobile. If it wasn’t for the rise and fall of her chest, she would have appeared dead.
It scared the hell out of me, and I prayed—hoped that she would wake up fast. I needed her beautiful green eyes. Her sweet voice.
When Sam was done, he leaned back, and I quickly adjusted Ayla’s towel again. After properly covering her up, I tugged her closer to me.
“Boss, I did what I could. But I am not specialized in pregnancy. You will need—”
“Already taken care of.”
Sam was cut off by Nina’s voice. I lifted my head up to see Nina and another woman walking into the room. “She’ll take it from here,” Nina said, nodding toward the stranger.
“Mr. Ivanshov,” she said in greetings. “I am an obstetrician. With your permission…” She nodded toward Ayla.
“How qualified are you?” I growled when she started to approach the bed. My arms went around Ayla protectively, glaring at the woman in front of me.
“Alessio, she’s good. I have known her for years. And she pretty much knows about us,” Nina said with a sigh.
The woman smiled. “My father is one of your men. Erik Cooper. I’m Ivy Cooper.”
The name definitely rang a bell. Her father took care of my clubs with Mark.
Finally nodding at her, she approached the bed and settled beside Ayla. Ivy pulled the towel apart. When she placed her hand over Ayla’s round stomach, I closed my eyes and ignored her.
I pushed my face in Ayla’s neck; her sweet scent helped calm me.
A few minutes later, my eyes opened at the sound of Ivy’s voice. “There is a heartbeat.”
I didn’t realize that I was waiting for her reassurance. As soon as I heard her words, a sense of overwhelming relief filled me.
I shuddered and took a deep breath. Placing a kiss on Ayla’s neck, I whispered, “We are going to be okay.”
“I used both a stethoscope and fetal Doppler. If I can hear a heartbeat, then she is definitely past twelve weeks. But unfortunately, I can’t tell for sure how far along she is or how healthy both mother and baby are. I will need to do an ultrasound for that and some tests. She needs to wake up too, so I can ask some quest
ions,” Ivy continued.
My fingers tightened around Ayla’s where our hands were intertwined between us. “The baby isn’t moving, either. Her stomach is too rigid for my liking. As long as there is a heartbeat, it’s good. But you will need to make sure the baby moves sometime soon. If it goes hours or even days with no movement, that’s not a good sign.”
“You’re saying something is wrong with the…” I paused, finding it hard to say the word.
Baby. A fucking baby.
Ivy ignored my slip and continued. “I can’t say anything for sure. I would suggest keeping vigil today and tomorrow. I will come back tomorrow to look for any changes. Sam said that I can use a part of his office for the ultrasound machines. This way you won’t have to move Ayla around much or take her out of the estate for checkups.”
She placed a hand over Ayla’s stomach, caressing the firm bump softly. “Ayla is a small woman. From the size of her bump, I would say she is past four months. Even though she was in captivity, her bump looks of a pretty healthy size. I would have to do the ultrasound for more information.”
“I will call you when she is awake,” I muttered, staring at the hand currently caressing Ayla.
Why did I find it hard to touch her stomach? I couldn’t even bring myself to stare at the bump for too long.
Feeling completely disgusted at my reaction, I blinked away and stared at Ayla’s sleeping face. She looked so peaceful, her face pale and relaxed. My Angel looked like a sleeping beauty.
But her sleep was probably plagued with nightmares.
I would be there to keep them away. I would fight her demons for her. After all, I promised to give her back her wings.
My chest grew tight, and my eyes pricked with unshed tears. For the first time in my life, I felt…weak.
Tears. Stupid fucking tears. I was crying.
“I will wait for your call,” Ivy mumbled before standing up. Lena quickly took her place and adjusted the towel around Ayla. She pulled the comforter over her and stepped away.
I saw Nina looking at Ayla, her face expressionless as always. After a few seconds, she left with Ivy without a word.
Sam came to my side. “Can I stitch you now?”
Without answering, I pushed my injured leg in his direction. My teeth ground together as he removed the bullet and stitched the wound. It was painful and burned like a goddamn bitch, but staring at Ayla’s sleeping face eased the pain.
I was lost in her, ignoring the needle as Sam finished up. After inspecting his work, he pressed a fresh bandage over the wound and stood up.
Sam didn’t say anything when he stepped out of the room. Lena fussed over Ayla, her forehead creased with worry lines.
“How is Maddie?” I asked mindlessly, pushing Ayla’s hair out of her face.
“She’s sleeping,” Lena replied quietly.
I nodded silently. So much happened, and I wondered how we were going to get back from it.
I started to pull the comforter over myself when I saw Viktor come into the room. “Painkiller,” he muttered, handing me the glass and pills he was carrying.
“What did Sam and Ivy say?”
I shrugged, quickly swallowing the pills. “As far as the bruises, she will heal. Ivy wants to do an ultrasound.”
“Alessio, the baby—”
“Not now.” I stopped him. “I don’t want to think about it now. My priority is Ayla.”
When I turned away from him, I heard him sigh. After waiting for a few seconds, he finally left the room and closed the door behind him.
Placing a kiss on Ayla’s forehead, I wrapped an arm around her chest, pulling her back to my front. I ignored the throbbing pain in my leg and closed my eyes.
“I’m sorry, Angel. For failing you. Disappointing you. If only I had listened. I don’t know how you will forgive me, but I promise that I will never fail you again,” I mumbled in her ear.
“You are my everything, Ayla. I just need you to wake up. We will figure everything else out after that. I promise I won’t leave your side,” I whispered.
She didn’t stir. Not even a twitch.
Her lack of movement felt like knives stabbing at my heart. I was hurting for her.
As the seconds, minutes, and hours ticked by, I slowly lost my resolve. My eyes drooped, and no matter how hard I tried to keep them open, it became almost impossible.
What the fuck.
When my vision blurred and I weakened with weariness, I swore.
My arms tightened around Ayla one more time. As my eyes closed and darkness clouded me, I finally understood.
The fucking asshole. He drugged me. Stupid sleeping pills.
Chapter 3
Sleepily, my eyes blinked open. My vision was blurred, and I tumbled over the edge of consciousness.
My eyes finally adjusted to the glaring sunlight a few seconds later. Ayla was still wrapped in my arms, her body anchored into mine.
My eyes widened when I found my hand over her round stomach. I stayed frozen for a second, too scared to move.
My throat felt suddenly dry, and I swallowed past the lump forming there. I pressed my hand more firmly into the roundness. The towel had fallen away, and I was now skin to skin with her belly.
Her stomach was stretched tight, but the skin was still surprisingly soft.
I stared at the contrast of my hand over her skin. My hand was big and rough, my palm taking about half of the fullness of her stomach. While even bruised, she radiated beauty.
I was still staring at Ayla’s abdomen, and instinctively, I started to rub small circles. When I realized what I was doing, I went to snatch my hand away but stopped dead.
My eyes widened, and my breath left my lungs in a loud whoosh.
What the hell.
There. It happened again.
The first time was so light that I barely felt it. But this time, it was harder.
My hand had moved when I felt it.
Was that…?
I leaned closer, my face only inches away from Ayla’s stomach. I waited and counted the seconds in my head.
When I started to give up, it happened again. And then again. Harder this time. I flinched and pulled away quickly.
“Mommy, can I feel the baby?”
She took my hand and placed it on her round belly. As soon as my palm made contact with her stomach, I felt a hard kick.
“She kicks hard,” I whispered.
“You used to kick harder.”
“I was feeling Princess moving.”
Swallowing hard against the unwelcomed memories, I placed my hand over Ayla’s pregnant belly again.
I felt it again. A kick. Or was it a punch?
It—the baby—was moving, and I was feeling him.
Without thinking, I caressed the spot where the baby just kicked. “You have finally decided to make your presence known,” I whispered.
There was another slight movement, and I stared at Ayla’s stomach in awe. Completely mesmerized.
I had come to a point where I didn’t know how to feel—I didn’t understand what I was feeling.
One moment I hated the idea of the baby, while the next I was mesmerised by his movement.
The way my chest tightened and my heart fluttered told me a different story. I didn’t hate the idea of the baby. I hated the situation.
But the baby came with this situation.
I was snapped out of my thoughts when the baby moved again. Pulling my hand away, I shook my head and looked up.
My heart stuttered, and I swore it stopped for a second.
Beautiful green eyes stared back at me.
I stared back, trying to catch my breath.
For so long, I wanted to look into those eyes. And now I was.
My lips wobbled into a small smile, and I sat up, leaning forward into her. Her eyes were a glimmer color of emerald. They sparkled brighter in the light of the morning sun. Her black hair was splayed across the pillows as she blinked sleepily at me.
So
beautiful. She looked like a Goddess. A real Angel.
My Ayla was back.
I couldn’t help but smile as I reached to palm her cheek.
“Ayla,” I croaked, rubbing my thumb over her velvety soft skin.
Her gaze softened the slightest bit, and a sweet smile whispered across her lips.
“Y…you…ha…ve his eyes.”
My eyes widened at her soft croaking voice. Ayla was talking!
But then confusion clouded my mind. “Whose eyes, Angel?”
I waited, but she didn’t speak again. My muscles started to lock in tension.
She stared and then finally whispered, so soft I barely heard her, “A…Al…Alessio.”
What?
“Ayla…what are you talking about? It’s me. Alessio. I am Alessio.”
And then she closed her eyes.
“No. No. No.” I panicked. “Angel, open your eyes. C’mon, show me those pretty green eyes.”
It wasn’t enough. I barely saw them. She had to stay awake. I had to hear her voice. I would beg for it if I had to.
I had no shame. Nothing else mattered.
“Angel,” I said, shaking her shoulders. “Please, say something.”
She didn’t even stir.
How long was she awake? Did I miss it? Was I sleeping the whole time she was awake?
How could I have been so fucking irresponsible?
This time I wouldn’t sleep. There was no way I would close my eyes again.
My heart raced like the wings of a caged bird. I did feel caged, and it was suffocating.
It felt like I was watching everything from the outside. Ayla was far away, and no matter how much I reached for her, she always ended up fading in the darkness.
She always faded away, and I was left empty.
No!
I took her hand in mine and talked. I talked for hours.
I begged for her to wake up. I begged for forgiveness. I begged for her love.
I made promises to cherish and take care of her.
But no matter how much I cajoled, fussed, and pushed, Ayla never moved or stirred.
Chapter 4